How can I open up to people more even if it scares me?

When you are scared of something, a method that I learned is to work with a "scale of scariness." Write down on a sheet of paper numbers from 1 to 10 (1 means "not scary" and 10 means "so scared I am afraid to die"). Besides each number, write down situations that triggers this type of fear. For instance, a 1 (not scary), could be giving a compliment to someone that you know very well, for instance your parent. A 4 might be giving your opinion in a work meeting. A 7 would be to talk about your emotions. A 10 could be to open up about your childhood traumas to the love of your life. Now, the best thing to do could be to give you small challenges each week. For example, on the first week, you try to do the 1. Then on the second week, you try to achieve the 2. And on the tenth week, you try the 10. If you work this way, you desensitize yourself to your greatest fears very slowly.

From my own personal experience I learned that people cannot communicate effectively with me if I am not open and honest. My husband always said, "I am not psychic, you need to talk to me." I really took that heart and use it with my friends and family more often. If I am not communicating then I would be reacting with emotions and others could not understand why. Sure, opening up may not always be positive, but not doing it at all will usually end up having a negative effect. Also if someone else can learn something from me to take away then that is great. We are allowed to open up at our pace, so do not feel burdened in anyways , maybe start with parts of you that you are more comfortable sharing , initiating a supportive rapport can help establish comfort. Good luck .

Remember that when you open up, you are showing your true self. Everything that’s ever happened to you. You are embracing it and telling people when you open up, you are special no matter what you’ve been through. You could open up by remembering that you are taking a courageous step for yourself. You have to remember you are doing this for yourself. To improve yourself. When you open up it will help in your bravery. What happened in your past does not define you. You define yourself in every way you want. Find the courage within you and remember you are doing this for yourself, because you deserve to let some steam go.

By understanding that you are a one of a kind person and great human being and if people don’t like you for who you are you shouldn’t want to be there friend anyway. By being yourself you can attract real friends who like you for you and not what you can do for them.sometimes the best thing you can do is work on your self in silence and not be worried about having friends and work on being the most successful version of you .By being yourself your setting your self up for real friends and people who care about you genuinely

Approach someone who you trust and are close to, and believe that they have your best interests in mind. You can start off by sharing small parts of the story and wait to see how they react before continuing on and sharing more in depth with them. Hopefully they are reassuring to you, and actively listen to what you are saying. This can make you feel like a huge weight has lifted of your shoulders. By opening up to someone it should make you feel more relieved and less pressured as the proverbial saying goes 'a problem shared, is a problem halved'.

While many people believe opening up or even talking to people is easy to do, there are many of us who have anxiety over such a thing. Taking small steps to open up is a great place to start. Opening up about certain things in our lives can be very scary, but also liberating, once we are able to do so. It can feel good to let someone else into our lives, but it is also understandable, the fear, that is associated with it. Starting with small snippets of information about my life, is how I dipped my toes in the water, and found it to be more helpful!

It's often best to start off small finding someone you can trust, with a small topic that you want to tell them and go from there. I know it can be scary, however maybe by starting off small it will decrease your fear and how scared you are. I hope you find a way that works for you, this is how i learned to open up to people. By choosing the right people to open to at the begining until you are confident enough to just be open constantly. Choose understanding, loving people you can open to, people who has proven they care and won´t judge you for who you are, it sounds weird but there are many people in the world who just accept you for who you are.

Opening up to people can be nerve wrecking, but sometimes it is worth asking yourself what it is that scares you about it. Often we feel nervous because we have some sort of expectation of how the interaction should go, or what sort of outcome it should have, and then when things don't go as planned we feel upset, or like we have failed in some way. Also, past experiences of being hurt by someone you have opened up to can make you scared to open up to new people. I found starting small and working on my expectations really helped me open up.

Start small. Relate your experiences to others. Share a hobby you like or a song that resonates with you. Little by little, you're giving your loved ones breadcrumbs of who you are. Once you begin to feel more comfortable, you can start breaking off bigger chunks. Quality time with people will also help. Comfort is a major part of opening up. Learn more about the other person too. You never know what you might have in common. Trust is important too. It can be difficult, as from personal experience. Part of opening up is trusting that the other person wants to hear what you have to say and wants to help you. Opening up can be daunting at first, but just doing a little bit everyday can help immensely.

You shouldn’t let fear stop you. There are going to be people who dearly care for you and want you to open up to them so they can help understand you. Not everyone will betray you or use your feeling agasint you just remember that. You are not alone and there are many people out there willing to help you or even strangers online you reach out to when you are feeling alone. Don’t be scared of opening up because there are people who probably open up to you who are also terrified to speak about there feelings too

Thanks for reaching out! Opening up to people can leave you feeling hesitant, anxious and worry about being judged. Anxiety UK, Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA) and Mental Health America are examples of organizations to help support those with Anxiety. As someone who identifies with what you are going through, my own personal experience opening up to people little by little has been helpful. Please know that there is no obligation for everyone to know everything about you! You don't exactly have to share everything with people the moment you meet them. Mystery is something! Everyone is in the same boat as you. We all fear being judged. The only difference is that some make it less obvious than others that they fear being judged. Let yourself have a fun time and enjoy yourself! You might want to ask yourself what you would like people to ask you questions about and then that can set up you asking them questions. That can be a good start! Take opening up as a chance for people to change whatever perceptions they have of you prior to opening up. Opening up is an opportunity! You are welcome to communicate with one of our listeners or therapists on our site for further support. Also available on our site are mindfulness exercises and self-help guides to look into! I tell myself that no one is judging you and you're the only one making it hard on yourself. I think this way of thinking has really helped me opened up to other people. I hope you come to realize is that don't be too difficult about yourself.

I’d say try to take it one step at a time. You may have to build that trust with someone you feel comfortable with. It is important that you feel like they won’t judge you. Then if you start an open conversation, perhaps a topic on what you want to go deeper into, it will give them chance to speak their opinions on it and for you to open up a bit more. But make sure to keep it slow. If you do too much, you may get put off. Just try your best and that’s all you can do :)

It sounds like you feel you are in a position where you want to be as open as you can be but worry or panic about the reception you will receive about what you share. To understand where the fear of sharing information about yourself comes from you can reflect on if there was any experience you did share in the past with someone. What kind of response did you get from that past experience? What do you generally expect from people who are close to you? If worried about opening up it may be beneficial to put yourself in the shoes of the friend opening up to another friend about a topic or experience they feel uncomfortable sharing. If you have compassion for others then why not yourself for what you have gone through? Planning what you are going to say can also make things easier, as it allows you to get across how you feel more and so help someone else understand what you are going through. Sharing information about yourself is not something that needs to be rushed. It can be a gradual process. You may alert them that you feel afraid to share a personal experience but then tell them you are struggling and gradually let them know more as you begin to trust them more. It is really important to ask yourself what way of communication helps you become more open. Is it spoken communication? Is it through messaging, text, telephone or writing a letter? Do think of the method you feel suits you best. For further support feel free to communicate with one of our listeners of therapists anonymously. To open up takes trust and the right time. It's up to you to make that decision with patience and self-acceptance.

I would imagine your fear on opening up may be like my own, perhaps that you opened up to someone in the past and got hurt or simply haven't opened up to a specific person before, making it rather nerve racking for you. I have some things I tell myself to think and do when trying to open up, let me share these with you: Firstly, remembering you do not need to tell someone *everything* right off the bat. Perhaps there is one specific detail you wish to talk about, and you could start there. Maybe the person hearing this will share their thoughts on it, hopefully in a good way of course, and be there to support you with it. Also, try to recognise that this person cares for you. Remember that your friends and family love you, and in most cases they just want to support you in being happy and healthy, you probably have no need to be scared of talking with your loved ones, so this could be something to remind yourself of. Finally, ask them first. Instead of throwing information and draining both yourself and the recipient of your story, ask ahead of time if they would be up for this. Then you could organise a time and place to talk, a safe atmosphere, and you can both prepare yourself in advance OR cancel if it becomes too overwhelming. Remember, there is no need to force it, if you are not ready to talk then that's completely okay.

It is scary to be vulnerable with others, especially if you don't know how they will respond. When wanting to open up to others it can be helpful to gauge how much you share based on how safe you feel around the other person. When identifying how safe someone is it can be helpful to consider how much you trust the other person, do they respect your boundaries, do they tend to respond in helpful ways, and are they able to be empathetic to your feelings. If you are scared maybe think about what is causing you to feel this way. Is it because it comes from a place of fearing trying something new or is it coming from fear of not knowing if you can trust the other person with what you would like to share? If it is the later of the two reasons only share as much or as little as you feel comfortable.

Even if it scare you to open up it is comforting to know that talking about your feelings almost always helps. Keeping feelings bottled up inside could easily cause a person to go crazy. Once you find someone you are able to open up to it makes things so much easier. I am sure it is not easy to open up to people especially strangers on a plat form like 7 cups, however on here it is a judgement free zone. 7 cups is a great place to feel free to discuss your feelings with people who dont know you.

I would suggest that you slowly create a support system for yourself with the people who are already close to you, and then slowly open up to others. Although, I’m not in your situation opening up to new people is much easier when you do it bit by bit rather than all at once. I’d also suggest to try making this other person feel that they can open up to you too. That way you can learn more about this other person, while they learn more about you. As I stated earlier, I’m not in your situation so I don’t know the specifics, but I understand how you feel and I hope everything turns out well for you.

Just with simple hi..and wait to respond them ya just trying to be funny with them in starting of conversation so they become comfortable and not hesitate to talk to me .always trying to find there way of mind and trying to connect that. I also feel like that when I do this way people feel connected to me and they feel good about that and ready to start to talk more freely and more openly sometime they connect with heart that makes them feel good and lighter and they forget there problems. That how I always try to open up with peoples.

Find friends, family, peers, or support workers that you are comfortable sharing your personal life with. It is a scary thing to overcome and can take a while but start by sharing not so personal things and moving up from there. You can practice with people online if that helps.. like 7Cups! Don't be afraid if a few people don't take it well! Not everyone is meant to handle others opening up to them. Asking for permission to open up to them a bit more might help. Figuring out how they react to others opening up can also help you find the right person. Remember to breathe and take things at a slow pace:)

Some ways to open up to people more even if it scares you is to understand that they are not trying to judge you. Other people may want to help you with whatever troubles you make be going through. Also, it may help you in the long-run or in the future. Venting or letting out your feelings can help make you feel good about the current situation or help solve a problem that has been weighing you down. Talking about your feelings can help you express yourself and figure out why you are feeling the certain way you do.

you just gotta to trust and make sure that you genuinely feel safe around that person, but then again being scared or afraid to let someone in because you did it once and they hurt you its gonna be a struggle. but so what they hurt yo but it dont mean everyone gonna be like that you gotta open up and see what/ who they are let them show you that they care let them be part of your life dont hold back because you will never know if you help out on something that couldve been something amazing that could save you and change you in a good way always be open but not to the point where you u know you gonna get hurt and still open up. open up to those who will care for you and love you for being you goodnight love you babes

You could start off slow by being open with someone you are comfortable with. It doesn't necessarily have to be talking about something vulnerable to you, but even just a topic you don't really talk about with the people around you. Finding ways to learn more about others can also help you feel more open to sharing about yourself. You could do this through asking a lot of questions or speaking on topics you're passionate about to see their view. I know opening up at first, can be a scary thing, but knowing that you took that step to challenge yourself will feel so rewarding in the end. :)

Well, *scares you* tells you've got fears and it's completely okay to have fears, we all have fears but fears shouldn't control us. In order to be independently talking or independently doing anything you need to set yourself free from all your fears one at a time. I understand opening up can have fears regarding being left or judged, or even trust issues but it's okay. We have the right to take time to choose one of the best people to talk about our problems or even good deeds. Once you worrying about what version of you is created in someone else's mind, I guess it'll get easier for you to talk it out. Thanks.

If it doesn't scare you even a little, then it's not worth doing. Just go for it. I think you have to look at why it scares you so much and tackle that FIRST because that's the bigger issue here. Talking to people is an exchange, you're not giving them information about yourself for free. And you can do it at your own pace, by your own rules. Keeping that in mind will make it a lot easier to open up. Also, as you get to know the person, if it's right...you'll find yourself being drawn to them and wanting to tell them more about you-maybe even more than they want to know. lol

You can't force yourself to open up to people if you're scared about it. But, don't rush, take your time, one step at a time until you get there. And also, please make sure that you've opened up to the right people because it's hard and traumatizing to open up to the wrong ones. But if you're really scared to open up more, you can just not do it. Don't force yourself because it will just add pressure on you but instead, take your time, just take your time. Condition yourself first, ready yourself, and if you're ready to open up more to people then that's it.

This is such a great question and I am working on this myself!! How can you trust when you don't actually trust? First of all, we can acknowledge that it is self-abusive to force yourself to trust when you don't trust! It is better to come back to ourselves, and show kindness and gentleness to ourselves in the way we wish others would. Tich Nhat Hanh tells a story of a time when he left the windows open in his home, and when he returned his papers were blown all over the place, so he tidied them up, and lit a fire. I think our minds our similar. Stuff can get blown around, but we can simply tidy up and light the fire to make our mind cozy again. From that place we can rest from the pursuit of the outer world, and return when we feel rested again. This sort of self-love is something I am learning about and constantly evolving with, and ultimately I am opening up to myself to start. Other things that have helped me in the past: 1) learning journalling techniques. I particularly like the technique of writing down my fearful and resentful thoughts, and then my last line will be "thank you god" or "thank you universe" for hearing me and assisting me with these fears where I cannot. Then I sign it, and burn it out back. I learned about it here: https://youtu.be/3N_t0ZSvn_Y Another thing that has helped has been to be a part of group experiences. Reiki trades, social meditation practices, group coaching, group dance therapy, etc etc, whatever is being offered near me on online at the time. In a group, we come together to intentionally work together on issues we are facing, and some people feel more comfortable about certain aspects of being where often we do not, and visa versa. When they share their story or their thoughts, we suddenly feel as though we have PERMISSION to understand ourselves in that same way, and feel less alone. We feel naturally more open in these scenarios without having to really cross any of our own boundaries. Then lastly, a spiritual tool that really helps is CURIOSITY. When we feel constricted, it is because some thing feels threatening to us in a way we don't know how to control. Sometimes this is legitimate! It's pretty normal to feel like hey, I don't wanna open up to this person who is gonna use my story to judge me or make me feel worse. But in some cases, the person will be able to share a more expansive point of view without invalidating you. In other cases, we ourselves will be able to have compassion for a person who is small minded about our situation. In still other cases, it's perfectly fine to give up and go in a whole other direction. Recently, I felt totally shut down around a particular person, and it hurt greatly, but I knew trying to plow through wasn't going to work because I had already tried connecting with her. Instead I wound up on a hike listening to an audio book called "The Book of Joy." I really don't know if it would have been possible for me to have made a better decision or to be more open to her, but I certainly felt good that I was at least opening myself to quality information and moving forward anyways. I hope this helps?

You must find someone that you trust. Ask a lot of questions and communicate. Then you can start telling the person little things about you and you will see if he/she is really interested in you. Once you feel comfortable, you can start telling the person more important and bigger things about you. I also sometimes have a problem with that. When I tell someone something personal, I feel vulnerable and that nobody cares. But at the end you will see that you will be relieved and feel better. I know it can be scary, but you can do it!

Get to know those people and ask their opinions on things in general. Sense who they are and give them what you would want to get when they open up. Only open up to those who put you at ease.Take your time to get to know people. Open up about small things first. A person who tends to be very judgemental, come with an agenda, not listen well, not let you speak well, misunderstand many things you say, ridicule you for anything. They may not be that person to whom you need to open up. The right person is attentive, understanding, tolerant (within reason), and open minded.

Even considering opening up to people when it causes you fear is an incredibly courageous thing to be doing. Not bottling things up is often good advice but we need to be sure that we are selective about who we do open up to. How would you suggest opening up to a close friend who told you that they had this problem? Treating yourself as that good friend and taking your own advice is a great way to take care of yourself, or practice self-care and that is something that is especially I.oortant if you feel you might be letting yourself be vulnerable by opening up. I give you direct advice as we are all different and si are our situations, but think carefully about who you will open up to and how much you will be letting out.

Think about your goal rather the act of doing what you need to do to meet your goal. Life can be quite scary at times for many different reasons. It can also make us feel trapped due to the fear. Finding ways to eliminate that fear or at least make it more minuscule is important. That being said, one tactic I have found in helping me do that is thinking of my end goal. Thinking about where I want to be or where overcoming the barriers ahead will put me in the long run. Thinking about the big picture is very helpful in doing that. It gives you a sense of responsibility and purpose too. It is not always easy, but it always can be the difference that you need to remind yourself to make it.