I do truly understand that reckless, lonely feeling. The best advice I have: it will pass. Not very helpful lol. But if doing what you do to kinda fill that void (cleaning, gaming, etc.) isn’t working, sometimes you just gotta get through that feeling. I know something that helps me is getting out the house, getting fresh air and being around people. Even though it may sound pathetic, being around people, even strangers, makes me feel more “connected” and less isolated.
I know it’s difficult to do with anxiety, but I try to get out at less busier times or go to smaller stores. That way my anxiety isn’t too bad and I can focus on just enjoying being at the store.
And you don’t have to buy anything! (but I usually do lol) Just seeing all the different holiday items makes me happy. Does anything in particular make you happy when you’re at the store? (I know it’s a weird *** question lol)
thank you for your messages. that and your support really go a long way. much appreciated.
im at work. almost done. very very unmotivated today. feeling very unappreciated. i’m gonna get out of here and just go home and prob continue to feel miserable. being bipolar is so corny lol
omg spilled blood is never good. i hope you’re ok.
anything at the store that makes me happy….hmmm idk tbh it depends on my mood. i could love it all or just as easily i can hate it all lol
i’m home now. in some sweats. cuddlin with the kitten farley. it def rocks but i still feel miserable. idky but i just can’t kick it. i feel like i need to complain about something that really annoys me when other people do it lol i have to be like i feel unappreciated at work. but also im bummed bc im lonely and i just wish i had a chick that would tell me im great and hug me when i feel like this. i know its dumb and i should do it myself but it feels nice when someone rly loves you like that. like i know my friends at work and stuff care about me a lot but no one even tries to talk to me when i get like this. i just wish someone would try to really talk to me.
I’m sorry you’re feeling unappreciated at work. I understand working so hard and feeling that goes unnoticed. Especially at bonus and promotion times. Maybe it’s time to stop going above and beyond? Just for awhile, until you feel better. It’s okay to not run at 100% all the time.
Well I’m here for you and can give you a virtual hug 🤗☺️. I know it’s probably difficult during this time of year to not be in a couple. What are some winter activities you and your ex used to do together? What are some winter activities you and family used to do together?
And it’s okay to complain and vent. Sometimes you just need to release your thoughts. Always here to listen ☺️.
It’s no fun feeling down. I do hope you have/are having a goodnight 💤.
thank you. you are very very sweet. it’s funny you say that maybe i should slow down at work bc that’s been my thought. and i rly don’t like having to do this. working hard makes time to by faster. i feel more productive. slowing it down to everyone else’s speed at work is miserable lol ill be ok tonight. just an off day ya know.
haven’t been able to sleep. took some melatonin but that’s not working tonight. i might skip work if i don’t sleep. no reason to stress it…no one there does. i hate thinking im like #1 at anything but i rly care and i rly do alllllot for people. above and beyond. and no one cares that much. so now it just feels foolish.
Good morning! I hope you have a good day today ☺️. I’ll respond to your messages in a little bit.
still feeling a bit down. i got about 4 hours sleep. called outta work. just not feeling anything today. hope you have a good day.
Good evening. How was your day? Has your mood improved at all since the morning?
I’m sorry to hear you only got 4 hours of sleep. Sometimes melatonin knocks me out. Sometimes it doesn’t. Hopefully you were able to catch up on some sleep today. What was keeping you up last night? Just a particular thought? Or kinda a swarming of thoughts?
I apologize if I’m being invasive, but what time of year did you and your ex break up? Was it around the holiday time?
you’re not being invasive. it’s good having someone to talk to about this. i feel very alone. no one has even texted to be like hey are you ok. i even talked to a work friend after i called out and even he didn’t ask if im ok. i get his kid a spidey and friends car toy for xmas…me and him worked overnights together and were close like best friends. but they kinda split us up and we def grew apart. but i still reach out..its just a text. i dont even get that. i need to stop doing so much extra at work. tbh im one of the best workers (not the best) but noooo one tries as hard as i do and no one has improved as much as i have. and i always come in with energy drinks or snacks for people. i think its time to cut that s.hit right out lol
i need to find an outlet. i used to be able to have a drink but i cant do that anymore. lately ive been thinking about it often.
I understand wanting to be go-go-go at work. I’m the same way. It makes the time go faster. And you feel productive, like you’re maybe making a difference. But I think it’s important to evaluate if your hard work is getting noticed or not. Does your supervisor appreciate you? Do you opportunities to learn new things first? Do you receive bonuses and promotions?
If you can’t identify any positive coming from your hard work, it’s time reevaluate how you show up at work. You can still be a hard worker and be productive (I still am). But when your 8 hours are over, LEAVE lol. Don’t be the first one to volunteer for OT. Don’t be the go to guy for coming in for callouts. Don’t skip your lunch or breaks (I’m really bad at doing that).
I’m not judging, but it seems like maybe you’re relying on work to fill a void in your life at the moment. I know you’re going through a tough time, but making time for activities you actually enjoy will make you feel better. Or just having a good cry session.
You will get over this down period. You just have to keep pushing yourself through it. Even if you stick to a boring routine of working, eating, sleeping, and repeating the cycle. It’s doing what you can for the moment until you feel better. And you will eventually feel better ☺️.
ok i’m gonna try to break this down and answers these questions bc they are really good and helpful. i’m gonna be honest.
i am noticed at work. they do appreciate me and i do have opportunities to learn more but im very uncomfortable with it. i feel like im not like these people. and im not smart enough to learn the way they do. i also see people i dont view as good workers getting talked about for promotions and it makes me wonder where i stand in all of this.
ok now you rly hit the nail on the head lol im legit crying a little rn. yeah im definitely feeling like…i have a lot of love to give and nooo one to give it to. i think im projecting that onto coworkers and dont get me wrong they are good people and very nice coworkers but not loved ones. i just miss having someone so much 😢
its dif time to reevaluate and shift gears. new year new me i guess. this is gonna hurt but its time to get real
oh and answering your question about when we broke up. the relationship was really bad for at least a full year. around november 23 i finally got back on *** and that’s when i found out she had a whole other relationship that had been going on for a year plus. it broke me. we talked and of course she lied and i bought it. the holidays were horrible for us (great with others) and we finally called it quits in march of this year. tbh i am sureee she’s having a beautiful holiday. meanwhile i sit here practically on house arrest bc i feel like i can’t do anything without having some kinda anxiety or frustration.
It seems like you’re frustrated and hurt no one is checking up on you. You’re “reaching out” but not getting anything in return. Does your family checkup on you? Are you close to your siblings at all?
I understand your hurt feelings. It’s disappointing and saddening when my own family doesn’t checkup on me. My mom and dad in particularly. I’ve always played “second mom” and was relayed on by my parents to be selfless and agreeable. I strived to give my all to my family, we’d all been through so much. Then my parents just dipped out and kinda left my siblings and I by ourselves. It was soo lonely not being around my family or around my mom. I felt soo unloved and unappreciated. I kinda cut off contact with my parents (kinda working on our relationship at the moment).
During this time, I’d rely on a close, true friend (if you have one). Or really throw yourself into caring for your kittens. That helped me a lot: having an animal that relies on me for its needs and that wants to snuggle and get pets. But most importantly, having an animal that loves you unconditionally. No matter what, they’ll always love you. Friends go, family becomes distant, but your pet is always beside you, available to cheer you up when needed.
I truly understand it’s difficult right now. But it will get better. You have to get rid of the old to make way for the new. Sometimes the “new” takes a while to show up. But you’ll meet better people to be friends with, that value and appreciate you. And you’ll meet a girl who truly loves you and knows she wants to spend her life with you. It just takes time.
Are you trying to be sober?
my family, like everyone else pretty much leave me alone. i def like my space but i wish people reached out. i feel like i roy need support and encouragement and i feel like an as.s for that lol i quit drinking 5 years ago. i spent a few years in the bottom of a bottle and my pancreas gave me serious problems. i struggled for a long long time but i finally quit 5 years ago. lately i miss it. i miss the release id get. i feel so pent up ya know
the unconditional love of an animal is next level. i’m rly getting there with these new guys. but what me and lana had was incredible. she was evil to everyone except me. she loooooved me. did whatever i said lol it was crazy. when she got sick it broke me. i was still with the ex but it was at the end and her not caring at all really really hurt
*** people always get promoted before actual knowledge people 😤😤😤. It’s hella annoying and really brings the work moral of the work environment down. At least it’s seriously doing that for my job right now.
Aww don’t put yourself down. I’m sure you’re smart. You learn so much on the job that you don’t learn in school etc. And you may just learn differently than other people. I know I learn best by note taking and actually doing that activity. No one way is the right way and any trainer should understand that.
You do so much at work but don’t like getting the recognition? Do you enjoy praise? That’s a biggg motivating factor. I love 💕 when my supervisor recognizes me. Coworkers, not so much lol. Anyway, I know it may be uncomfortable, especially since everyone won’t be happy for you or people may talk sh*t. Coworkers are jealous as f**k. But you have to remember you and your work ethic deserve to be recognized; you work so hard after all. Maybe reward yourself something every time you’re recognized? That way you can associate that with another feeling.
omg it’s so frustrating to see horrible employees get away with everything and bad employees get praised meanwhile i’m over here doing 20,000 steps a day bc im running around so much lolol
i def don’t learn the conventional way. i instantly feel pressured and looked at. i’m best learning it by trying on my own. well at least at my work i am bc there’s never been a proper instructor for anything lol so you’re basically being trained by coworkers and it feels more like they are talking down to you. idk maybe it’s just me letting myself feel dumb and small.
I’m so sorry you were being lied to for a year plus. Some people are really *** and don’t need to be in relationships. It’s a simple ask to not cheat and be honest.
You cannot worry about or compare how happy she may be this holiday. Her current actions should not affect your present or future. Karma may take awhile. But in the meantime, focus on YOU.
Are you ready to start dating again? Do you think you’ve fully healed? Are you wanting a serious relationship or a fling? Are you just wanting a partner/relationship to fill a void in your life right now? Are you looking for mutal companionship or just wanting to feel needed?
i think i was being lied to the whole time. it rly sucks looking back on it. i shouldn’t. i’m currently doing better and if i can keep my emotions in check at work my future will be like a dream for the old me
idk if im ready to start dating again. emotionally i think i might be. i’ve been enjoying being social with people at work. i even got flirted with a couple times at the store lol but i got in my own head and become scared to talk. that’s def a big hindrance with meeting girls lolol so i got that holding me back and a couple other things i wanna fix about myself. my friend tells my im overthinking it and im good and girls will like me. but after everything that’s happened my confidence is shot and i feel like a loser
i feel like a lot of my vulnerabilities and insecurities are really minor things and honestly some support and encouragement would fix me right up.
it’s like i need the girl to fix the problem but i can’t get the girl until i fix the problem lolol