Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #9) Passive-Aggressive Communication
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Healthy communication is key!
Questions:
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
Activity: Please reply to 3 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!
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@Heather225
1. The silent treatment
2. Subtle insults
3. Procrastination on Purpose
4. Sabotage
5. Keeping Score (People who keep track of favors)
Q. What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
A. Silent Treatment and Keeping Score
Q. Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
A. Passive aggression hinders the ability to communicate in a healthy way and sort the misunderstandings out. It remains at the back of our head giving rise to traumas.
@lyricalSea85
OMG! I wrote basically the same thing about a healthy line of communication! But you added the part about misunderstandings and that's so true! Passive aggressiveness would definitely lead others to interpret the situation in different ways
@lyricalSea85
nice!!!
@lyricalSea85
i like what you said a lot, "rise to trauma" it is very true, it makes people feel unstable and not worthy, like we aren't anything good enough.
@Heather225
Questions:
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
- Silent Treatment
- Subtle Insult
- Procrastinating on Purpose
- Sabotage
- Keeping Score
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
I have gotten the silent treatment from my friend before. She ignored my texts asking to resolve the conflict and instead left me on read and did not reply until days later.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
It is harmful because instead of addressing the problem, it creates more negativity and hostility toward one another. It severs a healthy line of communication and instead fosters more conflict. It keeps leaders and members in the community from resolving conflict and making peace and harmony with one another and it makes others feel badly about being on the site or about themselves.
@mikacv
absolutely right
@mikacv
At times such silent treatment helps us understands friends better I guess.
@Heather225
1.
1. The Silent Treatment
2. Subtle Insults
3. Procastinating on Purpose
4. Sabotage
5. Keeping Score
2. *Trigger Warning*
I have personally experienced all these 5 forms of passive-aggression from my parents (they can be little toxic). But it was always the subtle insults that affected me a lot. I used to be a little heavy when I was a teenager and my mum wanted me to slim down. I was battling depression, self-harm and suicidal thoughts so it was very difficult for me to look after myself and exercise. My mum, being angry at me would often find ways to insult me on how I look and comment on how I should slim down even after expressing her and having a talk on how those insults affect me. It stung when I thought I resolved the issue by talking to her but then she always found ways to insult my looks. But I am happy to know that those days are just history now.
3. Passive-aggression is just toxic. With a community like 7 cups, we need to spread kindness, compassion, support and a overall judge-free, loving environment and not a toxic one where one tries to bring down the other. This just pushes the community back rather than making ot better.
@Heather225
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
People are being passive aggressive when they are using indirect communication.
Signs: The silent treatment (stopped speaking to you or stop replying), subtle insults (you can't be sure whether this has happened), procrastating on purpose (when someone says they will do something but end up not doing it), Sabotage (where they mess something up for someone else), and keeping score (these are people who keep track of all the favours they do for you).
What is one example of passive-aggressive behaviour you have experienced in your life?
I have experienced someone who would keep track of all the favours they do for me.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
It can be damaging to out community because it can harm those around us.
1. The silent treatment
2. Subtle insults
3. Procrastinating on Purpose
4. Sabotage
I don't mean to procrastinate on purpose but it happens subconsciously. Especially when I am on my phone I keep my assignments for later which results in fast burn out when I have to do it all together.
It's damaging because at other viewpoint it's toxic. It gets really fast and scary for everyone around
@DarkPiT23
Hello there!
I totally understand The procrastinating-afterall, i am in The same position and i unconsciously procrastinate a lot too. And that is sometimes okay. We are all humans, in The end.
thank you for your amazing message!
Sending strenght and energy!
Lots of love,
🌸Hana🌸
- What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
= Silent treatment, subtle insults, procrastinating on purpose, sabotage and keeping score.
- What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
= Procrastinating on purpose and keeping score.
- Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
=Because it confuses us and is used as a method of taking control or punishment.
@Listeningstars
I think you're exactly right that passive aggression only provides confusion because it isn't straight to the point and upfront.
@Listeningstars good examples to share and confusion is one of key things to be considered.
@Heather225
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
Five signs of passive-aggressive communication is the silent treatment, subtle insults, procrastinating on purpose, sabotage, and keeping score.
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
One example of passive aggressive behavior I have experienced in my life is the silent treatment, and keeping score. An example is after getting into a disagreement with a friend, it became very obvious my friend had been keeping score on who hurt who the most. It was really unhealthy behavior.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
Passive aggression is so damaging to our community because in a way, it's not being truthful and upfront with the other person which causes a lot of ambiguity.
@Gnibellen That's right! Being upfront is a better choice!
@Gnibellen it is cool to see that you saw your passive agressive communications and they can be work to be better.
@Gnibellen Totally with you! It really causes a lot of ambiguity!!!.
@Heather225
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
Silent Treatment
Insulting subtly
Procrastinating on purpose
Sabotage
Keeping score
I sometimes do the silent treatment. I avoid messages and people. I don’t mean to do that on purpose but I don’t know how to convey my feelings. I can't clearly express how hurt I am so that I go silent thinking that they would get it. But after watching this video I became clear that I should speak up instead of closing myself. I'll try to improve on that.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
People are here to seek support and encouragement. In order to provide a friendly environment we must not be passive-aggressive towards anyone. It will affect their trust on 7 cups and they may end up hurt. It creates more dissatisfaction. Thus, we should focus on good communication instead of passive aggression.
@hopezzy it is nice to see that you are honest about your flaw and your share reason of why passive aggresion is on point.
@hopezzy
Hello there!
I totally love How you mentioned good communication, afterall almost every relationship should be based in functional communication!
Sending strenght and energy!
Lots of love,
🌸Hana🌸
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
1. The silent treatment
2. Subtle Insults
3. Procrastinating on purpose
4. Sabotage
5. Keeping score
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
I have experienced Procrastinating on purpose from one of my friend. He does it when we the plan is not what he likes. He say yes to plans at first but when time comes he tries to alter it.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
Any passive aggression makes people not connecting on the same level and post pone any problem without solving it.
@dudewithaplan 100% with you. This behavior absolutely postpone the conflict and harms both parties.
@dudewithaplan i agree ! it's important to try and resolve conflict as soon as we can. when we postpone it, it does tend to make things worse :(
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication? Backhanded compliments, refusal to state feelings, avoiding responsibilities, They say they agree, but your actions say otherwise, Stonewalling or freezing someone out, controlling.
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life? Aggression, denial, distortion, cruelty, and silence.
indirect ways. a series of verbal, non-verbal, and evasive techniques that indicate discontent without ever saying it.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community? “These are people who will often do anything to get what they need, including lie,” They sabotage anything and cause discord among peers.
@MinisterMichelle Yeah agree! Passive-aggressive communication is very negative!!!
@00Michelle00
I can relate with your experience. Thanks for sharing.