Depression over 50

@ShakenNotStirred932

I have had bouts of depression in my life but as we get older we know time to let it play out or stay in bad or anti social is more precious .....

in reality all people have limited time......... but i truly believe when you are older you see ... time seems to go faster ... you know you do not have any to waste.......... it puts pressure to break out of a downward spiral but that is not easy.... we should enjoy what ever time we have while we can .....and have our health as i think depression takes a toll on that as well. the do overs are abundant in our twenties maybe even thirties but scarce later.

@ShakenNotStirred932

You're not alone. I too have struggled with depression since my 20's. I am 63 as well and just started meds again after being off of them since 2006. Even since then I have had depressive episodes some of which have been very tough to go through. I think we are both in the right place. I have been in therapy before but it alone is not enough for me as I have finally been diagnosed with bipolar 2 as well. For me, this explains why all the therapy and coping skills alone were not enough and I will need the right mix of meds to help me stay level.

I think we are both in the right place. I have kept much of what goes on in head bottled up. I tend to help others but often forget about myself. This being said, I think an important part of my recovery is to reach out when I can and share when its appropriate. I've been trying to keep physically fit. I tell my wife all the time that just because I'm 63 does not mean I have to be an OLD PERSON.

Feel free to chat if you like and BTW love the 007 reference.

@BearWithMe23

Very similar to what I have gone through over the years. I tried very hard to stay off the meds this time. I was just getting too down. I manged to keep off them for three years. I don't like the side effects and there's always the problem of getting it refilled when you're in crisis.

I probably will have to try therapy again too. So much of that depends on finding the right person. But yes, I like what I have seen on 7 Cups so far, it seems very welcoming and supportive.

They call me Bond, James Bond...😉

For me, my depressive episodes didn't really come until later in life, like my late 40s. I have found that my episodes occur in relation to my work burnout, they go hand in hand. I've come to realize the bouts of burnout is the trigger for my depressive episodes. I've not been officially diagnosed but when I do have an episode, I tend to have all the things that go with it. I tried therapy once to help with coping mechanisms for burnout but the therapist and I didn't click, and I stopped it after 3 sessions. The experience put a bad taste in my mouth and never tried it again. I grew up with the "we don't show emotion, stop being a baby, deal with it, and drive on" mentality.

7 cups is helping a lot. I'm finding people here who have similar experiences and issues, and just reading about their solutions and applying what I can to my life has helped. There are plenty of great people here you can connect with in the forums that will offer great advice and ideas. Here lately though, I've been thinking more and more about a therapist, but am scared to death I'll be wasting my time again.

I hope you find the support and help you want while you are here.

Personally, I just think I've been doing this type of work too long and its time for a change. I've been at the job over 20 years, so technically I can retire but if I stay until I'm 55 I get the full retirement, not the percentage I'll get if I go now. I'm 51 years old, see the light at the end of the tunnel, so I try to find ways to tough it out.

The last year I worked (2022) was difficult both health wise and professionally. I have a liver problem that flares up periodically, and when our company was sold, the office just fell to pieces.

I would say hang in until your 55, if only for insurance reasons. Medicare doesn't kick in until you reach 65, and also think about therapy again. You may have to try a few people but when you do find the right one it can genuinely help just getting the pain and heartbreak out. You can only carry it for so long.

I'm turning 64 in a few weeks and like many of us, depression has been a constant companion. I have been on medication for as long as I can remember. I suspect that for those of us that have more experience in real life; have done more reflecting. In some cases, when we a prone to depression, it can set off depression. Add to all that, the general effects of aging could cause depression in most of us.

@PapaJeff59

I am sorry for the late reply, only seeing this Monday afternoon.

Yes, I agree, as you lose mobility and have the other health issues that slow older people down, the depression seems to get more intense.

I have taken meds on and off since I can remember. I prefer not to be on them; either you become dependent or they seem to stop

working after a while.

@ShakenNotStirred932 I'm probably dealing with it badly... Am not yet 50 but due to chronic conditions & my retrograde traits (am a history buff, most of the music I like is by dead people, etc.), I often act older.

I am not aging gracefully, & refuse to do so. I still want to pick up chicks, even though they avoid me (except for those looking for a sugar daddy. Am not into that scene, thank you)

@slowdecline48

I'm not dealing with it well either. Being a caregiver, my wings are clipped where a social life is concerned. My major was American History pre Civil War and I am also a music fan so hopefully we can chat sometime.

@ShakenNotStirred932 Be happy to, though most of the history I've delved into is not American. You'd probably end up educating me on the finer points of the Civil War 😆 ...On the other hand, if you want the background/context for the Crusades (the average johnny online doesn't know about any of that) or the reason why Horatio Nelson was a great admiral, I'm your guy!

I have been depressed since being a kid. I didn't know it at the time. All I knew I was different. I could not tolerate exercise, it made me sick even as a young man. I had enough energy to pursue education and career by being egocentric, angry, and loner. Of course life cought up with me and gave me enough grief to spiral down to despair. Then I was diagnosed with dysthymia about 30 years of age. Got some treatment, got better but moved and lost that good doc. Was diagnosed with adjustment disorder a few times. Turning 50+ was a big change. I changed my outlook at life, became less competitive, perfectionist, selfish and angry man as I was in my youth. That unfortunately sucked my energy to live life and I struggle since. Since it's only mild to moderate depression, meds don't work very well. I used to have a good therapist, but they left and I can't find anyone else. I don't have much energy to look to be fair. Exercise still makes me worse. Go figure. So, IMHO, depression after 50 is different. YMMV.

I can totally relate. Although I’ve suffered from depression since I was about 14. It runs in my family as does some depression. I feel there’s generational trauma that’s never been healed.

I turned 61 this month and also feel very lonely. That seems to be one of the biggest problems for people over 60(?). I had tons of friends when I was younger. I’ve experienced so much exciting endeavors throughout my life. I’m now taking college and almost carrying a 4.0

i paint but like many of my other interests, I can’t get going. Loss of interest in things you liked to do , is a major sign of depression. I too am on medication. I think it helps keep me from the edge. I signed up for 2 different types of exercise classes, so maybe I’ll make friends there.

I used to ride motorcycles and took a class but failed the written test. I’m thinking maybe I should just buy a convertible car!! Hahaha!

more later… thanks for sharing 🥰

@Lisa2951

Cool that you rode motorcycles, something I wish I had done when I was younger. I got into music as a kid, pursued it until I was about 30, then got an office job...

I agree loneliness is a major problem for people 60 and over. Partners leave or pass away, and meeting women my age who are single has been difficult for me. I am long past the bar scene and I was never crazy about it anyway.

Get the convertible, sounds like a fun dream to fulfill.

@ShakenNotStirred932 @BearWithMe23 @PapaJeff59 @CyclingThroughLife @slowdecline48 @LostTurtle2 @Lisa2951

I stumbled onto this post and WOW. I am truly amazed at the strength and inspiration I felt reading through each of these posts.

I also feel ‘Normal’ when reading and learning from others as such as “I keep my mind active” “I obviously can't do things I did 10 years ago” and therapy. My Therapist just retired, “So much of that depends on finding the right person.” My Therapist gave me a name and I have been so procrastinating because I will probably have to share … things … that can be frightening, unpleasant, and even embarrassing to me.

I get it … Thank you all for sharing.

But you know I also have “I find myself feeling very sad these days” “in reality all people have limited time.” Mortality been on my list more and more of late.
My Spouse is at the age that an “average” person would live. And sadly (mildly depressing) I have been concerned on being alone. Not thinking of the economics or ‘how do I ..’ I have been handling all those things on my own all my life. The frightening thing is, well .. let me say
As an Introvert, I don’t mind being ‘alone’. I have not been alone full time in many many years. BUT like an afternoon on Saturday, I have no issue watching TV or cutting the grass or anything for 5 or so hours. Or hoping on my Motorcycle and go for a cruise for 3 or so hours.
But to have my spouse be taken from me .. forever.
Have dealt with such things in other areas, In-Laws, Parents, Grand Parents, Uncles, Old friends and Old Lovers are all deceased. I am concerned because this is home.

Am I alone on this?

@Barltik2065

You are not alone at all on this subject. Your spouse knows you better than anyone. Of course it would be devastating if they weren't there. So I am sure it is frightening to think about.

I am looking after an elderly Uncle. Once he is gone, I am pretty much on my own, and that is something I think about often.

@Barltik2065. What you wrote resonates with me very much.My partner of 25 years is similar. He doesn’t mind being alone. He can easily spend time reading or watching tv by himself. But he says it will be hard for him to be without me and hopes to go before me.

@adventurousBranch3786 @ShakenNotStirred932

Glad to hear I am seen as "normal" for this is the only place I know where I don't have to hide and still be Anon.

Shaken in a DB5, LOL
Paternal side of my family is long lived. Don't know about maternal side. Mother was adopted, and trying to find medical info from back in the 30s ...

ADV Branch, hanging out on a limb while being strong!
20+ here, and yea like him, can be left alone and be 'happy'
I am assuming I will outlive my spouse. All of the 'in-laws' were taken do to cancer. So far, no signs but the age is there.

Maybe it is the unknown. I am the one who does all the planning. IE: If we do a vacation, I am the one that schedules the hotel, the path, how much gasoline, where we stop, etc.
I handle all that. Maybe it is the unknown that is scary.

@ShakenNotStirred932

It not aging that got me into my depression yet it has given me obstacles to getting out.

I no longer have all the ability I once did making optimism about my future difficult at best.

@Gettingbettertoday,

I was depressed long before I was old, but the issues that come with age make it more difficult. Or at least make it more challenging.

I've been going through it as well. I'm 61, I have had a pretty abusive life, even now that I'm alone I deal with allot from my past. I have tried reading,can't focus, music makes me cry more.i work. Its all I really have. I can't even think about retirement ill never be able to afford it. Medication just numbs me, doesn't fix the problem. I feel for you. I know how hard it is to deal with things.

I find music one of the few things that gives me some joy these days. It can make me cry as well, but it's a release for me. Also walking, though I haven't felt up to it lately with this depression weighing me down.

Inspired by SunShine's thread:

@ShakenNotStirred932

HI Shaken, nice to meet you, I'm 42 y.o but I can feel you. Keep continuing what you're doing with the music blog. You are not alone. Sending hugs and positive vibes if okay

@consideratecup2245

Thanks, I appreciate the good vibes. I work on the blog every day, it has kept me going through a very difficult time.

@ShakenNotStirred932

Trauma is stored in the body so as you age you will find it more difficult to ignore. Imagine not doing the laundry and how it piles up. The nervous system has an imprint of trauma and not many people are taught how to manage their feelings or emotions, nor how to process them.

However, there are many ways depending on how severe the trauma that brought on the depression.

No matter what it is challenging and I have faced depression before. It's hard to ask for help much less give one's self permission to 'go there'.

It does plie up. And then you have meltdowns, which has happened to me. Thankfully not often, but I (like most men) tend to bottle my feelings up.

I do have an issue asking for help. I was an only child and I learned to look after myself early on. There are both good and bad aspects to that. Right now, I am just coming out of a down phase.

@ShakenNotStirred932

Many older people deal with loneliness; which I think is a big factor in depression. Sometimes the loneliness is due to lack of a romantic partner or just friends in general. I think this can often get worse after retirement; when we no longer have our usual routine. I am 65 and have been alone longer than I care to admit. While it’s not an issue most of the time, it seems more difficult to deal with as time passes.

@UberRuminator

I absolutely agree with the above. I do miss my co-workers, and I also live in a much different area. I have had issues meeting people here.

@ShakenNotStirred932

I am introverted which makes meeting people difficult in general. I don’t know what I’d do if I had to move.