continuing chat w/ Lumie the Legend
@lumieremilkyway
hey lumie the legend! whats up. Im not mareo btw im his fridge here talking to ask the world why im so empty inside bc i rlly wanna know. I've been so empty for months.
Lol im effing around lumie. hey my fam! it'll be awesome to talk to u in a thread thnx again for that awesome idea. first off lets do a lil get to know lumie.answer deez questions
Introvert, extrovert or ambivert?
Favorite season?
Favorite food(s)?
Hobbies?
Whats your favorite 3 qualities about yourself
i avoid fights too like the plague
oh so sumtimes ur bro says rude af stuff to u but ur dad doesn't ever, got it got it
im glad that ur dad is smart enough to be mature with you
that does make sense that ur sad bc of urself in that situation not bc what the person said
bc it can be sad when u let things affect u that u don't want to affect you
im more likely to get mad than sad
im not sad too often the part of my life i experienced true deep sadness was when my ex left me
but anyway anger is just a form of sadness
like when my mom calls me names i get mad but its sadness deep underneath being masked by anger
@MrMarino
yeah my dad is super nice. I am glad it makes sense, I was worried it didn't lol.
so you are more likely to get mad than sad, I kinda thought so. yeah that breakup was kinda rough, right :') I hope you don't feel too sad, marino <3 *hugs* anger is a form of sadness indeed. those names might hurt, but externally you show you are mad so that she doesn't know her words have that much of an impact on you, right? I am not sure if I am but maybe.
im chill w/ how i loook not like i look in themirror and feel bad
idc and i never think about it so don't think that's something i feel sad about bc its not
thanks Lumie you're too kind
for such a smol little human, u have such a huge heart
Lumie how do u even walk with a heart so damn big? i rlly wanna know
@MrMarino
of course marino there is nothing to feel sad or bad about, anyway :) wait, did I say something wrong in the previous reply, I am sorry if I did >_<
no u <3 oh hush marino XD I don't think I have that huge of a heart haha but thank you so much mareomallow, that's the sweetest thing I have heard. tell me how can you carry so much kindness inside you? like what? who even allowed it? *calls the nice cops on you* miss you, I will see you soon, marino *hugs* I hope you are doing well.
Lumie
@MrMarino
marino, where are you??
@lumieremilkyway
lumie hey I walked on to work
sorey fam I didn’t mean to walk out on you
that was scummy of me
@MrMarino
don't have anything to apologize for, mareo oreo <3 and you didn't walk out on me, I understand. you are working now then? I am around to chat, okay? just tell me where and I will be there. and no it wasn't scummy of you, I know you are mad right now and I get it. don't worry about anything else <3
@lumieremilkyway
ur too nice to me Lumie
& id love to chat that would be awesome
ur very understanding I don’t f*cking deserve u
I think disability discussion almost over
@MrMarino
ooh I am just being a friend marino, and not just anyone's friend, yours. you are special <3 :P we can chat anytime, the discussion is going on there for now but I will be waiting as soon as it gets over lol. I don't deserve you, what are you saying :") hehe, see you soon mareomallow <3
I’m in a bad mood bc I’m very sexually frustrated
u do not need to comment on this
This post does not need a reply
just vaguely letting u know is all
It’s an issue I feel all the time but don’t feel comfy talking about especially to ppl like u
@MrMarino
lumie my fam can we talk in an hour it’s usually busy the first hour then slows down
if ur not busy
u don’t have to, don’t feel obligated plz
@MrMarino
we can talk in an hour <3 I don't feel obligated, I look forward to it. :)
@MrMarino
not going to comment, mareomallow. just want to say that I understand <3 and I don't think any different of you. and if you feel comfy after seeing this, you can tell me about it. only if you feel comfy, of course. not going to pressure you. just letting you know, we can talk about it. *hugs*
Have a nice study and class time Lumie. *cheers you on
im one of your biggest fans
see you on my break
@MrMarino
hello mareo oreo, thank you so much <3 class went well and I got some workout done after a while, felt nice. I'm reading your last message right now. I'm really glad you felt comfy telling me about it, I appreciate your trust. also, I just want you to know, this is a safe space, okay? and I'm a safe person to talk to as well. there are going to be absolutely no judgements from my side and I still like you the same as I always have. just thought you should know *hugs* I wish we could talk one-on-one where nobody would be able to read anything we write. but this is good too.
It’s distracting and debilitating
It’s intrusive thoughts and feelings from my brain
It makes things hard to focus
It can keep me awake at night
Makes me feel very uncomfortable
It can make me mad
It can make me feel physically uncomfortable
Puts me in a bad mood
It’s like being starving and getting just a grape
Like being tired af but only getting 20 sec of sleep
This isn’t an issue I face just for one day
This goes on persistently for months with little relief
Some days I don’t feel it tho
But I can’t talk about it
Bc it’s taboo
If I talk about it I am a pervert
If I talk about i am a creep and not to be trusted anymore
If I talk about it I am gross
Atleast in the eyes of others
But I’m not choosing to feel this way
@MrMarino
first of all, marino *hugs*
I get what you are feeling and can understand to the best extent that I can. it definitely isn't fun and it seems to be taking a massive toll on you which is terrible to hear. intrusive thoughts, feelings distracted because of all of this, not being able to focus. all of this is very hard. I get how it is keeping you awake at night and making you feel so uncomfortable. how it is all physically manifesting and just making it worse to handle. all that you are feeling is valid and I hear you, marino. it isn't easy dealing with this from time to time. your description really helped me understand it better, starving and just getting a grape, being super tired but only getting 20 seconds of sleep. it sounds unbearable to experience more than once, and you seem to have been experiencing it for quite a while (months with little relief).
you can definitely talk about it with me. fork thinking it's a taboo, it is very natural and doesn't deserve any stigma. I would love to openly listen to you so I can, myself understand it better since I don't have a whole lot to say about it. I would be honest and say that I don't completely understand it, because I don't want to pretend that I do and say things. but I agree with you on it being a problem and a problem that can be and should be fixed. you are not a pervert if you talk about it, we are humans and we have our needs and it doesn't matter what those needs are, if they aren't satisfactorily being met, we are allowed to feel down and talk about it. you'd never be a pervert in my eyes if you talk about it with me. anything you say about it or related to it, I will listen and there's no way that it will make me uncomfy. this doesn't make me uncomfy and I am willing to listen about your thoughts, that is if you'd like to share. you are not a creep (far far away from it!) and you are still the same marino, this is a part of getting to know each other, right? and I am glad you are being honest here and telling me about this.
this isn't entirely in your control, that part is very true. and to be honest, all of us are going to feel like it at some point in our life, if you have been feeling like this for a while now, maybe it would be nice to talk about it with livi? I don't know if you have already or something, not that I am saying you should, but it could be a good suggestion. I am trying to google some things while I write this (I do it, so pls don't mind it), and I think I am getting a little idea about it. it also says about having stress which may affect it, I am taking a leap here and saying it might be one of the reasons for you. there are a lot of things available on the internet for this but I would like to first confirm with you if you'd be okay continuing to chat me with me like this here? <3 I wouldn't want to say anything here that might stand out to you as me being nosy or anything. if you agree, we can talk about this while I have some internet resources supporting me and maybe we can help you in some way. it's totally normal, marino and you deserve to talk about it and have someone listen to you, I don't mind being that someone for you. <3 let me know, okay?
i read all ur posts but first im gonna answer this question u had
did u say something wrong? my answer to that is
NAHI
\you did not say anything wrong ria. u never once snything wrong to me
sry ifthat sounded rude Ria what i was tryna say is
i was tryna like let u know that its not something i feel sad about on a day 2 day basis
bc u are supportive af and i dint want you to support me on it bc it doesn't bother me
i didn't want u 2 write sum long supportive reply about a thing that doesn't bother me, know wat i mean?
i was trying to clarify and avoid wasting your time
and also i write that way b4 u wrote that so unless i was psychic then i couldn't have seen your other message lol
Ria no. u did not say anything wrong
if i ever say something that seems rude plz tell me
half the time when i "say sumthing rude" is an ignorant accident on my part
i never intentionally try 2 be mean to little Ria and im not always the best at wording things but i hope u get what i mean
@MrMarino
oh yeal lol. you said that it didn't matter you and I already wrote stuff for it in the previoud message, so that's why I said that haha. you are using nahi well, marino. good good ^^ yours wasn't rude! you were just sharing your views on it (my apologetic azz needs to chill a little haha).
okie so I get it now. you don't feel sad about it on a day to day basis, you shouldn't have to either :) and oh okay got it got it. it doesn't bother you. I know what you mean, yeah. thanks for letting me know that I didn't speak anything wrong. *hugs*
I'll tell you when you say something rude. <3 you probably won't tho. I get that it isn't intentional, sometimes it might slip away. what "it" is, idk but I get it, the other it. wow I'm still kinda in a funny mood from yesterday, can't think straight. little Ria \o/ little Ria doesn't mind it at all, Nick! I totally get what you mean.
*waves at Ria
Namate Ria namaste
hello and no is the only words i rememeer from hindi
lumie can u read the little symbols of hindi
the little letter things?
i will be back
@MrMarino
*waves at marino*
namaste marino 🙏 lol
okie wait I'll teach you one more thing, you can try to learn this slowly. "tum bohot acche ho" - you are very good. or you can just use that accha is good, because we do tend to use good a lot haha.
I can read those letters in hindi yes :) they look weird tho, right? XD I haven't studied hindi as a language formally in school for four years now, feels weird.
take your time, I'll see you around! ^^
i am back here 2 reply to ur awesome posts
today in my class the teacher was asking every student to show sum thing i didn't do
so i just exited out and left the zoom lol
cuz i didn't get that done
@MrMarino
lol marino, just like that XD hope you can do it soon <3