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So.
I was in a relationship with a girl for like 4 months, and it was kinda messy.
She's a very mentally weak person in general.
She's 16, and I'm close to 18 now.
She's from Germany, I'm from Egypt.
On our last 2 weeks, we had a lot of arguments, because she was not able to keep her promises and like let me help her and help to keep the relationship.
I was trying to help her, but she didn't want to help herself, and she pushed me away badly.
By cheating on me with another guy.
I discovered it, listened to her explanation, and she refused to
breakup with him.
So I snapped at her and told her extremely mean stuff, and that made her attempt to overdose, or to kill herself and stuff.
So she cheated, and I almost killed her mentally, then I blocked her immediately.
After that, it has been like 2 months, and I found a male friend who's from the same country as her, and had him like make a teasing prank on her
In her dm
And the friend said that I should clear things out with her instead of like bullying her online, and I agreed.
Obviously, we kinda argued at the beginning, as both of us were really overwhelmed.
I even cried a lot to myself during that.
Then something unexpected happened
After clearing a lot of misunderstandings about stuff (except for the cheating)
And the fact that I almost had her kill herself, I guess it meant that we both are equal at making mistakes
So
I asked her if we should take a second chance
She agreed, and she broke up with the guy, because I guess he was rude to her daily, and he wasn't good
We are on like the 6th day of our reunion now, in the relationship
And things have went horrible horrible
She kept making mistakes, that I warned her on, because they were a trauma for me.
So I pointed them out to her in a caring way
But it happened a couple of times
And that overwhelmed her badly, and she has no will nor strength to take accountability, she's sensitive to every little thing.
Her brain is pure chaos
She wants to kill herself, and the communication we had was the worst thing ever, she says that she hates herself, but at the same time she never blames herself when she makes a mistake.
I offered to help her, she accepted, but now she pushes me away again
I got deeply hurt because of her for a while day, with continuous cries.
She says that this is the new her
Talking to me in way that hurts
A few hour ago she threatened to block me, so I blocked her
And she came back wanting to clear things out, from a random group I haven't left
She had a confusing talk, that she wants me to be a friend untill she heals
And at the same time, when I say something about leaving her, she says "Go ahead, do it"
Her mind is in chaos, and I'm dying from the inside because I don't know what to do anymore
And now I came here seeking help.
I'm overwhelmed
My heart is breaking
Just like that day she cheated on me on
She keeps hurting me, and says that she doesn't wanna hurt me at the same time
"I don't wanna be your girlfriend untill I heal"
And then proceeds to hurt me again
She hates herself deeply
She made false promises about trying to be a good partner, or atleast try to not destroy everything again
I even made a plan that she agreed on
To discuss the things she don't want my help on, and other things that she would accept my help on
We literally had fun preparing that yesterday
So that she doesn't feel forced when I try to help her, so I have her take her own choice on what she accepts to be helped on
It was going perfectl
And now everything is crushed
No matter how hard I try, she never looks at the good side of things
Assuming the worst after everything
last night, she called me a manipulator out of nowhere
Because I apologized for talking about my issues to her
I know that I can just leave her and save myself
But she's suicidal
She already tried it before
By overdose
Nobody in my family can help or support me
They are not supportive
My environment is not healthy, or encouraging
I don't have friends
Her biological father did something bad to her in her childhood, and now her step father abuses her
Her little brother turned against her, and her mom has anger issues
I don't blame her for being like this, but I don't deserve this pain
She wanted to breakup, but the issue isn't me, she is the whole issue.
I try to listen, and think that this time she will actually accept my help as she promised, but no.
I managed to send her a number for suicide lines, but I doubt she will actually call it, or chat.
I'm so overwhelmed by everything.
I wanna see her happy, I don't want to let go of her, if she gets in another relationship, she will suffer worse than this.
Especially from guys who would probably target her, she's in a non religious area, so it's less likely to have people who don't fear God in hurting others.
I need any help.. please...
