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- What is Your Safe Place?
What is Your Safe Place?
Readers,
For many of us, having a safe place to land can be the difference between traumatic events or a full-blown episode.
Is there a place that allows you to de-escalate when you feel you are losing control? Where do you feel most safe and comfortable?
♡
Probably when i go walking or when im helping at the animal shelter.
My episodes are usually bad. & hurting myself is a big one. I try to stay calm by walking or listening to the sound of a thunderstorm for sleep on a laptop. (: that helps me from going to being fine, to getting to irritated, & star hitting myself. ): @blitheSun94
@helpfulVoiceluciilandoe Great ways of coping!!
@blitheSun94, a safe place can be a room , a corner , a chair , a shady part of the garden or even your favourite coffee shop. I call it my little heaven. Having a safe place is really important because when you are at this place , it help you to rearrange your thoughts , make plans and many other things as you feel this place protects you and enables you to function well. Do you know blithe, if you are far away from your safe place, then maybe you could practise thinking about it to create the feeling of safe which in turn will allow your thoughts n feelings to start funtioning again. But it is really important to talk to someone if you constantly have the need or seek to be in your safe place and connot function without it.
@faithlove1111
An important point indeed! I believe what you are describing is referred to as "mindfulness", and does in fact take a ton of practice. With this, however, you come to know the sanctuary you carry inside yourself and more importantly, how to access it anytime.
@Kaylei72 I'm glade you have a safe place. I love my bed too.
Looking back over the years, I'd say 'anywhere I can be alone with my thoughts' is the best answer.
Before I injured my knee 3yrs ago I'd go running or biking for a couple hours. to escape into my brain. I'm able to reach more or less the same state through meditation. Every year I try to take 2 weeks off to unplug, and either go to the campground 20min from city limits, or just go driving, or stay around and go to the quiet spots around here.
Couple times in this last 9 months on the journey of a thousand steps, I've gone on 3-4hr drives down the highway JUST for the solitude. Won't be able to go camping for a couple weeks, until it warms up here in june or so.
@Phoenix84
Very well done! These are excellent coping skills. I can very much relate to the need for solitude. Sometimes I'll even hide in the bathroom if that's my only option. Which usually turns into a bubble bath. :) I admire your strength of character and awareness of needs.
@blitheSun94
Helps to have been at this a while. I've had the time to learn by trial and error (and error, and error, and error... ).
@Phoenix84
of course! We humans have very few inherent skills and must practice, practice, practice.
@blitheSun94
I'm sure if you asked my family, there have been a number of times I would have failed a Turing test over the last 16-17yrs.
When I lay my head on my husbands chest to hear his heartbeat. Or sitting with my cat.
I don't get to go there very often, but a place where I get re-centered and calmer and in touch with God is the Gardens at the Getty Center. There's a beautiful stream running through the garden, and this one spot where I can sit by the bridge and surruptitiously (as long as security isn't watching) dip my feet in. It's the most calming thing. I sit there for hours, reading and journaling and just... existing.
@RoseD I love that garden! Especially the different sounds the water makes as it runs through the altering stream designs. I don;t live in California, but the next time I visit, I'm definitely going back there.
@ladylazarus1971 Yes! It's a lovely place. And there's lots of shady spots to sit against the cool, polished granite, too. I hope you get to rest there again sometime soon.
@ladylazarus1971
It's so neat that you know what she's talking about!
@RoseD
What a great way to calm down. I wish I was closer to a water source like the one you describe.
I have never tried to describe it before but I will try.
When feeling overwhelmed or trapped I close my eyes and go to the campfire. It is night time and there are no car, house or street lights around, it is up on a wide hill that has mature trees on the right side. To the left of the trees is a large pond that encompasses the entire top of the hill, except one grassy area and that is where my campfire is. A warm golden,orange glow that makes me feel like I have my own private minature sunshine that offers just the right warmth, light and goodness. Muscles drop their tension and my breathing is a relaxed rhythm. Then I look up and see the ebony sky embellished with glimmering jewels, too many to count. And the moon gives a nod with its silvery light. Cool night air passes gently by and the water laps like a soft drummer. The world of stress and anxiety are far, far from this place.
I don't have a physical place to go - my campfire is available where ever I am in this world.
My safe place is my room. No matter what (most off the time) my family willl knock. Since I'm abused verbally and emotionally it's very comforting and it clears my mind. Even since I'm 14 I still have my two "safe items" my teddy bear and 'blankie' ( who are older then me 😉)
@Turtles089
I love stuffed animals and still use them. I'm almost 30, lol.
My safe place seems to be at my work. :) I read, Listen to members, meditate and I feel safe.
@blitheSun94 I did that last night. Thank you for reminding me of that.
I need to refind my safe place again. Right now so much I happening that I'm scared. Don't feel like I can talk to any friends or family that would understand.
I I was having a stressful day a co-worker taught me what she called Golden Bowl prayer.
She said imagine yourself in your favorite place. Then place your hands face up. Imagine two huge golden bowls coming down from the sky. Place all your troubles all the things that you cannot solve into the golden bowls. My favorite place is a beach. I can hear the waves coming in. I placed all my problems and all the things that I cannot stop into the golden bowls. Then they ascend into heaven the Angels come down and get them. The act of putting the problems in the golden bowls and watching the Angels taking them away somehow gives me relief.
@selfdisciplinedRaspberries9375
What a beautiful visualization practice! Thank you for sharing. :) I am glad to help. Insomnia is one of my biggest hurdles. Bubble baths help me relax and tackle chronic pain so I can sleep better when it does happen. There is a noticable difference when I skip my bath. My quality of life goes down, lol. Bubbles!
@blitheSun94
I would say when staying in bed, laying outside under a tree, or drawing somewhere alone with some music to put on
@blitheSun94
When I am manic and tend to make people mad. I turn off my cell phone and go to bed
@victoriousParadise88
You can sleep when you're manic?
My self place when i'm struggling with my disorder , it's just shut the whole world and sleep alll day
Wow, for being a highlighted post (in my notifications "bell") this was awfully hard to find!
I'll come back later, read, and then post - because 1- it is really late and 2 - I like this topic/question.
Thank you, @missZ for this - even though you are no longer here to read my 'thanks' .... Thank you anyway! <3 Platy
@blitheSun94
Hi Blithe, well again, this was really hard to find :( I'm not sure why. Maybe just not enough time spent searching for specific things in the forum. But again now I've found it, but 1 - it's too late to read through and 2 - I really need to bookmark this spot somehow! Copy/paste the link into my notes maybe.... (sigh, I'm tired!) Good night blithe; good night 7cups. ~ Platy
@cyanPlatypus6370
I really appreciate your meaningful feedback. <3