@IsayUncle
I am taking a social media break for the month of October and was wondering how to safely and mindfully reintroduce social media after the break.
Why I wanted to do this break: I was noticing that I was distracted by constant notifications, so I really narrowed those down and removed notifications for most people and apps. I want to use social media socially, not for the notifications of Likes, so I prioritized messages from people I knew and instead of using my usual scrolling habit, I sought out places like 7 Cups and the support servers of *** to talk to people and share my feelings. I want to replace my parasocial relationships with actual interactions. :) Even though it's less intimidating than IRL, I still have social anxiety with replying at times!
What I want to implement after the break: I want to implement time limits for each app, so I know I'm going into the social media app intentionally ("I want to check in with this follower and have a small chat" not "Idk I just need to scroll..."). This will allow me more awareness of what social media is providing. I'm a firm believer that maladaptive coping skills are STILL helpful for something, so that core issue needs to be addressed for any replacement coping skills to last long-term. For example I have noticed that when I feel lonely while at home I have used *** for hours and hours just to hear someone's voice. Feeling lonely is a valid thing to need to comfort myself for, so what could better coping with loneliness look like? This is also something to implement: regular social engagement with others that are truly supportive and I feel comforted and restored afterward. I can: go to bed earlier so I can wake up earlier and spend time with bf before he leaves for work, I can join Zoom meetings for topics of interest, and I can ask for a listener on 7 Cups or elsewhere when I need an individual to listen.
What I noticed I struggled with perhaps the most is how doomscrolling has impacted my self view and worldview. It makes sense that I would believe I am ugly - if all I do is look at people I see as more attractive and listen to makeup/procedure/fashion advice. It makes sense that I would believe the world is a scary place not worth my time - again, if all I do is look at horrible news and expose myself to constant wars and violence that I, reasonably, cannot simply end myself.
This break has given me time to explore things I really value, like losing weight slowly for my cholesterol and mobility rather than rapidly for vanity. Also, I may not be able to emotionally handle or politically invest in things like donation requests, war in other countries, etc. What I can do is take a more local approach for things I am passionate for: housing safety, building safety, anything the EPA would cover, environmental law, regulations around waste disposal, hazards like mold, asbestos, or lead... This is also important for my career path!!
I've also had time to reconnect with my own interests such as theology. Instead of seeing a lot of posts that are both harmful to me: "God hates you for being queer" or "Religion is inherently queerphobic" etc. I am able to explore my own relationship with God/Christianity/spirituality on my terms. Joining a queer Christian group has also been very helpful because it provides me with a space to discuss how these posts harm me without judgement.
By no means do I want to shame myself or others with how much social media they use (or people interested in international politics!! I salute you the same way I do EMTs- I just can't do it myself). This is all my own opinion and goals. :) Being disabled means I spend more time at home, so social media is very valuable for me to use regularly to stay in touch with people such as those with similar disabilities that may not live nearby. But it's also very valuable to take breaks and reflect on my usage. 😃
