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Course 3, Discussion 3: When you don't get the role you want

FrenchToast December 5th, 2022

Hello, students! Let's talk leadership!

Many of you have or will apply for certain roles that interest you! And some times we get it and some times we don't! It can be difficult to find out that we didn't get the role, but we can control how we react to it.

Here are some DOs and DON'Ts:

- DO talk to the leader of the role that you applied for and get some input on what you can/need to do in order to get the role next time! Be aware though most leaders of these roles are busy so give it some time!

- DON'T bring the issue into the support rooms. If you are upset, talking to a peer supporter about how you are feeling is ok!

- DO take some self-care, self-care is good for any occasion but its best to deal with those feelings of failure or disappointment outside of 7 cups, things like going on your member account can be so helpful to overcome some of these feelings

- DON'T think that you are obligated to stay on 7 cups right after finding out bad news, especially if you are in LSR/TL and you see other listeners who have gotten the role that you wanted! It can be hard to deal with and it can cause unneeded jealousy or hurt on your part! Not everyone is like this but if you think that this is a possibility that you can think this way staying away might be a great option!

- DON'T take it personally, everyone is ready at different times. It can be hard for us to realize this but just because someone got the role and they might have been here in less or the same amount of time doesn't mean that you personally are ready! Everyone grows and accomplishes things at different times!

- DO get a mentor, in general its a good idea to get a mentor but for things like your goals on 7 cups mentors can be great and helpful! They can give you feedback, do mock chats with you, and overall help you with your goals as I said before!

- DON'T think you have to apply for every role and every team out there! There is time you don't have to apply for everything! Its super easy to burnout that way, and that can lead to more "rejection" and hurt that none of us want!

*Never let not getting a role the first time discourage you! You will be told when you can apply again and use the feedback that you get to better yourself when you can/decide that you are ready to! practice makes perfect none for us are perfect and no one will ever be! Its a good thing to remember no matter your role as a listener your help is greatly appreciated and you are still helping so many people!*

✒️Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

✒️ Please reply to at least 1 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!

After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next post here!


🔉This post is brought to you by the Leadership Development Program, find information on it here tinyurl.com/AcademyLDP

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WishUponAStar968 February 21st

@FrenchToast

✒️Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

In my current job I am the one that is a leader and has to tell others they did not get the leadership role available due to other needs met or other candidates that fit better.  So if I were to not get the role I wanted, I would be very understanding and now that at this time the role wasn't for me, and that I can always try again later and keep trying until one day I get it.  I would not be upset, as I understand there is a reason for everything and perhaps at this moment its not my time yet.  I would thank the leader that responded to me, definitely ask for constructive feedback and when ready (self care) and try again!

1 reply
4Jasmine March 4th

@WishUponAStar968

I appreciate your answer.👍

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ChromaticFinss February 29th

Hi _______

Thanks for letting me know the update. Even though it is a little bit disappointing news, I acknowledge the scenerio. I will certainly try to improve and apply again at the next best time.  I would appreciate if you have any feedbacks for me which you think might be helpful for my further attempts. Thanks again for your time .

@FrenchToast
✒️Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

Hi! I had a great time applying for the role, and it did open my eyes to great areas of improvements and highlighted my strengths. If you have any feedback, I will be more than happy to hear it. Thanks!

1 reply
sky2Ocean20 March 11th

@wonderousLove3994

that's a very warm response. I will definitely include this one on my note for reference. 💛

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4Jasmine March 4th

@FrenchToast

If I find out that I was not given a role, I might eventually try again at some point, but all the work and effort I put in was quite a lot. I would say to the leader who informed me, that I am disappointed, but obviously it must not have been the right time for me. 

Then I would return to 7 Cups as a attending member instead. 

1 reply
4Jasmine March 4th

@4Jasmine

Type-o 

I would return as an attending member. 

1 reply
JustSophia March 11th

@4Jasmine

Sounds like you have understanding of yourself and your own needs in terms of self-care.  

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March 8th

@FrenchToast

Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

Thankyou for letting me know, while I'm a bit disappointed but that's ok also Can you give me some feedback to improve myself so I can work on it to get the role the next time?

JustSophia March 11th

With grace.  Not get upset or bitter, or if I did, to take that negative feeling elsewhere and provide myself with self-care until I was in a more healthy frame of mind.  I could ask for constructive feedback and offer words of understanding.  I would also try to offer myself patience and understanding.

JustSophia March 11th

Whoops.  I only answered the first question.  

What would I say to the person telling me I didn't get the role?

Thanks for letting me know.  If you have any feedback for me, I'd really appreciate hearing it.  I'd like to understand what I could do better and learn from it.  Thanks!

4 replies
TheOnlyChresser March 11th

@JustSophia As always good writing :D!

3 replies
TheOnlyChresser March 11th

Its good this time because its compact also everyone can forget :)

2 replies
JustSophia March 12th

@TheOnlyChresser

Thank you so much Chresser!  I so appreciate your support.  

Being "compact" is not always my strong suit, though, as you may have noticed (lol).  That's something I continue to work on.  Keep me on my toes.  :D 

1 reply
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sky2Ocean20 March 11th

@FrenchToast

✒️Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

-> Hi (leader-username). Thank you for informing. Although I was eagerly waiting to be in this role, I completely respect the decision. Let me know how can I improve and become ready for the next time. I appreciate your time and effort in making this community a better place. 

1 reply
daydreammemories March 18th

@sky2Ocean20

Nicely put 👏😊

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TheOnlyChresser March 11th

@FrenchToast

✒️Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

Thank you for taking your time to provide me some feedback while im disappointed to not be selected i understand theres some areas i can improve if possible i would love to discuss the feedback you have for me so i can work on those areas and be better off in the future :D Thanks again for your time!

1 reply
JustSophia March 12th

@TheOnlyChresser

Hey Chresser - I'm watching and appreciating your responses, too.

It seems like you could almost just cut and paste this one if you wanted to at some point.  I hope you get the roles that fit, though, and that you never need to. 

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PetiteSouris March 16th

@FrenchToast @yourbuddy30

Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you? 

Good Day Mr/Miss/Mrs Doe, 

         It was a pleasure learning about the X role, and interviewing for the position. I was looking forward to working with the team, however I was not choosen for this role. Though I am disappointed, I would like to know if given the opportunity to reapply, how can I strengthen my soft and hard skills. Again, thank you for the opportunity and I looking forward to reapplying in the future.

Warmest Regards,

Souris 

✒️ Please reply to at least 1 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words! Well written response @theonlychresser. If I were the leader I would definitely give you the feedback for you to improve yourself.

❤︎✨♡✨❤︎

1 reply
Renjik8013 April 13th

@PetiteSouris

I appreciate how you responded professionally!

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