Why do I keep going back to my toxic relationship?

Something addictive is something toxic, isn't it? There are many reasons why we cannot leave addictions behind: we "think" we need them to survive, our brain wants them desperately even when sometimes very deep inside us we know they are not good for us. In toxic relations, the addition is that the other person may keep making promises he/she will change but then does not. We get used to that relation, and since we are also intoxicated, we cannot accept a change. There are times when our toxic relations are a complement to our own toxicity, and our system will not allow a separation. Other times, we just keep there because we are afraid of the change.

From a psychological perspective, it is likely that your significant other in the relationship has manipulated you and changed the way that you think about yourself. This is a common abuse tactic because it can make you feel like you are worthless and need this other person in order to survive. This toxic relationship feels comfortable with you, even though you know it's toxic, simply because it is what you are used to. I would suggest going to therapy, as a therapist can help you to notice your unhealthy habits and change them. This is an important thing to do because you are especially likely to end up in another toxic relationship after having already been in one.

Sometimes we go back to a toxic relationship because we love the person dearly but also, sometimes we don't miss the relationship, we miss the routine or the connection and time we spend with a person. We may know that the relationship isn't good for us yet we keep going back because we feel like we need the person in our lives or you feel like you can't handle being without them. Once you learn to start having a new routine and spend time with different people, you will eventually be able to stop going back to that toxic relationship.

Honestly you probably go back because they promise to change, they spend some time acting like the perfect person and makes you think they will change, You need some time out, you need to think about this before going back, how many times have you been back and how many times have you been hurt, I wont lie, it will hurt walking away however in the long run this will be good for you and you will realize you are worth so much more.

That's a valid feeling, because attachment is hard to break after a long period of time. Sometimes you'll feel like you owe them, or that you might not find anyone else, but believe me you will. There is so much more outside that toxicity, and we are here to help you on your journey to find it.

Sometime we get caught up in toxic relationships due to trauma bonding or codependentancy... we need to really take time to learn and understand what it is we are seeking or trying to get ... moving forward can be scary. Change is scary. Life is hard, however if we can at least be aware of trauma bonding and want change we can learn and change.

It is hard to leave someone that you have developed feelings for. Most people go back to toxic relationships because they think 1.) I still love them and we need to try 2.) The other party still loves me and doesnt mean their actions and 3.) You are used to the abuse. You need to understand that this is not love, nothing will change, and you need to move on for yourself and your own happiness 😇😇😘

You obviously think that it’s going to be different every time you go back and you enjoy the feeling you have when you’re with that person but it’s not healthy

We believe that they will change if we continue to give them a second chance and things will turn out differently

Because we think they're going to change. We keep on hoping for a change. Also, we know that every bad person has also a good side. And we know their good site. And if you think about their good sites and maybe the most beautiful experiences with them, you keep on hoping to experience their good site once again.

You could have a sense of lack of self worth and so you go back to the person that showed a variation of acceptance to your character.

Sometimes it is difficult for us to say no or get rid of someone who has been a major part of your lives or been there with us for quite a long time. Perhaps you've been with/around them for so long that you don't recall what it is like without them and when you are not with them you wonder what to do

It is for you to realize if it is true love or dependance what makes you go back into it, however, the fact that you do acknowledge that this is a toxic relationship indicates that you can do something about that; it is hard to tell if a person can or is willing to change and nobody has the right to push someone into changing a behaviour, but you can always do something about yourself, and by some subtle means you could work both on yourself and the relationship, helping the other person indirectly as well.

Because it is the relationship you have been used to. It is scary to finally go out and have new experiences. In the beginning it will be scary but over time you will see that it is worth the try

I feel that we go back to toxic relationships because we like security and everyone is restrictive and avoids change, we feel the next is going to be worst so we stick to what we have . Furthermore the partner in a toxic relationship is often controlling thus we follow what they say its like being stuck in a web where you feel you cannot do without them

Because sometimes we feel alone and would rather be with someone than alone. and going back to someone who use to make you happy seems to be the answer, but does it make it right for you no, you need remember life is to short, there is bigger and brighter things out there ahead of you,

There are many reasons, although fear and insecurity are the biggest two. When contemplating whether to leave a relationship or not, fear often kicks in. Questions surface like will I ever find love again? What if I end up alone forever? These questions ignite fear. Common fears include being alone, being single and not being able to find a someone who treats you well. These ideas create a spiral of negative and catastrophic thinking which makes it even more difficult to leave an unhealthy relationship. By recognizing that your relationship is toxic and no longer denying it, it is common to feel empowered to take action.

You find the need for a relationship or someone to "love " you and you trick yourself into thinking it is right

Maybe you miss the physical affection...but dont worry! That's okay, everyone's experienced that at least once. Try to forget them, burn pictures and delete chats and work on realizing how bad they really are... this will help you realize and keep yourself from getting hurt over and over... trust me I've been the same situation, I know how hard it must be... but dont worry you'll get trough this.. we can set up daily meetings and I can help you get through this step by step and day by day...if that's what you'd want of cours. :) How are you feeling ?

Hi there friend! I can actually speak personally on this. We go back to toxic relationships for a number of reasons. A big one is because it is familiar. We as humans want to feel comfortable. And so we go back to things that we know and are used to even if they are bad for us. Another big reason is love. Often we love the person even though they are toxic and we so desperately want to fixed it and be loved back the way we love them. Especially if they were way different in the beginning. It's confusing when they go from treating you from good to bad. A term often referred to as "love bombing". But its important to know that you should never stay in toxic relationships no matter what reasons you have. Better things will come. Me personally I went from a horrible toxic relationship that was painfully one sided to a man who finally treats me with all of the love and respect that I deserve and more. Don't ever settle for less. And remember it's better to single and happy then in a relationship and miserable. It took me my whole life to learn that very hard lesson. There's so much joy in life, don't let anyone take it away from you. I'm here if anyone wants to talk! Much love! :)

Sometimes, you keep going back to a toxic relationship because you don't know what it's like for a relationship to not be toxic. You also convince yourself that maybe you deserve whatever is happening to you in the relationship. Or maybe it's the only way you can feel something and you end up mistaking the toxicity for love. It's completely valid. But please put yourself and your mental health first. You're not weak for going back to a toxic relationship. In fact, it shows your strength in being able to endure it over and over again. However, everyone has a breaking point. You need to critically analyse your relationships and attempt to make them healthier so no one gets hurt. And remember, even when you love each other, it's okay to let go if it becomes toxic, you won't be a bad person for doing so.

Believe me I did this to. It’s mood because you’re a kind person and you want to be with the other. If you’re really in love with this person but it’s toxic maybe it’s time for you to leave or talking over with the other. How much trouble will go through and you will thank me later when you get out of that relationship don’t keep going back if it’s it’s toxic no matter what go back you need to stop immediately and go get real help or just follow my advice and leave the other

After a few months, I realised that losing you wasn’t really a loss. Losing you made sense. Losing you was inevitable. I lost you because I never really had you. You were never really mine, you were always searching for something away from me you were always thinking of someone else when you were with me. I lost you because I would’ve lost who I was if I held onto you. I lost you to find myself. See, I learned that it’s better to lose some people than to hold on to the hope of them coming back, because a person who doesn’t want to lose you, will never let you slip away. But you didn’t fight. You didn’t try. And in turn, you made my decision for me. You made it easier for me to think of losing you as another way to find myself another way to save myself. And for the first time, you made me realise that not every person you lose is a loss and that losing can sometimes be winning. For the first time, you made me realise that losing someone is sometimes the only way to love yourself. For the first time, you made me realise there is so much more to be found in losing someone who was never meant to stay. Losing you was hard, but keeping you was harder. Losing you was a lesson but not a loss. Losing you was my favourite win.

I guess because is toxic and creates you a dependence. The best is trying to work on making your personality stronger and try to live a happy life on your own before being attached to a relationship.

Because you are a caring, considerate person, who likes to see the best in everything. You don't like to give up, especially on something you love so dearly. That's okay, because that shows resilience and loyalty, You don't run away when times get tough. The problem is that you're not showing this care and consideration to yourself, and if it's toxic, the other person isn't showing it to you, and possibly towards themselves too. They take your good nature for granted. They feel that you will always be there for them no matter what...until one day, you aren't. It isn't because you don't want to be, because once you love someone, that's it, you can't undo it. Its because you've reached your limit, you've given all that you could and now you're empty, and have little to give. Your tolerance levels waver, and soon it all becomes your fault because you allowed it before, and now you're not allowing it.

Because it's hard to move on from one person whom you've loved with all your heart as you werent aware of how the relationship would turn out to be but since you love them, you keep focusing on the good side of the relationship which makes you always go back even if it hurts you. Just like a moth and fire.

I find that when I love someone I give chances time and time again because we fall in love with the idea of what could be and not what is. That’s a hard thing to accept for anyone. We all want this ideal image that we create for what could be that we accept the things we know we don’t deserve in front of us to try and get to that place without realizing that might never happen. Sometimes we accept what we think we deserve and put up with it instead of continuing to search for more, really .

In my past I kept on going back to my toxic ex to feel love. I have found I search for acceptance where I have been rejected. I have peers that love me and it's hard to accept that love unless everyone likes me is how I viewed it in my past. I know now that not everyone will like me and that is okay. It's healthy to let go of the past to make a new normal. My ex used to come back in my life and waffle between another woman and myself. It hurt but once I finally realized it's not healthy and that I need to find someone that loves me for me and not the idea of me, it was really healing.

I think you might feel terrible about going back to your toxic relationship, I did the same few years ago. I guess it is just our love for the other person that even if we cannot totally forgive them we find reasons and excuses to justify their actions, that what bad they did to us is not more than the love we share. I realized it after a long time I shouldn't be justifying something toxic and deep beneath I knew, my instincts told me that I was doing wrong but we still do it regardless of thinking about ourselves. I think one more reason that we go back to our toxic relationship is we never loved ourselves enough or we were never loved the right way so we accept whatever comes to us named as love, we are supposed to be loved the right way everyone deserves that. We just need to realize our worth to take up the courage and walk away from what is not good for us.

I was in an abusive relationship for 3 years but kept constantly going back because I felt as though he was all I deserved and that maybe things could change and so on even if they never would. It is not uncommon but with time, realizations will eventually arise and you will learn to be without this person and see that there is better for you.