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My daily ramblings

Iamwhoiamwhoami December 1st, 2022

I am finally going to follow the lead and try and avoid posting in multiple different places. I am going to try and do most of my rambling in this thread.

My cognitive issues are making it harder and harder for me to focus on multiple things. That combined with my laundry list of other issues, makes functioning at all near impossible.

Having to go through medication experimentation again is going to make it even harder.

Whenever I have to refocus because I literally can’t remember blocks of time or where I am and why I’m here kinds of things , I’m usually able to come here and figure out through my posts and profile etc.

That has proven to not work very well at times. I wondered if I centralized my thoughts here that maybe that might work better.

That also keeps me from being a distraction from those who are more deserving than I.

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Helgafy March 1st, 2023

@Mytwistedsoul

Good morning to you beloved young man.

Thank you for the heart, it means a lot!
If you want to, you can tell what you did yesterday or what you're going to do today.
Well - about stave churches;
The news told last week:
In 1000 years a stave church has not been built in the old way, using horses and axes. A project will start now at Rysstad in Valle. They will copy the stave church in Borgund and build it at Rysstad in Valle. They think it will cost about 10 842 104 US dollars. Young persons will learn much, they think about 1000 workers will come (and go?). Probably also outside Norway some persons will be interested in the project.

So - I had my breakfast - and 2 hours after that an icecream with the taste of coffee and caramel.
Please, have fine meals for you today.

Helga.
4 replies
mytwistedsoul March 3rd, 2023

@Helgafy Good morning :) I'm glad you liked the heart ❤️ There's different colors too. I hope you're having a good day.

Yesterday it was dreary here in the morning. There wasn't much to do. It's still to chilly out to start planting anything. I did move some hay down to the horse barn. Today was a therapy day and since that's in town a trip to the grocery store was done. I baked a carrot cake afterwards lol

That project sounds amazing! They're going to build it like they did all those years ago? The Amish here have barn raisings. They just use man power and horses to do that. I've never actually seen one but from what I understand they can have a huge barn built in a day or two. Not quite the same as a church - not as many details but no power tools either. Kind of cool

Your ice cream sounds yummy lol. I had a grilled cheese with some tomato soup
4 replies
Helgafy March 4th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

Friend - still being there!

You wrote: " I'm glad you liked the heart.There's different colors too." I have a friend at Lillehammer (where Winter-OL was some years ago - I met her in Rome). She gave me a ceramic bowl with many colours. It says in it: "Love comes in many colours" - almost what you wrote about the heart. (I think English says "colours" and American "colors").

You baked a cake and also ate grilled cheese and tomato soup. Very nice. I like it when you give tasty nourish to yourself.

I have watched the Amish from the USA on TV. It's like watching a play from the 18. century.

I'm glad you're at 7cups and hope you have good meetings with people here. And beside that I also hope Jesus Christ soon will fill your heart with joy and peace. John 1.2 says: "Yet to all who received him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God. " Maybe it would be good for you to read a Psalm from the Bible each night.

You have a cat. Maybe you have seen the musical "Cats" by Andrew Lloyd Webber. "Memory" and "Jellicle Songs" are 2 of the nice songs.

I hope your meeting with the therapist went OK yesterday.

All for now - Helga.


1 reply
mytwistedsoul March 6th, 2023

@Helgafy Love does come in many colors - ❤️ 💙 💜 💛 shapes and sizes too. It sounds like a very nice bowl. You've been to Rome?! Amazing! I've never been out of the US :)


The Amish have pretty strict beliefs about many things. But their lives seem simple and honest. And they have a very close relationship with god

I'm glad you're on cups too. I've seen you here and there on the site and I see you offering people comfort. That's always nice to see. I've met a lot of really nice people here and a few not so nice lol

I haven't seen Cats but I have heard the song memories and I'll look up jellicle :)


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Helgafy March 4th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

Hah friend. Now I'm so glad. I got the code 065 and could not send. Then I tried to delete the heart I had copied from your writing, and it went through!

1 reply
mytwistedsoul March 6th, 2023

@Helgafy I was getting codes too and a few times couldn't get on site because of a bad gateway code *smh*

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Iamwhoiamwhoami OP March 4th, 2023

@Helgafy

@mytwistedsoul

even though I am not in any place near to being comfortable in exchanging conversations, I am thankful that you both have chosen to continue your communications here where I can in some strange, faint way feel a small part of . Thank you.

1 reply
mytwistedsoul March 5th, 2023

@Iamwhoiamwhoami Hey :) I was hoping you didn't mind. I remember you had said before that we were welcome to talk here but I did worry that maybe we were taking over your thread - in a way I guess we did lol


I hope you'll join in sometimes when or if you feel up to it but there's no pressure either
It's nice to see you Iam
*Sending you good vibes*
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Iamwhoiamwhoami OP March 5th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

of course I don’t mind. Your conversation with @Helgafy has spun an unexpected twist in this thread. Permanently affixing some positivity and hope in a very dark place.

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mytwistedsoul March 6th, 2023

@Iamwhoiamwhoami I'm glad it brought an unexpected twist :) We're shining light for you Iam ❤️

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Helgafy March 7th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

@Iamwhoiamwhoami

Good morning to you bluebirds! I call you both bluebirds. You're both climbing in my hair, at the right side of my head, comforting me. I hope you don't mind. Please tell me if you do.

Thank you so much "Iam" for giving both "twist" and me great honour through your message from "sun". It was very nice of you to do so.

I have a question for you both - do you want D. Trumph to be the next president of the US?

From Helga.

2 replies
mytwistedsoul March 9th, 2023

@Helgafy Good evening :) I don't mind at all if it brings you comfort. Did you have a rough day? I hope tomorrow is a good day for you


I'm not sure if that's who I would vote for. Right now I would vote for a goldfish in if it meant getting rid of our current leaders. I have a very strong opinion of the things that are going on in my country. I mean no disrespect to anyone who disagrees with me but we'll have to agree to disagree ;)
Helgafy March 9th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

Friend.

About D. Trump. We mostly don't like him in Europe. I hope I'll not watch him at the news. He is a narcissist. I met a girl from the US in Switzerland when I was in my 20.th. She is a teacher in Alaska. She didn't want to have more contact with me because i said "He (Trump) is lieing like the Devil."

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Helgafy March 9th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

I just want to write a little bit more of what you mean to me, you 2 small, blue birds.

As you know I live by myself. And I like to have you 2 around. My flat is 92m2 so you have enough space. Sometimes you just move so fast from place to place that you're almost like a rocket. Sometimes - when I'm in bed to rest - you walk on my chest. Sometimes you're having fun, marching on my chest. That's funny!
You can also become very big, filling up the whole space of my b edro om.
Well - this is a bit what my imagination is like.

Helgafy March 9th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

So friends. Here comes the 3. message for today. I'll draw your attention to Joyce Meyer ministries. At my TV I have a channel called GodTV, sent from England I think. There her Christian shows are sent. For about 20 years I have followed her, also reading her books and listening to tapes I bought. They also have a mission called "Hand of hope" - reaching out to people with all kinds of needs. As the both of you she has experienced abuse in her childhood - but now she's doing fine. Maybe it is good for you to listen to her, she's funny also.

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mytwistedsoul March 10th, 2023

@Helgafy I enjoy reading the things you write and I think your imagination is wonderful :) Every time I see the bluebirds here I think of you. Going fast from place to place does sound like me sometimes lol

I'm glad we've been talking here in Iam's space. It's been really nice getting to know you ❤️
I'll have to look up Joyce Meyer. I'm not sure if that channel is included what we have but there is probably something online
I included a video that I remembered when you were talking about Iam and me being your bluebirds 💙
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Helgafy March 5th, 2023

@Iamwhoiamwhoami

Hi Iam.

You made me feel happy!

amiableBlackberry92 March 31st, 2023

@Iamwhoiamwhoami

Just wanted to pop in and say Hi to you. I was thinking I hadn't seen you around here lately and wanted to let you know I am thinking about you. I hope this little message gives you the lift its meant to give.

Best always

ABB💟

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exuberantSailboat7135 March 9th, 2023

❤️

mytwistedsoul March 10th, 2023

@Iamwhoiamwhoami Hey :) You pop into my thoughts every time I visit here. I light a candle and send you good vibes and thoughts

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Helgafy March 11th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

What a nice video! And his nails tapping well in the rhythm of the song. And marching - just like the 2 of you - ha.ha!

Helgafy March 11th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

How gentle and nice you are with Iam twist.

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Helgafy March 12th, 2023

@Iamwhoiamwhoami

@Mytwistedsoul

Hi bluebirds on a Sunday.

I have a small bird- swing at the opening of my door at my be droom. You 2 like to swing there. But today the both of you are just sitting there with the head under a wing. Maybe it is because you were out the whole night drinking tequila from the senorita-shoe. (Please listen to the song from the Norwegian singer Jørn Hoel - "Lost in The Tango". And really - I can hear you sing there too.)

2 replies
mytwistedsoul March 14th, 2023

@Helgafy Good afternoon :) The senorita shoe makes much more sense after listening to the song! You really can hear birds in there every now and again :) It's a catchy little song

Today it's cold and windy with some snow flurries every now and again. Started a project painting the living room. It took two years to decide on a color lol! It's definitely brightened up the room
I hope you're doing ok today ❤️
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Helgafy March 15th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

Thank you twist for your writing. Now, at 4 p.m. the 15.th. I can greet you from the first owl this year singing in a tree, just for you!
So - you're painting the living room! Great! (Many ! today..). If you want to you can tell the colour (ha.ha. - I continue to write colour the English way with an "u"). I have not painted the rooms in my flat myself. The 2 bed rooms are painted lime-colour. The rest a light yellow.

You have a bit of snow. We have snow too.

Take care.
Helga.

2 replies
mytwistedsoul March 16th, 2023

@Helgafy You heard an owl! That's so cool! I love to hear the owls

There was a beautiful sunrise this morning. The sky was shades of pink and peach with streaks of blue
I think that's what the color of the living room was - some light shade of green. The color it's going to be now is called a touch of sand. It's a light beige I guess?
It's hard to believe that it's almost spring. I'm really looking forward to warmer temperatures and getting the garden ready :)
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Helgafy March 16th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

Hello twist and Iam.

Thank you so much for writing, I'll comment on that tomorrow. Today I choose to write about myself.
I'm very low in energy - just staying in my bed (as I usually do until 5 p.m.). I wish Jesus Christ would heal me (I guess I have said that before to you). There is this verse in the Bible: Isaiah 53:5 "But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him and by his wounds we are healed." So He took both our sins and our sicknesses on the cross. But it seems like most often we have to go through doctors to get healed.

I dreamt last night. Someone asked me: "How is your life?" I answered: "I don't have a life. I'm just indoors. I can't go outside to meet life with strength."

Well. I have told you earlier about my brother living on the island Sotra. Last week on the local news they showed 2 sea eagles from there. They were sick, poisoned by lead. Some (I guess they were professionals) took care of them and made them well. We could see when they let them out to flee. One of them (the he) - when he was held, the feathers at his neck and head rose - meaning he was ready to bite!

So they let him out of the cage. He rose, high, high and flew. Very mighty. The girl went out of the cage, not really knowing if she was free, but then she flew away also.

So this is what I wanted for my days: Isaiah 40:31 " but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not faint."

But instead I became a hen who is not even good at walking.


Helgafy March 17th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

Hi twist. I will write to you today also.

Thank you so much for writing. Thank you for your fine description of the sky. It's really beautiful.
I always liked owls because I like wisdom and some said owls are wise, but I don't know. I have 3 owls in my house. 1 blue from China, my uncle bought it there and two woven in a carpet.
The colour of sand - nice.
The spring is late where you live and where I live. In the news yesterday it was said that it has never been earlier than this year in Japan. The cherry trees are blooming.
Disney did some photoshoots at Svalbard. They thought it was fine for a new movie by Tom Cruise. But they're only allowed to land about 20 times (or places) with a helicopter because of the nature/wild-animals. So they are discussing it up there now.

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SunShineAlwaysGrateful March 17th, 2023

@Iamwhoiamwhoami

Hello from Newfoundland & Labrador Canada 🇨🇦 the home of iceberg alley! The season has started ! Yay ! 🦅🐻‍❄️🦭🥶❄️🧊

I am thrilled to see the activity here on this thread … just beautiful support all the way around.

Just wanted to say hello 👋 it’s my first day as Forum Supporter … these messages here made me smile right large …. 😊


Cheri



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Iamwhoiamwhoami OP April 1st, 2023

@SunShineAlwaysGrateful

The thanks for that deserve to be sent to @Helgafy and @mytwistedsoul. They are the ones continuing to bring their sunshine, their positivity and support to this very dark spec in the universe. They continue to build a friendship in a place built upon negative things. Proving that there is true humanity still in existence in this world. I have nothing to do with their beautiful interactions here.

They deserve the recognition for your kindness and support of their efforts. Thank you.

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mytwistedsoul March 21st, 2023

@Helgafy @Iamwhoiamwhoami You've both been in my thoughts ❤️

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Helgafy March 22nd, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

Always wonderful twist. Thank you.

Helgafy March 22nd, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

@Iamwhoiamwhoami

Friends Iam and twist.

I was so very down with depression. I could not even see God, I was thinking like an atheist. And I didn't see the meaning of being positive and thankful.
But the day passed. I could see myself in my mind running over the green hills towards my Father. Luke 15:20-24 "So he got up and went to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son. But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and k ill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was de ad and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’ So they began to celebrate.

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Helgafy March 23rd, 2023

@Iamwhoiamwhoami

@Mytwistedsoul

Hi!

Yesterday I was thinking of one line of a song. The line is "Turn around". You can hear it 2 times in the song "Total Eclipse of the Heart" by Bonnie Tyler. (The rest of the poetry in the song has nothing to do with me - ha.ha. It is a bit scary with the eyes and the students are too young for her..). What I want for the lives of the 3 of us is that our lives turn around to be very good and fulfilling.

Helgafy March 24th, 2023

@Iamwhoiamwhoami

@Mytwistedsoul

To my brothers at 7Cups.

Today I give you the old song "Chain Reaction" by Diana Ross. Let us all get into the chain reaction so our lives become better and better and we fly higher and higher. Ross was married to the Norwegian mountainclimber Arne Ness and she has a son together with him.

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mytwistedsoul March 25th, 2023

@Helgafy Hey :) I'm sorry that you were so down with depression. It's horrible feeling that low that you can't see any light any where. It's heavy. Are you able to sleep when you feel that down?

I've heard that song Total Eclipse of the Heart. I'll have to watch the video. I've heard of Diana Ross but know absolutely none of her music but it was an ok song. Her husband passed away doing what he loved. I hope to be that spry at his age. You find good messages in songs ❤️
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Helgafy March 27th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

@Iamwhoiamwhoami

Thank you for your writing twist.
You asked me about my sleep. And yes, I sleep more than I have done my whole grown-up life. Because of depression I take Duloxetin Pensa 120 mg each day (blood test showed that 60 mg was not enough). They keep you a little bit awake (I take them in the morning) and therefore I take a small dose (15mg) of Truxal in the evening. I can be very depressed during the day and lighten up at 6 p.m. and have a good evening.

Today you 2 birds are following me around, flying around my head and climbing on my sweater of wool - so I don't feel alone. We have snow and 0 degrees Celsius again today. My sweater has 2 reindeer, 1 person skiing, 1 fir tree and a four leaf clover.

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Helgafy March 27th, 2023

@Mytwistedsoul

@Iamwhoiamwhoami

Hi.

I came to think of a song "The wind beneath my wings" by Bette Middler (she is funny in movies). Iam and twist - you are that (wind) to me.
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mytwistedsoul March 28th, 2023

@Helgafy I'd like to thank you too. For writing and for your friendship. They both give me something to look forward to :) and help me feel less lonely

Depression is hard to deal with. I'm sorry that it plagues your days but I'm glad it lightens up enough so you can have a good evening
It's been warmer here but rainy alot. We've even had a few thunderstorms this spring already. We didn't get much snow this winter as we usually do. Your sweater sounds perfect for a cold day! I'm happy to spend the day climbing on it with @Iamwhoiamwhoami and keeping you company
*Sending you both warmth and much love* ❤️
1 reply
Helgafy March 29th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

@Iamwhoiamwhoami

Thank you twist for your writing.
You 2 birds are flying around today. But you think it is cold in Norway so I knitted you socks, vest (so you still can fly), scarf and hat.

When I was 22 I had finished studying. I went to Switzerland. For some time I stayed at a woman's house and did some housekeeping there. She had a white poodle. It was wintertime with snow in the mountains so I knitted socks for the dog when I took it outside.

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