Depression Community - How do you actually feel today?

I lost my best friend.

I'm okay I guess

I just feel lost, I feel like there's no use for me anymore

I feel really depressed. I feel like my family doesn't care about me, and I feel like my friends don't care about me. I'm not getting the help I need from doctors or anything and I can't do this anymore

I feel okay, not great though. It's morning and usually my intense depression really settles in later on in the day. I guess we'll see.

There's no point anymore

As my depression lifts my anxiety increases. I don't know which is more uncomfortable.

I'd like to be a whole person. Fully functional. But I just don't think it will happen. I don't even know if I understand what that means.

I feel empty, I just want to lie in bed and forget about everything. I want to be invisible, I don't want to be part of the world today.

I feel like I'm getting back into the cycle of not feeling anything and I know that's a dangerous headspace for me to be in. I feel like I've been doing what I learned in the psych ward and from my therapist wrong.

Alright, so today, i thought would be an easy day. come to school. do my work. go home. get ready for my haunted house. come back home. sleep. It hasn't been easy with my teacher for my last class always asking where my ex is..if that's a appropriate term for him. anyway..she always asks me where he is..and if he's going come back..i don't know anything. We broke up just yesterday and it feels like we were never actually together. i never knew what was going on with him..besides the fact he was always "busy" with what, well he'd never actually say more than he's busy. So i left it alone. I just want to move on. i just realized that last night, i didn't eat dinner. and i fell asleep around 8. i woke up at 12, changed my clothes and went back to bed. my alarm went off at 4:30..but i didn't get up. and then woke up again at around 5:10. i tried to look good today to make myself a little better. that didn't work. at all. i did have a period of just wanting to not even travel to my class. but by my third class i was laughing and having fun, in a way. i literally almost broke out in tears when she asked where he was. today isn't going to end all that great for me considering i can't let my guard down anymore. i feel like i shouldn't believe anyone anymore when they confess feelings for me now. every single time someone does that, i always end up hurt. as far as i can remember i haven't had a real relationship, i haven't had a person have a legit crush on me. Ive literally been used in a social experiment. there is so much i could say...but..im just going to cut it off here