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A Space For The Unsaid (Personal Diary)
Uh hello if anyone is reading this! ๐
I have no idea why I'm even creating this thread but i just feel it will be nice to have a place to share some thoughts or even these images on the internet that i always keep saving for myself because i relate too much but cannot share it with anyone because yes haha
I'm okay with replies here so feel free to drop by anytime โค๏ธ
Just please be kind and respectful if your replying to my posts.
@GoldenNest2727 your kindness and support mean a lot to me Golden ๐ it really helps on difficult days which is like everyday lmao , thanks for being so sweet ๐ค
how are you doing? how's mindfulness exercises going for you in case you're continuing them?๐
I hope the new year is more kind to everyone ๐ thankyou for being such a beautiful part of my 2022, some of you here really made the horrible times feel less horrible and I'm so grateful for you ๐
*hugs ๐ค๐ค๐ค*
@Optimisticempath I hope this year is good to you Opti โค๏ธ Thank you for being you and thank you for being my friend ๐โค๏ธ
*sending hugs and good vibes to you* โค๏ธ
@mytwistedsoul aww this means a lot to me Soul ๐ฅบ thank you more for being my friend ... you've truly made it better for me in many ways and I appreciate you so so much for being you also ๐โค
thankyouu I'm lowkey very scared to hope for things too but I do hope it's better ๐ฅบ
I hope you have a good year also, you deserve it so much ๐ฅฐ
I absolutely luv the gif ๐ฆ ๐ฅฐ
*sending big huggles* ๐ค๐ค
how is 2023 treating you so far Soul??
@Optimisticempath I wish I could tell you not to be scared to hope but I know how slippery and fragile hope is. I think you're brave though Opti very brave ๐ โค๏ธ
Thank you So far this year hasn't been horrible. It hasn't been too cold out this winter so far - that's a big plus in my book. How has the year been for you so far?
You like unicorns too? ๐
*sends back big hugs to you too๐โค๏ธ* *sends strength too and peace and some super good vibes and some cookies and ice cream and an apple too because we're eating too many sweets lol๐* Last but not least *sends much love* โค๏ธ
@mytwistedsoul
Thanks for validating the slipperiness with hope .. it is what scares me, there's just so much risk of getting hurt and disappointed over and over again ๐ I don't see it tbh Soul but I appreciate you for telling that i am ๐ฅบ๐
ah I remember you said about preparing for winters, has it been going ok? I'm glad it isn't too cold and hope the weather continues to be in your favor ๐ฎ
is it the anxious part of our brain that anticipates something bad to happen ?๐ maybe we become so used to being alert that its uneasy when things seem "normal" idk just letting thoughts wander a lil ๐ฅฒ I'm happy the year hasn't been horrible so far and I reallly really hope it stays that way ๐ a break from all the horribleness is deffo needed ๐ค
it has been rather uneventful and not horrible for me too and I guess that's ok, still taking it one day at a time *hugs you*
yes you too? I love them ๐I am not sure why but I just do!
Lol the apple to balance the sweets I love this ๐ *noms everything* ThankYou for the yummm foods and the super good vibes with peace, strength and love-- I need them all the time I think and have to admit miserably also xD ๐ฅฒ
me is sending so much love, hugs, strength and peace to you also ๐ค๐โค also lots of sunshine and more warm hugs in case it gets too cold ๐ฅถ
@Optimisticempath Tbh - Idk if we can see our own bravery. I think it's kind of something that other people see in us. And it doesn't have to be anything huge or earth shattering. It is scary - taking that risk. Especially if you've been hurt and disappointed over and over. Some people that's all they have to offer - it's them - not you. They probably won't change - especially if they don't see themselves doing it. *my experience is that it's often family that's like that but I know it's not limited to family* There will be people though who won't hurt you. There will be people who will love and cherish you for who you are โค๏ธโค๏ธ
Lol it's snowing this morning ๐ it's not real cold though so it won't stick around
I think anxiety plays a pretty big part in it. Plus our brains are kind of hard wired to focus on negative things. Especially if there's past experiences where its happened again and again. We get used to catastrophizing things and of course we ruminate on the bad things too. Cognitive distortions - add to all of this ๐ The problem is we can be so focused on worrying about that bad that might come - we miss any good things that did come. Hopefully this makes alittle sense ๐ฌ
I'm not sure why I like them either tbh lol. They're kind of cool and magical. Like the pegasus - I like those too ๐
Lol! Apples are the answer to alot of things. If all else fails you can throw them at people ๐ฏ๐๐
It's ok to need those things Opti. It makes you human and its nothing to be ashamed of. But they can sure be hard to ask for can't they?
Thank you ๐ Thank you for the love - hugs - peace and strength *tucks the warm hugs into a pocket to keep the cold away*
You are a good person Opti. It shows in the kindness and gentleness you show people. You deserve those things too โค
Looks like a power hug lol ๐
Be gentle with yourself today and your thoughts? Tell brain to hush - Soul is right ๐๐โค๏ธ
@Optimisticempath
Sending you good vibes and much love Opti โค๏ธ๐
@mytwistedsoul *jumps at hugs right away ๐ฅบ๐ค๐ค hugs are always needed, thankyou for always sending them Soul โค
It makes me feel so nice and cared for that you think of me and send your gentle love my way ๐คง *sending lots of love and bestest vibes to you also โค
how are you doing? we are closer to the weekend D: how has the week been for you?
I missed talking to you โค please share anything you want to ๐
@Optimisticempath You're welcome OptiBear. There's allways a hug here for you anytime you need or want one ๐
I've missed talking with you too - I try not to be too much or wear out my welcome. I know alot of people say I'm not but it's allways in the back of my mind ๐ Anxiety and depression are awesome aren't they? *smh nope nope*
Its hard to believe January is halfway! Most of the week has been a blur tbh. How was your week? Anything fun planned for the weekend?
Those are some strong vibes Opti! ๐๐โค๏ธ They come when you least expect it lol
Be gentle with yourself ok? Or try to - that's all anyone can ever ask โค๏ธ
@mytwistedsoul
aw thanks for the comfiest hugs always, me loves hugging chu ๐ค *huggles*
Other people also right Soul, you are never too much or anything else meanie brain says ... I always love seeing your tags and being hugged by you โค you make being at 7 cups better for me I'm not even exaggerating!
*yeets anxiety and depression ๐ yes they horrible and makes us think alot of things that maybe not true ... in this case definitely not true and so they been yeeted D:
ikr so fast ... I relate with you, it's blurry for me too .. idk haha time just seems to go by idk what is even happening around anymore I guess ... no plans ๐ฎ guess just sleeping and more sleeping ... how about you?
I love the gif ๐๐ they strong vibes hahah
thanks for always reminding Soul ๐ข silly brain always needs some reminders ๐คก .... "or try to" โคโคโค always so kind, gentle and patient ๐ฅฐ hope you remind it to you also.. sending powerful vibes filled with kindness and love! ๐ค
@Optimisticempath Thank you Opti ๐ โค๏ธ It would be great if we could just yeet things away. Things that aren't good for us or have no purpose anymore - thoughts and feelings just yeeted away. We need a catapult so we can yeet things super far away ๐ its a bird - a plane - it's super yeeted anxiety lol There is a no yeeting yourself clause too
They are the biggest liars. They seem to know exactly what words to whisper to get to think that way. I'm sorry you deal with them and their whispers too ๐
Sleep sounds good! I won't and don't much lol but it allways sounds good. You're OptiBear too and bears hibernate ๐ โค๏ธ I'm actually going out to dinner this weekend *gasp!* ๐ kind of excited - kind of not lol
Aww that's ok. We can give brain as many reminders as needed ok? Repetition creates long term memory ๐ โค๏ธ
*sits down and holds on* ready for those vibes! And sending some back
*many hugs and much love to you OptiBear* โค๏ธโค๏ธ
@mytwistedsoul
yes we need something that helps yeet unhelpful things vvvv far away ๐
how did you know we needed a clause for "no yeeting yourself clause too" ๐คฃ
oh nu does soul have trouble with sleep? me hopes you get enough rest and some nice self care from brainy thoughts... sometimes I sleep to avoid life xD it's self care hack ๐คก
dinner sounds good, I get the mixed feelings aww... how did it go? you had fun and some nice things to nom nomm?๐
hmmm yes ๐ฅบ thank you for the reminders โค
*lots of good vibes to swim in ๐๐ฅฐ
*hugs tight and continues hugging ๐ค๐ค๐ค
sometimes I can be a little silent ๐ but I always appreciate you here Soul and you always make my day ... so please never think twice before sharing anything you want to or dropping hugs , anything from you is special to me and means a lot to me ๐
Self care hack lol - made me think of those follow me for more tips things you see ๐
There was so many people at this dinner. ๐ some people were rude but the food was delicious and there was ice cream with strawberries at the end for dessert ๐
Aww that's ok Opti silent I can understand. Tbh - when I'm not invading people's spaces here on Cups I don't talk much anymore ๐ I do like dropping hugs off though โค๏ธ
@mytwistedsoul
oops haha no loopholes smh ๐ I'm glad there's the clause then ๐ฅบ no yeeting soul โค
yes ๐ exactly like those tips xD
oh no people are rude everywhere it's just sad like let one eat in peace smh ... glad the food was delicious and yum ice cream with strawberries ๐ฅฐ ... you managed with so many people Soul .. I'm proud of you ๐ค ... people are usually a no, so many people are certainly a no xD
aw why no talk much? ๐ is something bothering you? you can always count on me ๐ค
funny you say 'invade'... I say it Soul being kind, being thoughtful and letting people know they in someone's thoughts... the hugs always make it more magical ๐ so please continue "invading" I love having you here *tight hugs* ๐ค
Is it still cold at your place? hope the snow is not being very bothersome :(
@Optimisticempath Hey you ๐ โค๏ธ yep definitely need to make sure all the loopholes are covered
Ugh yeah for sure too many people. Was alittle overwhelmed and super anxious afterwards. But I'm trying to go out in public more for some crazy reason ๐ฌ lol
Quiet for lots of reasons I guess. Anxiety - depression. No words to explain what I'm thinking or feeling. Idk it seems like a pretty long list of reasons I have. And you? What keeps OptiBear quiet? No pressure to answer of course ok? ๐โค๏ธ
They're magical hugs ๐ they travel anywhere they need to be Its nice to be in someone's thoughts - to know that somewhere in the world someone cares *hugs OptiBear back tightly* โค๏ธโค๏ธ
It snowed this morning. Big big flakes at first - it looked peaceful out. Has it been cold in your part of the world?
@Optimisticempath ive never said quite a few things myself, so i will be sharing a few here every now and then if you dont mind. My first is: i never actually felt better when i said i did. I simply decided its better for everyone around me if i just 'get better'. Just bc i got clean doesnt mean im no longer depressed or anxious. But i act like it and its exhausting. I feel like a lot of people dont realise that moderate anxiety and depression can be present in high functioning people too. So nobody even bothers to question things when you lie and say you are fine. Ive been doing it for 6 months now. And im tired.
hi @Blueberry102
I'm happy you felt comfortable enough to share here today, it is ok but as NoneTheWiser suggested if you would like more people to reply or talk to and a more comfortable space all to yourself then it may help to have your own personal diary like this in the forums ๐
you said what i feel too... it is very relatable ๐ only thing in my case sometimes I rather not let some people see how broken I really am ... some caring people might feel bad and I don't want to cause any unnecessary stress to anyone .... everyone's got something of their own I guess, don't want to add more :/ and some not caring people would just make it worse so it feels better to stay shush sometimes :') .. a lot of times tho i blank out when someone asks how i am or whatever... like I don't know either so it is also ok? just existing idk ๐คก
you're right tho it gets exhausting after a while.. lying and having to pretend that all is good or things are getting better ๐ I wish you could have some comfy space where you can be honest about your feelings and don't have to pretend to be better
I agree with Jess and hope too that you find that support in 7 cups , so many of us here feel safer... as compared to off cups life / people certainly.. and you deserve that kind company also ๐
@NoneTheWiser always the most kind and helpful ๐ you worded it so nicely ๐ค
feeling empty .... idk it's so hard lately to figure what's worse ... feeling overwhelmed or feeling empty and struggling to understand emotions let alone manage it or whatever
I thought I'd feel more calmer on the opposite side of feeling anxious, overwhelmed or on edge but this almost numbing thing is not calming either ... it's sort of scary even ... I never wanted to find the darkness feel so comfortable ... but I guess I'm just stuck for now and idk what to do :')
@Optimisticempath *sits with you* Don't mean to pounce โค๏ธ I was actually sitting here to begin with contemplating dropping off a hug :)
*no reply needed ok? Was just thinking of you* โค๏ธ
@mytwistedsoul awww Soul ๐ฅบ thankyou! you might not realise how much this means to me ..... thankyou for being so so kind always and for keeping me in your thoughts... it feels nice to belong somewhere without being a bother ๐
*huggles tightโค you in my thoughts also ๐ฅบ
@Optimisticempath *hugs tight* You're welcome Opti and Thank you too โค๏ธ
You're never ever a bother Opti - never. You have my word on that ๐
@mytwistedsoul
*hugs tight* ๐๐๐
you really are โค best treasure ever and I wish all the love and nice things in world for you always Soul ๐ค
@Optimisticempath
I think that you are the treasure Opti โค๏ธ and I wish so many good things for you โค๏ธ
@mytwistedsoul Soul ๐ฅบ๐ฅบ always so sweet ๐
It's only tuesday but how is your week going?๐ค๐ค
@Optimisticempath It's going. Now it's Wednesday lol
How is OptiBear? โค๏ธ
@mytwistedsoul lmao yep just going xD soon jan is over too ...๐ฎ๐ฎ
idk how I'm doing tbh, just doing ๐
how are you Soul? ๐ *huggles*
@Optimisticempath It's snowing Opti I hear you there - just doing - not really doing good but still doing it lol and I laugh because if I don't I'll just cry. So I don't mean to make light of anything โค๏ธ
Jess me worried ..me hope you ok ๐ hugs you @nonethewiser ๐
@Optimisticempath Hey Opti - I'm sorry but she deleted her account and anything affiliated with it ๐
@mytwistedsoul I.. idk what to say ๐ฅบ I miss her and hope she oki ๐
Thanks for telling me Soul ๐ฅบ๐ *hugs
@Optimisticempath I'm sorry I had to tell you ๐
@mytwistedsoul why sorry ๐ฎ it is sad to hear about it but not knowing was kind of more worrying idk how to explain ๐ I worry about my few friends here (that includes you Soul ๐) I don't have many xD so I have you people in my thoughts very often and you are my safest space... specially you and Jess always have been really supportive and kind to me .... hearing about one of you poof makes me vv sad ๐ idk what I am blabbering at this point but I just want to say that I really appreciate you telling me ๐ฅบ and I really hope she is doing ok and could somehow know that we care for her ๐
@Optimisticempath You sound alittle like me. The friends I have are here. The family I have is here. The people I talk to regularly here - you too of course - you all mean alot to me so you all pop into my thoughts pretty often too โค๏ธ
*hugs* โค๏ธ I hope so too
@mytwistedsoul *hugs tight ๐ค I know you do Soul ... you think of many people and so often... always really heart warming to see you dropping off kindness around โค my only wish is that it comes your way too ๐ค
how was your week? anything nice during the weekend?
@Optimisticempath Hey you :) you pop into my notifications with hugs when I need one most - that is the ultimate kindness โค๏ธ
It's been ok sort of - idk - I don't remember much of it tbh ๐
How is OptiBear? Is brain behaving?
@mytwistedsoul always here at the right time Soul ๐ฅบ๐ฅบ
*huggles tight ๐ค๐คโค