How can I open up to people more even if it scares me?
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Last Updated: 06/10/2022 at 3:18pm
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Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
May 31st, 2017 1:59pm
Don't pressure yourself to open up to people whom you are not comfortable talking to. Take your time and identify someone who you trust and is likely to support you. Once you've told one person, it should be easier to tell others
Anonymous
June 25th, 2017 9:33am
Learn who they are as a person, befriend them, and gradually open up to them, little by little. Telling each other likes and dislikes, what movies you prefer, your favorite color, food, what clothes you like to wear. Small talks can be a start to opening up to someone.
It can definitely be hard opening up to people, even if you know them well. What's important is that you take small, manageable steps. Don't try to suddenly force yourself to tell someone your whole life story and all your secrets. Start by telling them trivial facts about yourself, like how you sprained your ankle when you were 8 because you were chasing a bunny. Then gradually tell them more personal details, but don't push yourself.
It is hard to open up to someone about how you are feeling, personally I found it really hard but also really rewarding, when you find the courage to speak and then find out that people are willing to help you, that is one of the most magical experiences you can have. We are here for you on 7Cups, you are always supported through this and you are never alone. Be brave.
Just remember that though opening up makes you feel vulnerable and exposed in front of the other person, it's going to help you reduce that burden you are carrying. Just the act of putting your worries out there will help you see the issues with more clarity. And trust me, that alone will help you so much in trying to figure a way out of your problem
Start with the smallest thing. It dosnt have to be a big secret that you've hidden for years. Something so small can go a long way. That could be telling someone your goals and dreams. Basic conversation.
Better yet, have them open up to you first, by you asking a personal question, and if they give you an answer, one you believe to be honest and genuine. Then give it a shot and answer honestly back.
Sometimes I repeat my favorite quote as a mantra.
"Most of the time, being brave means doing it scared."
It's very true. You you still open up to people even when you are scared. Fear does not have to stop you. Also, the more you do it, the more you'll get used to it. And if you're afraid of what people are going to say, you can always prepare some come backs for rude comments you can find on the internet with a quick google search.
Anonymous
July 25th, 2017 5:43pm
To take it slow. Opening up to people is hard and ideally, there needs to be trust within the relationship for someone to open up. Opening up to people doesn't mean you have to spill your entire guts out of them instantly. Taking a bit of time and slowly telling them personal things is completely alright.
Opening up to people can be difficult, especially if you have a anxiety disorder, or maybe aren't happy with yourself truly, what I have learned is that you do have to try, as scary as it may be, find a hobby, or common interest you like, and join a club, or activity for that interest, be very polite, go up and try to talk to as many people as possible, even just a simple "hello, my name is ______", if you start to feel shy that's OK, just get their phone number, and text them a bit later, maybe ask to go see a movie, or go roller skating :p, pretty soon you'll find yourself opening up to that person :)
Anonymous
August 10th, 2017 10:37am
Avoiding showing oneself to others does not take the fear away, it makes it worse. Slowly and carefully opening up to trusted people makes it less scary to do.
Anonymous
August 11th, 2017 2:00am
Try to find a common topic to discuss or ask a lot of questions about themselves. Inquiring about someone vocation is a great icebreaker.
People are not going to judge you. And even if they do, it's their problem not yours. Don't let negative thoughts come in your mind that everyone is thinking about how bad you are. What you think in your mind is not same to what Others are thinking. Other people have 1000s of thoughts in their mind and millions of things going in their lives. You are just one part of that 1000 thoughs. So just chat with people and don't over think about it.
Start small. You can share simple things that you feel are not too major. Opening up can be a very scary thing to do, but like most things, if you start out small, it might not be easy, but it will at least feel doable. If you're lucky, you'll find somebody who makes you want to share everything and wants you to share it all with them.
Remember that most people only have good intentions; the more you open up, the better equipped they are to be your friend. They will understand you better and know how to treat you well.
You need to pick people you love and trust to open up to. Even thou you are scared you need to remember they have your best interest at heart. Tell the person you are talking to that you are scared and nervous, I am sure they will open their arms and their hearts and will help you thru what ever you are going thru . Just remember it starts with you. Trust is stronger than fear
opening up to people can be scary, especially when you have been hurt in the past. Sometimes you have to just put yourself out there, you may be pleasantly surprised at what you get in return.
Take it 1 step at a time, always remember once you have gotten it off your chest you will feel a lot better.
Try and understand that most people are friendly and helpful! On the other hand, you may find solace in sharing your experience and learning from others.
It takes a lot of courage to open up to someone, especially when it scares you. The best thing to do is calm yourself down, relax and breathe, and think to yourself what you want to say. It especially helps if you're opening up to someone you know well and trust.
Every step counts, no matter how small. Start by talking about less personal things, and allow the conversation to flow naturally. If you meet an obstacle, acknowledge it. It takes two to clap, so both parties must put in the effort to make the conversation work.
Anonymous
December 16th, 2017 8:56pm
It can be scary to open up, especially if youve been hurt before. But you have to realize that there are people who do love you, and will listen to you. They will most likely not run away, you just have to find a little faith and trust.
Opening up to your loved ones can be REALLY scary. So what you've got to do is take baby steps. You could open up to someone you really love slowly you dont have to tell him/her what you are feeling all in one go and if they really love you they will wait. But if the idea of that scares you you can always reach out to one of us here at 7 cups.
Anonymous
December 28th, 2017 10:17am
Start by building a solid relationship based on trust first, then slowly tell them things when you're comfortable. No need to force yourself to open up to people.
Anonymous
January 3rd, 2018 8:20am
You gotta take baby steps. Make one small goal. You could have one thing about yourself you want to share. Then share it at the next possible opportunity. Challenge yourself to find connections between the things people say and things that have happened in your own life, then challenge yourself to answer them. Some people are reserved by nature and its okay, but its nice to prove to yourself you dont have to be. When in doubt, think to yourself about what the worst case scenario of you opening up a tiny bit could be. Good luck x
Slowly but surely might sound like an over-used saying in this kind of situation, or any situation at all, but every little thing helps. Sure, it might be scary to share with people, or just be a little more social, but if you start with the small things, then the big things don't always look so big anymore. You've just got to start small, and it might not always look like you're progressing, but the progress is there.
Anonymous
January 6th, 2018 10:23pm
Here at seven cups listeners are meant to be non-judgemental therefore they are kind caring and supportive. You can try talking to them a about little things that might be bothering you to see if you feel okay saying what is bothering you the most.
Be honest with yourself first. We're all afraid of being vulnerable... we're all terrified of being judged. Yet we tend to judge ourselves more than anyone else ever could.
We fear being open and vulnerable because it hurts the most when it goes bad. Because that's the core essence of who you are, plus the fear. Get rid of the fear and don't worry about being hurt because no one else determines your value.. no one else decides whether or not you're worthy of love and respect. Those decisions lie with you.
Love yourself. Trust yourself. Respect yourself. Value yourself. And you'll never be afraid of opening up your soul and exposing your inner child to those around you.
Anonymous
January 14th, 2018 5:47pm
Just know that they are there to help you and they are there to help you progress, and no matter what your family will support you.
Start comfortably. If it's easier for you to socialize online, try joining a group that interests you that actively discusses things. Think about how you would talk to people about your hobbies. Start with something you're passionate about. Talk to people you encounter every day such as coworkers or other parents if you are a parent. Pick one who looks friendly and think of something nice to say or an interesting question.
Anonymous
February 1st, 2018 8:39am
There is 2 ways to do it. One way is to confront that fear head on by doing it, and eventually the fear will diminish. Another is to work through why you have a fear then slowly tear down the fear.
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