in the wonders of my mind💗.

"K.YS" _{"I will"}

_{on the bathroom wall. and no it wasn’t me that said I would.}

_{dads on his way.}

@iloveyouxx

quietly checking on you and sending optional hugs 🩷 

(feel free to absolutely ignore it lol <3)

🩷_thankyou<3

_{my fingers not ffingering rn. sorry. <3}

@iloveyouxx 

it’s okay, don’t worry 🩷 here if you need anything <3

_{my mind.}

_{here we go again.} 

_{you’re always here for me but you’re literally the one making living to me so *** hard??}

_{my ex best friend asked if I was okay.}

_{which- obviously not-? and it was because of her. but it doesn’t matter.}

_{I really can’t live through this anymore.} 

_{waking up is the worst part of my day.}

_{and well that happens everyday.} 

_{ofc I gotta cry again.}

_{who gave these *** male teachers permission to go into the girls bathroom. secondary students weren’t allowed at the time cos our lunch goes on when primary students have lessons but can I just break down for a moment before I have to go back there?}

_{TW caps. it’s not that interesting. don’t bother <3}

 _{this girl in my english class was talking to me about her perfect boyfriend. I don’t describe him as perfect cos I’m jealous- I couldn’t care less- but she kept going on about him that way. how they kissed on Sunday and he was so cute and all that. then she said she was breaking up with him if he didn’t get back from his vacation in 2weeks? since according to her she deserves so much better than being in a distance relationship. I just asked if she ever actually loved him and she’s like "ahhahuajjsjaajajajjajahahahaha LOVE??? mmmm I meannnnn" I said about all she cares about is looks and that’s all that matters to her- in a joking way- I was laughing the whole time cos I’m not that..whatever I’d come off as. but I’ve never felt like faking a personality. I never laugh when something’s not funny I just laugh. but she was like "yeahhhh cos it is all that matters duhh"}

_{she asked if I have a boyfriend and I said no I wasn’t as gorgeous as her and that she could get literally any guy- I said it cos this girls obsessed with herself. like on *another* level of obsessed. she goes crazy at compliments and I did a bunch of times about her handwriting, her hair weight makeup beauty and all.} 

_{then she asked if I had a crush☠️ I just went "bruh omigoshhhh"- still in a joking way and she said that meant I did. I told her I didn’t but I give up on convincing anyone so oh well.} 

_{she started guessing the most random guys and swore that I liked them like it doesn’t work like that?}

_{I told her I didn’t like guys and she went "😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱OMIGOD YOURE GAY???" ……………….……….…}

_{she said she could hook me up with my crush? cos she knows I’m not gay she was just trying to get me to say smth :P}

_….

_{its such a random interaction. we talked that whole class.} 

_{this girl- I think I gave her a nickname? but I’m gonna call her L. she comes up a lot.}

.

_{the errors back.}

my dads up.

_{f r e a k.}

:>

_{I don’t get the point of being fake nice-?}

_{there’s this kid in 8C switching to our lead.}

_{I call him a kid cos he’s immature. teachers keep telling us we’re "young adults" and we gotta act like it but honestly I’m a kid too?? young adults is just teenagers and teenagers here are dumber than any other age.}

_{calling that kid Z. he’s gonna come up-..*alot*}

_{ofcourse he’s a guy which do we really need more guys in our class??}

I can’t tell what’s worse more guys or girls. 

_{nvm girls are definitely worse.}

_{he’s been on 6 reports before.} 

_{not like "reports"- they’re the *serious* reports that are all fancy strong type of paper with the school name and if the kid does smth wrong teacher signs it and if you get on 3 reports you’re literally expelled.} 

_{this girl in my science class was in his lead. she tried to explain why he hasn’t gotten expelled but I don’t really get it.}

_…….

_{can you just. stop. please.}

_{I was being nice :’) and im trying.}

_{i know they’re gonna read this.} 

_{I don’t know what happened. but right now I can’t put up with it.} 

_{just quit it. please.🩷I’ve never been harsh on anyone here :’) but I can’t. and this is so *** on purpose and it’s clear but no one’s getting anything out of this but hurt. please. if you’re not in the right age to be on cups then I’d deactivate my account. because this is literally such a- simple. thing to make something big of. It’s immature for a 14yo no? stop it.💜} 

_sorry.

_{dads coming.}

I’m really tired.

_{I’m sick of the fake nice people do you have nothing better to do-? plus it’d get exhausting but typing some kind words is probably easy. fake personalities just hurt me. just be yourself even if yourself sucks suck to everyone else and maybe don’t make my life unbearable while being picture perfect to the world.}

_{I hate how it gets to people.}

_{having all that power over others. it completely changes others and they’re never the same person you thought you knew.}

dad left again.

_{at 11pm. not as bad honestly.}

_{I just wish someone would. talk to me.} 

_{that kid that’s switching to our lead. his name is- *really* similar to shadow’s real name. not the same but a letter off.}