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Relationship Stress Community: Check-In (Nov 18 - 24)
by KatePersephone
Last post
 3 days ago
...See more Hello there, Relationship Stress Community! I hope you're all enjoying the last few weeks of November. To start off this week… * How are you feeling today?  * What is your favorite fall comfort food? * This or that! Cinnamon rolls or snickerdoodles?  Excited to hear from all of you! Have a great week ahead <3 ------------------------- Are you new to the Relationship Stress community? Introduce yourself here [https://www.7cups.com/forum/relationships/CommunitySpace_1256/NewtotheRelationshipStressCommunityIntroduceyourselfhere_164924/]! Do you want to be the first to get updates on discussions and events? Consider joining the taglist [https://www.7cups.com/forum/relationships/CommunitySpace_1256/RelationshipStressAutomatedTaglist_222210/]! Do you want to be updated on the weekly discussions in the Relationship Support Room? Subscribe to this thread [https://www.7cups.com/forum/relationships/CommunitySpace_1256/RelationshipStressGroupSupportSessionsSchedule_316598/]! Do you want to help out in the Relationship Stress Community? Consider becoming a forum supporter [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSefNgW-Va7dyBx67M3d27INmkndnwm1C3Ywa7NJoFa2EscQkA/viewform] or a room supporter [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSetyJ7jp7W52-EIpqvFYLhfmpsgTW4BbzUwmi9r22OQ9AdH8w/viewform]! ------------------------- tagging the community: @00Nyx00 @1funredhead @4Jasmine @6Dragonflies @aabrah @Aathmika @AbbyHarris1976 @abiior @AbusgaKayatasha @Adarlya @adhdgal1992 @adribrown7 @adventurousPal4301 @Affliction1 @Albatrosinthesky @Allieeee1121 @AlyGalaxy @AmandaRose89 @AMomentInTime1830 @Anexmos @Angelcrossing1986 @AnotherPerson92 @answers @AntenorA @aPeacefulafternoon @AquaNavySky @Arman13 @ashlynnmarie22 @AshtynLuv97 @Asru @Athenathebluejay420 @Auditormadness9 @auntmommy @Avaboo @AveryLove @awkwardRice @azureSky1487 @Bea945 @beanie @BeginningFixing @blueberryjean345 @blueDog2773 @BlueEast @Booklover95 @Bossedupx3 @bouncyVoice4149 @braveGlobe2817 @bravePeach4448 @breeuniqemsns @Breevus @brightOcean2387 @BrooklynM @Bubbles120 @bubblyFaith17 @bunnyhugs616 @Busranurr @BwahahaLove @c9frexs @caitlin1217 @Callies07132017 @CalmingStar @Calmpineapple @caringCreature8571 @CaringCharlie @CarrieHolmes @Cexe @charmingbeauty55 @ChrisA97 @Chrisbgood46 @Clarisse29 @Colourfultiger @ComingOutAsNB @CompassionateYoshi88 @confidentVision4766 @conscientiousPineapple1782 @ConversationThot404 @Cparsons816 @CraigyP @crazycountry210 @creativeComputer2115 @DanaMH @dancersoul @dancingLake682 @DanielaC @DanielGarzaV @daydreammemories @decisiveScarf8956 @Den2542 @discreetShip7372 @DogFish1 @doodlefroggie @dopey @EchoTheDragon @electricLily13 @ella12346 @ELLE @Emirson2018 @EncouragingSteps @enthusiasticTortoise6681 @eohseo @Everythingisbetterinyourpyjamas @EvolvedScorpio @Explorer6115 @exuberantStrawberries9544 @faithfulHickory1025 @Falkenberg @fantasticDancer50 @Feepersane @Floatingbubbles @fluffycow27 @forcefulFriend4768 @Foreverchangedbyyou @Francescahelps @FranklyMaple @Freshmelon54 @Friendlycomfort81 @frostedPudding @Gabrielamtineo @generousWriter2778 @glasseyedgrace @GodsBabyGirl1981 @goldenFlower74 @gracefulVoice9463 @grassup @Gtalker8845 @GusteeMoon123 @gymnast9460 @Hailey3 @hairyxsnail @HarmonyBlossom @Hashib22 @HealingBrokenWIngs @healingHeart1111 @healinghearts0718 @Healingwhispers14 @Heartofgold07092019 @heavenlyHug9328 @helloapple1885 @helloCity5743 @hereforyoualways123 @heysunshine12 @hippiewannabe @honestWater4345 @honeypie720 @Hope3729 @hopefulPower54 @HopefulPower54 @HumorousPear1826 @iDeepScar @ILikeCilantro @imaginativeneverhappening @imofficiallyburnt @IMott71 @imrose123 @independentClementine6064 @infinitivethoughts2k19 @ingeniousfriend59 @intuitiveSummer6764 @JamilaBrownPsyD @Janet33 @JellyBean299 @jerom222 @joiefae @jwong611 @k87 @Kailah15 @kasmin21 @Katee02 @Katheryn @KatLis123 @Katrine92 @Kentsch @ketket68 @Kevin2009 @kindJoy3316 @kindLemon2749 @kizzyaaliyah @Kpopcat2020 @LadyDair @LadyInSilence @Lalonso2 @LavenderHere @lavenderOrange4849 @LeafOnABranch @LeoisListening @LePapillon @Lexloveslife @lightDrum8955 @lightLemonIsaac5408 @LightSoul108 @limeVillage7000 @Liv143 @Lovelylady18 @Lunasel @Lunaticphilosopher @luvkyleigh @lyricalPillow74 @lyricalpillow74 @madels20033 @magicalHorizon48 @mamapants @Mared @MarvelousMack11 @Mavvinder @mbrito712 @Mellietronx @Mellifluous11 @Mia1602 @MidwesternCalmSeeker @MikkyA @MilaAvery @MissDaria18 @MithLycos @modestPine7046 @Morpheus13 @MotherOfAVirgo @Mountainmystic777 @Mrrytu @MyownkindaCrazzi @nabilah17ism @navyOcean3488 @ngsuling1986 @niceCLEMEMTINE1415 @niceDaisy36 @Ninab0bina123 @ninetaleslove @NityaSpiritualHealer @NotAllHere713 @Offmytrack @onedirection1213 @OneErased @Open2Change @ouiCherie @OwenJackson73 @pandaprincess9 @Pandora3796 @pathFinder1725 @patientBranch9284 @peachkitty @PerpetuallyKekastrophic @persistentShade5213 @phia7292 @phia7293 @pioneeringSkies8568 @PlumBeechwood7549 @purpleMango7295 @PurplePansies21 @Purplerain00001 @purpleTree4652 @PurpleVelvet @quickwittedOwl8855 @quitahearsyou @Radioguy @Randomguyuk @Rebekahwriter13 @red85 @Rednuc270539 @rheyoflight @richbich @rieeavery1920 @RoboPhantom @Roro36 @RoseJuliet @rosenova1513 @rrrak @ryha3274 @Sadstan869 @Saeraleis @safetysource12 @Sailor57 @SaimaK @sarahR2004 @SavoyTruffle20 @selfloveisthecure88 @SentientiaPoecile @Seri123 @sgtdavis33 @ShareenBirgesBASSCounGDYMH @ShawnMendesGoals @She13 @ShineWithin @shugha14 @Siciturastra @Silver0824 @sincereFarm2814 @Skybar @skyfallingrain @Skywalker2002 @Skyy0 @sociableOcean9153 @Softheart01 @Solivagant2609 @somewhathappy @SophieKate547 @SparklingSnowflake15 @Spiritseaker @SpreadPeaceandlove @SpringWaltz @SquishySquid01 @StardustLetters @starplucker123 @Stephen @stephi0504 @strawberrywillow @Sugarcoat3 @SugareeIsMe091121 @Summershy @sunnyApricot6027 @SupportiveMonkey46 @sweetcake0707 @sweetlife101 @SylvestreX @Tahja07 @Tazzie @thegirlnatureforgot625 @TheMcManager @TheMushroomMan1216 @thisllpass @thisthenewme @Tiger222 @TranquilSkye @TravellingPrincess @tryingmybest7 @unassumingHuman4669 @understandingWater785 @Uniquesmiley @urbanwave @vallllllllllllll @w305 @warmheartedPlace7925 @Warrior2684 @Waves4 @Webehejdjfj @weirdbook @Wildarkberry @WinglessYetFlying @Wittie96 @WriterOfTheNight @WunderfrogWeirdo @xandia @XanFransisco @Xerah @YankeeOrangetiger @SpiritTea @Grammy23 @quietlistener2023 @HopefulOne81
New to the Relationship Stress Community? Introduce yourself here!! ❤️
by ASilentObserver
Last post
 3 days ago
...See more Greetings from the Relationship Stress Community!! Are you new to the Relationship Stress Community? Tell us some things about yourself and get to know others that joined the community this month! Question prompts: What brings you to the Relationship Stress community? What is one thing you love most about yourself (or, perhaps, your loved ones)? Benefits of being a member of the Relationship Stress Community: Give and receive support from others who are in relationships. Share your relationship journey (memories, struggles, challenges) in relevant topics comfortably. Participate in community activities and events (eg. Check-ins, Icebreakers, Forum Discussions) Plus, members who participate regularly could become part of the Relationship Stress team, as well! Here are some quick links for you to check out: our taglist [https://www.7cups.com/forum/relationships/CommunitySpace_1256/RelationshipStressAutomatedTaglist_222210/]! Join in to get updates on discussions and events. check out this post [https://www.7cups.com/forum/relationships/CommunitySpace_1256/RelationshipStressGroupSupportSessionsSchedule_316598/] for updates on weekly discussions! check out our newest check-in [https://www.7cups.com/forum/relationships/CommunitySpace_1256/RelationshipStressCommunityCheckInNov1824_340708/] here! check this post [https://www.7cups.com/forum/RelationshipSupport_66/IntroduceyourselftotheRelationshipCommunity_239/HowToGetStarted_134558/] with more information on how to navigate the community. If you have any question, do not hesitate to contact KatePersephone [https://www.7cups.com/@KatePersephone] (teens and adults) or reply on this thread! Do not be a lurker! Join us and introduce yourself here!! tagging our newest subcribers: @determinedHuman6138 @delicateVision3519 @helpfulJar5066 @Volkswagen97 @Sleepingsnail427022 @jessihazel @andrewtan99 @tidyLand6622 @indigoChestnut8502 @sloven86 @Letstalk7 @limegreenPenguin1163 @ShamrockViking @creativeFig154 @warmheartedPenguin281 @KevinRodriguez @NiceThinker @neatmarii4ta @turquoisePond5890 @proactiveDrum6829 ard [a brown and white bear dancing together while holding hands] ------------------------- Are you new to the Relationship Stress community? Introduce yourself here [https://www.7cups.com/forum/relationships/CommunitySpace_1256/NewtotheRelationshipStressCommunityIntroduceyourselfhere_164924/]! Do you want to be the first to get updates on discussions and events? Consider joining the taglist [https://www.7cups.com/forum/relationships/CommunitySpace_1256/RelationshipStressAutomatedTaglist_222210/]! Do you want to be updated on the weekly discussions in the Relationship Support Room? Subscribe to this thread [https://www.7cups.com/forum/relationships/CommunitySpace_1256/RelationshipStressGroupSupportSessionsSchedule_316598/]! Do you want to help out in the Relationship Stress Community? Consider becoming a forum supporter [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSehAkk72S0RWV1oQ5zShECQ6s-_fDYaxPE974iHorzqNRo1Ag/viewform] or a room supporter [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSetyJ7jp7W52-EIpqvFYLhfmpsgTW4BbzUwmi9r22OQ9AdH8w/viewform]! ------------------------- Edited by KatePersephone [https://www.7cups.com/@KatePersephone] on 11.11.24
Relationship Stress Automated Taglist
by Tazzie
Last post
 Thursday
...See more Welcome to the Relationship Stress Taglist! This thread is an auto-updating list. The list is regularly updated and can be found below. Please direct any questions or issues to tommy [https://www.7cups.com/@tommy] via private message. Why should I join the taglist? ✔ Never miss out on the weekly check-ins ✔ Get tagged and notified by community leaders whenever a new relevant thread has been posted ✔ Become a more active member of the community. What do I need to do? ✅ To add yourself to this taglist, press the Post to Thread button above and write the exact words Please add me. ❌ To remove yourself from this taglist, press the Post to Thread button above and write the exact words Please remove me. Taglist updated by KateDoskocilova [https://www.7cups.com/@KatePersephone] on 24.08.24 @00Nyx00 @1funredhead @4Jasmine @6Dragonflies @aabrah @Aathmika @AbbyHarris1976 @abiior @AbusgaKayatasha @Adarlya @adhdgal1992 @adribrown7 @adventurousPal4301 @Affliction1 @Albatrosinthesky @Allieeee1121 @AlyGalaxy @AmandaRose89 @AMomentInTime1830 @Anexmos @Angelcrossing1986 @AnotherPerson92 @answers @AntenorA @aPeacefulafternoon @AquaNavySky @Arman13 @ashlynnmarie22 @AshtynLuv97 @Asru @Athenathebluejay420 @Auditormadness9 @auntmommy @Avaboo @AveryLove @awkwardRice @azureSky1487 @Bea945 @beanie @BeginningFixing @blueberryjean345 @blueDog2773 @BlueEast @Booklover95 @Bossedupx3 @bouncyVoice4149 @braveGlobe2817 @bravePeach4448 @breeuniqemsns @Breevus @brightOcean2387 @BrooklynM @Bubbles120 @bubblyFaith17 @bunnyhugs616 @Busranurr @BwahahaLove @c9frexs @caitlin1217 @Callies07132017 @CalmingStar @Calmpineapple @caringCreature8571 @CaringCharlie @CarrieHolmes @Cexe @charmingbeauty55 @ChrisA97 @Chrisbgood46 @Clarisse29 @Colourfultiger @ComingOutAsNB @CompassionateYoshi88 @confidentVision4766 @conscientiousPineapple1782 @ConversationThot404 @Cparsons816 @CraigyP @crazycountry210 @creativeComputer2115 @DanaMH @dancersoul @dancingLake682 @DanielaC @DanielGarzaV @daydreammemories @decisiveScarf8956 @Den2542 @discreetShip7372 @DogFish1 @doodlefroggie @dopey @EchoTheDragon @electricLily13 @ella12346 @ELLE @Emirson2018 @EncouragingSteps @enthusiasticTortoise6681 @eohseo @Everythingisbetterinyourpyjamas @EvolvedScorpio @Explorer6115 @exuberantStrawberries9544 @faithfulHickory1025 @Falkenberg @fantasticDancer50 @Feepersane @Floatingbubbles @fluffycow27 @forcefulFriend4768 @Foreverchangedbyyou @Francescahelps @FranklyMaple @Freshmelon54 @Friendlycomfort81 @frostedPudding @Gabrielamtineo @generousWriter2778 @glasseyedgrace @GodsBabyGirl1981 @goldenFlower74 @gracefulVoice9463 @grassup @Gtalker8845 @GusteeMoon123 @gymnast9460 @Hailey3 @hairyxsnail @HarmonyBlossom @Hashib22 @HealingBrokenWIngs @healingHeart1111 @healinghearts0718 @Healingwhispers14 @Heartofgold07092019 @heavenlyHug9328 @helloapple1885 @helloCity5743 @hereforyoualways123 @heysunshine12 @hippiewannabe @honestWater4345 @honeypie720 @Hope3729 @hopefulPower54 @HopefulPower54 @HumorousPear1826 @iDeepScar @ILikeCilantro @imaginativeneverhappening @imofficiallyburnt @IMott71 @imrose123 @independentClementine6064 @infinitivethoughts2k19 @ingeniousfriend59 @intuitiveSummer6764 @JamilaBrownPsyD @Janet33 @JellyBean299 @jerom222 @joiefae @jwong611 @k87 @Kailah15 @kasmin21 @Katee02 @Katheryn @KatLis123 @Katrine92 @Kentsch @ketket68 @Kevin2009 @kindJoy3316 @kindLemon2749 @kizzyaaliyah @Kpopcat2020 @LadyDair @LadyInSilence @Lalonso2 @LavenderHere @lavenderOrange4849 @LeafOnABranch @LeoisListening @LePapillon @Lexloveslife @lightDrum8955 @lightLemonIsaac5408 @LightSoul108 @limeVillage7000 @Liv143 @Lovelylady18 @Lunasel @Lunaticphilosopher @luvkyleigh @lyricalPillow74 @lyricalpillow74 @madels20033 @magicalHorizon48 @mamapants @Mared @MarvelousMack11 @Mavvinder @mbrito712 @Mellietronx @Mellifluous11 @Mia1602 @MidwesternCalmSeeker @MikkyA @MilaAvery @MissDaria18 @MithLycos @modestPine7046 @Morpheus13 @MotherOfAVirgo @Mountainmystic777 @Mrrytu @MyownkindaCrazzi @nabilah17ism @navyOcean3488 @ngsuling1986 @niceCLEMEMTINE1415 @niceDaisy36 @Ninab0bina123 @ninetaleslove @NityaSpiritualHealer @NotAllHere713 @Offmytrack @onedirection1213 @OneErased @Open2Change @ouiCherie @OwenJackson73 @pandaprincess9 @Pandora3796 @pathFinder1725 @patientBranch9284 @peachkitty @PerpetuallyKekastrophic @persistentShade5213 @phia7292 @phia7293 @pioneeringSkies8568 @PlumBeechwood7549 @purpleMango7295 @PurplePansies21 @Purplerain00001 @purpleTree4652 @PurpleVelvet @quickwittedOwl8855 @quitahearsyou @Radioguy @Randomguyuk @Rebekahwriter13 @red85 @Rednuc270539 @rheyoflight @richbich @rieeavery1920 @RoboPhantom @Roro36 @RoseJuliet @rosenova1513 @rrrak @ryha3274 @Sadstan869 @Saeraleis @safetysource12 @Sailor57 @SaimaK @sarahR2004 @SavoyTruffle20 @selfloveisthecure88 @SentientiaPoecile @Seri123 @sgtdavis33 @ShareenBirgesBASSCounGDYMH @ShawnMendesGoals @She13 @ShineWithin @shugha14 @Siciturastra @Silver0824 @sincereFarm2814 @Skybar @skyfallingrain @Skywalker2002 @Skyy0 @sociableOcean9153 @Softheart01 @Solivagant2609 @somewhathappy @SophieKate547 @SparklingSnowflake15 @Spiritseaker @SpreadPeaceandlove @SpringWaltz @SquishySquid01 @StardustLetters @starplucker123 @Stephen @stephi0504 @strawberrywillow @Sugarcoat3 @SugareeIsMe091121 @Summershy @sunnyApricot6027 @SupportiveMonkey46 @sweetcake0707 @sweetlife101 @SylvestreX @Tahja07 @Tazzie @thegirlnatureforgot625 @TheMcManager @TheMushroomMan1216 @thisllpass @thisthenewme @Tiger222 @TranquilSkye @TravellingPrincess @tryingmybest7 @unassumingHuman4669 @understandingWater785 @Uniquesmiley @urbanwave @vallllllllllllll @w305 @warmheartedPlace7925 @Warrior2684 @Waves4 @Webehejdjfj @weirdbook @Wildarkberry @WinglessYetFlying @Wittie96 @WriterOfTheNight @WunderfrogWeirdo @xandia @XanFransisco @Xerah @YankeeOrangetiger @SpiritTea @Grammy23 @quietlistener2023 @HopefulOne81
break up? or will i regret it?
by calycocat
Last post
 Wednesday
...See more hi all, i've essentially been emotionally tormenting myself over this decision and really need some help im 20, in my junior year of college and i've been dating my boyfriend (also 20) for three years (we met in high school). to put it simply, things are good. he's a perfectly nice boy and has seriously been my safety net during some of my darkest moments. that being said, i feel like im losing feelings for a number of reasons that have sort of piled on top of each other. for starters, i've sort of realized that we have basically nothing in common. im really into nerdy *** like anime, cosplay, kpop, etc etc. he doesnt mind that i like these things but he doesnt enjoy them and doesnt make much of an effort to enjoy them with me. hes more into videogames like rocket league and r6 siege, which i have tried out but cant get into. we just dont ever seem to have anything to go do together, as he prefers to stay in and is the anxious, introverted type. i usually am the one taking the lead and i dont really prefer to be in that position. but i have made it work because i love/loved him. he does do things for me, small things on the daily like picking up takeout for me, grabbing a treat on the way home, which i appreciate so much- but i wish there was more romance involved. once again, i feel like i always end up falling in the decision making role. i dont want to have to be the one to plan dates ALL the time. ive voiced this, wanting to go on dates, dress up, etc, but things have more or less remained the same in my eyes. even with things like political ideas, hes very wishy washy and doesnt care much about social issues. not that he opposes my views, but hes just indifferent. i sort of have to push him to want to vote or care about anything in that realm more importantly, we dont have similar goals. i really want to travel- i would love to move out of the US some day, if possible, and he really wants to stay put. i wouldnt even consider myself the adventurous type, but i just feel like hes very content with a very simple life, and im not so much. i gave up a better university to be close to him, and i really hate it. by no means is he unintelligent, we have different strengths and weaknesses, but i tend to do better in academics. i like to read, i enjoy creative writing. he doesnt. i think that this puts us on different wavelengths a lot of the time. sometimes i just want someone that i can discuss a book with, you know? i hate to word it like this, but i feel like im settling at such a young age and maybe im holding myself back? but then on the other hand, am i really the type to leave a perfectly good boyfriend just to 'find myself' or 'adventure?' i just dont know. i definitely LOVE him, i want the best for him, ive never been closer to anyone- but it doesnt feel like im IN love anymore, and i wonder about my happiness in the long run if i have to keep making sacrifices and settling. ive been in two serious relationships almost back to back, 2 years and 3 years respectively. so the last time i was really single was when i was like 14, and i think that may be part of my restlessness.  but what makes this so incredibly hard for me is that he loves me so so much. i was his first girlfriend and he truly has eyes for no one else; wants to get married and everything. he's always there and i know i can count on him. he truly hasnt done anything WRONG i just dont know if we are going to be compatible in the long run... but i also know im the only one in the relationship thats thinking this. i just feel like im the worst for feeling this way, like im entitled or deserve more than something thats already good. i dont know. maybe i feel like i owe him for not running from my depressive episodes and mental struggles.  the big question is do i end things? i keep telling myself its better to do it early than wait another year and feel really stuck, but i worry about feeling regret. or maybe guilt, moreso. i know im going to be lonely without him- i have a hard time making friends, especially at this university. i depend on him so much but.. would this be a good thing for my independence? maybe it would get me out there. i dont know. i dont want to shatter his heart. i seriously want him to be happy, and i dread having to look im in the eye and tell him these things. i just dont know if i have the strength.
moving on
by BeeWamble
Last post
 November 12th
...See more Hi! I broke up 2 month ago from a year and a half relationship. We loved each other, it just too many conflict around us, we just don't get along. I feel like our lifestyle didn't match that's why there is things that each of us couldn't tolerate in the others life. from the day we broke up, i settle myself to be better. To love myself more. so i don't seek to be back in that relationship ever again. i was doing so well. even tho there is times where i miss him (i still checked his profile online). weeks ago, i just found out he started seeing another girl. the girl is actually my friend, not a close one but still. it broke my heart and my healing process felt like it need to start all over from 0 again. it hurt to see that, im speculating that am i worthless to him? that its so easy for him to get over me? or he just need that rebound relationship to heal himself? he was so sweet to me, loving, never intended to hurt me, promise to marry me someday.  guy i always dreams of. But him get over me in just 2 month? well, ouch i need a way to heal myself from this, to stop myself from comparing my life to his.
lost
by sensibleHouse6739
Last post
 October 28th
...See more hi everyone, I am currently going through the worst breakup of my life, with my best friend, we’ve been friends since we were kids, and we dated for 6 months. he broke up with me on Friday after many conversations about fixing the relationship. I haven’t been able to stop crying since. I pictured my future with him, and he wanted that too, and now it’s all gone. I feel so alone in my heartbreak and I’m not sure what to do
He hit me
by LetTheSunShine22
Last post
 October 27th
...See more I ended the relationship because he physically hurt me during an argument. Although he once promised to protect me, that promise was broken in the most hurtful way, and I’m struggling to process it. It’s delved into my childhood and caused some wounds to reopen. It was the one thing I asked him not to do - to beat me. He wasn’t just my partner but also my best friend, so the loss feels overwhelming. I keep wanting to reach out, but I’m aware that these patterns of aggression often escalate. Even after he hurt me, he checked in to see if I was okay the next morning, and even immediately tried to console me and cuddle me, but I couldn’t bring myself to reply nor reciprocate.  I feel a mix of fear and love. He admitted he didn’t recognise himself and agreed to let me go, yet said he’d always love me and couldn’t imagine himself with someone else. I’m torn because I used to see him as having such a good heart, but in hindsight, I notice signs of narcissism. He controlled so many aspects of my life—what I wore, where I went, and insisted I come home straight after work and then stay at home. He constantly needed to know where I am and would call me randomly to check where I am. I barely went out and when I did, it was awful I couldn’t even enjoy myself, I was made to feel guilty. The early days of our relationship were so beautiful and I don’t understand how I’m here now and how we’re the same people at this point. He said he’s never hit a woman before and I just don’t understand why he hit me over something so small. Even regarding intimacy, he didn’t care if he hurt me because he believed he owned me and could do whatever he wants so I beared it.  I have lost so much weight in the relationship and I’ve become suicidal with heavy anxiety. I’ve entirely lost myself. I don’t feel happy anymore. I don’t feel like life is for me. I feel like if he can do this to me, anyone can. I don’t remember what a relationship should feel like and I can’t remember what normal is anymore.  Looking back, I feel ashamed. I compromised so much of myself to please him, receiving only the bare minimum in return. Communication was poor; he often stonewalled and gaslit me, but I stayed, hoping we’d return to those “good old days.” His love became increasingly controlling and obsessive and absent, and I found myself trapped and needy, unable to walk away. I hate myself, I still want to check on him, but I know reaching out isn’t safe. I feel betrayed, as though I didn’t see this coming. It’s hard to find the strength to move forward, and the pain feels unbearable. No one knows anything and I feel alone again.  Sorry guys - I know this is a heavy one :(
RECENT BREAKUP
by lillorenzo23
Last post
 October 26th
...See more Recently had a 4.5 year relationship end. This is the second serious relationship I've had, and I'm 34. From some reading I've done, apparently there's power in community so I figured I'd give this forum thing a shot. So here we go... I'm a gay male, and I met my ex on Tinder in 2017. At the time, I had been single from my previous 2 year relationship for about a year. In the meantime, I was casually dating until he came along. We took things slow, and became good friends first before anything sexual or seriously talking about dating. What my partner didn't know (and tbh, what I didn't know at the time because denial is a b*tch) was that I struggled with sex addiction for quite some time. I had some childhood sexual trauma that I'd blocked out and never addressed. After 6 months of being "official", I cheated. I didn't just cheat, but I did what typical addicts do. I covered my tracks, lied, manipulated. I'm not proud of it, but full transparency is what's needed here. A few months after the cheating, somebody reached out to him anonymously and let him know what happened. He addressed it, and at first I denied. We broke up, and I hit the mirror about as hard as anybody ever has. I wasn't sure why I jacked up a great relationship with a good guy. I never thought I'd be that type of person. That landed me in therapy and 12 step programs, trying to get a grip on what was wrong that caused me to make such poor choices. After a few months of being broken up, we started talking again. He saw the work I was putting in, and we had honest conversations where I disclosed everything that I'd experienced before him, and while we were together. It took a few weeks for him to sort it all out, but he agreed to support me and take things slow. We began dating again, but the resentment, anger, and everything that comes along with infidelity was too much. We had a series of breakups, that never usually lasted more than a week or two. He wanted it to work, as did I, so we agreed to couples therapy. We started seeing a therapist that we went to for a few months, but when we got to the point in which the therapist talked about forgiving, letting go of the past mistakes, and trust being a choice after infidelity, he decided he didn't want to go anymore. The resentment was still very present, and basically my every move was questioned. I had to let go of friends, and the relationship started to become very controlling. He would tell me he doesn't want to control me, yet if anything happened such as me being at work an extra 10 minutes because my job is pretty demanding, he would question me to the ends of the earth and not believe a word I said. This continued until a mutual friend suggested a good therapist that helped her relationship with similar issues. We agreed to go, and both REALLY liked this therapist. She gave solid advice, with no judgement, and she listened. The resentment started to subside more than it had in the past, but we still had our moments. I was still unable to talk to or see certain friends. I had to let him know if I even thought I'd be late getting off of work. I still felt like I was "walking on eggshells". Then, came the time for the same advice. "In some capacity, trust needs to be a choice. We can't continue to hold mistakes made years ago over somebody's head." He agreed that his ruminations on the past relationship trauma was what was holding our relationship back, and he decided to seek his own therapist on his own. For the most part, the relationship started to progress into a more healthy state. Then, we got into an argument over something trivial and he decided that being together wasn't possible. We spent two weeks apart, and I thought that allowing space would give the opportunity for reconciliation. When we met back up, he was firm in his stance. We live together, and actually just bought a house (all in my name, but together, on the same street as our apartment). I did the usual bargaining that people do when a relationship is ending. Trying to get him to see the positives, ect. Two more weeks go by, and he decided to send me an email since I had his number blocked, and it peaked my curiosity on reconciliation, so I went to talk to him in person. He made me dinner, we talked and watched a movie together. Nothing sexual happened, but he talked about being in love with me, and how people have been telling him we have something special so he wants it to work. He talked about going back to the couples therapist he gave up on and how he realizes that his resentments are what's killing the relationship at this point. I left with hope, only to have a conversation two days later where he told me the other night was a mistake, and we need to heal on our own for whatever partners we meet next's sake. I felt the crushing pain all over again. I know I made my mistakes, and people don't usually favor "cheaters", but I put in so much effort to try and repair the damage I did in the past. During the course of our relationship, in trying to repair the damage I've been controlled, called names, been made to feel less-than, had frustrations taken out on, and basically was manipulated into thinking I'm a terrible person. All of this, and a complete cluster...yet I still miss the hell out of him. Every day is a struggle, and I cannot WAIT to fully heal. I'm in "no contact", and I've accepted that I need to move on, however the process and going through the motions sucks.
I am having a REALLY hard time
by BeingBestForMyKids
Last post
 October 13th
...See more My wife tild me she wants a divorce on tuesday and even served me with a PFA.  I am not a violent person but when she told me she wanted a divorce, I got so scared and like a cornered animal, I lashed out inappropriately.  I very quickly realized my errors and worked toward fixing them.  I am just struggling because I know we love each other and we have just been having communication issue for a while that we could not beat.  I want to seek therapy with her but I also know we need distance for a period.  I would just like to talk to some people about it all to maybe vent off some pressure.  I also would like help in navigating my emotions as I am basically just in panic mode.  I can't lose my wife and kids...
horrible breakup
by sensibleHouse6739
Last post
 October 6th
...See more my partner of 7 months (we’ve been the closest friends since we were kids) just told me he thinks we need to break up. he’s my best friend, and I’ve never loved anyone like this, or felt loved like this, he is my home and I’m scared I’ll never feel this way again. I’m so afraid of everything changing, he says it doesn’t have to, but it’s hard to believe. I’ve been so depressed and lost lately, I feel as if I keep losing things, and this just made it so much worse. I’m devastated. any advice or kind words would help
need advice for break up
by nomboomboom
Last post
 September 28th
...See more I recently got broken up by my boyfriend of 7 months. I am currently trying to move on, but every day I would feel a sense of loneliness and sadness when I get home. I do not know what to do now, so any advice would help. Thank you! For some context, we have been long-distance for a month and he came back for a few days before he broke up with me. 
Advice for getting through a mutual and amicable break up where no one was really in the wrong
by NothingLastsForever66
Last post
 September 25th
...See more Hi all, I am going through the hardest break up of my life. I have nothing bad to say about my now ex and we both tried so hard to make it work. It was a case of two well-intentioned, good-hearted people that wanted to be together more than anything, that still ending up hurting each other. We just weren’t the best fit and small things added to making each other unhappy. I am entrenched in guilt and disappointment and frustration and heartbrokenness over how this was turned out despite so much effort on both sides. I am especially blaming myself because I remember all the unhealthy and toxic ways I dealt with my insecurities and upset in the relationship. Despite the fact that I turned it all around before the end, I blame myself and tell myself I brought us to this demise. I am in great need of advice from all others out there that have been in these similar shoes who could shed some light on how I could possibly move forward? Thank you everyone.
He said he will not forgive me and its unfair for me
by LostInGame
Last post
 September 25th
...See more Hi, I'm married, and stumbled upon an online game. I feel like there is something is missing in our marriage or my husband was always busy and away that's why I tried looking for games to pass my time. I found this interactive game where you can marry other players and have heirs. I started in January this year. In this game, you can find a player to troth and you can divorce them too. So I had 3 failed troths already. I cant help but be immersed in this game and get attached to my troths. Long story short, I have found a friend in this game who I always talk to and share things with about my failed troths. I found out that he fell for me and I told him I have feelings for him too and soon after I asked him to become my troth. Everything was going well and happy until he suddenly went MIA for 2 weeks without saying anything to me. I waited for him to go online every day. Each day was unbearable because I feel like he abandoned me but I kept waiting. I tried chatting with other players to pass my time while I wait for him. I asked them about daily things, stuff about the game and how Im missing my troth so much and Im waiting for him to come back. After 2 weeks  my troth went online, I was so happy but it was short lived because after a day, some malicious person sent DM to my troth telling him that I was chatting with players, telling them I am lonely and alone, forcing them to troth me and telling them that I miss them so much and all sorts of other lies. I told my troth its true I chatted with other players to pass my time while I wait for him, but I never told them I miss them and forcing them to troth me. Everyone in the servers we played with knows how I love my troth and that I am waiting for him always. Anyway, sadly my troth didn't believe me and wants to end things with me. I love this person so much, since January until now he was my support person, my best friend and confidant. We have shared so many moments together but with my 1 mistake of entertaining other players by chatting with them, everything is just falling apart. I tried begging him not to leave and break up with me. he said he loves me but the pain keeps haunting him and he just wants it to stop. I know this isnt the real world, its just a game but I already invested time and feelings. I know I should focus on my real life but I dont know how to move on from this.
He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not
by Japanlover56
Last post
 September 24th
...See more ( I am 23F. My husband and I are both AD military) About a year ago, I woke up to my boyfriend (my now husband) sexually assaulting me. He was touching me in my sleep. I confronted him about it the next day and was very aggravated. I told him that what he did was absolutely unacceptable. He justified this by saying that I was his girlfriend, so he should be able to do things like that without me getting upset. I never brought it up again after that day, and I don't *think* it has happened since then. Fast forward to about March of this year. We got married in January. Our finances are separate. I found out that he had barely anything in his savings account, which concerned me, being his wife. I try to figure out where all of his money is going, and I find out in March that, for the entirety of our relationship, my husband has kept a secret porn addiction from me. He had been subscribing to females on OnlyFans, spending about $100 a month (a considerable amount of money in my opinion). This absolutely broke me. While we had talked about free porn sites (like Pornhub) being okay in our relationship when we were dating, we never discussed OnlyFans. In my opinion, this is a completely different ballpark to me. He was paying specific women of his choosing to see them naked and to interact with them, which is a deeper connection to me than just watching a free video.  I confronted him about it, and I cried. Like a lot. He was embarrassed that I found out and felt guilty and almost cried as well. He told me that he had never told anyone this before, but he expressed that he has had a porn addiction for a long time. We had this sit-down heart-to-heart, and things were good for a while. But my brain keeps going back to it, and thinking that if he lied about this one thing, surely there is more he is lying to me about... I brought up my emotions to him another time, saying how, in my opinion, he cheated on me and I felt like we moved on pretty quickly from that conversation. He became irritated I brought it up again and told me to go to therapy because he didn't know how to help me "get over it". I'm at the end of my rope... I still hold love for him, but I do not think I deserve the treatment he has put me through. It genuinely has contributed to depression, I believe. I have thought about divorce, but we have only been married for 7 months. I feel like I will look like a failure to my friends, family, and God. I am a Christian, and I feel that God will be angry with me if I divorce my husband. I also hate the idea of having to start all over... which I know is not a good enough reason to stay with him. However, I also think about how, down the road, I may regret not divorcing him (like, the behavior may come back later and I already have signs showing that he will do these things). Right now, it is just him and I and our two dogs. We don't own a house, we don't have kids, and our finances have always been separate. I really need advice, because all of this haunts me on a daily basis. Thank you for reading :) <3
Heartbreak
by Endlessummer03
Last post
 September 23rd
...See more I broke up with my long term boyfriend about 4 months ago. There were many things about him I wish were different. I let him know when I was unhappy yet he didn’t seem to care so I left. Fast forward, the break up was very hard and emotional for me. It was one of the hardest decisions of my life because we did have so many good memories together, but I couldn’t stand to be treated like that any longer. fast forward, he was messaging daily or at least a few times a week about changes he was making, he was going to therapy regularly, got medication for depression and ptsd, and said he was doing all the things I had complaints about. (Strengthening the relationship with his son, managing his anger, drinking less, saving money, taking care of his house and cooking, and etc). he said he was working on all of this so he could be a better man for me. i moved states when I left him, but he found an opportunity near me and is supposed to be moving here in 3 weeks and has been non stop talking about how he wants to be the perfect man for me, marry me, hasn’t looked at any one else this whole time and only cares for me, etc. well, yesterday I asked my friend who still lives near him to confirm if she has seen him with anyone to verify his story. She let me know he has been in a relationship with the same girl for about 3 months now. She sees them at the gym and at our weekend hang out spot. She showed me the girl’s posts about him, she said she has found the “love of her life” “her person” “there is no one else I’d rather wake up to or go to sleep with at night” and how she is so lucky to have him and all that mushy bull crap. i am completely shell shocked. He really had me beleiving that he was changing, working on his mental health and wanted to be with me. I was starting to fall for him and all the flattery he was throwing my way. i can’t believe how stupid I am for trusting him and beleiving him. The fact he can be in a relationship so soon after I dumped him, he can blatantly lie to me on daily FaceTime/phone calls/ texts and etc?? i am shocked, heart broken, completely sick to my stomach. I couldn’t sleep last night. I can’t focus on work. I need help.

Relationship Stress

Welcome to Relationship Stress! This is a safe, supportive and inclusive place where you can discuss everything and anything related to Relationships.


What are the different forum topics for Relationship Stress?

Breakups & Divorce: Are you going through a breakup or divorce? Talk about it here.

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