Ramblings 3
Nothing new, same issues . I miss the people here. I have been really struggling the last few months. I have been really trying and it seems like I am going back instead of forward.
@Tinywhisper11
I am sorry for not being here for you. You are in my thoughts, ❤️ I am still not in a good place. I have no hope anymore regarding myself. But for you and everyone else here I do. I honestly don’t know what I am doing minute to minute much less the future. I have no desire to write here anymore, however I feel a responsibility to all of you here, especially you. ❤️❤️❤️ I love you, I still am holding my hug even though it may feel a bit shaky right now ❤️❤️❤️
I can’t even express how sorry I feel for what you are going through. Please continue writing here and do not give up. You might not feel it but you are needed here and in your physical life. I believe the universe gave us all a role to play in life even if we are sometimes not sure what it is. Thank you for caring and feeling responsible to people here, we care for you! 💙.
@amiablePeace77
Friend - it's OK. I see you and others also in movies use the word "universe". I wonder so much who this "universe" is.
@Helgafy
We have all different opinions about what God, the Universe or similar beliefs are. For me the universe is a power higher than me. The universe offers us ways to come together, to love and embrace each other without judgment, it shows us ways in mindfulness to be peaceful, kind and how to protect ourselves but the universe does not solve our problems - it shows directions, and we need to open our hearts to see them.
@amiablePeace77
Hi. Hi. For me it is good that I know the Creator, God, Jesus Christ - not an unpersonal power as the "universe", but a personal power that can see, think, love.
@Helgafy
Nice that you found the anchor that helps you in life!
@amiablePeace77
Thank you ami. And I still have to say; I don't understand why people worship the creation and not the Creator. For me it is like saying - oh - that painting made itself. Why not accept there is an artist behind the painting/creation.
@amiablePeace77
Thank you.
I appreciate your sentiments, I am accepting of everything that you have said except for one part of it. The words regarding my being needed here just doesn’t register as realistic to me.
I know I am not needed in my physical life. I have been off work and bedridden for over two months, nobody has tried to visit me or contact me regarding how I am doing. I struggle to get to the mailbox or throw trash in my dumpster, or periodically start my truck , and I am literally hobbled over in extreme pain and the local people just drive on by. Yes I am a hermit. Which is also proof in my eyes that I am not needed or cared about in my physical life. I have to pay those people who pick up and deliver my medication. I have to pay the people driving me to my surgeon appointments and then surgery.
I may be missed for a few seconds when I pass on, but that will be all and then it’ll be business as usual.
Here , I possibly will be missed a few moments longer.
That’s the life I have led and I am the only one to blame for that.
Thank you, I do appreciate your support and kindness. ❤️
@Iamwhoiamwhoami
We never know how much we help others by making posts or sending messages, never know how much someone really benefits from it for their own life. You and everyone else here might make a much bigger impact than thought. This is my belief, but it might not be the belief of others.
@Iamwhoiamwhoami
Pardon me;
You most certainly are needed and need to learn to love yourself again ❤️ care for all your needs and recluse if being around people is uncomfortable. I have a few friends like that and one just wouldn't take a hint that I needed space so I've ignored his calls a couple of days because he tries to get me to explain things. He triggers me, he is a war hardened Marine, and I am dealing with bad PTSD and need my alone time so I can focus. One day at a time. The other day I made my bed and it still looks good. I cut my hair and for some reason I always feel so much better after I clean up and trim. Keep your head up. From what I read about it seems you most likely are in a manic state, so try to slow it down and take a few deep breaths. We are all here for you!! Think positive thoughts and make a 3 or 4 item to do list, then do #1
We all go through it and then the clouds clear and the sun shines brightly again. Looking back you will always give yourself credit and a sense of accomplishment. Smiling creates endorphins that make you smile for real!!
Ttys, Day 🤗
@Iamwhoiamwhoami
Iam.
At 7cups you can have as many onlinefriends (listeners) as you want to. I hope you find a good onlinefriend with the listener you have now.
@Iamwhoiamwhoami just keep posting so we know you are okay.
The only failure is quitting.
@soulsings
Hi soul - I have been quitting - and guess what happened - nothing.
@Iamwhoiamwhoami it's ok angel, take your time ❤ just know we are all here for you, when you are ready ❤ I'm always hugging you too, and steadying your shakey hug ❤ hopefully in a few days, you'll feel a bit better, maybe the fight in you will come back. When we finally meet, the first thing we are gonna do, is go sit by the seaside, eat icecream, and watch the sunset. You can pick the second thing? 😁 hugs you tightly, keeps you close to my heart ❤ I love you ❤
@Tinywhisper11
Thank you ❤️❤️. When we finally meet, I will be perfectly happy with being wherever you want to be, as long as I am with you that would be the near perfect experience, the only thing lacking would be all of the other people that we have been blessed to have in our lives here being with us as well. ❤️❤️❤️❤️ But to be completely honest, the first time we meet I want it to be you, me and your caregivers. I know that is selfish of me. Part of that is my anxieties, the other part is that we could get to know each other better and enjoy the experiences together with minimal distractions. ❤️❤️❤️❤️
💕💕💕💕. I love you, I think a little strength is coming back in my embrace 💕💕💕💕
@Iamwhoiamwhoami awwww you really are the sweetest angel alive ❤❤
@Iamwhoiamwhoami when all hope is gone, let love carry you through
@Tinywhisper11
❤️❤️Still maintaining hug, I love you ❤️ ❤️ I hope you are doing better. You’re still in my thoughts, regardless of my personal status.
@Iamwhoiamwhoami together forever no matter what happens ❤❤ hugs you tightly back ❤🙂 you know I have 2 angels by my side, Joshua (my son) and you, my chosen family, and fear friend ❤ me and you together can overcome all theese obstacles ❤ but for now, it's ok to go through the emotions, to feel defeated. I understand how upsetting and hard life can be. But I'm here for you ❤ ❤❤
@Iamwhoiamwhoami
@Iamwhoiamwhoami I kinda left it to the last minute to let you know I won't be around for a few days, but don't worry I'll be back, as soon as I can ❤ nothing to worry about you just focus on getting yourself better ❤ I'm still gonna be hugging you and holding your hand, the whole time ❤ I love you ❤
@Tinywhisper11
It’s not like I have been here for you to tell me anything.
I’m guessing surgery? ❤️❤️❤️Hopefully everything goes better than expected ❤️❤️❤️
Even though I am in the mindset that I am, and my strength is weak, ❤️❤️❤️❤️I still hold you in my arms ( I have superglued my hands together to make sure that I never let you go) , I love you ❤️❤️❤️❤️.
You are in my thoughts regularly as well as the others. I just can’t bring myself to write here. I did turn sound back up so I can hear if someone leaves a message, unless I am sleeping I should hear it if it is sent to me. I will probably come and read it but probably not respond . I’m sorry.
@Tinywhisper11
I hope your surgery goes beyond smoothly, I hope that your recovery goes great, and that your pain continues to diminish to the level of zero pain. You are always in my thoughts no matter what I am dealing with mentally and/or physically, you always will be. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️I Love You and continue to embrace you. ❤️❤️❤️❤️💕💕💕
I am sorry for failing Tiny and not struggling through and being here for her strongly like I should’ve. I failed her. I am sorry.
@Iamwhoiamwhoami You haven't failed anyone Iam. Sometimes we're all going through our own personal h*lls and can't be there for everyone. I think Tiny knows and understands this. More importantly I think it the fact that she knows you care about her and that she's in your thoughts ❤️
@Iamwhoiamwhoami yep! Soul was right ❤ soul and me think alike😁 I'm just honoured to know you care about me ❤🙂 it's ok you don't have to answer anyones message, you take your time. Maybe just hearing our messages for now, that way we know your still with us ❤
operation went ok, I'm in a lot of pain, stuck on 2 drips. Curtains closed around me so I can't see anyone. I hate hospitals I get so nervous and scared at every little sound. But the worst thing is, I'm sooooooo borrreeddd here🙁 so if you and soul, could come and sneak me out of the hospital that will be great😁
I love you ❤
@Tinywhisper11
Of course we will, where you go, we go.
❤️❤️❤️❤️forever together, I love you, my embrace is forever around you.❤️❤️❤️❤️. I dislike hospitals as well. Continue to get better, we all are patiently waiting by your side.
@Iamwhoiamwhoami So what do we need to break someone out of the hospital? 😁
@mytwistedsoul
Probably have to roll her out after they gave her some sleep meds, otherwise she’ll give it all away by laughing the whole way out. 😆
@Iamwhoiamwhoami @mytwistedsoul 😂😂😂😂 I can't sleep, people are snoring!!!!! Someone sounds like a donkey, I hate hospitals. Your just gonna have to roll me out laughing, use duct tape or something😂😂😂😂😂
@Tinywhisper11
The snoring might be me……😴💤
@Iamwhoiamwhoami 😂😂😂😂😂 you sound like a donkey too??? 😂😂😂 I don't generally mind snoring, I just really we to go home. And little things are peeing me off
@Tinywhisper11 Crow like a rooster maybe the donkey will wake up 😂
@Iamwhoiamwhoami ok I informed everyone at cups that I'm ok ❤ now it's sleepy time ❤❤ hugs you tightly ❤❤ goodnight angel ❤ I'll try write to you again tommorow🙂❤
@Tinywhisper11
❤️❤️❤️Sweet dreams, I love you ❤️❤️❤️
