Eva’s Crazy Mind

@LoveMyMoonflowers

promise. i really really do appreciate it, but.. i can see you’re going through a rough time yourself, i can’t make you deal with me on top of everything. i’m just being dumb and overthinking everything and it’s not important. i love you too much, i can’t do this to you lovely. 🩷

@justmeeva

*huggie wuggies* me sorry for the late-ish reply 🤧 ni friend sort of hopping back and forth from forums to rooms and on top of that trying/thinking of sleeping :P 

your not being dumb at all 💙 it not your fault. overthinking is… painful :') and thoughts can be so vvv mean to us tbh, especially at nighttime. 😞 it’s hard. *keeps hugging* i think we both might be having a rough time :') we can be here for each other. 💜 evabuddybean has helped ni friend so much even when things weren’t so okie in your world :') 

your not doing anything to me… 🥺 me promise. 

@LoveMyMoonflowers

i don’t wanna make anything worse for you.. it’s fine. i can manage. i always do. 🩷

@justmeeva

you never make anything worse… 🥺 nuu buddy :') *huggies* me just worried about you… :') 

@LoveMyMoonflowers

feeling so stupid hehe. i’m sorry for making you worried, i’m sorry for being whatever it is i am tonight. i don’t think there’s anything you could do, i mean even i can’t. but i am happy you’re here. i’ll be okay, i pr- really. *hugs nibuddy and doesn’t let go* 🩷

gonna keep it in my head. just some more time. 

@justmeeva

sitting with you, and sending vvvvv big comforting hugs and tons of love your way… okie, evabuddybeanie? 💜 

there’s a little something, a site that has a blog 💙 that has helped me a little, evabuddy. 💜 me not sure if it would be helpful for everyone but it’s just comforting to scroll through and to read some posts and pieces there 💙 me not sure if you’ve heard of it before :o it called to write love on her arms 💜 (twloha)

@justmeeva

your not stupid at all 💙 but i do understand the feeling. :') *hugs* 💜 me will still be here for an hour or so lol 🤧 can’t really sleep. :P me just a tag away okie? 💙

@LoveMyMoonflowers

*keeps hugging for the longest time* 🩷🫂

@justmeeva

💜💜💜

it’s only getting worse ***..

gonna go. it’s too much. but i’ll be fine. 

@justmeeva

@LoveMyMoonflowers

*hugs tight* goodnight, and thank you. 🩷

@justmeeva

will you be… safes…?

@LoveMyMoonflowers

mhm. don’t worry about me. 🩷

@justmeeva

can’t promise not to worry :')

@justmeeva

mhm 💙 me sleeping in like… 10 minutes maybe xD 💜 is evabuddybeanie sleeping too? 🥺 me knows nighttime can be tough 💙 but i hope you can get some rest :') 💜

*big long hugs back* 💙

wanting to be alone more than anything but with someone is uh.. a different kind of feeling. knowing it’s not possible is a different kind of pain. 

now i’m just crying basically numb. i know i’m sad and i know i’m supposed to be feeling sadness right now but i’m just numb and empty, my mind’s like nonexistent, i know i’m in mental pain atm but i cant feel it, there’s always a *** problem with me

the tears aren’t coming from my heart anymore. i’m back to numb, tears just falling. i doubt i have a soul anymore. feels like it’s not there. ***..

why the *** is it like that? why the *** do i feel so *** detached from the world after an either really happy or really sad situation? why do i go numb? what the *** is this? it’s ruining *** everything life’s not worth living anymore

i can’t deal with this anymore it’s not gonna get better it’s only gonna get worse and harder and i’m barely surviving my current life can’t i just be actually okay for once??

no tears coming out of those eyes anymore

i can’t *** do this anymore

happiness isn’t for me. never was never will be. 

doing this little first letter of words thing. probably not the last time i’m gonna use it. 

tnwir”fitimbs”

idtigtbaml. nshiwelboditiw. 

;

tired of this ***. really *** tired. 

hey mom, just a thought, maybe instead of being mad you should be concerned. 

@justmeeva

*sits with you*

@LoveMyMoonflowers

welcome back friend. 🩷

@justmeeva

thank you buddy 💜

3am. 

…

“it’s crazy what you’ll do for a friend”

“i’m not entirely here

half of me has disappeared”

4am.