@amiableBunny4016 space
Hi everyone,
Im gonna be posting here every week. So.. you may or may not have seen my poems across 7cups or my writing. Anyways, if you have not then thats okay.
Let me introduce myself. You can call me Bunny/Violet/Bun Bun. I am from the UK and I am 13 years old. So I came here to inspire, to love, to show kindness and to be respected. The biggest power on this planet is love and kindness. Humanity is in a state of disaster. Panic. Hatred. But hate never beats love. Because love has more power than hate.
I was bullied for over 6 years. I learnt alot across the years. I learnt to overcome. Learnt to love. Learnt to forgive. I am human. I am not a robot. I am not a stranger anymore. I am me. And if people wanna judge me for who I am then I say.... I forgive them. And I know that they can change.
Like Martin Luther King once said, “Returning hate for hate multiplies hate, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars. Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that.”
Humanity is changing. The world is awakening. And more and more people are realising the reality. The reality of social media. The reality of trauma. The reality of life. This is who we are. And together we form as 1.
We live in a big world. Scary. Isn't it? But its to beautiful. Its so beautiful how the sun rises. How then stars glimmer every night. How the wind howls. Isn't it? and we dont realise how beautiful it really is until..... we think about it. Think deeply about it and you will find how beautiful it is.
If your feeling alone right now. just know that.....
Your strong. Even if you dont believe it.
Your worthy. Even if you dont believe it.
You can get through this.
I am here for you.
We are here for you.
Thanks for reading, This is me, Bunny and this is my world.
Take care,
Bunny
someone actually said they want me to loose my mind in a chatroom . what the ***. why is all the bad things happening to me . even on my member account
@amiableBunny4016 It both amazes and disappoints me at the nonsense they let go in your chatrooms. The fact that they felt comfortable enough to say something like that to you directly says more about them than it does about you. Some people just aren't happy unless they're bullying or picking on someone else. Other people's pain makes them feel better about themselves and it's such a lousy way to live
@mytwistedsoul
no point. i already get enough abuse on my L, if i change my username whats going to get any better? i had never spoken to that person before so they were probably in a bad mood. and at this point, i can get used to it, just like i did back at home. oh well...honestly, i feel at peace now a days. even tho its stressful and exhausting, i'm at peace with myself. no more running around, no more playing hide and seek and hiding from people, no more screaming. im okay....
@amiableBunny4016 I know some people that have taken breaks and changed their name during the break. I suppose when they come back it's almost like a fresh start I guess? I'm not sure really.
Is anyone here? 🥺
@amiableBunny4016 What's on your mind 💙
@mytwistedsoul
i dont know. just keep thinking about mom and trying to distract myself... 💙
@amiableBunny4016 Are you trying to figure out something with her? I mean I can understand why she would be invading your thoughts. So much of what's happened the past few months is because of her 😕
@mytwistedsoul
no, i dont want to figure out anything with her. i dont know... i have lingering thoughts about her or dreams about her. in my dreams she is crying and sobbing in a corner of a room and keeps asking for me. i dont know whats up with me recently.... i have these weird lingering feelings and stuff...
@amiableBunny4016 Maybe it's in your subconscious? Like you want her to want you the way that you've wanted her for so long. I mean - They can be horrible abusive people but there's always some part of us that wants to be loved by them. To know that we matter to them. Idk 💙
@mytwistedsoul
yeah, probably that. you literally understand me better than i do at this point lol. 💙 *sends hugs if okay*
@amiableBunny4016 *accepts hugs and sends more* 💙 Now if only I could do the same for myself lol 😅
@mytwistedsoul
i wish you would realise how special you are 💙 i know understanding ourselves is a bit of a puzzle.
@amiableBunny4016 I never know what to say to that 💙 thank you
It is a puzzle that's for sure
i guess..... thats it. right? thats the end of everything. i was born. i got hurt. i ended up in hospital. i am no longer in existence.
I need to hug someone.
But it's too weird to ask someone in this hospital.
@amiableBunny4016
nothing but emptiness.
@amiableBunny4016 It's something that can be a blessing at times and a curse other times 😕
@mytwistedsoul
i hate it. i hate it so much. i just want it to go away. i hate this blankness. it makes me feel like im not alive.
@amiableBunny4016 After awhile it does me too 😞 I mean it's helpful at first when I feel too many overwhelming things and emotions are just too big but after awhile it just sucks
@mytwistedsoul
my brain cant make words. all i do these days is just come on here or i just sleep.
and even when i come on here, i just get more depressed. so.... i got nothing to think about.
there aint no more beating, no more screaming, no more *** and people, im not used to it. there is no more problems to solve. no more nothing. it doesnt feel right.
@amiableBunny4016 You've been in survival mode for so long 😞 It's hard to relax when there's nothing to fear. You're right it doesn't feel right or normal to you. Because in reality it's not what you're used to as normal. It would help if there was something for you could be involved in. Real people that you could interact with
@mytwistedsoul
sorry.. i dont know whats wrong with me. i was tired and fell asleep for a while. woke up to the sounds of a child crying.
eh, yeah. it would be nice to have someone real to talk to, but in the meantime i have the the wonderful @mytwistedsoul and so many other lovely people on 7cups (ding ding... @LoveMyMoonflowers) to be there for me hehe 💙
Bunny :)
@amiableBunny4016
it's not wrong to sleep when your tired lovely friend 💜 you don’t have to be sorry for anything. i’m glad you got a bit of rest. (i hope that child is doing okie ☹️😔)
your so sweet for tagging me here 😭💜 tbh i consider talking to you and Soul talking to real people lol but that’s just my opinion 🤪
thank you both for being there for me too 💜 and for just… being there in my life.
@LoveMyMoonflowers
@amiableBunny4016 @mytwistedsoul
@LoveMyMoonflowers @amiableBunny4016 Lots and lots of love to you both! 💙💙
@amiableBunny4016 Aww no worries ok? Meds can make you tired and hey your body needs the rest. This way too you can work towards feeling better 💙
dear mom,
was beating me the only threat you had? was it? because mom, the way you hit me, the way you used to beat the *** out of me, it hurt. it hurt for a while. but eventually it doesnt hurt anymore mom. i became numb to that sort of pain, so using that threat was useless. one day... we are all gonna d1e mom... what are you gonna d1e for? for beating your kid? what do you live for mom? what do you live for? what was your life other than trauma and more trauma and then giving it to others? was it that hard to love me? what was lacking in my love all those years? but you know.. asking these questions are useless. because like you said "children shouldnt ask questions from their mother" because apperantly im not old enough to question my parents. you said, that you wanted the best for me and you promised that you would love me, but all you ever did was walk past me and hurt me more. this wasnt love mom. this wasnt love. why dont you understand?
but i know i mean nothing to you, so I wont question you from now on, and I wont bother you, and I wont look for you, and I wont come back to you. and that little boy of yours, is dying in your hands. Let him live for gods sake. From now on, you will have no complaints from me, you wont hear my voice, and you wont see me again. so give in already.
sicenerely,
your daughter.
@amiableBunny4016 It breaks my heart to know she hurt you like this. That she was so similar to my own. To know that instead of healing her trauma she just passed it on to you and your brother. She opened her home and both you and your brother to people who had no business in either of your lives. And just like mine did - any remorse or regret she feels is shallow and short lived. Love shouldn't hurt that way. Yes we get our hearts broken by people but hands should be gentle with kids. Lesson should be taught with kindness and compassion
I know I don't have any right to ask anything of you Bunny but well - I guess my hope and my wish is for you to heal the trauma you've suffered before you would have kids of your own. I hope that whoever enters your life from this point on has nothing but the very best things in mind towards you 💙
@mytwistedsoul
i wish the world had more people like you in it. then we wouldnt be in such a state. 💗 i would do anything to give you a big hug right now. thank you. your words, mean the world to me i cannot explain to you how much... because words are not enough to explain how many times you have been there for me.
yeah.. its hard. its nice to have someone that can relate, because they understand it similarly. :( i'm sorry it was like that for you too. Ugh! its so heartbreaking and horrible that people go through so much even in their childhood 💗 it makes me feel sick!
*sends hugs if okay* you are one of the best things that have ever happend to me soul, i'm blessed to have you in my life.💗
@amiableBunny4016 Aww Bunny - you don't know how much it means to have you say something like that. Thank you 💙
@mytwistedsoul
bro 😭 i'm going to cry like a baby. your too kind 💗
No one deserves this sort of h*ll soul, no one does. And i hate to admit it, not even I do. Its just that we came into the world as human beings, and got treated like a useless piece of trash. 💗 its not your fault what happend to you soul. if our mothers decided not to have kids, we wouldnt be so traumtised and we wouldnt have been there trying to figure out how to save ourselves. but i guess, it is what it is. 💗 we will just have to pick at these wounds and scars for the rest of our life and bare the pain its left us in 💗
Bunny (:
@amiableBunny4016 You're right - no one deserves it. It shouldn't happen at all to anyone but it still does 😞 Kids fall through the cracks of broken systems or they just get abused more when they're in it
