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in the wonders of my mindšŸ’—.

iloveyouxx March 17th

hey there :D hm. last time I checked you didnā€™t look like mešŸ§makes sense doesnā€™t itšŸ˜›since there can only be one *me*āœØone of a kind now arent IšŸ˜/sar. one out of 8118835999āœØšŸŒ·can you imagine :0 o right- you can- becoss youā€™re also one of a kindšŸ’– sorrysorry haha :PšŸ¤im just messing around xDšŸ’žalso itā€™s 2am- but shush no snitchingšŸ¤«Iā€™ll sleep in a whilešŸ˜when Iā€™m feeling a bit more sane :>šŸ˜›šŸ©·

wanted to have my own space.šŸ’œ for thoughts feelings vents or just anything on my mind.šŸ’™

to whoever'sĀ coming acrossĀ :'3šŸ’œplease dont lurk here.šŸ©· I know anyone can have access to this forumĀ :')šŸ’™but please be respectfulšŸ©·.(but honestly..I know someone will either way :PšŸ’› yā€™all get crazy nosy haha- itā€™s alright.šŸ’›nothing too interesting will be here anywayšŸ’›if you would like to come in and be supportive itā€™s completely okiešŸ’›but please donā€™t make it a regular or "normal" thing if that makes sense. just have a sort of limitšŸ’›because Iā€™d still like this to be just my space ^-^šŸ’›)

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iloveyouxx OP June 29th

It's 4am again. we're traveling again in 9 days

iloveyouxx OP June 29th

TW I know I never go these in but idk what to say :')Ā 

I sleepwalk really often. and I've moved chairs around and set the microwave on and I've vomited in my sleep before I don't know if that's normal. but I was 9 when that happened.Ā 

and last night- or morning I think I slept at... 7/8. I woke up on a different bed and all my clothes had orange stains on them. vibrant 'sharp'. and my dad found orange stains on the carpets. and I only actually thought about the stains on my clothes then and I tried getting them off before he noticed and got so much more angry. and he didn't somehow he just kept yelling and cursing but that's it.Ā 

and since then I keep trying to figure out what happened. because I don't have anything that shade of orange or just orange at all. I went through everything mine or not accessible or not. there's that square thing you put your cups on. I just googled it they're called coasters-. and there's dish soap. and then I realized that's fully yellow and no where near what I was looking for. and I saw a bottle and it was orange wrong shade but orange. and the actual thing inside tho was fully clear.

i don't know where my dad got it from but he started yelling at me and saying that I was eating mangos like seriously it's just so stupid atp. we don't even have mangos. I'm not just gonna pull them outta my pocket like it's nothing and walk around the house eating them. if he was gonna make a dumb accusation he could've said I was drinking or something but where am I gonna get mangos from. ofc where am I gonna get drugs from too but it'd make more sense if he accused me of that instead. he thought I was capping last year

2 replies
iloveyouxx OP June 29th
fill* fill these in*Ā 
iloveyouxx OP June 29th

vaping last year*

It's the swipe keyboard-

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iloveyouxx OP June 29th

I'm gonna sleep I've been trying so hard but to and idk why. I'm kinda scared but the quest that can hashish is... something I won't think about

1 reply
iloveyouxx OP June 29th

worst that can happen * omg-

I had a picture of a good night cat but idk where that went

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iloveyouxx OP June 29th

somethings happening to the phone I think :') but nvm found itšŸ©·

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iloveyouxx OP June 29th

Iā€™m so tired

iloveyouxx OP June 29th

and itā€™s just so much and I canā€™t even talk about it I couldnā€™tĀ 

iloveyouxx OP June 29th

I really donā€™t expect a lot but why canā€™t someone just be a proper *** friend and not make me feel like im reliving smth I donā€™t wanna think about.Ā 

someone isnā€™t targeted at like everyone just one person but idk what to say

iloveyouxx OP June 29th

:ā€™) why do they keep switching accs I swear Iā€™m not that stupid

iloveyouxx OP June 29th

1:30 am which isnā€™t that bad. honestly itā€™s not bad at all but Iā€™m mentioning that because dads still not back :ā€™) he went out with his friend. "with his friend"

iloveyouxx OP June 29th

my face swelled up. or most of my face.

4 replies
slowdecline48 June 30th

@iloveyouxx

šŸ˜³

Your face?... That doesn't sound good. What's going on?!

3 replies
iloveyouxx OP July 1st

@slowdecline48

oh lol XD my eyes swell up really often and my aunt says itā€™s an allergy but I donā€™t think so. and my face was red and puffy that day because thereā€™s this thing that youā€™re not meant to put on your skin :ā€™) so I put it on my skin. not to give any ideas tho. tw itā€™s just satisfying to hurt myself I thinkĀ ļ»æ

2 replies
slowdecline48 July 1st

@iloveyouxx Hurting oneself is not helpful. Not to anyone, really.

Even so, I'm slightly relieved...at first I thought your dad or brother was practicing domestic backhand on the regular.

1 reply
iloveyouxx OP July 1st

@slowdecline48

no I know :ā€™) it doesnā€™t do anythingĀ 

oh no my dad wasnā€™t there that day and he still does as long as Iā€™m still breathing. my brother does too but Iā€™m not scared of him- thanks for being here slowšŸ¤

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