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Ramblings 3

Iamwhoiamwhoami December 31st, 2023

Nothing new, same issues . I miss the people here. I have been really struggling the last few months. I have been really trying and it seems like I am going back instead of forward.

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mytwistedsoul September 17th

@Tinywhisper11 Hey you ❤️ It's nice to see you back

2 replies
Tinywhisper11 September 17th

@mytwistedsoul hi soul ❤❤ thanks, I'm gonna try be here when I'm well enough to🙂 ❤ so your the other person iam was talking about missing me🙂 how are you sweetie??

1 reply
mytwistedsoul September 17th

@Tinywhisper11 You take your time and get better ok? ❤️ Oh I was one of many I'm sure 😊 You're a big presence so when you're not here it's definitely noticed ❤️ *hugs you gently and sends healing vibes* 

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Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 17th

I feel like I want to shout from the rooftops to all of her friends that she is ok but still struggling, but that is her news to share.

5 replies
Tinywhisper11 September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami you carry on😂😂 but you know there's this invention called phones😂😂😂😂😂

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Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 18th

But I don’t know all of your friends names and phone numbers.

3 replies
Tinywhisper11 September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami 😂😂😂 I don't have a phone, and all my friends are on this site ❤😁

2 replies
Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 18th

@Tinywhisper11

A phone is used for calling, a computer is for internet stuff. So how do you propose I go about doing that then?❤️❤️❤️❤️

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Tinywhisper11 September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 yep! Ok so we are in agreement, we will just shout it from the roof tops😂😂😂

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Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 17th

@Helgafy

I heard from Tiny , she is alive but still very ill. She is now paralyzed on one side. They are planning spine surgery.

The young woman can’t seem to catch a break.

I was trying to bite my tongue and not shout it out at the highest mountain peak, because it is her story to tell. But I think she would be ok with my bringing it up here in this bit of writings, to the few who come back here a little bit and all love Tiny and only wish her the best . I think Twist and a couple others have already been here and found out about Tiny. I haven’t heard from you today, so I thought you would like to know.

I truly hope you’re doing ok, … you’re in my thoughts as well..

2 replies
Tinywhisper11 September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami ❤❤❤ hi Helga ❤ don't worry I'm ok ❤

Helgafy September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami

Friend - yesterday my brother was visiting me. He comes once pr. week with groceries and we talk for 2 hours. Then I don't write here so much. And yes - we're all very relieved about hearing something from Tiny and we shout from the roof of the houses - "Listen - Tiny has said hello!" She's suffering (as you also do) so hard and we don't like that at all. We bless her in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. There has been a periode of warmer days here. So red, yellow and light pink roses are at my terrassegarden. Can you please pick them and hand them over to @Tinywhisper11. I think you can express your heart's feelings by doing that. And I know @mytwistedsoul will bring her his homemade icecream. If she don't want to eat it now I'm sure the home where she lives has a freezer so that she can eat it later. I lift you all up to our Father in heavens place.

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Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 17th

I am confused, I am elated that Tiny is still with us, but I am feeling scared and anxious about what the near future holds in store for her, much less the long term. She has been the so much, and still continues to fight.

I am confused because I am feeling an extreme range of ?emotions? at the same time. In addition to those regarding Tiny, I still struggle in my darkness and everything that goes along with it.

However my feelings don’t matter. All that matters is Tiny and her well being.

10 replies
amiablePeace77 September 17th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami

It can be very hard to hear what others have been through and are still going through but please never forget that you matter too and that there is support for you here 💙

3 replies
Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 17th

Thank you

Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 17th

@amiablepeace77

Thank you

Tinywhisper11 September 18th

@amiablePeace77 yes that's right. Iam I love you ❤ and I want to help you, so many others do to ❤

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BlueDarkAurora September 17th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami Both of your feelings matter just as much. But I think that's what it is to love someone, they come first ^-^ I'm glad you both get to share this beautiful bond. 

1 reply
Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 17th

@BlueDarkAurora

Thank you

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Tinywhisper11 September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami I'll be back soon ❤

3 replies
Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 18th

@Tinywhisper11

I will be here waiting with bells on ❤️❤️

2 replies
Tinywhisper11 September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami sorry I was gone for so long, I'm in a lot of pain and things take forever to do right now. It's hard only being able to move your arm and head. But sweetie, I'm going to be ok, after the surgery I'll be back to speeding around theese hallways😁❤ you must remember you have also been through so much, and we are here for each other ❤



1 reply
Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 18th

@Tinywhisper11

No apologies needed. You have an extremely difficult situation to try and navigate. ❤️❤️As long as hands are held and love is pure, we shall persevere ❤️❤️

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Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 18th

34 hours until my ride to surgeon consultation appointment.

Anxiety bubbling over, my anxiety is more addressed to the ride than the appointment. Hopefully meds kick in and I’m pain free. I doubt it but who knows.

7 replies
mytwistedsoul September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami Is it a long ride to the there? Would a pillow help? Maybe to have behind your back or to sit on? Would you be able to lay on the back seat? 

6 replies
Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 18th

@mytwistedsoul

I was actually wondering about trailering my mattress to the appointment.

I have thought the same options.

I am thinking of taking a pillow, it kind of depends what vehicle they use. Most vehicles I can’t stretch out in ,

The discs are pushing on nerve roots in the lower back and anything pushing on that area wrong creates issues, I have various cushions that I could use, but I tried those in my wheelchair and they made the issue worse for the short term. We are thinking the same but what I have tried

here is only aggravating things and that is minus the bumps and such from the road travel, gravel and pavement.

I think a pillow if I can lay in the backseat somehow.

But other than that I’m at the mercy of the slight tweak with my pain and nerve meds that my doctor did. Nerve medication goes from 2 times a day to 3 and the oxycodone is doubled for the ride down and again for the ride back, plus I have another for muscle spasms.

Thank you for your suggestions, always appreciate your ideas

5 replies
mytwistedsoul September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami It sucks when nothing helps with the pain. Yeah I can see that plows might make it work because they would push on spots that would make the pain worse. Road conditions definitely wouldn't help much either. Hopefully they have an SUV or something similar. If you sit in the front passenger seat would laying the seat back as far as possible help? Man I hope the double dose helps you get there as painlessly as possible

1 reply
Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 18th

@mytwistedsoul

I will have to try and figure out something when they get here. This is new territory for me as far as this situation. I will probably be all over those seats trying to minimize pain like a sugar rushed toddler let loose.

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Tinywhisper11 September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami travelling in pain is a really worrying thing🙁 there's this pillow you can buy, it's a donut shape, but where the tail bone is it has no pressure, it really helps. But I didn't think about it till now, sorry😕 hopefully with double meds, it will help you a bit ❤

2 replies
Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 18th

@Tinywhisper11

I actually have a few of those, I tried them in the wheelchair and they made things worse.

I already had a tailbone at a 90 degrees angle on my spine. Those pillows didn’t work for that either.

Normal cures don’t work for me.

1 reply
Tinywhisper11 September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami that's because your like me 😁 unique and special 

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Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 18th

Just tried to do the previsit paperwork (online). It wouldn’t verify my insurance because two things were not on the card.

I wonder how much of a hassle it will be when I get there?

2 replies
mytwistedsoul September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami It'll probably be easier for them to fill out tbh. They have their own connections and contacts to find out insurance stuff. They deal with it every day I bet

1 reply
Tinywhisper11 September 18th

@mytwistedsoul oh that's good, if the surgeon complete the form. But I have no idea about theese things. Don't worry iam it'll all be ok ❤

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Tinywhisper11 September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami other than worried about the pain travelling there, are you scared of nervous at all??

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Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 18th

@Tinywhisper11

I am all kinds of nervous, I have been through a lot but this kind of surgery is scary.

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Tinywhisper11 September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami I'm sorry I'll continue reading all the stuff I missed as soon as I can ❤❤ hugs you tightly ❤I love you ❤

1 reply
Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 18th

@Tinywhisper11

No worries, rest up, and do whatever you need to do for you. ❤️❤️❤️❤️Gentle hugs, love transferred between ❤️❤️❤️❤️. ❤️❤️ I love you too ❤️❤️

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Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 18th

@Tinywhisper11

If you happen to come back here I n the next several hours and I don’t respond I am probably sleeping or having a brain flicker. ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Iamwhoiamwhoami OP September 18th

Not that it’s any kind of important but my background noise machine (television) decided it had enough. So I had to make the decision to spend precious funds on something not related to getting by to keep some background noise in play. The background noise helps a little to mellow everything out.

As simple as they make them to set up, it took me about three hours to unbox and setup a makeshift stand using some of those empty totes I bought. My old one is hanging from a ceiling mount, so that one is not getting swapped any time soon.

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Tinywhisper11 September 18th

@Iamwhoiamwhoami agreed background noise is a need. So money well spent, and well done for getting it set up ❤ I have music constantly playing ❤

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