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Discussion 01: Introduction to Group Support

ASilentObserver January 3rd, 2021

Before we dive into the Group Leadership & Development aspects, it is important to know what 7Cups Group Support.

As per Merriam Webster Dictionary, Group is a number of individuals assembled together or having some unifying relationship. While group dynamics are the attitudinal and behavioral characteristics of a group. It is focused on how groups form, their structure and process, and how they operate. More specifically, why and how groups develop.

This is what you will notice in the 7 Cups Group Support. 7Cups started with providing support 1-1s. But as we grew up, we realized that 1-1s are not enough. There is a need for group interaction as well. To meet the community's needs and demands, we added group support. We created and used chat rooms to structure a safe environment to facilitate group support. We have dedicated chat rooms for both listeners and members to provide support as per their needs.

Currently, we have more than 150+ chat rooms to serve different purposes and needs of both members and listeners community for both adults and teens. Amazing! Right?

We are a vast community and we recognize our diversified members and their needs and demands. And, these chat rooms became safe spaces to connect, interact, engage, learn, share, and grow collectively. These rooms are not only used for support reasons but also to brainstorm and problem solves, celebrate small and big achievements, and gain a sense of belonging to this community.

Moving forward, we identified the needs of moderating these rooms, so we introduced the chat room moderator role, figured out we need facilitators to lead different sessions in the chat rooms, so added Support Session Leader and On-spot Host as the recent addition to it. We figured out the safety issues in the chat rooms, and we badge locked the rooms. So as we learned more about the needs and demands, we kept iterating and evolving group support for better experiences and support for everyone. We are on a journey to build the best group support. And, we will continue to progress …

Discussion: Share 3 highs and 3 lows you experienced in the group support chatroom!

Activity: Respond to at least two of your fellow trainees' comments with thoughts on their share.

After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next discussion here! Ensure to implement the learning from these discussions in the chat rooms to build and support the group. You must take part in the brainstorming/activities given in all of these discussions to successfully complete the program.

296
August 29th, 2021

Three highs and three lows I've experienced in support chat.


Highs


1) Members expressed they felt safe while I was hosting the chat. I felt complimented, proud I was able to promote feelings of safety.


2) Getting to know members, following their stories, it makes me feel included, it is a pleasure when people are trusting me.


3) A member thanked me, along with other members, for the support they received at 7 cups. I felt happy to be included in their support network.


Lows.


1) I worded something very badly, caused another member to feel humiliated. The member left the chat, would not accept my apology.


2) I asked a member, why they sometimes behave a certain way which causes disruption and annoyance. It was confrontational of me. I didn't feel I handled the situation well.


3) I did not explain myself well and felt frustrated.


1 reply
Textingpals October 7th, 2021

Some of these are what I can relate with, thank you for sharing that out here.

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olivia5611 August 30th, 2021

@ASilentObserver
Share 3 highs and 3 lows you experienced in the group support chatroom!
My highs were that I was able to have a firsthand expierence of seeing how strong online communities can be. Even though we are all anonymous and come from all different walks of life we are not only able to help members but other fellow listenrs in their stuggles. Knowing that I am apart of something as powerful and moving as this community is really inpiring.
My lows was seeing how people struggled and not being able to magically teleporte and give them a hug! Another low was sometimes people come in with the intention of triggering others which really sucked that they were abusing their power. My final low was sometimes you can feel a little helpless in trying to aide someone.

1 reply
caringHope1976 September 9th, 2021

@olivia5611
Thank you for sharing with us. I loved your response. I understand we want to help the other person in the best way possible but we feel helpless. Nevertheless, you are doing a wonderful job here.

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blackBreeze8485 August 30th, 2021

@ASilentObserver
highs
When i entered the group support chat for the first time i was not so interested but later i made friends and it became fun
i really liked when they welcomed me i wouldve never put my words in by myself im thankful for that
i felt so happy when i was able to help someone and be there to support
lows
When a member was constantly asking for personal info of another member and nobody came forward to stop
We all support as a team but sometimes theres only few ones who dominate the chat while others are all silent in there
someone came into the chat room just to ask if someone is available for a casual chat

1 reply
secrecykhasya September 12th, 2021

@blackBreeze8485 Aww breeze yes making friends around here and being welcomed are really pleasing :) I also got the two lows you mentioned: asking for casual chats is really somewhat annoying and when a few people dominate the chat it'll become neglected somehow. Thanks for sharing this :)

1 reply
blackBreeze8485 September 12th, 2021

😊❤

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Textingpals October 7th, 2021

@blackBreeze8485

I understand how a short, simple welcoming message can make you feel so special. That's truly said.

29amy November 28th, 2021

@blackBreeze8485

Yeahh! I totally agree that making new friends in group chat rooms makes a whole lot of difference!

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Mya000 September 2nd, 2021

@ASilentObserver
Highs :
-Having nice pop-up sessions with members.
-Overall, every nice conversati on,
-Everyone reacting with a heart to my messages.

Lows :
-Tried for very long to change the topic which was inappropriate in a room but failed at it.
-No one participating at my pop-up session.
-Being made fun of in a room.

2 replies
Mya000 September 2nd, 2021

Sorry for the typos !

caringHope1976 September 9th, 2021

@Mya000
Thanks for sharing with us. I can understand how discouraging and hurtful it could be when no one participated in your session. You are doing a great job here. Just never give up.

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caringHope1976 September 9th, 2021

@ASilentObserver
Discussion : Share 3 highs and 3 lows you experienced in the group support chatroom!
3 highs I experienced in the group support chatrooms were that I was given a warm welcome; I bonded well with the members and other participants; I felt safe in the chatroom
3 lows I experienced in the group support chatrooms were that I felt ignored at the beginning which made me feel worse; a member got offended with me for some reason, and I was muted once because I had no idea how to interact in the very beginning.

1 reply
secrecykhasya September 12th, 2021

@caringHope1976 Thank you for sharing Hope :) I see that all the highs are very great. yeayy . I'm so sorry to hear that you got muted because of that. It must have been hard to have gone through that. *sending strength beams*

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secrecykhasya September 12th, 2021

@ASilentObserver

Discussion: Share 3 highs and 3 lows you experienced in the group support chatroom!

3 highs I have experienced in group support chatroom:

1) Many amazing participants and hosts take part in discussions and try to keep the room going.

2) Many supportive participants keep the room occupied and support other people who currently need help and support.

3) Many amazing leaders keep the room secure according to their role in the group support room.

I’m truly grateful for each of the highs I'd stated here.

3 lows I have experienced in group support chatroom

  1. Lack of participants in the room makes the community less active and fun from time to time.

  2. Sometimes there are even participants who enter discussions saying they’re not okay but refuse to connect to a listener so it just ruins the fun of the discussion.

  3. Sometimes there are even times where peer supporters and chat supports and the doorkeeper isn’t around which makes the coordination much harder for anyone there.

I mean each of these lows of times is not a big deal for me and somewhat it comes natural and that’s just how it is. I hope there will be room for improvements :)

1 reply
WelcomeToChat September 24th, 2021

@secrecykhasya

I can relate with the feeling about the amount and level of participation and activity of members.

It energizes us when there are a lot of people highly involved, active, even committed to the success of the session.

It depresses me when nobody comes, people don't engage, and there is low energy in the room.

The event you describe, I think has something to do with this, as an interruption of the flow by someone entering with a totally different purpose and attitude, not pertinent with that session, might disrupt the flow, and the engagement so precious to achieve to make for a good session.

It can happen both to a somewhat "lighthearted" session if someone comes with serious issues and avoids going to 1-2-1, as well as the opposite, a tough, intense session, with a difficult topic, if a "joker" enters to have fun. It destroys the mood of sharing deep issues, and could even hurt the trust necessary for doing so.

MelodyoftheOcean February 25th, 2022

@secrecykhasya

Yes I agree, the rooms are so supportive!

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cheerfulIceCream September 23rd, 2021

@ASilentObserver

Share 3 highs and 3 lows you experienced in the group support chatroom!


3 Highs :

  1. Hosting for the first time! It was game night and the mod was really supportive.
  2. Hosting a guided with my mentor and then hosting by myself, both were so good and engaging!
  3. When a peer said I created a positive environment in the LSR. (:

3 Lows :

  1. One time a statement i made was misunderstood and the member poured scorn on me lol.
  2. I went to a chatroom and got completely ignored. D:
  3. I went to the wrong room to ask if anyone could take over a chat. xD
1 reply
WelcomeToChat September 24th, 2021

@cheerfulIceCream

I can relate to all you tell.

My post has almost identical topics...

A great first session is an amazing experience.

Positive feedback is so nourishing and motivating !

On the contrary, empty rooms and low engagement are depressing.

We must get used to that, though, as part of our job.

Like actors who give a play and few, disengaged people come. Tey surely feel sad about it.

But "The show must go on !" anyway.

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WelcomeToChat September 24th, 2021

@ASilentObserver

3 Highs:

1. Promoting the creation of a weekly SA Open Chat, the first regular weekly session in Trauma after ages. Then, co-hosting and modding it, and seeing how many participants came, how involved they were, how deep the interactions were, and how useful the participants found it. This was, and is, a wonderful, significant experience for me. Hugely rewarding.

2. Writing my first script, and hosting with it my first group support Discussion. I was afraid that no one would come... But the room got full, the participants very engaged, the discussion was relevant. As a first group support experience it was surprisingly good, excellent, I would say. I was elated !!!

3. Having fun in the Listener Community Room. At times it gets so fast, it's a rollercoaster of fun. Brilliant listeners come here, they are so good and quick at throwing jokes... It's a ton of fun. Very healthy as a playtime break in the middle of dealing with so many sad, tough issues.


3 Lows:

1. Every time, it is depressing to me how few people fill the feedback form. I don't get it. Some are so enthusiastic and warm with expressions of gratitude during the chat! But in the end, they rush out and don't take a minute to give feedback. I tried some tricks, but no one worked. Maybe I am a freak, as I always give feedback, even at Amazon, Airbnb, eBay... It seems the right thing to do. It shows respect, gratitude, and builds community. But "this is life in the tropics..." I should get used to it.

2. Having almost no one coming while co-hosting an impromptu popup session, proposed by my co-host out of the bat, with no previous advertising by a Calendar ad, a Forum post, whatever. It also happened to me as an "informal co-host" in the Support Room. Empty rooms are depressing...

3. I once had a misunderstanding with a Member, in the Community Room, during a light small-talk conversation. I said about an idea that it seemed "controversial" to me. They took it as "plain bad". Controversial to me is like "On one hand...on the other hand..." Nothing bad in itself. TBH his idea was not aligned with 7Cups values, but not really that bad in itself. So "controversial" seemed an adequate way to describe it. I felt bad about their reaction, but reassured them that it was all OK, and everything continued flowing nicely.

1 reply
xinyii11 October 18th, 2021

I totally agree with the feedback point you made. To me, feedbacks are important too and reading them would not only help me improve as a listener and host, but also as a person too. Great point!

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Textingpals October 7th, 2021

@ASilentObserver

Share 3 highs and 3 lows you experienced in the group support chatroom!

3 highs:

1. Hosting my first-ever Member Sharing Circle discussion.

2. Participating in group chats for the very first time.

3. Hosting a general get to know you session everyone loved and enjoyed, I thought my hard work in collecting the questions finally paid off.

3 lows:

1. In one of the sessions, a member was triggered as someone shared about their past experiences in detail. As a host, I followed the necessary steps to smooth out the situation and fortunately I was successful but it still was sad to watch.

2. Feeling left out in a group discussion.


GoldenRuleJG October 11th, 2021

@ASilentObserver Thank you for these questions. They are engaging and important in terms of our reflection. :) 3 highs:

1) The first time I went into the listener support rooms it was lovely that everyone was so welcoming there.

2) I am currently doing a trial for 7cups internship academy and was working on getting badges which you get through group chat and I liked that I was able to help out some members and listeners in their journey and love how supportive everyone is there. Having a moderator telling you that you are doing a good job is lovely and humbling for me. The moderators, peer supporters are doing well and I’m appreciative of how well-informed they all are. A warm supportive environment is undeniable.

3) I loved learning from my mistakes in the listening room. I’m appreciative that moderators told me the importance of not mentioning members names and I did not know that exclamation marks and capital letters were not allowed in a chatroom as it can come across aggressive. I meant to use it with the intention of looking enthusiastic. This opportunity to be in a listener support room has given me lovely opportunities to host a check/in which I have enjoyed too. A support room is where we are all willing to learn from each other’s experiences.

3 lows:

1. I went to a member chatroom and there was no moderator available and notice many of the members not following the chatroom rules and felt isolated as I was the only listener there in the room and not moderator was available and I felt it was a must to politely tell some of the members to be respectful in the chatroom through gentle prompts. It was uncomfortable for me to take action of this emailing the community about this and a moderator. As I was worried about not being believed I had screenshots to back me up.

2. Being involved in participating in chatroom discussions I felt some regret asking a listener if they really said something inappropriate which I thought they said and did not know their message violated a few rules of the chatroom as their message got deleted and I wondered why so the moderator explained to me. Something everyone saw as a lighthearted humour was considered violent. So I thank the moderator for keeping me on track here. Thank you.

3.I had a really uncomfortable moment in a chatroom where a member who blocked me although I did not do anything wrong and they were rude to me appeared in the listener chatroom and I felt overwhelmed by this and decided to leave the chatroom.