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Course 2, Discussion 2: Lead by example

Hope December 5th, 2022

Great Leadership, unsurprisingly, starts with yourself!

Practice what you preach. Lead by example. I am sure all of you heard these phrases. But why are they so iconic?

Because the journey starts with the first step and you are the person who is taking the initiative to lead -- Start a journey! So, you are the one who needs to take the first step before expecting others to do it.

To start with leading yourself, close your eyes and visualize two people: someone who inspired and encouraged you to be like them, and someone who discouraged you to be not like them.

Then, write down the good qualities of the person who inspired you as well as the qualities of the second person. You do not have to be specific with the details. Just a bulleted list.

Now, compare the list to yourself. Note the good qualities you have, the bad qualities you have, and give yourself a rating on a scale of 1-10. What we just did is identified your strengths and weaknesses and what you need in order to lead yourself. This allows you to create self-awareness.

Self-awareness is key to leading yourself in the right direction. But, leading yourself is not easy. Just being self-aware isn't enough. It's igniting the spark but not enough to catch the fire. To catch the fire, you need to be persistent with your practice, which is regular reflection. Be consistent with monitoring your efforts and holding yourself accountable.

You can't effectively lead others until you know how to lead yourself. That happens through Self-Observant Leadership: when you deeply understand your identity, compare it to your reputation (how others experience you) and then make meaning of the observations, and choose to adapt.


Exercise:

✒️ What did you learn about yourself through the given exercise?

✒️ Respond to one of your peers in this thread

After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next post here!


🔉This post is brought to you by the Leadership Development Program, find information on it here tinyurl.com/AcademyLDP

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Snowy00 February 21st

@Hope

What did you learn about yourself through the given exercise?

I learned that I am a lot like the person who inspired me, but still my own unique person. I'm hardworking, kind, proactive, understanding, strong, and generous, just like the person who inspired me. I try my hardest every day not to be like the person who discouraged me. The person I try every day not to be like is vindictive, mean, manipulative, abusive, selfish, a liar, a sociopath, and a narcissist. I've learned through this exercise, that even with everything I have been through in life, and the horrible role models I have had along the way, I have still somehow managed to become the person I am today. And it's all because of just that one person who inspired me the most. Some days, I fail. But I use those failures as a way to grow and learn, instead of things to beat myself up over.

I will respond to one of my peers after posting this discussion.

3 replies
Snowy00 February 21st

Basically I learned that I have a lot of good strengths! But I also do have some weaknesses. Fortunately, the good outweighs the bad. I still have a lot of life left to live, a lot of lessons to learn, and a lot of growth and improvement to do. I have learned from the person who inspired me, that we all grow and learn new things every day. Up until the day we die. Everyone has more room for growth, and people CAN change. I certainly did. I used to be a lot like the person who discouraged me, but the person who inspired me, helped me to turn my life around and become the woman I am today.

3 replies
4Jasmine February 25th

@KaylaMaulfair

I really liked how you explained what your strengths and weaknesses are. We all have them, but being able to expound on them, as you did, is awesome. I agree that having a person or persons, a mentor or mentors, to help guide and encourage are a wonderful asset to one's positive growth. Great post! 

JustSophia February 28th

@KaylaMaulfair

First of all, I agree with 4Jasmine.  But I'll reply more specifically below (even though the formatting is messed up - forgive me! lol):

"I'm hardworking, kind, proactive, understanding, strong, and generous, just like the person who inspired me."

It's so wonderful that you can recognize all of these positive things in yourself so specifically, and that you can articulate them.  That's a real skill, and it seems like it serves you very well.  

"The person I try every day not to be like is vindictive, mean, manipulative, abusive, selfish, a liar, a sociopath, and a narcissist."

Wow, sounds like their behavior modeled a great example of what *not* to do.  I'm glad it's something you've been able to learn from. 


"we all grow and learn new things every day. Up until the day we die."


I believe that too, though it's better if we're paying attention about how and what we learn, I think.  If we can control that, that is.  Sometimes I don't think we can.  Sometimes we learn the very things that we don't want to - like negative things from the person you're talking about above. 

"Everyone has more room for growth, and people CAN change. I certainly did. I used to be a lot like the person who discouraged me, but the person who inspired me, helped me to turn my life around and become the woman I am today."

That's awesome, Kayla.  Rock on. 

1 reply
Snowy00 February 28th

@JustSophia

you are so sweet! 🥹🩵🤍🌸 Thank you girly 💕 

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4Jasmine February 25th

@Hope

I discovered that I need to be a little more democratic in leadership. 

1 reply
calmstrawberry0608 February 25th

@4Jasmine

Thanks for sharing!

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calmstrawberry0608 February 25th

I learned how I have a hard time delegating specific and/or harder tasks to people because I'm afraid that it will not get done right. But upon self reflection, I realized how it's not fair to others and I need to be willing to put in more trust.

4Jasmine February 27th

@Hope

I learned that I will make sure that I walk the walk, not just talk the talk. That I will have high attention to details. I will follow up and follow through to get things resolved. I will to lead by example, have self awareness, be encouraging, inspire, and motivate. I will always fight for humanitarian causes. I will be early, not just on time. I will declare an unthinkable goal and achieve it.

These are some of the high standards that I will work towards. I won't be perfect, but I will try 100% to reach for these standards and more. I want to be part of the solution, not part of the problem! 

1 reply
sky2Ocean20 March 6th

@4Jasmine

that's a great insight. The things you have said are inspiring to read. 💚

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JustSophia February 28th

I've always recognized that I have high hopes, high aspirations, high expectations, high standards.  That comes from one of the people I thought about (I had two people in mind as people I've tried to be like). However, it helped me to reflect on the other person who has inspired me.  I realized that she not only had the above, but she also offered those things along with enormous emotional warmth and support and patience, as well as ability to inspire.  The third person I thought about - the person I do not want to be like at all, had some of those first traits I mentioned, like high standards and expectations.  He made those things a very negative example, though, with things like harsh criticism and lack of patience or tolerance. 

These things are a lesson to me because it makes me realize that it's possible to embody so many traits in a positive way, and that I don't have to separate high hopes and standards from emotional warmth and support.  However, it also makes me realize how negative some of these traits can become when they *are* isolated.  These are all things I need to cultivate awareness about.

2 replies
TheOnlyChresser March 8th

@JustSophia Your are really good at writing to be honest :). It looks like all your messages are well written at least those ive seen :D.

1 reply
JustSophia March 11th

@TheOnlyChresser

Thank you so much.  That compliment really means a lot to me.  

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sky2Ocean20 March 6th

@Hope

Being self-aware is the key to finding our strengths and weaknesses. we can let go of the things that don't serve us and build the qualities we like to have as leaders. that's the power of being self-aware. This is the thing I learned from the given exercise. 

1 reply
Ivy229 May 23rd

@sky2Ocean20

I agree being self-aware as leader is critical to be as effective as possible. Good job pointing it out, because I didn't even this about this during the exercise :)

@sky2Ocean20 You are a good leader.

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March 8th

@Hope

I learned that it's important to care about yourself first and love yourself first cause how you give love and care to others if you are not applying that on yourself 

1 reply
Renjik8013 March 29th

@brightLynx1428

Hi, thanks for sharing your insights and I agree with you that loving yourself is an important part of our journey!

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TheOnlyChresser March 8th

✒️ What did you learn about yourself through the given exercise?

I really wanted to learn something new and to be honest i dont feel like i did :(

PetiteSouris March 10th

@Hope @yourbuddy30

What did you learn about yourself through the given exercise? I learnt the importance of humility, supporting the vision of a project/team/company, and following through with an idea to completion as a leader. I learnt that I can implement these lessons while leading in an organization and for my personal life. 

 ❃ Respond to one of your peers in this thread. Hey, I like how you gave yourself a score based off the qualities you admire and dislike in people you know. Self-reflection is important for us to grow as leaders and I want to commend yo for using it in your answer. @mitanshi003

✨✯❥❥❀♡❀❥❥✯✨

daydreammemories March 12th

@Hope

Hi : )

✒️ What did you learn about yourself through the given exercise?

my strengths and weaknesses, and how to improve myself towards becoming a better leader