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Eva’s Crazy Mind

justmeeva January 21st

i’ve wanted to make a forum post like that for quite a while now, but never brought myself to actually make it. here i will write up all sorts of thoughts and vents, everything i need to get off my mind. it’s not gonna be positive or motivational, not even close. i personally don’t recommend reading it just because it doesn’t help lol. you’re welcome to read, replies are okay, just be aware that it’s gonna be a pretty dark place. i don’t usually ask for help despite telling everybody to. idk why. i’m not a very good example of what’s right to do. TW just in case, not planning to go that far but who knows. 

i’m making myself this space because sometimes you can feel lonely while being surrounded by a million people and that’s nobody’s fault.

best wishes to you. ❤️

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justmeeva OP March 8th

@LoveMyMoonflowers @unassumingEyes

i’m really sorry if i made you worried and didn’t come back before, there’s just something on cups that i think triggered that night and i wanted to forget it so my solution was to stay away for a little. i feel horrible for not coming here earlier, for making all this drama and make you worry i’m very very sorry i love you so so much

justmeeva OP March 8th

anyone here..?

justmeeva OP March 8th

*shaking*. 

justmeeva OP March 8th

“all the things she said

all the things she said

running through my head

running through my head

running through my head”

justmeeva OP March 8th

the tears keep flowing and my body keeps shaking

unassumingEyes March 8th

@justmeeva youre alive oh thank god

Dont apologize!! I said all i need is eva being eva! Thats all i was worried about. Im seriously not mad at youu but my responses are gonna be a bit slow rn cuz im processing😭❤️❤️

@iloveyouxx see? She came back ❤️

14 replies
unassumingEyes March 8th

@unassumingEyes @justmeeva gtg eva buddy dinner time ❤️ lots of hugs❤️ ly sooo much ❤️ and im v.v.v proud of you (we all are :p) ❤️❤️❤️

1 reply
justmeeva OP March 8th

@unassumingEyes 

it’s ok enjoy your dinner, love you. ❤️

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iloveyouxx March 8th

@unassumingEyes @justmeeva

ahgsghgfjsgfgh. omg. :'3 I got the notification and was so happy that it somehow turned to overwhelming anxiety.. :P idk how that happens.🤍 I can see hehe.❤️ I’m processing too T^T @justmeeva I was so worried🥺🩷 you don’t gotta apologize at all frend. 7 cups just isn’t the same without evabuddy.💕💕 also are you oki ? >: well um now that I’m here I can guess that you’re not :'3💜. I’m sorry I wasn’t there. I’m happy some other lovely people were.🤍 I know it can’t solve much. and I was gonna sleep ngl but now I got too excited/anxious(?)(xD) to sleep..so I’m here.💙 if you wanna talk. I’m here.🤍 but it’s oki. it’s oki :'3🤍 I’ll just be here.💖love you frend. it’s oki💜.

11 replies
unassumingEyes March 9th

@iloveyouxx ur reaction is pretty much my reaction😂😭❤️

3 replies
iloveyouxx March 9th

@unassumingEyes

😂😭😭 *🧠⚡️🧠* :P❤️ we love evabuddy vv much :'3❤️ so much that we broke how science is meant to science :P *tw* but I literally got a sharp feeling in my chest seeing that notification :')🩷 and had to avoid going on caps xD💜 I love you too eyesfrend <33 please try not to leave without saying anything :0/lh it’s scary heh💜:') and I’d have to leave first xD cos ily too much to have you leave first :P🤍/lh 

2 replies
justmeeva OP March 9th

@iloveyouxx 

i’d never leave leave without saying anything. 🩷 but i understand it might’ve been scary. i’m really really sorry 😔

1 reply
iloveyouxx March 9th

@justmeeva

smh nu stop apologizing :')/(completely)lh💓

it’s only scary cos we care about you fren :c💜

yous dont need to keep apologizing hehe xD/lh🤍 

we only wanted you to be oki.💙 nothing else :'3💖

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justmeeva OP March 9th

@iloveyouxx 

oh wow i saw it so late smh. i’m sorry for making you worry 🩷 idk how i am - it’s been pretty.. crazy those past few days. or weeks. or months. idk. 

i hope you did get some sleep, i didn’t mean to steal sleep hours from you D: 

love you nadia fren 💕

6 replies
iloveyouxx March 9th

@justmeeva

nu don’t apologize D:🤍 

.. :') 

and in those months I haven’t seen you talk about it once frend >:💜 you’ve always put everyone else first…🩷

it’s so selfless and thoughtful.. I think I’d like that about myself hehe.💕💕

but you’ve always needed support too :')💙 not only when it gets even worse :c🤍 

wish I could’ve been there for yous :/💜

it’s oki not to know.. when things get too much it’s hard to process it all :')🤍

it’s oki..it’ll be oki..💓

hehe and it’s oki :0 I slept by accident :D again :P idk how many hours but I slept.💙

always love you more.🥺💓



5 replies
justmeeva OP March 9th

@iloveyouxx 

no no it’s not your fault lovely. i know you’re going through things yourself.. i wouldn’t expect you to deal with me. i get pretty impossible at nights :p though I really really appreciate you 🩷 but don’t blame yourself in any way. no no. i won’t let you. 🩷

1 reply
iloveyouxx March 9th

@justmeeva

mm I wouldn’t call it “dealing with you” :0 just being there for and supporting you like you’ve always deserved to be💜😞 aw nu I feel the same way :'3 and that’s oki.. nights are a dark time🖤 

hehe nu shifting this about me :P I just care about you a lot frend :C hate seeing you go through so much..💙


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justmeeva OP March 9th

@iloveyouxx 

(i’m a bit busy rn so if my responses are slow or short - that’s why)

it’s okay. i’ll manage, somehow i always do. *gives you a big hug if oke* ❤️

1 reply
iloveyouxx March 9th

@justmeeva

(it’s oki.tyt.🤍)

you will.💜

hehe it’s still always oki :> *hugs tight and doesn’t let go*🩷🦑

hug-warm-hug.gif


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justmeeva OP March 9th

@iloveyouxx 

i love that gif so much 🩷 thank you

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justmeeva OP March 8th

my head’s hurting from the crying now

justmeeva OP March 8th

it’s not fair it’s not *** fair 

justmeeva OP March 8th

i can’t be here right now. bbl. 

mytwistedsoul March 8th

@justmeeva Hey :) sorry if I'm intruding 

- Are you ok? Well I mean obviously something's wrong *sits with you* 

13 replies
justmeeva OP March 8th

@mytwistedsoul

you’re not intruding, don’t worry

mm “ok” wouldn’t be a very good description of what i am right now. a lot’s going on, so many emotions, so much confusion.. yeah. 

(i appreciate you being here, a lot)

12 replies
mytwistedsoul March 8th

@justmeeva Ok :) I try to check one the first post because I know sometimes having strangers come on to our personal threads can be alittle scary but with the pen pal threads and stuff it gets really confusing 😬

Does if help to ground yourself? Maybe a few deep breathes? 

11 replies
justmeeva OP March 8th

@mytwistedsoul 

yeah, i get that

i managed to calm down now, but my mind’s still.. crazy. 

10 replies
mytwistedsoul March 8th

@justmeeva Would you like to talk about what's on your mind? I'm not a listener but if you're comfortable sharing here - we can talk about it :) 

9 replies
justmeeva OP March 8th

@mytwistedsoul 

i don’t know - it might be pretty triggering,  idk if it’s just rumours, if i’m overthinking it or if it’s true, i really don’t know what to do about it. 

mytwistedsoul March 8th

@justmeeva I'll consider myself warned if you want to say more ok? Is there anyone who can verify anything you heard? I know sometimes too we need to consider the source of the rumors - if it's from someone reliable or if they're known to try and start trouble

justmeeva OP March 8th

@mytwistedsoul 

well..~

tw

we talked in one class today, that there’s a possibility for war. that we might be in danger. if trump gets chosen as the president again at least. idk how or why, but we’re a small country so it almost makes sense. i refuse to believe that. but also… it’s been in the news apparently. 

justmeeva OP March 8th

@mytwistedsoul 

btw it’s okay if you don’t know what to say. i don’t either. it’s unexpected and bad and- i understand ❤️ i should probably go in a few minutes anyway. 

mytwistedsoul March 8th

@justmeeva  I can understand why that would get your mind going with alot of thoughts. Idk - this is my opinion ok? If you look back to when he was in office the first time there were no w*rs. The media said back then when he was first elected that there would be w*r but it didn't happen until he was out of office and the new administration started. The news isn't what it used to be. More often than not they tell half truths or just leave out what doesn't fit the narrative they're telling everyone. I think that there's alot of fear mongering that's going on. That's just my thoughts though :)

justmeeva OP March 8th

@mytwistedsoul 

i don’t know anything about politics, or usa, or him - i’m just thinking about what i heard from my teacher. she said she has heard a lot of news about this situation and there are people to confirm that it’s possible. i really do not know tho. not a clue, about anything.

mytwistedsoul March 8th

@justmeeva Yeah unfortunately I don't know for certain either. I do know that there's alot of people that have a great deal of faith in him and I mean millions lol.   If it helps ease your mind alittle - the elections are months away. And maybe with alittle more time we'll all see a clearer picture of what the future might bring

Thank you for talking with me today. You take care ok? 

justmeeva OP March 8th

@mytwistedsoul 

yeah, time will show i guess. 

thank you for listening, and i really mean it ❤️

mytwistedsoul March 8th

@justmeeva You're welcome :)

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