My pain

Hi - 👏🏽. Congrats on being brave and sharing your story with us ! Better times are coming for sure

Hi there, it's okay to feel the way you do, you're entitled to it. You'll make it through. When you feel in low spirits look at the sky, there is a espace there with the shape of you, you are loved as you have a place in this world. 💜

Wow just seeing this for some reason and thank you so kindly for that. I hope someday I will feel that way. But I do have hope because of people like you

Your story is very touching. Appreciated you shared it. Thanks for your nice words they mean a lot 💕

I am so sorry for what you went through in your life.

My heart truly goes out to you. It sounds like you are naturally a caregiver and your son is very lucky to have a father who loves him so much.

I know how bad the pain is from the betrayal of being cheated on. It's been a little over 2 years since i found out and I'm still drowning. I'm glad you have your son. It's not comparable, but I know when I found outni poured all my love and energy into my dog. My dog saved my life many times as I wanted to find a permanent way to end the pain, but couldn't do it because he loved me so much.

Is the mother no contact with your son?

Also, it's sad how people can hurt us and impact how we feel about ourselves. I gave everything I had into my relationship and I felt he never did. I did a lot for him and helped him turn his life around.

He was really selfish and immature and wanted to feel emotionally supported and never knew how to reciprocate or understand empathy. That made me feel like I was unworthy. I'm sorry she did that to you, I feel the same way about people now.

I never trust anyone anymore. I hope in time we both find some way to heal and feel peace

Ya the mom has seen him a total of 5 times in the 16 years he's been alive.

that is so sad

@zeetee17 her loss he's a great kid. I know every parent says that but he really is.

He's lucky to have you

Thank you that means alot

I think I'm more lucky to have him

that's so sweet. yes, children give us a lot to live for

There's alot if times he's the only thing. He's my way to ground myself. Like I can be feeling like everything is falling apart and nothing is going to improve and when I look into his eyes it all disappears all of a sudden nothing is going to defeat me everything will be ok.

I'm happy you have this in your life, given everything you've been through. I want this for myself and look forward to having it. I believe children can bring out the best of who we could be despite our tragedies.

I really hope you live a good happy life with your son❤️

It's absolutely comparable. Hurt betrayal trauma it all feels the same and does the same damage. We are in this together we are all people who gave are all to someone who told us and made us believe we have no value and we believed them. But I see value in you as you see value in me. I guess you have to have a heart filled with love and empathy to truly be able to assess value. ❤️‍🩹

I truly appreciate this measage

It's the truth I'm just stating it lol

@JustCory88 I can relate to your childhood I think. Where you locked in the attic, cause you were a slave too? I wasn't allowed to communicate with anyone either, till I was rescued when I was 18. Your incredibly lucky to have Dawson ❤ the closest thing to heaven is a child ❤ I'm sorry about your loss, and your wife, and sons mum😥 but don't give up on people yet, there are more good people than bad in this world. And in the end love always wins ❤ the first time I ever felt loved was right here on cups😁 so you've came to the right place here, I hope you find all the support, love and friendship you deserve here ❤ gives you a giant tiny hug ❤

Not locked but knew better than to leave my bed

@JustCory88 😥 people can be very cruel, living in fear, is just the worst. Hugs you tightly ❤

@Tinywhisper11 it's the human condition. I appreciate it.

Thank you all for your kind words. I appreciate it. I won't let it change my heart but it hurts none the lees.

Hi. Thank you for sharing, I imagine that was maybe hard. I’m so sorry you’ve gone through all that. I have an unhealthy view on relationship I think…but I strongly feel that all people will hurt you. Forget them and show them you’re fine without them. Hopefully you’ll find support/friendship in this app. I’m hoping for the same.

Yes it was hard because I didn't understand why. What did I do that was so terrible.

@JustCory88

Hi!

It sounds like you've been through incredibly challenging times, from a difficult childhood to the loss of loved ones and betrayal in relationships. It's clear you've faced a lot of pain and isolation, and it's admirable how you've taken on responsibilities like raising your son and caring for your father.

I can't imagine how hard it must have been to experience such profound losses, especially the betrayal from someone you trusted during a time of deep personal grief. It's understandable that you would feel like withdrawing and losing faith in people's intentions.

It sounds like your son Dawson is incredibly important to you, and it's wonderful that you have such a strong bond with him. However, it's also natural to want adult companionship and someone to talk to outside of your own thoughts. 

Would you like to talk more about how these experiences have affected you emotionally? Have you had a chance to process your feelings about the betrayal and the loss of your dad and your marriage? How are you managing your own well-being during this time?

@AmyPondd processing as in trying to make sense of things and figure out where and what went wrong. I do alot of internalizing and breaking things down including myself because that's all I've known. I think about all of it alot my mind is never quiet never have peace. 

@JustCory88 I’m sorry to hear everything you’ve been through. I relate to the confined childhood, and being used and betrayed as an adult. I ask the same kinds of questions, why, what did I do to deserve it. It’s hard to get over, like I’ve always thought that if I could figure out why then maybe I could move on easier.

I’m learning that sometimes we might find out why, but most of the time we’re not going to get those answers. There are reasons, but they’re not going to make sense to us because we’re not like that. People react differently to life, and it isn’t part of your personality to treat others the way they’ve treated you. Some people are comfortable taking, whenever others give they just think it’s ok, and it isn’t a natural thought for them to give back. Or they take and think they’re entitled to even more. Maybe it has nothing to do with that at all but it’s just about them and their own self image. Maybe your ex was just someone who was addicted to attention from men, and nothing you did or didn’t do would have changed that.

The point is, whatever the reason, I don’t think it had anything to do with you. I understand really well wanting to know why, as you put it, statistically so much has been put on one person. This is probably a *** answer I’m sorry, but I think good people do suffer more. Because it’s an easier road to use others and only think of yourself. It’s harder to be selfless, dedicated, and hardworking. It is tempting sometimes then to want to ditch the goodness and be like them. But I think there’s so much of life that they miss that you already experience. You understand, feel, and appreciate real, deep love like you have for your son and he has for you. You have a strength of character that people will notice and admire. Even already on this site, people see it. People will in your life too, they may just be harder to find. 

I’m not sure if this helps, but your story really spoke to me, and I wanted to help lift you up. Keep being who you are. Try not to let the weight of doing good discourage you. It is ok to be watchful and protect yourself. But you are amazing the way you are. 

You spoke directly to my heart honestly. You were dead on with your assessment and literally word for word described what I felt and was thinking. You're empathy is am amazing gift. Thank you for this it truly does mean alot more than you realize.

Will do and thank you again

@JustCory88 Yay we are happy to know that someone supported you here at 7 cups of tea. This makes me happy to know that people still love helping others.💔

Thank for sharing! Your story is powerful and heartbreaking and beautiful all in one. Your dedication to your son is inspiring! Your story could be the key to unlock someone else’s prison and it was very brave of you to share it here! Your words touched my heart and makes me wish I could give you a big hug. You’re not alone in this roller coaster life we are all living and I am glad you found this app and decided to give 7 cups a try! You’ll find a wonderful community here and I’m sure you will now have many new adults to talk to! Most of my conversations (at least the ones outside of my head) are with my 3 year old, so I soooooo relate to wanting and needing adult conversation in your life!!!

Yes it's definitely isn't the same as having an adult lol. I'm here if you ever want to talk. I'm a good listener

I want to thank you for you kind message. I don't remember the last time I had positive adult interaction I'm hoping this is a turning point for me. I want you to know I am here for you as well I actually enjoy listening more than talking. So feel free to message me anytime

@JustCory88

Thank you for sharing your deeply personal journey with us. Your strength and resilience are truly inspiring, especially in light of the hardships you've faced from such a young age. It's clear that you've endured so much and carried heavy burdens, yet you've continued to show unwavering love and dedication to your son, Dawson.

The loss of your father and the betrayal by your wife during such a vulnerable time must have been devastating. It's completely understandable to feel overwhelmed and to question trust in others. The wounds you carry run deep, and it's okay to take time to heal and process everything you've been through.

It's heartening to hear that you found solace and healing in caring for your father during his final days. That experience, while incredibly difficult, allowed for a profound connection and closure that you needed.

As you navigate this new chapter, please know that you're not alone. Connecting with others, like you're doing here, is a positive step forward.

You are deserving of love and companionship, and your dedication to Dawson is a testament to your strength as a father. Take each day as it comes, and remember to be kind to yourself along the way. Your courage in reaching out is a powerful reminder of your resilience.

Warm regards,

Thank you that means alot. I know that when I went through what i did as a child that it wasn't him it was his addiction and all I sought after was his love which remained the same desire throughout my life. He let go after I told him I forgave him even though i told him I wasn't holding onto it and that it wasn't a big deal it was important to him. A lot of the pain came from i felt like when I finally got his love when he finally saw me I mean actually saw me as a person, a son .. I immediately lost him. I know that's probably selfish to think because I know the struggle and pain he was in not being able to take care of himself throughout the process took a toll as well but I didn't mind I just wanted my dad

@JustCory88

Your ability to forgive and offer understanding, even amidst your own pain, speaks volumes about your character.. I hope that sharing your story here brings you some comfort and support. You're not alone in navigating these emotions, and your courage in facing them head-on is truly admirable.

Sending you strength, warmth, and love

@BlossomGirvan thank you

@JustCory88 I’m sorry you grew up d’îlotages like that plus all you went through in adulthood. It can be really tough opening up to someone on a real level. Keep hanging on. I hope it gets better for you.

@Frustratedgal23 I appreciate you