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Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #8) When you don't get the role you want

Heather225 August 27th, 2020

Please note: In order to successfully complete Course 2, you must respond to this post. Your comment/response should answer the questions/shows that you completed the given activity (if any). Read the post carefully and follow the instructions given. Save your responses to a document that you can later refer to. You will need to copy/paste your response in the course evaluation form at the end of each course to show that you have done the work and to refresh your memory.
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Hello, students! Let's talk leadership!

Many of you have or will apply for certain roles that interest you! And some times we get it and some times we don't! It can be difficult to find out that we didn't get the role, but we can control how we react to it.

Here are some DOs and DON'Ts:

- DO talk to the leader of the role that you applied for and get some input on what you can/need to do in order to get the role next time! Be aware though most leaders of these roles are busy so give it some time!

- DON'T bring the issue into the support rooms. If you are upset, talking to a peer supporter about how you are feeling is ok!

- DO take some self-care, self-care is good for any occasion but its best to deal with those feelings of failure or disappointment outside of 7 cups, things like going on your member account can be so helpful to overcome some of these feelings

- DON'T think that you are obligated to stay on 7 cups right after finding out bad news, especially if you are in LSR/TL and you see other listeners who have gotten the role that you wanted! It can be hard to deal with and it can cause unneeded jealousy or hurt on your part! Not everyone is like this but if you think that this is a possibility that you can think this way staying away might be a great option!

- DON'T take it personally, everyone is ready at different times. It can be hard for us to realize this but just because someone got the role and they might have been here in less or the same amount of time doesn't mean that you personally are ready! Everyone grows and accomplishes things at different times!

- DO get a mentor, in general its a good idea to get a mentor but for things like your goals on 7 cups mentors can be great and helpful! They can give you feedback, do mock chats with you, and overall help you with your goals as I said before!

- DON'T think you have to apply for every role and every team out there! There is time you don't have to apply for everything! Its super easy to burnout that way, and that can lead to more "rejection" and hurt that none of us want!

*Never let not getting a role the first time discourage you! You will be told when you can apply again and use the feedback that you get to better yourself when you can/decide that you are ready to! practice makes perfect none for us are perfect and no one will ever be! Its a good thing to remember no matter your role as a listener your help is greatly appreciated and you are still helping so many people!*

Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

Activity: Please reply to 3 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!

After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next post here! You must take part in the brainstorming/activities given in all of these posts to successfully complete the program.


This post is brought to you by the Leadership Development Program Team, find out more information about the program here.

922
cuteeeezombieeee April 20th, 2021

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond?

Ans: If I find out that I have not been given a role, I should try my best to respond as positively as possible. Maybe the role wasn’t the right fit for me! Of course, negative feelings will arise and healthy coping methods can help me through it. I could reach out to a peer supporter or try to stay away from cups for a little while to cool down the negative feelings. I shouldn’t let these feelings interfere in my path of improving and working on myself to be ready for the correct role at a later time.

What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

Ans: I would ask them for constructive feedback and what steps should be taken to improve myself.

1 reply
Cristen April 20th, 2021

@cuteeeezombieeee
I really like how your answer has all the relevants points and is concise to boot! That's honestly amazing!blush

shallowWater7547 May 16th, 2021

@cuteeeezombieeee

You have expressed your views very well!

LovetoGod May 24th, 2021

@cuteeeezombieeee

You have really explained your answer very well. I am agree with you. And I really like that how you have focused mainly on feelings which can be really difficult to accept ❤

magicmango26 March 20th, 2022

Asking for feedback is a great idea!

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Cristen April 20th, 2021

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond?
Talk to the leader – I would patiently ask them for feedback on what areas I lack and need to work on, in order for me to get the role the next time I apply. I would also be sure to not take it personally, since the role may not have been the right fit for me or I might just not have been ready to take the role yet.

Take some self-care – Naturally I would be upset on finding out that I was not given the role initially. Hence, it would be best for me to take some time off from 7 Cups so that I can reflect, recharge and return stronger! Another great option would be to talk to a peer supporter for some after-care.

Get a mentor – This would be the best way for me to grow personally and professionally as an active listener and a member of the 7 Cups community, since a mentor can provide me with much needed guidance on how to achieve a role that is most suitable for me.

What would you say to the leader who has informed you?
Firstly, I would thank them for letting me know and for the opportunity. Secondly, I would ask for pointers on what I need to do to be a right fit for the role or alternatively, ask if they have any idea on what other roles, if any would be suitable for me.

1 reply
giggleZebra2708 April 21st, 2021

@Cristen

Well put and all your tips for improvement is really informative

Wishing you the very best

1 reply
Cristen May 12th, 2021

@giggleZebra2708
Thank you so much! All the best to you in the program too! blush

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shallowWater7547 May 16th, 2021

@Cristen

heyy! I really appreciate that how you have highlighted the three specific points and have described them so well!

LovetoGod May 24th, 2021

@Cristen

I really like one thing about your answer that how you have mentioned points. And you have really explained it very good 😊

rriyad February 7th, 2022

@Cristen

amazing !

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giggleZebra2708 April 21st, 2021

@Heather225

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

When I find out that I was not given the role that I applied to, I would try to reflect on where I might have missed with the specific requirements. I will try my very best to work on those requirements and do the very best to work on the given role. I would thank the leader for the opportunity and ask them for their feedback to learn where I might have lagged for my intended position.

1 reply
May 22nd, 2021

@giggleZebra2708 Self-reflection and pulling feedback sound good approach of handling the situation.

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confidentpanda April 22nd, 2021

Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

I think you should respond in a calm matter, because getting angry at the leader will not help your case. I would ask the leader for feedback and how i can do better next time or what other role they feel would suit me better.

2 replies
shallowWater7547 May 16th, 2021

@Lww873

yeah! I agree with you that getting angry at the leader won't help us in any way

peacefulIris56 May 22nd, 2021

@Lww873 I like that you are open to feedback and that you are willing to explore other options when things don't work out. Having good communication helps with these things.

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FawkesCare12 May 7th, 2021

Hello friends :)

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

I think I’d be a bit sad, initially. Then I’d take a moment to understand why I didn’t get the role (after taking a comfort coffee and a good book to read).

I’d thank the leader and ask them if possible, to give some feedback as to how I can improve upon it. I suppose the leader who has to give the news would be in a tough position than me.

I’d probably then reapply for another role because there is no shortage of roles here :) and I may be better suited to another role than the one I’d initially applied for.

2 replies
lueurspace May 19th, 2021

@FawkesCare12

Hey, I like how you mention that you would take time to understand why you didn't get the role - drinking coffee and read a good book, that definitely sounds comforting and we all deserve to go easy on ourselves after hearing not-so-pleasant news. And I like how you also understand that giving feedback is not as easy! I hear you on that, it may be so hard to even word it properly so that you don't discourage the other person, it's very important to give feedback properly! I absolutely love your answer! There could also be other roles we may enjoy taking up. Thank you so much for sharing, you helped me expand my thinking a bit more on this!

You can't give your life more time, so give the time you have, more life.

1 reply
FawkesCare12 May 19th, 2021

@lueurspace

Aww.. that's very sweet of you!! Yes, completely agree with you on the care to be taken when phrasing feedback.

Hope you have an amazing day ahead :)

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Ethan May 30th, 2021

@FawkesCare12 I love your little mention of coffee and a nice book to read! Self-care is so important especially after news that might make you a lil upset.

1 reply
FawkesCare12 May 30th, 2021

@IcedEthan Hehe.. they're my magical go-tos most of the time

Hope you are practicing self care too :)

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Suryansh May 7th, 2021

Hello Everyone!

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

Regardless, the dismissal is for a role on 7 Cups or for any application in our reality, it certainly stings. I would feel down however I would acknowledge it. I trust and accept the choice of pioneers and I comprehend that they have picked an individual best fit for the job.

I would say thanks to them for taking their time to inform me. I will ask them for feedback so I could become more acquainted with what are the capacities and abilities I was missing and the focuses where I could chip away at prior to applying for the role again. I would likewise set aside some effort to consider my inclinations forward and will coordinate my energy toward that path as my definitive objective is to offer help to the peoples and give assistance to 7 Cups to its central goal. In the event that I would feel actually quite sad, I will either get some self-care break or contact Peer Supporters to share my sentiments and have a reviving talk with them.

Thank You!

Be the change that you wish to see in the world.

DigitalKnight May 10th, 2021

@Heather225

I would talk to them and ask them the following questions:

Am i a good fit?

why was i rejected?

what are the areas i need to improve before applying again?

what are some other roles that i might be more suitable for?

After getting the feedback i will evalute the data and will try to improve my skills and look out for roles that might be more suitable for me.

1 reply
lueurspace May 19th, 2021

@DigitalKnight

That seems very thorough, I like the questions you'd be open to asking! You seem to be curious about where you can improve more on and that's very much like me as well - and something a leader should be open for. I do hope we are all provided with feedback that helps us grow to be better and hopefully we will get everything we want, all in right time

You can't give your life more time, so give the time you have, more life.

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shallowWater7547 May 14th, 2021

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

I will be a little sad but i will try to understand that i didn't get the role because i was not good for it. and, that everyone grows and accomplishes things at different time. How can i use the feedback to improve myself. I would like to thank the leader and will ask for feedback. where i was wrong and how can i improve.

1 reply
Ethan May 30th, 2021

@shallowWater7547 Feeling upset about not getting a role is 100% valid! It is good that you would ask for feedback to see what areas you might need to improve on.

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Enbyowl May 16th, 2021

I think you should respond with grace even if you aren’t happy about it. I would respond with “Okay, thank you for telling me. Can I ask what I can improve on?”

mamtasha22 May 18th, 2021

@Heather225 If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? It is definitely upsetting to find out but the leaders have rejected me for a reason and I still have space to learn and grow if I get rejected for a role I will ask for feedback and I will improve What would you say to the leader who has informed you? I would thank them for letting me know and ask for feedback on where I can improve and when can I try again for the role

1 reply
Ethan May 30th, 2021

@mamtasha22 It can for sure be upsetting, and that is totally okay. I'm proud of you for noticing that and also noticing that you can ask for feedback to help yourself improve <3

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