How do I let go of pent up anger towards an ex?

Ask yourself why you are angry towards your ex and investigate those feelings. Write them down in a journal. Write a letter to you ex (not to actually give) and put all your emotions on the letter and throw it away after. Once you understand why you're so angry, it will be easier to let go. Be aware that you have moved on and are in a different, hopefully better, place and what happened in the past has made you who are today and was necessary for growth.

Take the anger out. Say it, write it replay it with someone and speak all those things you are angry about and then address the pain behind the anger.

For me, i just try to forgive what he has done to me. I know it's hard. But i always thinking that it's useless if i keep angry to him. I have to make up my self. I have to be a positive women, so when he look at me, i'm a different person from what i used to be. And make him regret what he has done

Define pent up anger? Anger is usually stemmed from pain. Either it is someone hurt you or vise versa. I guess forgiveness; even if its not for them, but for you. Acceptance of your new reality; that the person is your ex and a new chapter has begun. Taking happiness from what was good and what was felt, experienced and enjoyed. To see it as a learning opportunity; what not to do.

Anger is understandable in situations where it is justified. But it can be crippling. This can affect most areas of your life. But! You can do a number of things. You can engage in activities that channel all this anger healthily. You could distract yourself from thinking about your experience by taking up challenges. Or you could try meditating and face it head on. You could also focus on your hobbies or interests. It is ultimately your choice. You can choose to let this anger poke its nose into your daily life or you could take it by its horns and defeat it. But please remember, whatever you do, change won't happen within a moment's breath. It takes time. Make peace with it. I wish you a blessed future! :)

As time goes on, it makes it easier for us to let go of anger. There are a few ways I've learned over the years. Since this person is your ex, then it probably wouldn't do you any good trying to speak to that person. But talking about your anger to someone who is unbiased helps. As time goes on, the more experiences you gain, you'll feel that there's more to life ahead of you and letting go and moving on will come naturally... if you let it.

It can be difficult to get past the anger. Once you move towards your own progress path you will feel better.

First of all, have you spoken about them to anyone. If you haven't it may seem a bit like an unfinished book.

Talk about it to someone like a friend or someone here.

For me I had to vent it out and then I had to do the hard part, I had to forgive him so that I could heal and move forward.

Accept any underlying feelings you still might have towards your ex. It's the only way you might realise that the anger you're facing has a source and is not superficial. Once you accept that there is a source for this anger, you would let it go much easily because you would be tending to that source instead of releasing your inner energy on anger.

you cant, it has to go on its own and if you dont at the end, its not like you dont for no reason because they hurt you

Try writing down your negative emotions whenever they come to you. And then write down positive things in your life to replace the negative

You need to remember your worth and remember that not everyone is made like you or for you. You will feel at ease with your decision once you let go of anger and replace it with understanding. The past is the past and everyday is a new opportunity and one day closer to being with your true love. So not regret any of your past experiences they have taught you something and have allowed you to grow and understand yourself as a person.

sometimes we feel so strongly about an ex for a reason, maybe they affected you in several ways ultimately affecting your mental wellbeing during the time you were together and after. the best thing you can do while you heal is understand that its time to move on, you deserve to be happy and healthy and holding onto someone who might have hurt you won't do you any good. you may have to remove yourself completely or as much as possible from their lives completely so that you can heal from whatever inflicted you. its never really a one answer type of deal, this is complicated and you're not the only one who feels this type of heavy anger for an ex, no matter how long its been that one's been apart from an ex.

When you have pent up anger towards an ex, write down all of your feelings, let the paper sit for a couple days, and write more. Make sure you write everything you want to say about the situation. Identify the reason why you are upset. Are you mad because of what they did, or is it a programmed reaction? People don't do what they do because of you. Acknowledge your insecurities and what you could have done differently in the relationship. Then, after you experience the feelings, write about what you want out of a relationship with a spouse.

It's natural to have anger towards an ex because an ex is someone who you allowed yourself to be vulnerable to and after a breakup you can feel many things based on your experience together. If you feel like you were hurt, focusing on forgiving them will help you let go of those feelings. Holding on to those negative emotions only hurts you and not them. But you should also find a way to validate your feelings and look at those emotions honestly. Talking to a close friend, family member, or therapist can help you realize a lot of things about your feelings and can help you see where you are right and wrong to feel certain emotions. Anger can sometimes be viewed as a secondary emotion, so some other emotion could be causing your anger. Try to find the root of your problems because that will help you see the big picture and let go of unnecessary anger. This will help your perspective on your life and your ex, and can help you focus on more positive emotions and things in your life.

There’s a lot of ways to release anger and frustration. 1) you can come here on 7 cups and vent. 2) you can maintain a diary or something and write about your feelings in it. 3) you can talk to a friend or family member about it who’s trustworthy and willing to listen 4) you can pretend that a certain soft toy is your ex and then tell the toy what you’d tell your ex. I guess by following these 4 methods it should be possible for you to release at least a fraction of the pent up anger over your ex

Letting go is difficult but it is the best way to achieve peace with your past and yourself. Recognizing that pent up anger is not good for you is the first step. Talking (out loud) about how you feel about your ex with a friend or a relative helps in relieving your burden. Self-care is the best method. If you don't want to talk about it right away (remember, in the end, when you are ready for it, you must talk to someone for your own good) find activities or hobbies that keep you busy and help you feel calm takes your mind off of your anger. Baking and reading are my hobbies and usually helps me with my stress. Please remember that never bottle up your emotions as it is unhealthy for you. If required, talk to your ex and express your anger.

Anger is always the result of you trying to control something which is in reality out of your control. It becomes super obvious always in relationships, because we will never control the other, simply because the other has choice. Which choice, we can never touch :D As they never can mess with our own choice. So, you see, the biggest problems appear when partners try to enforce their own choice, and they are met with rebellion of course. Then the enforcer (in this case you), will feel anger Because it's natural reaction apparently (look at a baby, when he yells as soon as he feels some discomfort) Apparently is deep rooted in all of us, including animals But, reacting with anger will never solve anything long term. Short term yes, the other gets scared, turns into a slave for a while, but as soon as he or she can, will flee fast, and forever :D Because no one wants to be a slave, basically. So, understanding this biggest source of anger, pent up anger or not, Will clear the way, for you to heal, Choose to respect other's choice, choose to respect the laws (of the universe) Choose to respect the power of choice Choose calm instead of anger Calm is love basically, and cooperation with the universal laws. Admit your own mistake, that you tried to control what is out of your control in reality, with your ex. If you ex chooses to be an idiot, even if you want what's actually best for him or her, Realize that he or she has the right to be stupid, if they so please. And we cannot do shit about it, except a prenup :D

Forgiveness is the first part. Only then can you be at peace and move on. the past is the past and forgiveness will not change what has happened, but it will lead to a new beginning for yourself. Once you forgive, you will start to feel better about yourself. As if you are free. 'I forgive, but I also learn a lesson. I won't hate you, but I'll never get close enough for you to hurt me again. I can't let my forgiveness become foolishness." We learn from our mistakes and hopefully choose people who make us feel better about ourselves. We need to distance ourselves from negative people who only bring us down.

Throw yourself into hobbies you really love, perhaps a sport or a creative activity. This will really help to release some anger because you are forcing yourself to forget about the situation because you are doing something you really enjoy. Sports are great because you could use your anger to fuel your speed or passes. Creativity is a brilliant way to release emotions because you can portray it however you want. A non-naturalistic dance, a magnificent abstract canvas, however you wish to show how you're feeling. Who knows, perhaps you'll discover you're new favourite hobby!

I talked to my friends about it. They would always try and turn the bad times about him into a joke so I would be laughing instead of being mad. Or listen to R&B music while I go for a run but that’s not everyone’s personal cup of tea. I like coloring also ( I know it sounds like such a childish thing to say), so I did that for almost hours on ends sometimes. Again everyone have there methods , just don’t use violence cause that will only help for a couple minutes then your back to feeling hurt again

Find a way to express it. In dance or art or something that you enjoy that you feel really communicates with your soul. Paint in all red, dance to metal music, sing every empowerment song you can think of. Find your way to express anger through any sort of outlet. That's really helped me in the past, being able to take the anger inside of my body and mind and place it somewhere outwardly. When it was outside of my own mind, it was easier for me to walk away from all the anger, to leave it far behind me.

I recently experienced a break up two years ago (4 year relationship) and this year (1 year relationship). I was angry, sad, unmotivated, depressed, and lost. Something that I personally did was watch motivation videos on Youtube! I remember this one video I watched. One of the individuals stated "You would never allow a thief to enter your home and live there rent free, so why do you allow thoughts that steal your joy to enter and live inside your mind? Let it go". I don't mean let it go as in go punch a wall or something. I mean it as literally just let it go. From personal experience, letting go of pent of anger only leads to bitter situation. Here I'll give you an example. One time my ex (Relation that lasted 4 years one) broke up with me for the first time during the 4 years, I was only around 16 years of age. However, when she did break up with me at that time over the phone since it was long distance, I threw my chair and knocked down things in my room in anger (I was very immature). That only lead to a more bitter situation. So the lesson here is to just let that anger go, leave it in the past, don't let it get in the way, if you allow the anger to "invade your mind like a virus it will only affect your life in every other area". The best revenge I have learned is just to move on and do nothing. So.. this is how I let go of pent up anger towards an ex. I really hoped I helped you.

This is going to be a super cliche answer, but put yourself in their shoes. Think about how they feel about you and what you did; do you want them to be mad at you? I was mad at my first ex for a long time, they broke up with me and then fell in love with someone else, but should I be mad because I hurt or happy because they are learning to live? The biggest thing to understand is that we leave people because we want to, or vice versa. Think about the why before the anger boils deep inside.

Well, I learnt that forgiveness is not accepting what happened to you. It is accepting that it has already happened, not that it was okay for it to happen, but it has happened so what are you going to do about it? Once this is understood, you will not hold any grudge for anything or any situation. Because you will learn how to let go of the past, or anger so that it doesn't hold you a prisoner. My advice? Yes, they made you angry, but they also made you stronger, better and showed you exactly what you don't want. Someone once said, the best revenge is never taking revenge but actually letting go, moving on and creating the best version of yourself and forgetting about the past.

One of the best ways to do this would to, if you have anything of his/hers, get rid of it in someway. Either give it back or donate it somewheres. After that or if you only have memories with them, ty to replace them with memories of good stuff. Like with your friends or people you love. It may be hard, but one of the best ways to let go of something like this would be to try to get them out of your life as much as you can. Then it’ll be easer to forget them and go on with letting go of your anger to them.

As a person who had pent up anger towards several people I found it very helpful to write a letter of forgiveness. It may be hard but write a letter of forgiveness on paper or an online document, then burn the paper or delete the document. I personally don't recommend burning anything as it can be very dangerous but if you feel safe enough and that it is the best choice I am unable to stop you. Also meditation and breathing activities on here have been known to help with people who are feeling distressed or simply just need a distraction.

The good thing is you recognize and own you have pent up anger. Next, identify what the anger is about. Try to determine if it is about one thing or multiple things. Once that has been determined, write it down, say it out loud. If you did something to hurt your ex ask for forgiveness. Then, ask for permission to say why you are angry with him/her. After, that you may feel better. The goal is to get to the underlining reason(s) for the anger. Talking with your ex may also allow him/her to reveal any anger on their part. You may find out what you were angry about was caused by lack of communication.