Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #9) Passive-Aggressive Communication
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Healthy communication is key!
Questions:
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
Activity: Please reply to 3 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!
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@Heather225
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
Silent Treatment, Subtle Insults, Procrastinating on Purpose, Sabotage, Keeping Score
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
Procrastinating and being lazy. Giving silent treatment or being mean while angry
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
It damages the community from within people start hating each other and get angry without clearly explaining themselves or understanding the other person's point of view.
@BookChunky
This is a nice answer! In the community, it is extremely important not to get angry without clearly explaining ourselves or understanding the other person's point of view.
@BookChunky
Agreed!
@Heather225
5 Signs: Silent treatment, Subtle insults, Procrastinating on purpose, Sabotage, Keeping score
I lived in a hostel when I was young and this was pretty common but we all grew out of it.
In a community, passive-aggressive communication always leads to misunderstandings and lack of clarity which can harm the community's progress.
@Heather225
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
The 5 signs of passive-aggression communication are: silent treatment, subtle insults, procrastinating on purpose, sabotage, and keeping score.
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
Oh my, I think I've received the end of all 5, but the main ones would definitely be subtle insults, procrastinating on purpose, and keep score. One main example that really happens all the time (that might be due to my insecurities too) is subtle insults because there are so many days when I interact in group chats and am left wondering if they just insulted me or not. Sometimes they really might not have meant it, but I am always left questioning it. Procrastinating on purpose is something I really deal with like once every 2 weeks when we have group projects, and someone just has to purposely not do their work; we talk it out after a long time, but it gets really frustrating as well. I know some people might say that I occasionally might silent treatment others, but I 100% did not mean it; I just sometimes have trouble thinking exactly what to say, and it really takes me some time to process everything as well, common misunderstanding mistake, oops.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
Passive aggression is damaging because it resolves nothing, people are left unsure about the situation, wastes a lot of time, reduces all our progress (gets nowhere), and decreases our actions to help others (especially if they are keeping score), respectively to the five passive aggression communication. In all, it is just really not beneficial and has no positive effects.
@DayDreamWithYou
Very detailed and nicely worded answer! I really like it. I can totally feel you with your experience of subtle insults. Actually it just happened to me recently and I also just kept wondering whether they just insulted me or not. So I was pretending as nothing happened and tried to continue to the conversation and after I got another answer that got me completely confused and I felt so puzzled. It is sad to hear that it also happened to others in group chats. Thank you for sharing your experience!
@DayDreamWithYou
Great answer and I can really relate to the points!
@Heather225
1. What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
- 5 Signs of the passive-aggressive communication are: The silent treatment, subtle insult, procrastinating on purpose, sabotage (deliberately messing something up), keeping score (keeping track of favors)
2. What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
- I have experienced the silent treatment. I had lots of work and I was not able to reply to my friend immediately and she got angry and stopped talking to me and when I asked she acted like nothing happened but I could feel that she was angry.
3. Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
- Passive aggression is so damaging to our community because it involves an indirect negative message that is confusing instead of telling directly to the other person what the problem is. Therefore, it can lead to lower self-esteem of the person who is told something that is passive aggression. Furthermore, the person is avoiding talking directly about the conflict that further increases it. Additionally, it can also be seen as a kind of manipulation so the aggressor can get what they want.
@MoonlightHelper1
you described the damage passive aggresive behaviour can cause really great and clear *-*
@MoonlightHelper1
Yeah, we definitely have to always think about the other person before we chose our own actions so we don't effect the other person in a negative way
1. The Silent Treatment
2. Subtle Insults
3. Procrastinating on Purpose
4. Sabotage
5. Keeping Score
One example of being passive aggressive has been from my family and subtle remarks can be quite confusing and frustrating to receive.
Passive aggressiveness is damaging to our community because it deals with a lack of communication. It generally results in less togetherness and discourages working together.
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
1) Silent treatment 2) Subtle Insults 3)Procrastination on purpose 4)Sabotage 5)Keeping Score
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
A few months ago I was in the hospital and I asked the RN to speak to the house supervisor and the RN told me she had other patients besides me to attend to, and when I pointed out that I was the only patient inside, since everyone else was outside she just gave me the silent treatment and refused to respond to anything I had to say.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
It creates a hostile and confusing environment and stops progress. Everything we do on 7cups requires communication with other 7cups community members. If listeners are passive-aggressive toward members, members dont get the support they deserve. If listeners are passive aggressive toward each other goals dont get met. Passive aggressive communication is a very indirect way of communicating what ones needs are and if we dont communicate directly how can we expect others to know what we need from them.
@InvaderStitch
I hate nurses who bully patients in hospitals - they have so much power to so easily ruin someone's day and it's so easy to get away with this sort of slackness, negligence and bullying. In Australia, it is compulsory for hospitals to have a system for inpatients to complain about staff behaviour, and there are also external complaint systems as well. It's a really sad fact that people who are bullies tend to look for jobs which will give them this sort of power to cause deliberate harm: occupations like teachers, nurses and prison guards. . . any occupation where someone has power over another calls for people to be trained that power actually equals responsibility and that their duty of care is to avoid causing accidental (or deliberate) offence or harm.
@Heather225
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
1. Silent treatment
2. Subtle insult
3. Procrastinating on-purpose
4. Sabotage
5. Keeping score
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
Wow well when I was 14 one of my "close" friends ignored me for 2 years because of some unknown reason and it really hurt that my existence felt like a myth to her
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
It doesn't encourage a system of talking things out. Subtle hints and jabs are difficult for people to understand so both parties dwell in a system of misinterpretation
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
1. The silent treatment
2. Subtle insults
3. Procrastinating on Purpose
4. Sabotage (deliberately messing something up)
5. Keeping Score (People who keep track of favors)
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
All of them. All bullies are cowards and passive aggression is indirect so that the coward can either evade detection or pretend that they didnt mean to cause any harm or offense, and was simply misunderstood. There other types of passive aggressive behaviour that are missing from the video. Passive aggression also at least includes
6. Nuisance tasks asking workers to do tasks that are not actually going to be used and just waste a bullying victims time
7. Witholding praise praising most workers but leaving the bullying victim without any acknowledgement
8. Witholding access letting some people know about opportunities and leaving the bullying victim out
9. Task favouritism picking and choosing who gets interesting jobs and giving the boring or difficult jobs all the time to the bullying victim.
10. Gossip. Gossip has always been a type of passive aggression Passive means indirect and any type of aggression that is not direct is passive. Gossips are always far too cowardly to offer the person they are defaming a chance to defend themselves, at least until they have gossiped for long enough to gather a group to gang up and help them bully their victims.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
Bullying causes harm to the victim, unease to the people that see that happening, ruins expectations and relationships, destroys trust and warmth and kills people, and thats why its against the law in volunteer workplaces in Commonwealth countries. Passive aggression is just a particularly cowardly type of bullying.
1.) 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication:
The silent treatment
Subtle insults
Procrastinating on purpose
Sabotage
Keeping score
2.) I feel like the 3rd sign
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication? Silent treatment; subtle insults; procrastinating on purpose, sabotage, and keeping score.
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life? I think I can honestly say I have done all of the above at least once in my life (especially #1 and #3). Procrastinating revision for exams is probably the worst one!
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community? It promotes unhelpful behaviour and general negative stigma. It doesn't benefit anyone, even the person who is doing it.
@RebekahRebel
i like the point where you mention that it doesn't benefit anyone even the one who's doing it!