My Silent Voice (Diary)

@WorkingitThrough2 Sending some hugs and love to you ❤️❤️

❤️ Thinking of you. Hope you're doing ok ❤️

@mytwistedsoul

Hi, I am so sorry; I have been caught up in trying to get things straight, and it is very exhausting and time-consuming. Our internet has been unstable for a few months now. On the phone with the phone company 3 hours yesterday and nothing accomplished. I have made some progress with trying to control our finances. However, I think this fix will just be a bandaid to delay the inevitable, Losing our home. I have fixed what I could but it is going to bite us in another 6 months. Struggleing to keep our heads above water.

@WorkingitThrough2 I'd be so incredibly frustrated now with the Internet company if I were you. I'm sorry to hear they haven't been able to fix it for you. I hope they can figure out the problem soon

@mytwistedsoul

Hey Soul,👋👋

I'm sorry I haven't been around. I've been working on resolving issues here at home. I've made some progress, but not enough to make any major differences.

Had a very triggering event happen. The daughter of my raper reached out to my daughter for a friend request. This has set me back so much as feelings are surfacing all over again. After all these years. Can the past not die and leave me alone???????????????????? Her dad is now dead.

Leave us alone and don't keep rehashing this pain and memories.😭

@WorkingitThrough2  Hey you! 😊 Nothing to be sorry for. I took a break myself and have just come back

Omgosh what on earth would make her think it's a good idea to reach out to your daughter like that? It's understandable that it would bring up so many feelings and memories for you. I am so sorry this happened to you - you have so many other things you've been struggling with 😔

@WorkingitThrough2 You've been in my thoughts ❤️ Hope you're doing ok

*Sending love and lots of hugs*

@mytwistedsoul

Hey Soul,

I am sick with a virus, and I am meeting with my husband's doctors to see what my next steps should be. Things are not going well, nor are any of the VA agencies quick to respond, so sitting here on hold.

@WorkingitThrough2 Oh no! I'm sorry to hear you're sick 😞 Has he been getting worse? Trying to get things done while you're sick isn't easy either and it's adding to your stress too I bet. The VA's are slow here too. The neighbor guy has been going to one for some health issues and it takes him months to even get appts

@WorkingitThrough2 You've been in my thoughts ❤️

@mytwistedsoul

Hey, how are you, my friend?  Lots going on here. I fell and hurt my leg and my sciatic nerve I got to go for an MRI next week. Been without my medications for about 2 months but have it now. The drugstore wanted to charge me $3,600.00 for my insulin I told them they lost their minds.

How are things with you?

@WorkingitThrough2 Oh no! I'm so sorry to hear that you fell and got hurt 😞 It sounds pretty serious

@mytwistedsoul

Hi Soul,

I read your diary, and I am so sorry that you are dealing with all your father's issues. You are having the same issh with people you pay to do a job and they half do it and leave you hanging. It sucks. Good help is becoming a thing of the past. Things here have not been resolved either. I have to take a break from all the bull, making procrastinating worse. Hubby sits and plays games on his computer without a care in the world. That pisses me off.

Someone came into my yard Saturday and stole my garbage. What the H? My security cameras did not even catch a glimpse of them. That is scary and crazy all at the same time. What were they looking to find? If they blocked my cameras, then they had to be up to no good. This is something else for me to be watchful of.

@WorkingitThrough2 This whole thing with my father's estate has been a nightmare. Everytime I think it's close to the end his GF brings something else to my attention. And then she has the nerve to comment that this is such a sh*t show. Nobody wants to do their job and nobody wants to admit they screwed up. And yes absolutely - taking a step back makes you less inclined to want to go at it again later because it seems like we're just going in circles 

@mytwistedsoul

I miss you so much; It has been hard to keep an internet connection working. The problem has been going on for months. It is affecting my phone and the internet. I been fussing with them till I am blue in the face

Sorry things are still not settled with your dad

@WorkingitThrough2 I've missed you too. It's always such a nice surprise when you pop up in my notices. ❤️

@mytwistedsoul

Just wanted to tell you I miss you and think of you and all my other close friends. It sucks to not be here. So in my time that I do have I am building a community out of card noard boxes. I made a Clothing store, a playground, Attorney office, General store, A resterant, swiming pool, church, and a few residential homes. I tried to post pictures but they will not accept them. Any way just a way to keep my mind occupied.

I hope everyone is doing well??

@WorkingitThrough2 Omgosh it's so good to see you! I've missed you so much! ❤️ I keep hoping that they'll get your Internet figured out and fixed up for you

@mytwistedsoul

Hello my dear dear friend❤️

well I am back on for now, thank goodness. I had to threaten them with a law suite in order to get thepr attention. My line is still in and out at times but much much better. We got denied for the care giver. They said he had to be homebound. So al back in my plate. I need to take about a week vacation but I don't see anyway of doing it at this time. Just tired of waring with hubby over dumb stuff. He gets so agitated and wants to yell and cuss at me then I want to kknock his head off😒.

My insiders have been pretty silent these days. I don't know what is happening with them. I am not sure if that is good or bad. So So many sleepless nights cause that is the only me time I can get. Going to be like @TinyWhisper11 and supper glue myself somewhere.

Things are taking a toll on me. All my clothes are to big because of the weight loss and I am only 100 pounds. I fear the worst for myself. He will probably out live me and I am allowing him to take me down to. What a waste . I am taking crash courses in handleing all the business affairs and no help.

I pray and ask for guildiance but I hear no replies from the Lord, not sure I am praying hard enough or if God has closed His ears to me. Just keeping it real.

You keep up the good work you are doing here on cups and I hope all your affairs get worked out.

Sorry for dumping this on you.

@WorkingitThrough2

I wish I had the magic cure for all of our troubles. It makes me feel so ill when I hear of the troubles and tragedy that you go through, and I can barely keep my own head above water but you are in my thoughts as well.

@WorkingitThrough2 I'm glad they got it sorted of figured out but gosh what a mess. It's pretty bad when you have to make threats just to have someone do something and even then they don't do it right 

Hey! I just want to tell keep your faith alive it has an end and that sorts because you will surely find peace. I'd been through this yet find my soul and peace. I am sure you will too. Just make sure you are seeking help and taking meds properely it will surely heal.

I used to live like this with untamed thoughts awkward and pathetic life but with the right guidance i have made my way through postivity.

Just keep going and dont loose hope.

Love and Hugs

@decisivePenny257

Thank you