Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #6) How to Accept Feedback
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Accepting feedback is a crucial part of being a good leader.
Think about the most recent feedback you received: How did you react? How did you feel? Why do you think you reacted and feel that way? What would you do differently after having watched the video?
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@Heather225
Think about the most recent feedback you received: How did you react? How did you feel? Why do you think you reacted and feel that way? What would you do differently after having watched the video?
The last time I got feedback, I reacted by accepting it. I felt a little insecure and like I messed up horribly. I reacted the way I did because I am used to getting feedback and am open to it, I felt the way I did because hearing how one does something wrong will always eat at someones confidence, at least a little. What I would do differently is learn to not feel any bad feelings and tell myself that the person giving me feedback wants the best for me and is trying to "coach me up".
@CognitiveACE
Your positive attitude toward receiving feedback is really good. I have really learnt a lot from reading your answer. Thank You, ACE! I wish you the best in your journey ahead!
@Heather225
Think about the most recent feedback you received:
I have recently started learning driving. In the initial days, I was making a lot of mistakes. So, I received strong feedback (which was sort of a scolding) from my driving teacher.
How did you react?
It was hurtful at first but I maintained my calm. I tried to remain very careful later while driving. And now, I have become relatively better in driving the car in the first and second gear. The feedback has helped me improved significantly!
How did you feel?
Honestly, I was hurt.
Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?
I think the reason I felt hurtful was I didn't like being scolded. Somewhere I felt that my ego was hurt.
What would you do differently after having watched the video?
I would try to cheer myself up and would think that receiving feedback is a way to improve and grow. Now, upon receiving the feedback in my life, I would try to follow the specific steps suggested in the video. I would try to remain calm and would listen to the feedback and would also appreciate the person who would give me feedback.
@shiningSound31
HI Shining - Some driving teachers are really bad teachers. It is very important to teach a skill like driving without upsetting and hurting the feelings of the student, because that can make them nervous, and nervous people make mistakes. The only reason a driving teacher should scold you is if you deliberately do not listen to them. A good driving teacher has a special car with two steering wheels and an extra set of brakes as well, and then they can over-ride any dangerous mistakes that you might make. Driving teachers who don't bother to teach with the right equipment like this can become nervous themselves and lose their patience with students, which is dangerous to you, the student. If a teacher who is being paid to teach you doesn't make it comfortable for you to learn, then you should fire them and pay a different teacher instead - it is dangerous for you to have someone scolding you when you learn to drive. It is always important to give feedback clearly and without trying to make someone upset.
@CintaBali
??????
The most recent feedback I can remember is when I was talking to my cousin about my resume and she started giving me suggestions to make it better and some part of me felt very defensive and protective over the work I had done. I do not like criticism. When I feel as if I am being criticised I start defending my work or my actions by explaining why I do things the way that I do. After watching the video I would like to be a little more graceful in the way I receive feedback and become better at realizing the person isnt telling me that Im doing something wrong, but moreso understand that they are just giving me feedback because they care enough to want to see me succeed.
@Heather225
Think about the most recent feedback you received:
How did you react?
I was surprised but I took it mostly positively, I might have internally questioned where exactly I went wrong and if it was a valid argument yet I was fine with it.
How did you feel?
I was upset for awhile and then decided it was for the best and it was a learning step for me and criticism is always good means the person knows I have potential to do better.
Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?
Well, it was not really my work that I got feedback for rather for failing to correct someone else is work which is unfair because it was not really my responsibility but I took it in stride. Might have been a wee bit upset but I understood it was for my good.
What would you do differently after having watched the video?
Spoken up and explained myself better. Also, understood the other persons point of view and learnt more from what they said.
@Heather225
How did you react?
I accepted my fault and decided to make sure the person providing feedback is able to see improvement soon.
How did you feel?
I felt guilty and bad for letting someone down. I also realised that I could not be giving any excuses.
Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?
I think this could be related to my personality type ENFJ-A which shows that I dread letting anybody down.
What would you do differently after having watched the video?
I would try and ask for advice to do better.
(I received feedback regarding my response time and recently I received a review that said that I responded quickly so yay! 😄)
Thank you and looking forward to the next discussion! ~\(≧▽≦)/~
@Heather225
Think about the most recent feedback you received: How did you react? How did you feel? Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?
Colleagues of mine encouraged me to embrace my work and to really put out my best every time. And it made me feel as they were constantly looking out for me and I really appreciated the fact that they went out their way to encourage me.
What would you do differently after having watched the video?
Nothing differently, great insights though!
A lot better than I normal since the chat room mentor did in Gentle way. I feel good about how. I reacted. I think reacted the way I did because the chatroom mentor did in a gentle way and not In. A way that would make me freack out. I think ask how can I know when is the tight time. To say I need. Help with a chat when something out of place happens in lsr.
@Heather225
How did you react? How did you feel? Why do you think you reacted and feel that way?
Part of my personality is that I love feedback, and looking for places where I can improve is always something I enjoy doing. That being said, the last time I received constructive feedback, I actually smiled a lot because the way the person worded their feedback for me was super helpful, and the first time when I saw the feedback, I could word-for-word agree 100% to what they said. As for the reason I reacted this way, I think it is really the way I perceive my own faults. If I were completely honest, I would rather someone tell me all my faults directly than compliment me and only point out one of them. Would I take a feedback with negative connotations badly? I rather think that I won't; to think of it in a positive nature, and know that this is where I can improve is definitely a plus! It really comes with the fact that I love people that are super straightfoward :)
What would you do differently after having watched the video?
Ooh, I loved the video's approach to the whole idea of feedback, and I can agree with all its points. Something I would do differently . . . I am not quite sure, but I really liked the way the video explain feedback and how to approach (the reasons behind it and everything)!
@DayDreamWithYou
Liked your answer :)
@Heather225
How did you react? – My last feedback was from my manager at work. I reacted by defending myself.
How did you feel? – I feel betrayed and shocked as it came out of nowhere and I did not see it coming.
Why do you think you reacted and feel that way? - I think It was after one month of working at the company when they told me that I am slow at work and that I am not trying enough. It felt really bad because I was doing all my best and I did not know during the whole time that there was a problem with my performance.
What would you do differently after having watched the video? - Looking back at the situation, I am glad that I told the manager how I felt because I have no problem receiving feedback because it is an opportunity to learn and grow. However, the feedback I was given came pretty late and was not constructive. When I asked how can I improve I did not get any answer and the manager kept on scolding me without giving me any tip about what can I do to get better. However, one thing I would change would be to ask for feedback immediately myself to know how I am doing.
The most recent feedback I got was positive and in fact boosted my confidence so I can continue to do a good job. I reacted by smiling and appreciating it
I felt more confident after it was given to me.
I reacted this way because I was given reassurance on a topic I was unsure about and it made me think I was doing the right thing.
I would still appreciate the feedback and ask for ways in which I can continue to improve