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Jill Kapil, PsyD
Psychologist
I have over 9 years of clinical experience, specialize in anxiety, and am passionate about my work. My approach is collaborative, empathic, supportive, and goal-oriented.
Top Rated Answers
It it honestly depends on the person. Both my brother and I have ADHD but in some ways are very different. I struggle with concentration, you could be talking to me about something and i would listen for a few seconds but literally forget to listen any more. I can't sit still, i forget things very easy, I can be very unorganized, I also have hyperactivity and hyper focus. On the contrary, my brother has constant mood swings, he talks a lot, literally always has to be doing something with his hands, and cannot ever sit down. We also both suffer with night terrors, his more often and severe than mine. So again, it really just depends on the situation. Hope this helps :)
When people with ADHD see themselves as undependable, they begin to doubt their talents and feel the shame of being unreliable.
Anonymous
September 13th, 2018 12:05am
ADHD typically has 3 main symptoms -- inattentiveness, hyperactivity, and impulsive tendencies. a person with adhd can have any combination of those main symptoms. more specific traits are, for inattentiveness: being forgetful, difficulty focusing/staying on task even for interesting subjects, executive dysfunction, doesn't seem to listen even if directly spoken to, "spaces out" frequently. for hyperactivity: trouble sitting still, fidgeting, has urges to run/climb in inappropriate settings, talks over others, can't wait their turn. lastly, impulsive tendencies: takes risks, trouble making good choices, interruptive. these symptoms make it very tough to function, especially in school or work. it's a serious problem which is more than just being hyper or lazy. talk to your doctor if you think you experience a lot of these symptoms.
Anonymous
November 15th, 2018 2:32pm
Judgment is a huge struggle people with ADHD Face. if you have ADHD your brain is not neurotypical. Yet so many people think that it's just an excuse. People with ADHD just need discipline. They need a firm hand when being dealt with. No ADHD is not something that can be disciplined out of a person. i parent a child with ADHD and no amount of discipline can get him to focus when he's in the attention deficit phase of his condition. There's also struggles with fitting in when your brain doesn't quite work the same as others or you need the stimulation of activity to help you gain focus. it's tough having an invisible condition that still not a lot of people understand. if only people were sensitive and took time to understand the brain of someone with ADHD because we are awesome people. :)
Anonymous
January 16th, 2019 4:04am
Focusing on anything at all is a struggle. It makes learning very difficult and challenging. It's like constantly being distracted. It takes a lot of focus to pay attention and even when I do I am thinking about other things half of the time. My mind is constantly running on a treadmill of sorts. I can almost never focus solely on one thing. Having ADHD is like constantly multitasking for no reason. It makes it easier to get stressed because it is easy to get distracted and behind. Personally I struggle to keep my mind under control, I am constantly thinking about more than one thing.
People with ADHD can struggle with some of the following side effect s through life, lack of concentration, fidgeting, bursts of over excitement that can lead to irrational thinking and in some cases temper problems
Not being able to hold a conversation without veering off course or forgetting what you were going to say half way through talking and then having to apologize to someone because they think that you don’t care enough about the conversation or that you’re bored talking to them. Also trying to stay on task for even a short period of time. The slightest movement or flicker of light can distract you and cause you to go off into your own little world in your head where you lose track of time and sometimes completely forget what you were doing in the first place
If you're undiagnosed, at whatever age, you likely feel guilt and shame at not being able to perform as quickly (or quietly) as others do. Diagnosis can be a relief, to know that there is something biologically off inside of you and it's not inherent to your personality and who you are that you have trouble focusing or act disinterested. Whether you are an adult or a child, being given medication can be quite helpful, but for others the side effects are a trial of their own. People with ADHD generally perform behind their peers even though they have just as much ability and intellect as the others, only they don't understand that it's not their fault.
I find my memory suffers a lot, I forget things often, sometimes I forget what I'm saying mid conversation. I forget where I've left things, I forget appointments, I forget who I've told what. I find it extremely difficult to stay focused on any particular project that doesn't spark interest and find myself getting exhausted when I force focus and usually need a nap afterwards and am unable to attempt any other task. I get carried away constantly on unrelated topics, I call it rabit-holing but it's commonly known as hyperfocus. I can spend hours on something unimportant and fail to eat, move or even take toilet breaks, I frequently find myself sitting in a dark room as I haven't noticed time passing. It affects every aspect of my life really.
As a person with ADHD, I can say that learning in a school environment, and working in a office are very hard for me. It feels like you’re constantly bubbling under your skin, ready to burst out at any moment. By bursting, I mean shouting standing up and walking around. It essentials feels like you’re a child on a 24/7 sugar high that you can’t control no matter how hard you try. For me fidget tools help me concentrate, and some of my friends take meds, but it’s best to do what works best for you. Hope this helps!
People with ADHD struggle with a variety of different issues. Many people with ADHD not only have ADHD but have other disabilities as well. They can have co morbid disabilities like depression, body image issues, eating disorders, anxiety and other learning differences. They can face struggles on jobs and in everyday life. Many people with ADHD also have Executive function disorders which excubate the ability to organize and prioritize and it can affect you at work or school. Accommodations are available on the job and in School. I was told because of the ADHD I would never succeed in college I am almost finished with my second Masters degree. I am now pursuing counseling to help other people that have struggle with disabilities.
Anonymous
April 25th, 2018 10:04pm
People with ADHD like myself struggle with constantly moving, slower mental, emotional, and intellectual maturity. A way to help with it is by a cheesy as it sounds is meditation, if anyone wants some tips then just message me, but it really does help me stay in control of my outbursts.
People with ADHD face humiliation and/or ridicule for their inability to sit still and often other problems like not being able to pay attention-subsequently causing a fall behind others and a race to catch up along with a difficulty in relationships-, or extra responsibilities in life-remembering to take medicine periodically, extra self-control, a need to reach out for help that others do not experience- which can lead to other negative psychological characteristics with anxiety and depression being common. Even just the label of ADHD closes doors for people, causing them to lose opportunities and jobs to those without this distinct classification.
Generally ADD/ADHD can be very confusing. Especially if diagnosed late (like in adulthood).
We grow up getting told how people work and learning from watching others but we do not realize we got a manual that does not apply to us.
When diagnosed early, you grow up learning how the ADHD brain differs from a stereo typical one. When not diagnosed, one does not know these differences even exist in the first place.
This can lead to low self-esteem, anxiety, depression and other mental problems. Also late diagnosis makes it harder for a person to change behaviours that just do not work with an ADHD brain but were lived their whole live.
Everyone experienced ADHD differently, ADHD comes in many different flavours.
There's the obvious main flavours of ADHD, attention deficit, where we struggle to hold our attention onto certain things, and hyperactivity, where we experience an excess of energy, and these can also be combined in an individual BUT there is also a lot more to ADHD that you wouldn't expect such as;
Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD): A common occurrence in those with ADHD where we have severely negative perceptions of social interactions, that aren't necessarily realistic, and we also second guess ourselves and constantly fear rejection and overemphasise any rejection we do face.
Impulse Control
Difficulties with executive functioning, such as performing basic tasks like brushing our teeth or showering that others may find simple.
Difficulty with emotional control as well as understanding emotions.
Anonymous
September 22nd, 2019 12:18am
Struggles only people with ADHD can understand
1. Nothing on earth is interesting enough to keep your attention over the sound of loud shoes click clacking against the floor.
2. You know the easiest way to clean a room is to throw everything away.
3. As soon as you let me know you got adult ADHD, you get to hear a half-hour tale on how they also have someone with ADHD but are not diagnosed and how they do all the same things and they totally relate.
4. Whenever anyone tells you that, you just lack discipline.
5. You get highway hypnosis from reading long books.
6. When you have to work in any open space that is not the quietest, emptiest, most boring library ever.
7. The one time you found your purse in the fridge.
8. Every time, there is something that keeps getting you… missing the little details.
9. You keep 23 windows open on your computer.
Anonymous
September 22nd, 2019 7:57am
I struggle the most with saying things impulsively, I don't think about the things I say and well I'm always afraid it sounded rude or that I've hurt them...
I also have problems with concentration, I can't focus myself on things for a long time and I get bored very easily. So while making homework I just get distracted very fast, which makes me take a lot longer on my homework than I should.
And well I have more energy than other people, normally, and haha, I talk a lot. I just hope that I'm not bothering people with that.
Hyperactivity, reading difficulties, focusing issues, social isolation, not able to express their true talents. ADHD persons are true geniuses, most of the well known scientist and artists had it including, Albert Einstein, Leonardo Davinci to name a few. They understand the 3D world in a fascinating way and if they learn to work with it they can achieve fulfillment to their life. In the past it has been treated with various substances like Retalin and that cause a big dissasociation and social disturbance. Nowadays there is a greater understanding into the mechanism that cause it and can be treated as well as identified from small ages.
Oh, my friend, where do I start? There are so many struggles that these people have to deal with. Many good websites give a lot of information about ADHD and also tips about how to deal with it from the inside and a bystander perspective. What I can tell you about what it feels like to live with ADHD is from personal experience. One thing that is not often talked about is that ADHD almost always comes with an impossibly low self-image. This is caused by the failure to fit in a normal life pattern from childhood on. Also you always just know that you are different from others and because of previous failing experiences you instantly assume that you are the wrong one. Another thing that is not often mentioned is that while other people might have trouble understanding and dealing with ADHD behaviour at times, it is way harder to deal with and understand it yourself. you have low impulse-control so it is hard to regulate behaviour. That doesn't mean you are not aware of it. You are aware, you notice that you do not behave the way everyone else does, you assume you are wrong and want to change but also it is really hard to change. It is an internal struggle that is immense hard. it is very hard to be patient with yourself and to be kind to yourself.
Anonymous
October 11th, 2019 10:35am
there are lots of different symptoms of ADHD, some struggle with panic attacks and not knowing what they are doing could come across dangerous and felling they do not fit in. i have ADHD my self and its a daily struggle not knowing how this day is going to be like, some times i just have to think that every one is different and you can learn how to live with it as other people wont learn how to live like you do. even just listening more and not let others bring you down will help. a big one is think before you do. having a friendship group is great but make sure you have at least one friend that you you trust well so you can talk to them and feel comfortable.
I do not have ADHD myself, however I am close with a lot of people who do. I think one of the main challenges that comes with ADHD is the hyperactiviy part. One of my friends gets bullied at school because they think he is "weird" for being really hyper and expressive. He gets very excited when listening to music and lip synchs the lyrics as if he were at a concert. i find this very cute and I love him. However the other kids at my school think he is a freak and a weirdo. I think this is very unfair and just horrible because is it not something he can control. Some people are just plain mean. I think a very big struggle are the social obstacles they face due to their disorder.
Anonymous
December 28th, 2019 3:38am
Lost of people with ADHD have trouble focusing, this is one of the main things. For example, some people with ADHD might talk a lot in certain situations. Another thing that ties into the issue with focusing is listening. For example, if a teacher is talking, a kid will not be listening and thinking about a completely different subject. This is why lots of kids with ADHD don't get great grades. Also, people with ADHD fidget a lot. This could be tapping, biting a pencil and other movements. This can be similar to anxiety. Lastly, making friends is a big one or just socializing in general. Most of the time they are awkward when talking to others or they have a hard time talking to them.
Having ADHD can manifest in many ways and result it misdiagnosis quite often. The individual may have substance abuse issues, behavioral issues, social anxiety, depression, anger issues, and isolate. Individuals with ADHD can often be very intelligent, yet they may find they struggle in school. They may have a hard time focusing on one subject for long periods of time. Or they may be bored and not feel challenged, so they have idle time to get in trouble and/or feel school is a waste of time. They may turn to drugs due to boredom or feeling a lack of control, seeking excitement. ADHD can manifest in many ways and should be explored with a professional.
Anonymous
February 20th, 2020 10:28pm
There are many struggles that people with ADHD face- Impulse control, aggressive behavior, hyper-activity, difficulty sitting still, periods of low motivation, difficulty paying attention for long periods of time, difficulty maintaining relationships, and difficulty calming down are some struggles that we can face. Myself and my son both have ADHD and although there are difficulties when it comes to coping with it, we learned to do it in a positive way. Learning positive coping skills is how we manage our ADHD on a daily basis. Some of our skills include: meditation, exercise, healthy diet, proper hygiene, and classical music! It takes time and a lot of patience but great rewards come from hard work!
Anonymous
March 6th, 2020 9:22pm
Being misdiagnosed. Lots of them face dependency cause they were given drugs at such a young age.
My 17 year old was told then he was 6 that he had ADHD but we never medicated him.
He is doing great. About to graduate and become a marine.
So why as soon as a child has a active imagination or an inability to listen does someone just toss pills at them?
I'm not on any and I was told I had ADHD.
You treat infection, and heartache you do not treat a personality.
That's what I think people with ADHD face on a daily basis.
well depending on the type it changes and it is different for everyone. I personally struggle with mixed type. I forget exactly what they all do but one type is primarily inactive and normally makes them unorganized and shuffle brained. the other type is primarily active and makes them hyper active. the last type mashes them together. I have mixed type so I'll talk about that. from what I've heard it can slow the part of your brain that lets ideas pass to your conscious mind. so you get a lot of ideas or thoughts. I don't know why it can make you hyper active but I feel an almost constant urge to move.
I would before medication have some problems in school. A.D.H.D is nothing to worry about. sometimes I lie and I don't know why. A.D.H.D can make people impulsive. some have problems making friends. some can be extreme with how they act. I'd say that about sums it up. asking multiple people with A.D.H.D can help you learn about it.
This is coming from who has ADHD, so this is my perspective on it. ADHD makes the world a very scary and challenging place. People with ADHD may experience things like lack of focus, easily distracted, hyperactivity, lack of organization, forgetfulness. People with ADHD may also experience things like impulsivity, irritability, aggression, and stubbornness. People with ADHD might also have anxiety and/or depression. Some people with Autism may also have ADHD. For me personally, it’s a struggle for me but you learn to adapt to your needs. It’s important to note that just because ADHD makes things harder, they don’t make them impossible!
As someone who wasn’t diagnosed with ADHD until they were 19, I didn’t realize that the way I thought or the path that lead me to thoughts/actions were different than everyone else. In school, I was chastised for being lazy when I couldn’t retain the information that I read in textbooks. I would get frustrated and experience a lot of anxiety because I could read a test question 30 times and still not understand what it was asking, because My brain would shift somewhere else faster than my eyes could move. I would have questions that would pop into my head that I related to the subject at hand even though others didn’t. If I didn’t have my questions answered right then, I would not be able to continue with a lesson because I would zone out and miss a large part of the lecture which would then confuse me when I got to homework and/or the next lesson. I have a hard time comprehending one-on-one conversations in higher stress situations, like job interviews, professional appointments, medical visits, etc. As a kid, I would get in trouble for not listening, but I didn’t know what I was told in the first place. While I was experiencing all of these things, I shamed myself a lot because I thought that I was the issue. I thought that I was not handling myself well and that it was my fault that I was doing these things and having these feelings. Not only did I not recognize these issues in myself, but my teachers, my parents, and other people in my life thought that what they were observing, (my actions and reactions because of these experiences), were character flaws and lack of intelligence and/or ambition. This inhibited my ability to connect with teachers, peers, and others. It also fueled my development of depression, anxiety, and eating disorders. I have now learned to give myself a little bit of grace and explain my situation to those who notice my differences. I have found that once people understand what is happening, they are a lot more patient and accepting. People with ADHD are not stupid, they are not a nuisance, they are not insensitive or lazy. Most of the time, they don’t realize that people don’t think the same way that they do. My way of thinking is different and can be annoying sometimes, but I wouldn’t want my brain to work any differently.
Anonymous
June 27th, 2020 7:31pm
Well it may vary from person to person. Obviously you have the main ones such as a short attentions span, hyperactivity, fidgeting and squirming etc. But it varies for every individual. Some may find they don't have some of the symptoms that others do, it depends on person to person. In my experience with it I tend to be quite impulsive, speaking without thinking or doing things without thinking them through first,I find tests extreme hard as I can't focus and my mind is just in a completely different place to where it should be. I also have to be doing something. It could be tapping the desk or walking or biting my sleeve, just anything. I can't stand still for long. Obviously this is just the things I have to deal with, or some of them, it will be different for everyone, so if you have any suspicions then it would be best to ask someone professional and trained in the area.
Anonymous
May 25th, 2021 3:25pm
I'll make it short
We tend to overthink a lot , we over process things inside our heads. Which makes people think that were slow or lazy but we're over working our heads over things. The outcome can be good because we think it over a lot and also can be a bad outcome because we're too slow to make a decision because of overthinking. We rarely get bored, we're very imaginative. We could be good writers they say but can be stubbornly lazy to write . We love to think a lot. We suffers from insomnia. We often get annoyed because we can't concentrate on things that we need to do
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