Ramblings 3

@Tinywhisper11

I am awfully tired for some reason, so if I don’t respond right away I probably dozed off again. So I apologize in advance. 💕💕💕 I embrace you in a hug smelling of lavender, I love you 💕💕💕. Thank you for the shower , I desperately needed it 💕💕💕

@Iamwhoiamwhoami hugs you tightly back ❤❤ I fell asleep not long after I messaged you last, and I haven't long woke up😂😂 we must be starting to prepare for our winter hibernation😂😂😂

Even my mind and body like to mess with me. I was really tired, I could barely open my eyes. I write about how tired I am and the strong chance of falling asleep, then a short while later I am wide awake.

@Iamwhoiamwhoami don't worry I'm sleeping enough for the both of us ❤😁

I had to look back at what Tiny called it , but I was thinking about my pfp . I can’t even tell what it really is even if I look at it on my laptop.

I found that picture online somewhere, and it is a good representation of me in several ways. To me the picture represents on one side, the part of me that I will never become. A woman trapped in the darkness looking longingly into the light and knowing that she will never live in the light so will never grow and blossom. In the other side it is the rest of me that has spent a lot of years living in the endless tunnels in the darkness and realizing that I have become so used to the darkness that I wouldn’t stand a chance of surviving in the light.

I should change it I suppose . At least to something that ca be easier to recognize what it is.

@Iamwhoiamwhoami I can see what it is ❤❤ and I really like it ❤❤ but yeah maybe a change would be nice, what sort of thing was you thinking??

@Tinywhisper11 I'll be back as soon as I can, sorry I gotta take meds and get dressed, this night take a while ❤ I love you ❤

@Tinywhisper11

Ok, I will be right here. ❤️ I love you too ❤️

Did you see helgafys message about our messages making others uncomfortable? She put LOL there as well.

@Iamwhoiamwhoami no I did not 😂😂😂😂😂😂 I'll back track and find it in a minute😂😂😂😂😂 helga is amazing ❤❤

@Tinywhisper11

It is right above your message about your pine cone in the window. ❤️❤️

@Iamwhoiamwhoami I just saw it😂😂😂😂😂😂

@Tinywhisper11

I really have no idea ❤️

@Iamwhoiamwhoami It reminds me of the little girl in Poltergeist. When she sat in front of the tv 

@Tinywhisper11

Ok, definitely needs to change…..❤️

@Iamwhoiamwhoami 😂😂😂😂😂 soul, don't scare iam😂😂😂

@Tinywhisper11

@mytwistedsoul

Yep, that’s it. I will try and find something else.❤️

@Iamwhoiamwhoami Tbh seeing it small on my phone I always thought it was a set of glowing eyes lol. It wasn't until I enlarged it that I realized that's not what it was

How about your favorite animal? Or maybe some really nice scenery? You could change it with the seasons or go with the holidays? It's almost October you could pick something Halloween-ish? 

@mytwistedsoul

When I first saw it I thought it was a woman or girl in the dark looking out a window.

All of those ideas are definitely possibilities. What I would like is something that represents me and is a reality picture. That may not be a realistic option right now . This current picture , at least what I first saw in it does represent me , both the hidden part of me and the rest of me out in the open.

Looking from the darkness at the light shining from my friends.

I’m not savvy enough, or maybe I just don’t want to spend money on an app I don’t want just to use one picture for that purpose. I have taken pictures and they are “too big “ to load here.

It seems like I am making a mountain out of a molehill with this , and maybe I am. But that picture represents me, and as my username suggests I can’t figure this out.

Maybe I should just try and go back to the other one, and stop overthinking y.

Thank you as always.

@Iamwhoiamwhoami I understand your desire to have something that is "you". If the picture is too large you could crop it and save it so you can download it for you PFP. Or if it's on a website you could just download it. Or you could leave a link here and I can put it on imgur and give you a link for it and you could download it? I do agree that spending money on an app just for one picture isn't worth it. I'm happy to help if you'd like :)

@mytwistedsoul

I will keep that in mind thank you for offering to help.

@Iamwhoiamwhoami You're welcome :)

@mytwistedsoul

That is probably actually what it is, I never even thought about that, but you are right it definitely looks like it.

I being of questionably sound mind and a decrepit body, hereby do declare….. I have no idea what to declare.

@Iamwhoiamwhoami 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

@Iamwhoiamwhoami I think we should call a meeting about your pfp ❤

@Helgafy @mytwistedsoul iam, wants a new pfp all ideas would be great 😁❤

I personally think I'd you use my photo, then we'll look like twins and confuse people, whilst also be able to play pranks😁😁

@Iamwhoiamwhoami I managed to go outside and talk to my son and God yesterday ❤❤ today I got my psychiatrist coming to see me. She is really nice, but I still always get very nervous before seeing her for some reason. I do with all apointments though ❤

@Tinywhisper11

I might consider that idea of the of, but even so, I am not intelligent enough to figure out how to do that. 😆

That must’ve been a rewarding experience yesterday ❤️❤️

❤️❤️ I understand that feeling quite well, My anxieties decide to take over before every one of mine.❤️❤️

@Iamwhoiamwhoami when my carer was getting me dressed he said something about a big star 'puff daddy' being arrested. Alot of rumours are going around about Hollywood and lots of singers, not sure why. But he said to becareful, alot of rumours are being spread and to try stay out of it all. So I thought I should warn you too ❤

@Tinywhisper11

Thank you. There are many times when I think that is what fuels this country. Rumors. ❤️

@Iamwhoiamwhoami I think it fuels most countries🙁 princess kate, in the UK. She unfortunately had cancer🙁 her and Prince William wanted to keep it quiet, till they managed to sit their 3 children down and talk to them, tell them about it first. Their all very young children, it's a very sad situation. But within days rumours were spreading she had been kidnapped, or killed etc. It was terrible😥😥 people can be just so heartless

@Iamwhoiamwhoami ok I'm gonna be in and out for a while, so if I don't answer you straight away, it's because I'm trying to do 5 other things at the same time ❤😁 hugs you tightly ❤❤I love you ❤❤

Ok no worries, 💕💕I love you too 💕💕

@Tinywhisper11

As far as Hollywood is concerned, I think there has always been rumors and scandals. I don’t pay much attention to any of it.

@Iamwhoiamwhoami yeah I don't listen to news, or use anyother sites other than this, no social media, I like to live in my own little happy bubble. But still people insist on telling you all about theese things

@Iamwhoiamwhoami I bought myself a kite😁 for Xmas or my birthday yesterday. I never had toys so I'm living my childhood through adulthood😁 I buy myself toys, so I can have fun things to do on the day ❤ we have a huge garden here, so it should fly nicely 😁 I've also bought a baby grinch doll 😁

I didn’t know they made dolls of me. ❤️

A good wind and you could go for a ride. ❤️

@Iamwhoiamwhoami 😂😂 wind surfing would be fun ❤ and yep! Your famous ❤😂😂😂

I only learned about Xmas and Halloween, and all the other celebrations a few years ago. I didn't even know people had birthdays. So now I'm gonna celebrate everything I can ❤ 

@Tinywhisper11

❤️❤️ You deserve every one of those celebrations ❤️❤️

@Iamwhoiamwhoami ❤🙂❤