Weekly Prompt #14: How do you ensure a good night's sleep despite the anxiety?

For me it's book reading. Recently I discovered telling myself "perceive all the needs of your body right now, feel it's so tired" helps a bit. I'm learning to use the grounding techniques rn.

But if it's really bad nothing helps 🙈🤦‍♀️

@mish3l It sounds like you've found book reading to be helpful for relaxation, but that there are times when nothing seems to ease your tiredness. What feelings come up for you in those difficult moments? You're learning grounding techniques now - it's understandable that learning new skills can take time and patience with ourselves. Please know you are not alone in this. We are all here with you. Thank you for sharing Mish <3

@ASilentObserver hi, thanks for replying and caring ❤️ You can call me Mishel or Michaela :)

The feelings are a bit of everything right now, depression, anxiety, grief, many past Pandora boxes opened, chronic back pain. I seem to be more okay today than the other days but the waves are coming, and they come when I least expect them. I never did therapy but I it's so bad I started thee weeks ago. That's where the grounding techniques come from but it's still all new and weird for me.

But my insomnia goes back a few years more than the depression started, after my 2 lovely kids were born. And it's only making the other issues worse. After the first birth I got myself back to normal somehow but after the second birth the insomnia never got away. I sleep 0-6 hours per night, usually it's around 3-4. Falling asleep for 1-3 hours, waking up too soon to be well rested and the sleep is like being half-awake, no deep sleep (max 1-2 times per month when I'm too exhausted). Melatonin's not working anymore and any meds work for a week max. I already got a date in the local sleep center but it will be expensive 😐

And what feelings come up at the moment of falling asleep, hmm good question 🤔 Apart from the depressive nights (which is obviously a problem) I'm a thinker so I feel like thinking too much is causing my inability to go to sleep. But meditation's not helping much either. I can meditate for an hour and the sleep doesn't come, I usually give up after that and just try to read some books or tutorials, trying to tire the mind so it finally shuts off. I usually feel frustrated I can't fall asleep and envious that I'm not as fast as my husband, 5-15 minutes is enough for him and he's off 😴

It the grief and depression waves come I feel serious anxiety and usually freak out that it's gonna be another sleepless night and that I'm so drained I can't make it anymore.

@mish3l Nice to meet you Mishel. thank you for being here with us.

Thank you for sharing openly about what you've been experiencing. It sounds like a lot of difficult emotions and feelings have been surfacing. How have you been coping with the waves of grief and depression when they come? You mentioned using grounding techniques - focusing on your breathing can help in tough moments. I'm glad you started therapy recently. Speaking with a professional in a safe space allows us to process things in a way we can't be alone. Just taking things one day at a time can help when it all feels overwhelming. You aren't alone in this. We are all here with you to listen to and to support.

@ASilentObserver Nice to meet you too 😊 I'm glad I can be here 🤗 🥰

To tell the truth, I don't 🙈 Writing about it helps a lot, getting it out. Like right now. Last time it happened I wrote to the Grief forumus and Marcello helped a lot, I got the feeling he understood me more then I do myself. I'm so grateful this platform exists 🙏 I wouldn't be able to do any other therapy apart from textual.

The grounding techniques helped the morning after but internally, at the moment it comes, I can't grasp onto anything, it's getting down and I'm unable to get out, it feels like I'm drowning. I'm unable to talk about things, I can only write, I'm used to hide everything inside. So I'm lucky when my husband notices something's wrong and his touch returned me back to reality last time.

My main coping mechanism was always music but I can't listen to almost anything right now because it hurts, it brings out things from the past, sadness and grief. So I feel stuck. I'm learning not to always return to the music for coping but I miss it.

@mish3l Thank you for sharing your experience with me. It sounds like writing has been an important way for you to process difficult emotions. I can understand how painful memories and grief might make music difficult to listen to right now. You're not alone in this experience.

@ASilentObserver Thank you for hearing me out and supporting me 🙏

I like to get out of my head before bed by either reading a book or watching a movie. It gets my mind off my life and into a story. I do have to be careful in what I read or watch though. I need to make sure it’s not triggering to my PTSD.

@akay06 It sounds like finding ways to distract your mind before bed is important for your well-being. What kinds of stories or themes help you feel soothed without triggering difficult feelings? You're taking steps to care for yourself through this process. You got this. We are all in here with you.

@ASilentObserver

I'm a big fan of bedtime stories and white noise. Pretty much anything that will play all through the night. If I fall asleep listening to something and it ends after an hour or two, I will wake up and then my brain starts its thinking an anxiety. So, I have to make sure it's going to be something that will play for 6-8 hours.

And it has to be "right." With stories, there are some voices that I just can't listen to. Same with white noise. Water or rain or thunderstorms work really well in relaxing me and keeping me asleep through the night.

@thoughtfulmomma It sounds like bedtime stories and white noise are helpful ways for your well-being. You're taking steps to care for yourself through this process. You got this. We are all in here with you.

Some things that help me when I am anxious, especially at night are doing some grounding techniques that my former spanish teacher helped me with and not being on technology before bed and exercising before bed helps or journaling

@blissfulTouch29 Thank you for sharing what helps reduce your anxiety. It sounds like you've found some helpful coping strategies through journaling, exercising, and the techniques your teacher shared. You clearly put effort into caring for your well-being, and that is goood. Every single step counts!

@ASilentObserver

thanks

@blissfulTouch29

I'm so glad you've found things that help you sleep when you're feeling anxious.💗 I didn't even consider no electronics to be a big help, but I recently have started (trying) to not be on my phone while in bed/before I sleep, and it has made a big difference! I also hadn't considered journaling before bed, but I will try that now. I feel like that could help my brain calm down before bed by getting the thoughts out on paper. These are some great techniques/ideas that I will have to try. Thank you for sharing!

@AmethystUnicorn

youre welcome

@AmethystUnicorn It sounds like experimenting with different relaxing activities like limiting screen time and journaling has been making a positive difference for your sleep. What kinds of thoughts tend to come up for you in the evenings that writing them down helps ease? You're taking steps to care for your wellbeing, and that's commendable.

I usually read before bed, and I find the sounds of waterfalls or light rain helps me fall asleep. I still have problems though sometimes because I have trouble shutting my brain off from thinking so much, which makes me restless during the night. If it gets really bad and I start overthinking/worrying I will sometimes take a melatonin gummy to try and sleep.

@sociableGrapes9795 Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us Grapes. It sounds like reading and these sounds help you feel calm to sleep. You mentioned how you have a hard time overthinking. What kind of thoughts come into your mind during those moments?

Please know you are not alone in this. We are all here with you to listen to and support.

I usually start picking apart my day and finding the moments that were negative and hyper focus on them. I have a habit of analyzing every detail and worrying about how I made mistakes or how other people saw me in those moments.

Hi,

I am facing an issue,

if i am doing something, i know i am doing it.

but i am always scared that if i show potential aur try to actively participate pthers will feel threaten and try to dominate. It has happened to me in past and happens even now if even by mistale i answer something unknowingly, my team mates go against me and talk wrong stuff behind my back and try to pull me down.

so, i try to undersell myself always and try to underperform, i hold back myself.

What should i do, i have started feeling as dumb and loosing confidence

@amicablePlane9746 It sounds like past experiences have left you feeling uncertain about fully participating at work. Feeling worried about how others may perceive you is understandable. How does keeping yourself small to avoid potential criticism affect your sense of fulfillment in your role? Please know you are not alone in this.We are all here with you to listen to and support.

I have found that breathing techniques are most helpful for me! Focusing solely on my breathing and getting in tune with my body as I breathe deeply. If I'm not able to get my mind to calm down by just focusing on my breaths, I mentally tell myself that as I'm breathing in and out, my body is feeling heavy on the bed. The heavy feeling provides me with a sense of comfort and safety.

Thank you for the great prompt! It has me thinking about other ways I could help myself sleep better and calm my anxiety. I'm curious to see the replies on what helps others! It's nice to hear everyone's perspectives and ideas. 😄

@AmethystUnicorn Thank you for sharing how breathing techniques and focusing on the physical sensations of your body can help calm your anxiety. It's helpful that you've found strategies that work well for you. What kinds of thoughts tend to come up for you as you focus on your breathing and body sensations? I'm glad you're thinking of other ways to help yourself sleep better. Finding what works can make a big difference.

@ASilentObserver

medication 😔

@BorderlineAwesome I hear you Awesome. It sounds like you've been struggling with anxiety that's impacting your sleep. Having trouble resting can feel very draining. What sorts of thoughts tend to keep you up at night? You must feel frustrated dealing with this ongoing challenge. Please know you are not alone in this. We are all here with you to listen to and support.

@ASilentObserver Something that helped me through my anxiety was writing a journal and then taking a 5 min stroll outside just staring at sky and finally laying to sleep while watching a comedy video. I don't know but if any of this things help anyone else sleep I would be glad.

@Rayofhope97 Those coping strategies sound very helpful for managing anxiety. I'm glad you found ways to help yourself relax and feel at ease. What was most meaningful to you about incorporating those different activities into your routine? Thank you for sharing them with us, Ray. Really helpful!

I would try to distract my thoughts with a good book, as this helps me to focus more on the story instead of the negative thoughts and pretty soon, I have forgotten the anxiety inside me and I am intrigued with the story.

If this doesn't work, I will sing some songs and get into my creative zone for distraction

@CharaNaomi2978 It sounds like you've found some helpful ways of distracting your mind from negative thoughts. Reading and singing are creative ways to engage in activities you enjoy. How does focusing on those activities help you feel?

Focusing on these activities makes me feel happy and filled with contentment.

lately I can’t have a good sleep but sometimes I just try to get so tired that I just fall asleep fast

@Gabrielamtineo It sounds like you've been struggling with sleep lately and sometimes feeling tired. Not sleeping well can be difficult to deal with. What kinds of things do you think might help you relax at bedtime? You must be feeling worn down without the rest your body needs.

@ASilentObserver

Based on my personal experience with insomnia, I have found that waking up early is one thing to help cope with anxiety, stress, and an indirect method to be sleepy around 21:00-22:00.

@RainDZ Thank you for sharing about your experience with insomnia. I'm glad you found an indirect method of managing your sleep schedule. Waking up early as a way to feel more tired in the evenings sounds like a strategy that worked well for you. How does it feel to have found something that helps you cope with stress and anxiety?

@ASilentObserver

Despite the uncomfortable feelings at the beginning, it's become a lifestyle and a daily routine that surprisingly curates my day without my intervention. I do feel better having seen my insomnia frequency degraded and my overall well-being improved! Wishing the very same to everyone else here :)

I use guided meditation once I'm ready to lay down like Yoga Nidra. There are a lot of options out there but this is what helps me fall asleep. When I was younger it was listening to my favorite music.

@forcefulEyes1618 I'm glad you've found guided meditation and music to be helpful for relaxing into sleep when you were younger. It sounds like finding what works for you is important. What kinds of feelings come up for you as you listen or meditate?

Reading a book or listening to music