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Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #8) When you don't get the role you want

Heather225 August 27th, 2020
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Please note: In order to successfully complete Course 2, you must respond to this post. Your comment/response should answer the questions/shows that you completed the given activity (if any). Read the post carefully and follow the instructions given. Save your responses to a document that you can later refer to. You will need to copy/paste your response in the course evaluation form at the end of each course to show that you have done the work and to refresh your memory.
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Hello, students! Let's talk leadership!

Many of you have or will apply for certain roles that interest you! And some times we get it and some times we don't! It can be difficult to find out that we didn't get the role, but we can control how we react to it.

Here are some DOs and DON'Ts:

- DO talk to the leader of the role that you applied for and get some input on what you can/need to do in order to get the role next time! Be aware though most leaders of these roles are busy so give it some time!

- DON'T bring the issue into the support rooms. If you are upset, talking to a peer supporter about how you are feeling is ok!

- DO take some self-care, self-care is good for any occasion but its best to deal with those feelings of failure or disappointment outside of 7 cups, things like going on your member account can be so helpful to overcome some of these feelings

- DON'T think that you are obligated to stay on 7 cups right after finding out bad news, especially if you are in LSR/TL and you see other listeners who have gotten the role that you wanted! It can be hard to deal with and it can cause unneeded jealousy or hurt on your part! Not everyone is like this but if you think that this is a possibility that you can think this way staying away might be a great option!

- DON'T take it personally, everyone is ready at different times. It can be hard for us to realize this but just because someone got the role and they might have been here in less or the same amount of time doesn't mean that you personally are ready! Everyone grows and accomplishes things at different times!

- DO get a mentor, in general its a good idea to get a mentor but for things like your goals on 7 cups mentors can be great and helpful! They can give you feedback, do mock chats with you, and overall help you with your goals as I said before!

- DON'T think you have to apply for every role and every team out there! There is time you don't have to apply for everything! Its super easy to burnout that way, and that can lead to more "rejection" and hurt that none of us want!

*Never let not getting a role the first time discourage you! You will be told when you can apply again and use the feedback that you get to better yourself when you can/decide that you are ready to! practice makes perfect none for us are perfect and no one will ever be! Its a good thing to remember no matter your role as a listener your help is greatly appreciated and you are still helping so many people!*

Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

Activity: Please reply to 3 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!

After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next post here! You must take part in the brainstorming/activities given in all of these posts to successfully complete the program.


This post is brought to you by the Leadership Development Program Team, find out more information about the program here.

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kdsyahirah November 21st, 2020
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@Heather225

if something like that happens to me, honest to say that I would be a bit relieved to know yet a bit disapointed at the same time. Of course there will be some sadness consuming me. I'll thank the leader who has informed me for let me knowing this. well it's better I do know that I'm knowing I don't get it. I'll accept anyhing that comes to me because I know it's for the best for myself.

DreamTouch November 23rd, 2020
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@kdsyahirah

Yes! I like your thought that, everything that happens is for the best of ourselves in one way or the other. Seeing a room for improvement on these situations help us to grow as an individual heart

wishfulMoment42 November 25th, 2020
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@kdsyahirah

I really adore and appreciate the open-minded perspective you have here!

hopebeyondpain November 25th, 2020
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@kdsyahirah

It can be a little disappointing to not get a role, but we can always work harder and try again! We might not get it right on the first try, and that's perfectly okay. You got this, I believe in you!

cuteOrange213 December 24th, 2020
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@kdsyahirah

I agree that disappointment would always come into the mix when you don't get a role. But I really like the way you see it, where you will get what is best for you

Overall, an amazing answer! Good jobheart

MyNameIsNicole January 3rd, 2021
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@kdsyahirah

That's so sweet Khalifa <3

mxmes January 16th, 2021
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@kdsyahirah

I love the way you accept things even though you might be feeling down about it.

BellatheHappyHelper January 26th, 2021
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@kdsyahirah

thanking the leader is a great idea, it shows appreciation and respect. keep up the great work!

IceCream4IceCream January 28th, 2021
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@kdsyahirah

That's a great attitude towards such a situation. Some things fall apart so better things can fall together?

warmLove3625 February 11th, 2021
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@kdsyahirah

I greatly appeciate your honesty that you will be disappointed but will be able to move forward and grow through it. I agree that whatever comes up can be something to grow through and develop the self through.

Best of luck on your LDP Journey !

Moonlemon48 October 20th, 2021
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@kdsyahirah

Love the way you accept things!

DreamTouch November 23rd, 2020
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@Heather225

If you find out you were not given a role,
*) How should you respond?
After analyzing it myself for a bit, I would ask for feedback so that I could make sure I'm fit for it before applying the next time

*) What would you say to the leader who has informed you?
I would thank them for taking time to inform me and providing me the feedback and ask them for a bit of guidance on things I need to improve smiley

wishfulMoment42 November 25th, 2020
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@DreamTouch

I am glad about your positive take on this. This is helpful!

hopebeyondpain November 25th, 2020
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@DreamTouch

Asking for feedback can be scary, I'm proud of you for being willing to reach out for it, Dream!

kdsyahirah November 25th, 2020
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@DreamTouch never think of it but either way I'll pray you for the best.

December 22nd, 2020
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Well said @DreamTouch

cuteOrange213 December 24th, 2020
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@DreamTouch

Feedback definitely helps to improve yourself in a lot of ways

Impressive answer overallheart

sia1325 December 28th, 2020
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@DreamTouch

Really a great response!

MyNameIsNicole January 3rd, 2021
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@DreamTouch

That's a good thing to do.

January 22nd, 2021
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@DreamTouch Feedback before re-applying sounds good smiley

Moonlemon48 October 20th, 2021
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@DreamTouch

Awesome response!

wishfulMoment42 November 25th, 2020
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@Heather225

Well, It would be disheartening for sure but at the same time, if at all you have been eligible to apply for a role if naturally implies you are in some sense mature and open-minded. So I would have taken it normally and I would have continued being the best listener I can be.

hopebeyondpain November 25th, 2020
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@wishfulMoment42

Yes, focusing on what you can do (ie. be as good of a listener as you can be), is a great way to redirect your focus from not getting the role you wanted. I'm glad to see your committed to doing a good job no matter what

Chevy81 November 29th, 2020
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@wishfulMoment42

I like how you mentioned the maturity and open-mindedness. Also I agree that the best and helpful way to accept 'rejection' is to keep doing things that we love, the best way we can.

hopebeyondpain November 25th, 2020
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If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

I would thank them for taking the time to review my application and for putting in so much effort into the team they're leading. I would then request feedback from the leader in charge of giving feedback, and work on what I can improve on. I can also take time to work on my skills, and gain more experience, as well as find a mentor to help me.

Chevy81 November 29th, 2020
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@hopebeyondpain

being thankful is always a good thing to do heart those things on your list are helpful, thank you for sharing

sunlightspirit February 6th, 2021
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@Chevy81

Succinct and to the point

blitheEmbrace27 December 3rd, 2020
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Such a great response! 😊 @hopebeyondpain

sia1325 December 28th, 2020
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@hopebeyondpain

Well said!

Chevy81 November 29th, 2020
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If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond?
I would accept it, maybe not instantly. I would need to process it, to think about what things I should improve and which area I should practice more. And the most important thing, I would ask to the person informed me, some feedback. And if possible, I would try to re-apply when I'm more ready.

What would you say to the leader who has informed you?
I would say thank you for informing me because I would appreciate to get informed than have no clue if my application was approved or declined. Then I would ask them some feedback and maybe discussion on how I could be better.

Dazzle28purvi December 8th, 2020
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@Chevy81 very well thought!

lyricalAngel70 December 23rd, 2020
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@Chevy81

I agree with you. Having no clue about our application can be exhausting & discouraging.

January 22nd, 2021
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@Chevy81 It's a very thoughtful reply Chevy loved it heart

wanjiku November 30th, 2020
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@Heather225

i would be dissapointed ofcourse but i would try not to take it personally. i would remind myself its not the end of the world and that i can always apply again in the future.

its nobody's fault if one doesnt get the role they wanted so i would not take it out on the person who delivered the message. i would thank them and tell them i look foward to working with them in the future if possible.

blitheEmbrace27 December 3rd, 2020
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You have such a great, positive outlook! ❤️@wanjiku

blitheEmbrace27 December 3rd, 2020
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If you find out you were not given a role:

How should you respond?

I would probably take some time to process the news, so I don’t speak out of emotions from being upset. I would the remain calm and respectful and ask the leader if the could provide feedback of why I was not given the role. I would analyze what I could do differently or improve on in the future and later re-apply for the role again if I wanted to.

What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

I would thank them, I’m sure it is not an easy thing to do - to tell some one they did not get the role. I would let them know I appreciate them, thank them for the feedback and let them know I understand.

Dazzle28purvi December 8th, 2020
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@blitheEmbrace27 nice work! :)

December 22nd, 2020
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I really likes How you. Said it. @blitheEmbrace27

sia1325 December 28th, 2020
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@blitheEmbrace27

Really nice thoughts!

wonderfulRainbow817 July 15th, 2021
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@blitheEmbrace27 Sometimes we can let our emotions take control and we say things we don't mean to. I think it is great that you would take some time to process those feelings to ensure you will reply kindly and calm.