In the Corner

Tw- sui-cide, death, murder etc

This is sad but i needed to

I wont name him, because i didnt personally know him and I dont have that right. I'll call him R.

His name meant steadfast.

He was 17 years old. Right now, he would have been 19.

They never announced how, or what, happened.

A was my brother in religion and a student of my school. My teachers were his teachers. My friend's brother was his friend. I might have passed him in the hall.

He was found...with a rope...

Allegedly, a friend of his had come to visit and left, allegedly, "disguised as a girl"

Police declared it was not su-cide

You will barely find a report online. It will mention su-cide. 

Teachers gave us warnings. Be careful. Please always walk in groups. Dont assume ur safe. Please be careful.

He was 17 years old, an year older than my sister that year, and no one knows for sure how he d-ed

He is remembered. He was grieved by several, almost everyone in my school. We have not forgotten him. His departure occured in Ramadhan, and we remember. It is all there is left to do for him anymore.

May this never happen again 😞 

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Rainbow room is filled with noone but mods nowadays :/ i think thats kinda sad

You know the frnd who uses full stops when shes mad/upset, whcih is why if someone uses too many full stops i assume theyre mad/upset?

She sent me nothing but a fullstop replying to an old, old msg from a chat i cant see anynore, at 1.30 (in her country) last night

What 

Am

I 

Supposed

To

Do

With

That?

Things ive been called in cups rooms:

—> Karen (for telling the rules)

—> compared to an abusive mother (ah, great, doesnt that make me feel like an awful human being)

—> killjoy 

—> i dont remember the exact words anymore, but it was because i said the rules, again

And ofcourse the wonderful phrase, 

f—- off! 

Is this what customer service is like?/jk

im fine, ofcourse. Been called/told way worse. The abusive mom comment hurt- still does- but my sis also told me that id be the type or teacher that would yell about every small thing, so those are kind of similar, hmmm? 

But there shldnt be name calling anyways

I have to do so much pss today its unbelieveable nd im still sick 

o h b o y :p 

@unassumingEyes pss is short for pakistan social studies 

u know

cause pakistan board xD

Im alive! After all that social studies!! Whaaat :p

ill probably forget everything tomorrow 

what wld my mom say if i failed 🤔🤔

im not gonna fail stop being ridiculous why wld i fail *nervous laugh*

Im alive! After all that social studies!! Whaaat :p

ill probably forget everything tomorrow 

what wld my mom say if i failed 🤔🤔

im not gonna fail stop being ridiculous why wld i fail *nervous laugh*

Soo yesterday was vv stressful and my health was done but the exam was okay 

and 

i made friends? Or atleast one friend idk bout the others??

and her name

is the name of a main character

in a book i was writing but put on pause till i figure sm technical things out

huhh 

@unassumingEyes im also less stressed cuz that was the hardest exam i think the others will be manageable now

Yeah, okay

Um

Moving part 2 today

In like 3 hours-

Gonna leave relatives home

Um

Kinda dont want to

Cousins are...the only part of my day left to look forward to? Theyre the only ones who come to check up on me when im sitting in the room all day studying. Mom and sis just come by sometimes to tell me to focus. 

I just

Im supposed to get used to 

Not waving at my 14yr old cousin when we both wake up at like 3am

Not getting jumpscares from my uncle because he cant lower his voice even when he tried

Not have my older cousin peak in the room, and either turn off the lights as a joke, or ask me how much is left

Not have all my cousins enter the room with their schoolwork so we can all study together 

Not grin at my 12yr old cousins teasing, my 10yr old cousins bossiness, my 7yr old cousins creativity 

Im just supposed to Not?

Being in your own home, with your own privacy, is comforting, I agree

But then ill just be expected to study all day

Without a single person checking in to see if im okay

Thats

Hard

Really hard

@unassumingEyes

*leaves a hug for eyes buddy to let her know i’ve been thinking of her and i miss her.* 

@unassumingEyes 

i was literally just thinking of you and how it felt so long, welcome back 🩷

@justmeeva @LoveMyMoonflowers @iloveyouxx 

Huggs missed yall i meant to post or come on here but like

Net was 

T r a s h 😞😞

Been a hectic two days but my aunt came by lots to help and clear the atmosphere

Had a fight with my sis but made (?) Up 

(Its always (?) Made up with her lol neither of us apologize or talk about it-)

Update 1: i hv been a bit down in physical health

Update 2: i hv been a bit down in mental health (hah-)

But im....sort of okay 

I found a few safe spaces in the house today so theres that ^_^. Need smth since i dont hv school anymore 

Andd an update i think @iloveyouxx will find agreeable 🙃 im getting a break! Not a no-study-or-think-about-it break, but theres a pause in exams till after Eid

So if i work hard rn and focus on studying i can enjoy eid ^_^

@unassumingEyes

hugs💜awe it’s okie friend we happy to see you back🩷

ngl same ;-; me and my brother never apologize but then again I don’t think we’re ever like *okay* when it comes to each other either ;-;🤍

awwwe :')❤️I really hope you can start feeling better soon >:❤️

im glad you found sum safe spaces :0💕I think having a safe space/s is something a lot of peoples need :P even if they don’t know it yet but I’m glad you found a couple🩷

:0 yussssss finallyyyyy :DDD🎉🎉🎉💖💖ou wait you’re still gonna study TvT🤍? hm well it’s sumthing💜!! happy for yuuu💕can yu try to study at least a lil less and take it easy TvT since there aren’t any exams going around atm :')💙?

*cheering for yuu*💖🎉🎉📣📣👏👏💖_{*wOoooohhOoOo gOooo eyEsSssssss*😛🎉🎉💖}

@iloveyouxx

Go nadia too 🎉🎉 life is still a challenge so ill cheer for you🎉🎉🎉

See my dads visiting on eid nd after that itll be a few months before we see him again so i want to make sure i do v.v.v.v little study on eid days so these 3days imma study v.v.v.v much so ill be free later. Stressful but itll worth it....probablyy 🙃

Uhhh i always forget everything i was gonna say half way throughh

Ummm

Missed u tons 🩷

My sis is s o complicated i d e k how i feel about her. I think its like, she tries but 

Shes still my mother's daughter (do people think that of me?) And her favourite so shes "learned" (...how to be mean sometimes...)

We dont apologize. Today my sisters "apology" was advice (shes not a patient teacher, altho shes a good one, so her advice is always good nd useful). I "apologized" once by arranging her socks for her. We get by, i guess.

(Think think think what else was i going to say?)

Im sorry bout u nd ur brother. Siblings are so complicated...

(Im going to have to reread ur response to remember aaah xD. Will make another post if i missed smth, hugs if okii)

@unassumingEyes

XD yk smth a lotta cupsers do is they copy paste the persuns reply to theirs then reply from there- once they reply to a part of it they delete that part- like from the other persuns part- I’m not making sense xD lemme demonstrate🩷

Go nadia too 🎉🎉 life is still a challenge so ill cheer for you🎉🎉🎉

awe haha yayyy🎉🎉🎉🥖🥖🥖💖🎉🎉friend I’m sorry to say so randomly but- today my best friend on cups died❤️and idk.. it just- hurts so bad :') but it made me think about yu and how much I appreciate yu and just all of you guys❤️thankyou for being here❤️

See my dads visiting on eid nd after that itll be a few months before we see him again so i want to make sure i do v.v.v.v little study on eid days so these 3days imma study v.v.v.v much so ill be free later. Stressful but itll worth it....probablyy 🙃

It’s so sweet that you wanna do that hehe🩷but but eyesfrend don’t study too much or your grannybody really will retire lmao D:❤️

Uhhh i always forget everything i was gonna say half way throughh

Ummm

xD

Missed u tons 🩷

missed you more🩷these days especially :') I really have🩷

My sis is s o complicated i d e k how i feel about her. I think its like, she tries but 

Shes still my mother's daughter (do people think that of me?) And her favourite so shes "learned" (...how to be mean sometimes...)

awe yuh that’s a lot of people at this point..sumtimes it’s not always "all they’ve ever known" yk but it’s just- I think you explained that better than me lol :P she’s your mothers daughter :')💜

We dont apologize. Today my sisters "apology" was advice (shes not a patient teacher, altho shes a good one, so her advice is always good nd useful). I "apologized" once by arranging her socks for her. We get by, i guess.

lolll this reminds me of the parents that apologize with food :P💙but actually this isn’t bad heh- it’s better than the people that keep pretending it’s okay until it just all goes crashing down- :P💜

(Think think think what else was i going to say?)

Im sorry bout u nd ur brother. Siblings are so complicated...

tru :P siblings are- very complicated indeed :PPP

(Im going to have to reread ur response to remember aaah xD. Will make another post if i missed smth, hugs if okii)

huggsssss💗💗

so basically they reply to each bit like that then delete in this case would be the ones colored ✨this✨after replying to it and that would leave just your responses to each bit of what that persun said :P❤️it’s what I do lol <3 it’s pretty easy but if you find it complicated that okie too 💜anything works :0

@iloveyouxx

That makes sense and thank you 🩷 Thank you for being here too frnd 🩷 im sorry bout ur cups friend (and slightly paranoid- im gonna be checking on my frnds for a bit now why am i like this-)

No seriously im really really sorry bout ur frnd 😞

Granny body already started retirement might as well use whats left of it/hj

Aw 🩷 i kept thinking of all my cups frndos but everytime it ried cups wouldnt load

Yeah. I hope im more my fathers daughter lol.

Im glad we dont pretend yea. But i feel like we should talk about our arguments when calmer too. See what went wrong and where. Im a firm believer of open communication i guess. Too many msiunderstandings because of people not just *saying* it, you know? But my sis thinks thats all nonsense i guess so- little gestures. Quiet "im sorrys". Helps ur mood/relationship yeah. But the problems still left unsolved that way imo

( i poofed cause stomach ache-)

@unassumingEyes

(lolll :P xD you knew them hehe :') and btw they didn’t *off* themselves..they were- TW..murdered :')❤️I loved them so much (platonically) and idk. they deactivated their M and L so all their posts are gone and their profile and everything.❤️thankyou friend❤️and lol answering your qs I’m the same haha it’s okie :0🩷)

nouuuuuu TvT ahh maybe it is too late for your granny body😭

lol hehe I hope I’m more my mothers daughter xD depends on the family :P🩷.

hm trueee I agree :0 can you tell her- that you did tell them you were gonna be up? cos that makes the beginning problem seem unnecessary and wouldn’t have been there if your sis listened <3? maybe she’d understand that but idk..your call ofc💜 

( D: I hope the pain goes away soon and ✨*tries to spell the new word*✨ indegestion:P? too >: <3 )

@iloveyouxx

I told her that id told them i was going up like 20 times she didnt care :/

(Can i ask- how do u know the tw cause of death? Because. Idk. I just wanted to ask. Sorry. 

Im going to check...whos...missing..)

@unassumingEyes

im really sorry friend😞idk what yu can do atp >: but I know you tried💜

(don’t apologize lovely🩷we were talking before she deactivated her L. and well it’s a whole story idk how to explain. I wrote a whole thing explaining it but just deleted it :') but yeah we were talking ofc <3)

@iloveyouxx

that sounds scary. Im sorry. Love you frnd 🩷

@iloveyouxx

(Ah, thats what i forgot-)

Safe spaces are vvv important i agree. And i do very much need to get away from mom and sis sometimes. Theyre so ... impatient. Mood swings so fast. So confusing. Like im always asking, what did i do wrong? But all i get is tw yelling. School was a longer get away- 6 hours away from them, 6 hours not watching my everymove to get it right. Im dumping, sorry-. Anyways. If not school, well, atleast i get this.

Till they find the safe spaces. I have another in mind though- noone is every going to the backside of our house 🤔🤔 ill check it out tomorrow 🙃



@unassumingEyes

I was gonna be like "omg your school was 6 hours away D:" but then I realize you meant school hours ;-;💜

friend you can dump all you want🩷(lol :P). really tho- it’s your space too and mainly- say whatever you need/want to <3

i hope your new safe place makes you feel *safe* :0❤️and calm if anything <3 without overthinking about your mom/sister :P❤️or having to put up with all the yelling <3 I think yu could use a space like that friend and if it makes you feel safe then I’m happy for yu❤️

@iloveyouxx

thank u frnd 🩷

6 hours away :0 it used to be 6 minutes :0 xD no school rn tho

@unassumingEyes

_{XD my schools less than a minute away :P I walk there so yus v literally😭it’s like kinda depressing for sum reasun tho TvT the second you leave my apartment and just look in a direction you see my school :P a couple of steps away :'P}

@iloveyouxx

Yea i used to walk too. But it was a bit far, accross the road etc

 Did i spell across right? Both times xD

To ur other post "indigestion" 

As in, i cnt digest it hehe thats what it is

I wld like seeing my school so close. But u know. Different schools :p

...why did they delete my forum post? 

Again and again and again

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Yall must be thinking i just got back and im already an emotional mess 

Well

Yes i am-

Just

My sis lured me outside at one point today to hit me. That wasnt the reason of the fight but it was the fight :/

And 

I poofed for like an hour today cause my stomach hurt so bad and no one noticed :/

Told you no one checks in on me here 😞

@unassumingEyes

D: what D: are you okay now😞?

>: do you know what could’ve caused your stomach to hurt that bad >:💜I would’ve noticed :') <3

😞they really should..not exactly notice when you’re not okay but at least try.. :')🩷I’m sorry eyesbuddy- your family should’ve tried to check on you if they could >:🩷

@iloveyouxx

Indigestion :p i always get it when i leave kwt. Mom says to eat normally because its been 2months since we left kwt, but stomach still wont settle down. I managed to finish dinner today so thats smth. I think thats why my appetite was gone in between too 🤔

I just. My 16yr old cousin cld pause in her studies to peak in and see how its going. My 14yr old cousin can wave at me or ask me how much studies is left when he passes by. My uncle can pop in to ask me how im feeling when he gets back from work everyday. My 7yr old cousin brings me leaves and flowers and balloons from outside because im in the room studying so long and missing out so much

And mom and sis just...dont bother. Dont notice. I told both of them today that im going upstairs, please call me when the workers that had to come today arrive so i cn come back down. When the workers came, my sis came back and yelled at me for not telling anyone i was up. I told both of them?? And that was the fight, and why she lured me out to hit me and yeah like what :/ 

@unassumingEyes

I had to google that TvT🤍then I googled what it felt like- it sounds do painful omg😭why do I sumtimes feel like I literally have barely any experience with physical pain TvT I didn’t know what this indigestion thing was till now and still never gotten a headache :P also my brother keeps complaining about back/shoulder pain and I’m like😭but anyway- it reallly does sound painfulll I’m sorry D:💜2months :') maybe your grannybody is tryna hint at smth atp like :P you’re always in pain smh :')❤️‍🩹

😞this really is.. so sad :')💜

yu told both of them.. :P howd you not tell anyone you were up :')-? you literally.- TvT🩷I’m happy you made up🩷tho this is a pretty T^T sibling thing to do >:💜the fact she hit you too for no real reason either :')💜but issokie I guess💙life goes onnn :PP I hope you’re okie <3 

@iloveyouxx

It wasnt the hitting that bother me i guess lol  (sisters lol) it was luring me. She pretended it was for work. She was actually taking me smwhere mom cldnt see so she cld hit me. I really didnt like the deception.

They ignore evrything i say than when it comes to a head yell at me for not telling them things i told them. They never listen.

Im glad u dont get much physical pain

Honestly, nadia, im weak. That may sound like a small statement but its difficult for me to admit that. Im weak, ive probably become tw underweight again, and you just...wouldnt want to see my body like at all. Thin thin bones. Ive got nothing on me and im so insulted for it 24/7 i cnt even admit it to myself without tearing up. But its true, and the stress isnt helping, and im so tired all the time now, and i got up today and my vision just clouded so bad it triggered a headache and I do need a break but i cant get one yet and im dumoing again

Ughhhhhhh

Sorry-

I think two days without venting made the guilt of venting come back in full lol.

(Two ppl in my life called me wise. Really, tho? Me? Maybe a little bit more than whats average for my age but thats...the most i cn believe. Me? Wise? Idek how to mop)

@iloveyouxx i dont want to ask bcz it was today nd it feels insensitive but

Cn u tell? Who?

Sorry, im sorry

Does anyone know any forum mods?

@unassumingEyes

_{@ tommy is a big one 🤍 I pm them every time I have a qs about anything Forum related :P}

@iloveyouxx

https://www.7cups.com/@tommy

@unassumingEyes ❤️