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Weekly Prompt #35: What healthy coping mechanisms do you use to manage difficult emotions?

ASilentObserver April 5th
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Hello all! 

Last week we discussed: Why do we often struggle to prioritize our mental health over other responsibilities? If you haven't checked yet, please click here to add your thoughts. 

This week's prompt-  What healthy coping mechanisms do you use to manage difficult emotions?

In last week's discussion, @Tinywhisper11 suggested discussing more on why we feel different emotions/feelings and what they mean, or are, and how to stop/control them. So our emotions are a complex mix of biology, psychology, and experience. And, they arise from a combination of factors:

  • Physiological responses. Our body reacts to situations with physical changes. A racing heart during a presentation or sweaty palms before a date are physiological responses to emotional states.
  • Thoughts and interpretations. How we interpret events triggers emotional responses. For example, forgetting your phone might trigger mild annoyance, but if you interpret it as forgetfulness and incompetence, it could lead to frustration or anger.
  • Past experiences. Our past shapes how we react to situations. A bad experience with public speaking might make you fearful of future presentations.

What are Emotions vs. Feelings:  though often they are used interchangeably, there's a subtle difference. Emotions are short-lived reactions, like a jolt of surprise or a surge of anger. Feelings are the conscious experience of those emotions, influenced by our thoughts and interpretations. But why do we have emotions?  Because emotions serve a purpose. They allow us to

  • Adapt and survive. Fear motivates us to avoid danger. Happiness encourages us to seek out rewarding experiences.
  • Connect with others. Emotions like empathy and compassion allow us to build relationships.
  • Communicate. We express emotions through facial expressions, tone of voice, and body language.

But can we control our emotions?  Not entirely. But we can learn to manage them. Please share what works for you or what did you try so far. Let's discuss and learn better to manage our emotions. I look forward to discussing them with you. 


Join us in the 24/7 General Support Group Chat to share and support each other.


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Michelh1996 April 6th
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@ASilentObserver

Good ones might include: listening to music, that helps for every emotion to be honest! Other than that: walking, excercising or watching videos.

Not so good ones: eating, eating and eating... or feeling a bit down or getting frustrated and taking that out somewhere else.

Maybe I should talk about it more, that's is for sure, but also very difficult.

ASilentObserver OP April 8th
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@Michelh1996 I am glad you have some healthy coping mechanisms, Michel. What are some reasons why you find these activities helpful? Also, please do take your time to talk and share more. We are all here with you to listen to and support you. You are not alone in this. 


Michelh1996 April 8th
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@ASilentObserver I think music is something that will always help you feel the emotion, both positive or negative. And especially with negative emotions it is often good to feel them and let them out. Music has a way of taking you through this!

As for walking for example, it can be a reset, time to think about stuff, nature and the outside can calm you down and give you some time on your own with helps finding some peace and structure your thoughts as well.

ASilentObserver OP April 11th
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@Michelh1996 Indeed, Michel and you have made great points about music. It help us process our emotions. 

CaringSub April 7th
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@ASilentObserver

I get offline, and reach out to my trusted supportive tribe of support system, self care activities too.


ASilentObserver OP April 8th
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@CaringSub That is great, Caring. Reaching out to support netwrok and engaging in self-care activities can be helpful to feel better. What are some of your favorite self-care activities?


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@ASilentObserver

What healthy coping mechanisms do you use to manage difficult emotions?

Focusing on my breath always helps me. If I keep my breath at a calm pace, it helps the rest of my body relax. I tend to carry most of my stress in my shoulders and back and wrists, so keeping those areas from getting tense helps me too. Depending on the situations, managing my thoughts though checking the facts, surrendering my need to be in control can also be quite helpful.

ASilentObserver OP April 8th
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@LovingPeacefulHeart I am glad you practice these strategies and find them helpful. Heart. Every step is counting and you are not alone in this. We are rooting for you. 

ThoughtLight April 9th
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My skill I used today was to go out on a walk. I typically take a walk or two every day, but the weather was too cold and then I was too tired with everything going on. But I'm trying to make a daily habit of it again. 

ASilentObserver OP April 10th
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@ThoughtLight It is a good plan and I am glad you practiced it. Is there a specific place you like to go when you take your walks?


ThoughtLight April 11th
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@ASilentObserver Traditionally I just walk the same route around where I live. Sometimes change it to talk through the old downtown section. If the weather is really nice, I walk over to the park and usually bring a book and my notebook. 

ASilentObserver OP April 11th
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@ThoughtLight that is awesome. I am glad  you enjoy walking in nature and finding new places to read. 

lightTiger7286 April 9th
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I struggle with this but lately I’ve been taken bubble baths which is really is helpful. Just indulge in self care and take care of myself and try to kind of look at myself in third person.

ASilentObserver OP April 10th
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@lightTiger7286 That is very cool, tiger. Taking a bubble bath seems helpful to relax to you. What else do you do for self-care?


lightTiger7286 April 10th
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I don’t really know honestly…I suppose I cook for myself but that’s more of a basic need. I guess I come on here? I tried a self love meditation from YouTube yesterday I enjoyed that a lot and would like to make it a routine. I would really appreciate if there was any suggestions on other ways I could practice self care. Things with very clear steps and directions seem to be most helpful because sometimes I get stuck on something because I don’t know the steps on how to get there…like for example if I was told to meditate I would not know what to do but I was suggested a video on YouTube that walked me through everything and for some reason my brain doesn’t think of things like I could have gone on YouTube and searched a meditation video but I never once thought of that until someone sent it to me… I feel dumb but I’m trying to have positive self talk and I’m just unique I suppose.

ASilentObserver OP April 11th
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@lightTiger7286 That is wonderful, Tiger.  You have already taken a great step by trying a self-love meditation. I agree with you having clear steps can make a difference. 

TheColourGrey April 10th
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@ASilentObserver Forget by closing it off deep inside

ASilentObserver OP April 11th
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@TheColourGrey  Are you experiencing difficult feelings related to closure. How are you feeling as you consider closing things off?


strawberryjamin April 11th
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@ASilentObserver Honestly, I just sit down and stare the ceiling. Does it help? Perhaps. Is it boring? Absolutely. For me, boredom is a crime and if I am ever bored, I focus on not being bored instead of the thing I'm upset over. Stupid, but works like a charm. 

ASilentObserver OP April 12th
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@strawberryjamin  It can feel frustrating when we have strategies that work for us but aren't very engaging. What other things might break up the monotony while you're trying to think things through?

ThoughtLight April 12th
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One of my several skills I put in use has been a fairly rewarding one recently. I have been cleaning nearing a bit of a pathological compulsion. But it makes me feel calmer and gives me a healthy tired feeling compared to the usual tired pretty much all the time for no reason. Not visible at least. I just spent the last few hours taking care of my indoor plants, when I should have been sleeping. The plant obsession hasn't tamed itself. 

ASilentObserver OP April 15th
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@ThoughtLight  i am glad cleaning and caring for your plants has been helping you find some calm and a sense of purpose during these challenging times. I guess it is important to find what works for you and if this helps you cope, then keep taking small steps forward in the direction. 


ThoughtLight April 13th
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I've found going out on a walk even if there's no specific destination is one of the most helpful things to do. I personally think the clearest when out on a walk compared to any other time. I can process things in a more clear and orderly fashion. Do the best decision making. I also tend to come up with my best writing ideas. If I'm out walking alone, per usual, I am completely in my own world with just enough awareness to know when it's safe to cross the street. 

ASilentObserver OP April 15th
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@ThoughtLight it is good to have activities that we enjoy and find them helpful.


Lovleystardust April 14th
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Tbh I’m not good at coping so would love to hear diff ideas. I play video games but that’s for fun not really coping…

ASilentObserver OP April 15th
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@Lovleystardust   i am glad you're looking for some healthy ways to cope with difficult emotions. Playing video games can be a way to have fun, but it's not a healthy way to cope if it replaces other activities that help you feel better. Maybe you can check others' responses in here and see if anything strikes for you worth trying? 


healingsoul4892 April 16th
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Appreciate the prompt! For me, journaling and deep breaths work wonders

ASilentObserver OP April 17th
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@healingsoul4892 I am glad those techniques have been helpful for you. What do you like most about journaling?



healingsoul4892 April 17th
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@ASilentObserver how kind of you to ask! I find journaling helps me organize my thoughts and gain clarity. Plus its a great way to reflect on my emotions and experiences😊

ASilentObserver OP June 27th
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@healingsoul4892 Reflecting on our experiences can often provide new insights. I am glad it has been helpful. 


TheSunParadox33 June 26th
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I try to occupy my mind with something complex that will prove to me that I’m not what my mind thinks or feels or believes it is based off of someone’s outside observations. For instance, I’ve always felt sad and alone when I’m physically always around others but they’re not the “get to know you better or I’m friendly let your guard down type” so I’m slowly pulling away to start my own small delivery business. With no help or support from others closest to me, taking this journey, literally a small step at a time, has given me more drive and motivation to accomplish this long term goal of financial independence. It also highlights I’m not useless but that I have value.

ASilentObserver OP June 27th
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@TheSunParadox33 thank you for sharing with us Sun. It seems like you are finding purpose in building your own delivery business to be fulfilling and helping you feel more independent. How does pursuing this goal make you feel about yourself?


energeticAcai4232 August 12th
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I use meditation and uplift app for depression and learn things about spiritual techniques that I have. And I also have Gaia a spiritual Netflix kind of thing and I'm really into self-help books with what I'm experiencing. And I have recently signed up too counseling and I may counseling and I use counseling techniques to help myself with my listing active listing to on seven cups of tea

ASilentObserver OP August 29th
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@energeticAcai4232 I am glad to hear that you are making use of various resources available to you such as meditation, uplifting apps and so on. How do these tools help you cope with difficult emotions?


Psalm139 August 29th
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Distraction. Exercise and cleaning work best. Sometimes I am not motivated enough for those things and just watch tv or look at my phone. If it is really bad then I try to take a nap and hope I feel better when I wake up!

ASilentObserver OP September 4th
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@Psalm139 thank you for sharing psalm.  distraction, exercise, cleaning, TV, phone, naps can all be useful for helping manage difficult emotions at different times. But if I can ask you, which ones tend to work best for you?


sensitiveyogini4011 August 30th
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@ASilentObserver I felt like my partner was neglecting me. I got my book and listened to a song on repeat with my headphones “lean on major laser “. 


BUT 

my partner asked me WHY I’m sad, if I’m sad because of XYZ. 

I said there were so many things (and there are) that I feel exhausted to go through it with words. 

So he just laid there in bed and immediately went to sleep. 

I deal with insomnia when my emotions are this strong, so being here on 7cups is also a part of my coping strategy. I don’t feel as uprooted and out of place naked as I did 30 minutes ago so….
ASilentObserver OP September 4th
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@sensitiveyogini4011 I am sorry to hear that yogini. you are experiencing difficult emotions related to feeling neglected by your partner. It is challenging to communicate these feelings, especially when you already feeling overwhelmed. How do you think your partner could have responded to help you feel more understood and supported?


sensitiveyogini4011 September 7th
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@ASilentObserver I try not to think about that honestly… it makes it hard mode me to concentrate on other things like my toddler or my work 

ASilentObserver OP September 9th
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@sensitiveyogini4011 understandable and it is okay yogini. You have been through a lot. It is tough when someone close to us doesn't understand what we're going through. What would have made you feel more understood and supported in that moment?