Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #9) Passive-Aggressive Communication
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Healthy communication is key!
Questions:
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
Activity: Please reply to 3 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!
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@Heather225
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
The silent treatment / Subtle insults / Procrastinating on purpose / Sabotage / Keeping score
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
The silent treatment
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
Passive aggression does not allow people to grow together and to improve but creates a toxic environment where people will find it hard to work and experience negative stress.
@amiablePeace77
Very good!
@amiablePeace77
Toxic environments are definitely things we should avoid as a community so we can grow and prosper together!
@amiablePeace77
I totally agree! I think it does create an unsupportive or hostile space.
@amiablePeace77 sorry you have experienced the silent treatment in your life. That must be very hurtful.
@soulsings
true soul but I learned to deal with it
@amiablePeace77
The a fine way to put it. Enjoyed reading your take.
@amiablePeace77
The pretty well and concise.
@amiablePeace77 I loved your answer 
@amiablePeace77
I agree that passive aggressive behaviour creates a toxic environment and I think that was a really great word to apply to this. I appreciate your honesty about how you have been passive aggressive in the past and I was able to learn from you.
Best of luck on your LDP journey!
@amiablePeace77
Very well thought response!
QUESTION : What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
ANSWER : (1) Silent Treatment, (2) Subtle Insult, (3) Procrastinating on Purpose, (4) Sabotage, (5) Keeping Score
QUESTION : What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
ANSWER : Keeping Score is I think a very common human reaction and I've faced this very often in life. People take things personally and judge others and end up reacting by keeping score. Also it happens because they do things for people with expectations of getting something in return. Like a favor. My ex-in laws, my own grandmother and my father are classic examples. They would keep score of everything and pay calculate. I'm sorry I can't share any example as I feel they are all too personal. Every example. If I remember something shareable, I'll update soon.
QUESTION : Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
ANSWER : Passive aggression creates toxic environment, miscommunication, limits growth, encourages triangulation, feelings of anger and disappointment, and so much more! No community can flourish or prosper with all these things going on.
@peacefulWarrior10 - excellent responses!! :)
@WonderfulRainbows2862
Thank you so much <3
@peacefulWarrior10
I totally agree! Passive-agression limits effective communication. Great job!
@peacefulWarrior10 thanks for sharing about how passive aggressive behavior has affected your life. It is okay not to give more specifics than you did. What you did was perfectly adequate.
@peacefulWarrior10
Well said! Passive aggretion is a common human reaction, but doesn't mean its ok
Great answers! ❤️ I think many times people aren’t away of how hurtful it can be to expect favours in return and keeping score all the time !@peacefulWarrior10
@peacefulWarrior10 I agree with the points you mentioned. All those things can damage the community.
@peacefulWarrior10, I am sorry your family has done this to you and please don't feel bad for not sharing details! That is personal to you and it is none of our business to ask. I do agree that part of keeping score is expecting a favor in return. I find that people are always trying to get one ahead so they can have that favor in their back pocket.
@peacefulWarrior10
Well done on thinking about your answers thoroughly
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
1. The Silent Treatment
2. Subtle Insults
3. Procrastinating on purpose
4. Sabotage
5. Keeping Score
What is one example of passive-aggressive behaviour you have experienced in your life?
I have experienced the silent treatment, and the subtle insults. I will not go into details about them, but I can say that it was very hurtful!
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
Passive aggression is very damaging to our community as it can cause confusion and misunderstanding. It can also lead to mistrust and increase in hostility between members.
@NorahListens sorry that you have experienced hurtful passive aggressive behavior. No need to go into more detail than that. Thanks for sharing.
@Heather225
The 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication:
1. Silent treatment
2. Subtle insults
3. Procrastinating on purpose
4. Sabatoge
5. Keeping score
An example from my life is that I once had a co-worker who would consistently delay getting me information for projects even though he knew this delay caused me to work late each time to catch up.
Passive aggressive behavior can damage our community because we have to be able to trust each other in doing what we say we will do and in providing support to each other.
@KindnessMatters2020
I find keeping score is like sociol psychology of you using someone.
1. The silent treatment, subtle insults, procrastinating on purpose, sabotage, keeping score.
2. I have experienced subtle insults from a friend, which had been disheartening.
3. It's damaging because it doesn't solve the core problem all the while draining energy on both parties.
@SophieWX
Such a great point, passive aggressive behavior is so draining and unproductive! Great responses.
@SophieWX
@SophieWX
I agree with you, it often doesn't solve the core problem
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
The silent treatment, subtle insults, procrastinating on purpose, sabotage, keeping score.
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
I've experienced sabotage in my life. A friend of mine ruined a presentation I was doing on purpose
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
It's an undirect way to put someone else in a difficult situation and it can ruin someone's self-esteem. It hurts their feelings.
@Ginevra962 That must have hurt when your friend sabboataged your presention. Sorry you experienced that.
@Heather225
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
Silent treatment, subtle insults, procrastinating on purpose, sabotage, keeping score
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
The silent treatment - back when I was in a long distance relationship. My gf used this passive aggressive technique on me and it was really a bad experience.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
In our community, it is important to resolve conflicts quickly and using any kind of passive aggressive techniques would do more harm than good.
@YoungMonastic007 You make a good point about the importance of resolving conflicts quickly.
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
- The silent treatment
- Subtle insults
- Procrastinating on Purpose
- Sabotage
- Keeping Score
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
I've had someone not respond to my messages before.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
It shuts down communication, leaves people feeling hurt and drains our tanks.
@AffyAvo Very good answer!
Great answers! ❤️@AffyAvo
@Heather225
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
1.) Silent treatment
2.) Subtle insults
3.) Procrastinating on purpose
4.) Sabatoge
5.) Keeping Score
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
I have done all of them at least once in my life, because I get mad and then keep it to myself and drop hints to make others see I'm upset. I started doing them less and less when I started realizing I've been doing them, and I'm happy that I have improved on those skills.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
We should strive to be honest with each other and be support of each other. We should want to watch each other grow, as well as ourselves, and should not be held back by problems that can be solved quickly
@BeautifulMasterpiece
Sabotage I find has been used mostly as a way to get a higher position over someone.
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
1. The silent treatment
2. Subtle insults
3. Procrastinating on Purpose
4. Sabotage (deliberately messing something up)
5. Keeping Score (People who keep track of favors)
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
Silent treatment, it's so easy to fall into and make it your default when you're upset, and an easy way out temporarily to avoid the situation until it is resolved
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
It highlights a lack of communication, and respect for others. It shows no trust and cruelty towards others in a backhanded manner
@Dinoprincess12
I didn't realize that passive-agressive could mean it disrespects and come out as cruel to others. Thank you for the insights!
@Dino12
Very good observations made Dino, Good luck with the remainder of the course ;)
