The only thing left is memories (Ape's diary, no peaking)

Apeatrice

Hugs vvv tight

Thank you , sweetheart, for taking care of yourself and taking for youself when things are so harsh. Thank you for being you, only you and expecially you. You deserves support and love, expecially from yourself. Honey, you don't needs to try so hard to become soone else. Don't beat yourself up, no need to run so fast.

Love 

Apeatrice

This Wednesday is was so weird. I gotten yelled at by two people and who means a lot to me. 

Firts my tgerepist was mad at me for putting it too much stress on myself. Then mom yelled at me saying I'm not making any good...any good by attending therapy when i don't have even wanna change myself and first. She said there is no point to have therapy. (Or at least a that's not how she made me feel)

Ughhhh....

I think I am punishin myself by refusing to sleep at night...

I so wanna go relapse...

My best friend didn't pm me back when I cry about what happened.

I don't know how to fight now.

I wanna leave 

8/9/24

Apeatrice

Hug vv tight.

Honey, i know things are rllly confusing and hopeless, but please, remember that I love you and I am behind you. You are not alone. 

Things may not turns out to in the way you are expecting but, please don't forgot that nothing will hurts you anymore.

Baby, thank you for staying with so strong and caring and determined.

Please,ending life and ending the pain are very different from of being. 

Realized just now that I m a freak...

Apeatrice

Hug tight

Thank you,honey, for staying so strong and resilient. 

I love you, even the little places that I may sometimes called trouble...

You don'thave to try so hard to become another person, my dear, you alone is already accepted and beloved.

Please starting treat yourself like you do to others.

Love

Apeatrice

Apeatrice

Bear hugs.

Honey, you made it! You are officially 28 days clean. I'm so proud of you, sweetie. It hadn't been easy and you are feeling stressed out....  Like you are all alone and nobody seems to understand.

But please please keep in mind that you have people behind for support, it may not seems like it at this moment, but they loves and cares about you. 

I love you.

Thank you for being you, honey.

Apeatrice

8/11/24

I am being accepted 

I am being suported.

I am safe.

I am going to make it through.

I can stand up for myself.

I am blessed.

I can set respect my boundaries and respect others' too.

I love myself, and always do.

Apeatrice

loves you much.

Thank you sweetheart, no one could have handle the situation better than you. You 've done an amazing job. I'm proud of you.

I know you are struggling at this moment, wanting to relapse. But I believes in you, my little girl. You can pull us through.

Just 5 minutes at the time, ok? And before you know it, you will be there.

Apeatrice

Apeatrice

Coffee and cookies.

Hi love, I'm so proud of you ; today is the 31 day! You done an awesome job, thank you for your dedication and your most note worthy efforts for taking care of your health.

Thank you for staying resilient. We have walked through fire and ***. We can definitely make our way out of this mss.

Love

Apeatrice