Binge Eating Disorder ( Awareness)

@raccoonangel

Thank You , for taking the time to share . I am seeing that you are struggling a lot with over eating . You have been dealing with this for a while it seems as you stated . I am glad that you are seeking help now , better late than never . No one stopping can be a issue if you struggle with continious over eating . It is having a negative affect on your mental health as well . I am glad that you are somewhat coping with it . You can check my post on BED coping strategies here if you please .

1. I buy a lot of junk food/eat junk food at home. Mostly sweet/sugary. Eating past point of fullness to numb emotions. Immediately feeling sick with upset stomach.

2. I developed it a year ago when I started with my first job. But I remember clearly that my first actual binge started after a period of major diet. I ate half of a whole cake in 1 sitting when I was home from a party.

3. The factors for me are stress (sudden life changes), feelings of inadequacy, poor body image, insecurity.

4. It affected with how I deal with people (my old friends). I felt ashamed for who I was. I've been avoiding them for almost a year now because i fear their judgement and that they might be the reason for my recovery to fail.

5. I am practicing Intuitive Eating so I could eat normally again by changing my mindset. I'm keeping in mind to always be self-compassionate. I keep in touch with my body by listening to its cues because I respect it. Not because I want to look a certain way for others to accept me. And also, I've come to love exrrcising/working out because it felt great. Not because I need to lose enough weight so i could go back to the thinner unhealthy version of me.

@dreamycafelover

Thank You , for taking the time to read and share . You seem to be struggling with over eating and the food you consume is not healthy . Your disorder seems to be developed from major change and diet restrictions . I can see , how it can make one feel guilty . I am glad that you have found coping strategies

hi thanks for the community!! :)
i shall answer them to the best i can

1)What kind of ENDOS do you have?
- Exercise bulimia which is characterized by binge-eating. At first I thought it is binge-eating disorder but I realised that I actually tried to "purge" out the extra calories eaten, characterized by bulimia but not exactly bulimia because I never vomit out my food but I over exercised. I was confused. From online, I actually found that it is known as "exercise bulimia".

2) When did you develop ENDOS?
- 3 years back. I remember how I was laughed at for my stomach, i think at that point in time, i was also binging (unknowingly) when i was stressed out. then i rmb i had time during the holidays and i practically jogged everyday.. and then i ended up losing TOO much weight to the point of losing too much hair and reduced immunity hence i contracted shingles and HFMD. after that, people commented that i looked too skinny and i was really annoyed so one day, on my 17th birthday i ate up 2 slices of cakes by myself at night and then the "proving others wrong" spiralled out of control since then.

3) What factors may have influenced your ENDOS?
- psychological: depending on food as comfort, as smth which offers me solace instead of it being merely a source of fuel
- pressure from ppl around me
- low self-esteem

4) What effect does your ENDOS have on your mental health?
- caused me to feel even lower self esteem as
1. i started to begin on a -binge-exercise/diet-guilt-compensate-binge- cycle and became so used to it that i wasted too much time, put my results, relationships all as last priority
2. begin to cut away socially and avoid social interaction as much as i could and this is NOT helping because the moment i was alone, the binge started. once i start, i cannot end. especially if it is unhealthy food like sweet treats, choc, cakes.
3. guilt and feeling powerless i front of food; eg. eating 20 pineapple tarts after bfast / eating 2 breads and drinking 2 canned drinks after dinner.
4. i really hated myself a lot and lost hope in life.
5. caused me to lose interest in things/causes which i would live for! (eg. giving excuses to not go out with friends, stop volunteering, stop focusing on studies)

lastly, due to over exercising, physically i suffered because i am facing some sort of heart contraction whenever i run, so i had to stop running for now..

5) Have you found any coping skills regarding it?
- i tried to do it myself and read self-help books but i realised whenever it happens, i just lose control and i am lost in senseless eating.
- i tried to avoid the unhealthy food/ go cold turkey but in the end end up binging because of deprivation
- i tried to tell my parents about it but they did not believe because i was of acceptable weight but the waste of time and the guilt were ruining my life
- after 2 years plus, i decided to seek professional help to prove to my parents that i indeed have an issue. then the psychiatrist forced me to take anti-depressants but i did not want. she directed me to medical social worker and placed a lot of pressure on me such that i feel that i am a patient who cannot be cured. then i had to see a dietician but i assumed that it would be a waste of money as all the info can be found online. hence i am back to square 1.
- then i manage to follow a normal plan of 3 proper meals a day for a few weeks but once i left alone with snacks, i could eat beyond my bloatedness. and once 1 mistake was made, the subsequent days had mistakes too as i deemed myself as hopeless. and the whole cycle starts again.
- hence i tried not to even start eating the unhealthy stuffs but i end up binging again
- currently, i am trying out "healthy eating" by focusing on making better food choices instead of worrying about the "disorder" and it seems to be working quite fine! i actually downloaded an app "way of life" to keep track

5. ohyes i also tried to do a food journal. for me it didnt work as i wrote down honestly the list of items i binged and it was so depressing that i gave up

i also tired to give myself 1 minutes countdown to rid the urge/craving of smth unecessary. but i was always giving in to cravings and it failed after a few times.

but its fine! im fine (by focusing on good choices as well as challenging myself away from this lifestyle (of BED)

1)What does your Binge Eating Disorder look like?

It looks like "just one more", "an extra large this... but maybe a medium drink", an "I don't care anymore" and an "I'll do better next time".

2)When did you develop Binge Eating Disorder?

I have had binge eating disorder since I was a teenager around the age of fourteen - fifteen. Perhaps younger, but I don't exactly remember those times.

3)What factors might have influenced your Binge Eating Disorder?

Psychological problems such as my depression and environmental problems such as bullying.

4)How does your Binge Eating Disorder affects your mental health?

It has really taken a toll on my self esteem, depression and anxiety. It's very hard to stay motivated every time I look at the scale.

5)Have you found any coping techniques that might have helped you regarding this?

Not yet. I hope to develop some soon though.

@CookieBears

Didn't mean for the text to be so big!

Hi I am new to this but have come to the realisation that I do experience Binge Eating Disorder.

1)What does your Binge Eating Disorder look like?

I feel compelled to eat a large amount of 'junk food' during the course of a day... for instance I might eat a whole tub of ice cream then several packets of crisps... then chocolate... I tend to go for sweet foods, then salty, then back to sweet etc. I don't know what sets it off but a bad day at work can be a trigger

2)When did you develop Binge Eating Disorder?

Had it most of my life... I remember as a child stealing food from the kitchen and taking it up to my room to eat in secret

3)What factors might have influenced your Binge Eating Disorder?

My mum having a breakdown and attempting suicide when I was a child (luckily not succeeding), my parent's subsequent divorce and not having a great relationship with my stepdad (a bully who puts me down constantly even now I am in my 40s and makes a big deal of making fun of my weight), bullied at school and college for being 'different' and then being diagnosed with autism later in life, never being able to form a relationship but then feeling lonely, having a stressful job I don't enjoy...

4)How does your Binge Eating Disorder affects your mental health?

Makes me feel weak and out of control and increases my insecurity and poor self esteem... I dread anyone finding out as it is my 'dirty little secret'

5)Have you found any coping techniques that might have helped you regarding this?

Not really... some days I am able to talk myself out of a binge but not always... exercise helps but I have to be careful not to start thinking I can exercise off what I have eaten

@fairmindedTurtle2495 - Thank you for sharing - I know it's not always easy to talk about, particularly when you've internalized it as a "dirty little secret", but I think it's a good step to open up and I hope you know that you are not alone and this is not something you need to be ashamed of, but something that you deserve support with.

You said that some days you're able to talk yourself out of a binge, but not always - that sounds to me like a really great start. What do you think makes the difference on days when you can and days you cannot? Are there patterns in the days (or times or whatever else) that are hardest? I think often finding those patterns can help also think about ways to work on it.

If you need a safe place to talk about all of this, these forums are a good option and you are always welcome to message me. I'd love to help support you.

Take care!

@Anomalia- thanks, it isn't easy to admit it to myself but it is time I faced up to it.... the times I have managed to talk myself out of it I have gone to the shops to buy junk food and have thought to myself how bad I will feel afterwards and have left the shop without buying anything.

Other times I have tried to identify what it is I am actually craving. A few times it has been a particular type of chocolate bar so I have bought a small size one, eaten it slowly and been satisfied.

I will look for patterns as can't think of any right now, although it is harder to resist in the days before my period as I crave sweet things. Thanks for your support, I appreciate it.