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Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #5) Approaching Conflict Resolution: Dealing with Issues Directly

Heather225 August 7th, 2020

Please note: In order to successfully complete Course 2, you must respond to this post. Your comment/response should answer the questions/shows that you completed the given activity (if any). Read the post carefully and follow the instructions given. Save your responses to a document that you can later refer to. You will need to copy/paste your response in the course evaluation form at the end of each course to show that you have done the work and to refresh your memory.
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Any  community is going to go through challenges and sometimes people are going to be in conflict with one another or have disagreements. All of that is okay and should be welcomed and even expected. The trick is to figure out what is the best way to address these issues so that we can continue to grow individually and as a community. Most ethical codes for professions recommend approaching the person that you have an issue with to try to resolve it with them first. If you feel safe and comfortable, then that is the best way to go. Here are some other helpful guidelines for conflict resolution brought to you by @Tazzie (original post)!

â  Step back and slow down
â  Avoid repeating unhelpful behaviors in conflicts.
â  Habits can be changed through awareness.
â  Think before you put your words across in order to avoid something that will escalate the conflict.

â  Show clarity regarding your intentions and goals for the conversation
â  Avoid blaming or changing another person's point of view.
â  Listen to learn something new and express your views and feelings professionally.

â  Avoid assumptions and ask questions to explore the other persons story
â  Listen to the person on the opposite end as they will more likely try to understand you.
â  Do not convince them you are right.
â  Be aware of potential barriers to listening.

â  Express your feelings without holding the other person accountable for the conflict
â  Use I statements to express yourself.
â  State a feeling rather than judging.

â  Be responsible for your assumptions
â  On the internet, messages can be interpreted in several ways. To think that your beliefs and conclusions about  others are the truth, will only escalate the conflict.
â  Share your interpretation of the messages received.

â  Find a common ground
â Reaching a common ground will make it easier to resolve the conflict and will diffuse defensiveness.

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Question time!

1.) Have you ever been on either side of conflict resolution situation? How did you resolve it?
2.)  Can you think of any tips  we haven't listed to facilitate healthy conflict-resolution?

After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next post here! You must take part in the brainstorming/activities given in all of these posts to successfully complete the program.


This post is brought to you by the Leadership Development Program Team, find out more information about the program here.

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Livingtohelplive January 30th, 2022

Hello there!:)


Oh Yeah, sure, i can not even count The number of times i have. I think no matter who you are Or Where you are from, you experience conflicts everyday in more Or less ordinary life.

I usually base conflicts resolutions on The communication, setting boundaries and staying calm and open minded as Well as open hearted.

I think that most of the people, even including me, go during any conflict hard and race within their own view and opinion. I think it might be important, and that is not mentioned in this post, to empathize and simply put your self metaphorically to your oponents shoes.


Sending energy and strenght!

Lots of love,

🌸Hana🌸

1 reply
rrretsuko February 5th, 2022

@Livingtohelplive that's true ! <3 everyone experiences conflict at some point in their lives and i do think that this is inevitable. but there are always ways to de-escalate it and resolve that conflict :) i agree with you !

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anjellyna January 30th, 2022

@Heather225

1.) Have you ever been on either side of conflict resolution situation? How did you resolve it?

We expressed our feelings in a calm and clear manner, and took accountability for the things we did wrong. As well, we brainstormed preventative measures so that the same situation does not happen again.

2.) Can you think of any tips we haven't listed to facilitate healthy conflict-resolution?

Yes! I think that positive reinforcement is really important. After the conflict is resolved, saying something reassuring, or a comment like "we handled that well as a team!" or "love you!" can help reestablish a comfortable atmosphere.

1 reply
rrretsuko February 5th, 2022

@anjellyna i like that you both took accountability when you acknowledged that you weren't right about certain things :) that takes a lot of effort and understanding ! that's awesome <3

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rriyad February 2nd, 2022

@Heather225


1.) Have you ever been on either side of conflict resolution situation? How did you resolve it?

Ans. Yeah, it happens many times. When i found myself in conflict, I try to understand others perspective and respect them as well.


2.)  Can you think of any tips  we haven't listed to facilitate healthy conflict-resolution?

Ans. Respect others opinion.


1 reply
rrretsuko February 5th, 2022

@rriyad understanding the perspective and opinions of others is really helpful in de-escalating situations and resolving conflict :) it may be hard to do at first, but it gets easier when it is practiced !

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rrretsuko February 5th, 2022

@Heather225

1. i have been on both sides of conflict situations <3 i resolve conflicts by trying to listen to the other person involved through de-escalating :) i do my best to listen to their side of the story, because afterwards, i know i'm gonna feel a lot better not having it on my mind so much anymore ! i'm here to create connections and friendships-- not destroy possible ones.

2. finding the root of the conflict and trying to see why it is happening can also help facilitate healthy conflict-resolution ! often times when you discover this, de-escalating the situation becomes much easier :) <3

nessa104 February 10th, 2022

@Heather225

Have you ever been on either side of conflict resolution situation? How did you resolve it?

Yes, I have! I think by being open and transparent about intention and settling on common ground,to not create more your chaos

2. Can you think of any tips we haven't listed to facilitate healthy conflict-resolution?

I think taking time and keeping feeling aside and giving them space, giving them space understanding and understanding their perspective is very helpful .


1 reply
MelodyoftheOcean May 20th, 2022

@nessa104

Giving everyone their space is so important Nessa, thank you for saying that!

❤️

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CaringEzra February 14th, 2022

1. Have you ever been on either side of a conflict resolution situation? How did you resolve it?

I wouldn't say that I get into conflicts too often but of course, they are inevitable. To resolve it is to have a calm conversation, listening to each other. Try to use I feel statements and empathize with the other person. Lots of conflicts stem from misunderstandings and they need to be talked out. Or disagreements where it is important to come into the conversation knowing that you are going to have to give and compromise. Finding common ground with an open mind and taking ownership when you are wrong can be helpful.

2. Can you think of any tips we haven't listed to facilitate healthy conflict resolution?

I think that all of the tips I can think of have been listed but here are some observations and maybe there is a tip in here :p Whenever there is a conflict, listening to the other person, hearing their side of the story, often goes out the window fast. Sometimes insults are thrown around, exaggerated truths, and treating each other poorly. The first instinct is to defend oneself and show their side of the story and how they are right. They feel they are not being heard and that the only way they will be is through how loud they are. Only to get more upset when told to shut up so then things are said that are meant. I have seen people make hurtful comments and then the other person responds with the thought of “I'm gonna say something to hurt you like you just hurt me.” So obviously this is how to not deal with conflict. So we can learn when in a conflict I think that it is best to take a breath. Remember that you will get to share your side after. If things get heated try taking a break when people aren't upset and emotions high.

Zahraa000 February 21st, 2022

1.)Have you ever been on either side of conflict resolution situation? How did you resolve it ?

Yes I was on one side of the conflict, I was clear about intentions and goals in the conversation and I avoided changing people's point of view while keeping my view of the problem and avoiding assumptions and asking questions to explore other people's stories! I did not convince them that I was right, but rather let them know that for themselves, so that the problem would be solved by satisfying both parties.


2-) Can you think of any tips  we haven’t listed to facilitate healthy conflict- resolutions?


My advice is to listen better and let him speak everything inside him and be responsible for my assumptions with them and do not forget the importance of sympathy at this stage by separating the action from the subject so that I can solve the problem in a better way!

1 reply
MelodyoftheOcean May 20th, 2022

@Zahraa000

Sympathy can make discussion way more comfortable and less judgemental, I agree! 💜

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NoelleListens February 26th, 2022

@Heather225

  1. Yes, I have been on either side of a conflict resolution situation. I resolved it by talking with the person and figuring out how to move forward and what to do in order to have a safe and respectful environment.
  2. My tip to facilitate healthy conflict-resolution is to not talk about what happened that led to the conflict. Don’t bring up the past and say who did this and that.
1 reply
MrS7v7n April 25th, 2022

@NoelleListens

I like your perspective here Noelle.

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glowingSoul93 February 27th, 2022

I have been on the other side of a conflict it wasn’t a very pleasant one because I almost got fired but honestly that didn’t happen, I showed all of my information I still had from the conflict and it wasn’t at a point where it was major but honestly having my name through the ringer stunk. I just gave all of the information I had and I cleared my name completely. No all of the tips are great there isn’t one that I can think of to add.

1 reply
MrS7v7n April 25th, 2022

@glowingSoul93

I'm glad you had your name cleared Glowing, that's good to hear, and I'm sorry you had to go through that.

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magicmango26 March 20th, 2022

@Heather225

1. Yes, I have been in many of these situations. An example is when I was working on a group project for one of my classes with two other girls. Both of these girls did not get along due to a prior conflict. In order to make sure that our project would get done with maximum efficiency, I sat with my partners and listened to both of their concerns with one another and then listened as they spoke with one another about their ongoing feud. Ultimately, the girls were able to put aside their differences and we were able to turn in a wonderful group project!

2. One tip is to always make sure to remain neutral in a situation where you have two other parties who are unhappy with one another. Try not to take sides!

1 reply
KBeauty12 April 4th, 2022

@magicmango26

Yes, being a mediator is helpful in these situations

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