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Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #8) When you don't get the role you want

Heather225 August 27th, 2020

Please note: In order to successfully complete Course 2, you must respond to this post. Your comment/response should answer the questions/shows that you completed the given activity (if any). Read the post carefully and follow the instructions given. Save your responses to a document that you can later refer to. You will need to copy/paste your response in the course evaluation form at the end of each course to show that you have done the work and to refresh your memory.
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Hello, students! Let's talk leadership!

Many of you have or will apply for certain roles that interest you! And some times we get it and some times we don't! It can be difficult to find out that we didn't get the role, but we can control how we react to it.

Here are some DOs and DON'Ts:

- DO talk to the leader of the role that you applied for and get some input on what you can/need to do in order to get the role next time! Be aware though most leaders of these roles are busy so give it some time!

- DON'T bring the issue into the support rooms. If you are upset, talking to a peer supporter about how you are feeling is ok!

- DO take some self-care, self-care is good for any occasion but its best to deal with those feelings of failure or disappointment outside of 7 cups, things like going on your member account can be so helpful to overcome some of these feelings

- DON'T think that you are obligated to stay on 7 cups right after finding out bad news, especially if you are in LSR/TL and you see other listeners who have gotten the role that you wanted! It can be hard to deal with and it can cause unneeded jealousy or hurt on your part! Not everyone is like this but if you think that this is a possibility that you can think this way staying away might be a great option!

- DON'T take it personally, everyone is ready at different times. It can be hard for us to realize this but just because someone got the role and they might have been here in less or the same amount of time doesn't mean that you personally are ready! Everyone grows and accomplishes things at different times!

- DO get a mentor, in general its a good idea to get a mentor but for things like your goals on 7 cups mentors can be great and helpful! They can give you feedback, do mock chats with you, and overall help you with your goals as I said before!

- DON'T think you have to apply for every role and every team out there! There is time you don't have to apply for everything! Its super easy to burnout that way, and that can lead to more "rejection" and hurt that none of us want!

*Never let not getting a role the first time discourage you! You will be told when you can apply again and use the feedback that you get to better yourself when you can/decide that you are ready to! practice makes perfect none for us are perfect and no one will ever be! Its a good thing to remember no matter your role as a listener your help is greatly appreciated and you are still helping so many people!*

Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

Activity: Please reply to 3 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!

After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next post here! You must take part in the brainstorming/activities given in all of these posts to successfully complete the program.


This post is brought to you by the Leadership Development Program Team, find out more information about the program here.

922
yourfriend5 October 8th, 2021

@Heather225

Good learning

JoyHappyNess October 17th, 2021

@Heather225

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond?


Take some self- care and process the feelings of disappointment. This can be done by logging out of your listener account first.


What would you say to the leader who has informed you?


You could start by thanking them for giving you the information then ask them on ways to improve yourself so that you can be better suited if you want to reapply for the role.

1 reply
LavenderFlower October 26th, 2021

@JoyHappyNess

Yes, self-care is so important. To provide and accept situations, we have to be kind to ourselves. Feedback does not mean we failed. It's our cue to get up and try again. Great response

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Textingpals October 17th, 2021

@Heather225

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

Ans: My response to the leader: "Hello, @username! Thank you for taking a minute out of your schedule to let me know that. I understand I am not the right fit for the role currently. However, I would like to ask if I could help with any related role or anything. Additionally, please let me know where I can improve myself, feel free to add any tips if you would like. Thank you."

After the natural dejected feeling, I would like to talk to a Peer Supporter, if it continues for a long time. I might also take a small self-care break, go for a walk or do something that makes me cheer up. Connecting with a mentor after I receive the feedback is another such thing that I would like to do.

1 reply
LavenderFlower October 26th, 2021

@Textingpals

I love the response you wrote out! It's so professional and shows your desire to improve to the mentor and community

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Moonlemon48 October 20th, 2021

@Heather225

1.After getting over the possible emotions of not getting the role, I would ask the leader where I went wrong and ask for a feedback.

2. Thank you for taking out your time and giving me this opportunity, I realize there are some things I can do better and improve on and I will soon consider re applying for the role after I've improved.

1 reply
jersey123456 October 22nd, 2021

@Moonlemon48

Great Response !

xinyii11 November 9th, 2021

@Moonlemon48 Love your response! Asking for feedback really is important to improve ourselves in the future <33

mikacv December 14th, 2021

@Moonlemon48


I like how you would thank the leader for the opportunity to even apply even if you didn't get the role. It shows professionalism and maturity!

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jersey123456 October 22nd, 2021

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

I will be sad and disappointed but will work towards improving myself.

I will thank the leader for informing me and be grateful and ask them to give feedback which would help me improve myself.

1 reply
LavenderFlower October 26th, 2021

@jersey123456

It is great you want to choose to focus on improvement. You will definitely be able to improve your leadership skills and provide great support!

CaringEzra February 14th, 2022

I agree that I would be disappointed in myself but it’s awesome that you focus on how to improve

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LavenderFlower October 26th, 2021

@Heather225

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond?
I would definitely be upset, but I should remain calm and think about improvement rather than focusing on the issue as if all it is is a failure. Rather, it is a learning experience

What would you say to the leader who has informed you?
I will ask for feedback and accept the criticisms that I have received so that I can apply at a later date when I am better prepared

1 reply
lyricalSea85 November 5th, 2021

@LavenderFlower

Failure can sometimes be inevitable. I love how you're willing to consider failure as a learning experience.

xinyii11 November 9th, 2021

@LavenderFlower Totally valid! I would honestly feel the same too <3

mikacv December 14th, 2021

@LavenderFlower


I agree! I would be upset too, but all good and bad news can be a learning experience. It's good to ask for feedback (:

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xinyii11 November 9th, 2021

If I don't get the role I want, I would definitely be disappointed. However, I'll know that I still have much room for improvement and would try my best to improve my existing weaknesses. I should try to respond politely and positively instead of blaming myself about not getting the role. I should also know that I tried my best and whatever happens happens. As for what I would tell the leader informing me of the decision, I will firstly thank them for delivering the news. I will also ask them for feedback and suggestions on how I could be a better listener/leader in the future.

1 reply
mikacv December 14th, 2021

@xinyii11

Improvement is always important and it's great that you would approach this as a teaching moment and take it on as an opportunity to evaluate your weaknesses!

Kindwords2000 January 7th, 2022

@xinyii11

It is only natural to be disappointed, it is what you do with the feedback and think about what your next steps are. You are very right.

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mikacv December 14th, 2021

@Heather225

Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

If I found out I was not given the role I wanted, I would remain calm and try not to take it personally. I would not lash out or have any angst toward any leaders/listeners/members/organization about the bad news. I would thank the leader who informed me and would maybe ask what other roles might be a better fit for me, if any, and how I can improve to work toward the goal of the role I initially wanted. Feedback is always important, whether it is good or bad.

1 reply
Kindwords2000 January 7th, 2022

@mikacv

That is the right approach to take, it is natural to be disappointed but it was you do after that is important.

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DancingHeart4982 December 18th, 2021

@Heather225

I will be definitely disappointed to be honest. Something similar happened to me when I messed up active listening 3. I got a feedback on how I did and I can answer these questions better. I was quite disappointed. I told her how I misunderstood the question since English isn't my first language and then thanked the listener for providing me the feedback. I informed her that I am going to take her suggestions and re-take it soon. I got the badge later.

1 reply
hopezzy January 14th, 2022

@DancingHeart4982 Wow! That's great that you listened to the feedback and got the badge later! Kudos! 🙌

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Kindwords2000 January 7th, 2022

@Heather225

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

If I do not get the role that I applied for, I would ask someone else who has that role for some feedback on how I could potentially get the role in the future and try to respond to the feeback that I have been given to improve. I would say to the leader who has informed me thank you for letting me know and ask for any advise that they could give me.

1 reply
Gnibellen January 14th, 2022

@Kindwords2000

Asking for feedback and expressing gratitude for the opportunity all sound like great ways to deal with the situation.

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