Eva’s Crazy Mind
i’ve wanted to make a forum post like that for quite a while now, but never brought myself to actually make it. here i will write up all sorts of thoughts and vents, everything i need to get off my mind. it’s not gonna be positive or motivational, not even close. i personally don’t recommend reading it just because it doesn’t help lol. you’re welcome to read, replies are okay, just be aware that it’s gonna be a pretty dark place. i don’t usually ask for help despite telling everybody to. idk why. i’m not a very good example of what’s right to do. TW just in case, not planning to go that far but who knows.
i’m making myself this space because sometimes you can feel lonely while being surrounded by a million people and that’s nobody’s fault.
best wishes to you. ❤️
ever feel guilty talking about smiling or laughing or having a good time just because you’re “supposed to be doing bad”? even if it’s so rarely? i do.
@justmeeva At times yes. I think it's because depression and d*ath (ideation/tendencies) are often portrayed with laying on the couch crying unconsolably in the same clothes you wore for a week. But there are still moments of joy and silliness. Like a Sunbeam breaking through the clouds for the briefest of moments. A reprieve. It's okay to enjoy those little moments.
why can't i have a talent, something to be proud of, a single skill, a n y t h i n g?
@justmeeva Perhaps you just haven't found what speaks to you just yet. Sometimes it can take time to find it.
“pov: home is an escape from school but school is an escape from home.”
@justmeeva
it's like there's no actual escape from the ***. :')
we had to write a 200 word essay. we had 1 hour. my mind was blank. i had a few sentences, i had the title (which we were given.). the entire time, this entire 60 minutes, all i had were those few sentences in my notebook. what’s funny, is that the teacher walked by me so many times. i saw her looking over to me. but she didn’t say anything. she just walked by. she didn’t come to me. she didn’t care. she went to others tho. i- don’t know what to think.
“i saw them standing right there
kinda thought they might care”
but like, literally.
