Friendship? Then the friendship ended, and I got no idea why.

@tryingtosurvive2024

Hello.. i understand and relate to this as well.. any relationship in this world is similar to what you've mentioned.. we can never know what's going on in someone else's mind.. so we can not make anyone stay if they don't wish to stay.. I'm glad you are here and reaching out with your issues and queries ☺️☺️ 

We may not be able to read someone's mind but yeah if someone wants to be with us then their actions will prove it.. i hope those 1% true people come into your life and stay forever!! ❤️ 

@dtanushree  Thank you I appreciate that.  😄

Hey ❤️ you can ask that person if you did anything on your end to cause the friendship to end, just for you. For you to know and move on but be better (if you really want to know)

but remember absolutely everyone is going through their own struggles and it can be hard to accept good things and keep up with good friendships. So many possibilities…

they might possibly think they don’t deserve a great friendship or they don’t deserve you period. Could be anything! So don’t blame yourself, it’s a hard world we live in especially mentally

@charleneivelisse  Thank you for this thoughtful reply.  I think It might be a little easier if I could replace people quicker.  Now days, when I loose someone, it can take me several years to replace them.  I go from having a friend to having no friend, and then it takes several years again.

Oh I’m the same way, you really care and that’s an amazing quality to have. You’re a faithful friend! I’ve learned to just work on myself as much as I can and the right people will fall right into my life

@charleneivelisse  It is good that you are working on yourself.  But I think we are all expected to work on ourselves.  Life is a journey.  You just keep moving forward.  

Are you too dependent so they feel trapped or stifled? That's a possibility

@WhatNameidk  They don't even let me get close enough to them for that to even happen.

@tryingtosurvive2024 I understand completely. Relationships can be so bizarre. Please don't blame yourself. There are so many people you can become friends with. Don't allow one relationship to harm others and most importantly yourself. It's ok if you feel upset or anxious too. I'm sending you a big virtual hug, friend :)

@WellsFiction  Thank you!  I can not remember the last time I got hugged in real life.  I grew up in a family that didn't hug, and there was a time when I that made me feel more manly.  But that is no longer me anymore.  If someone wants to hug me, I don't take it for granted at all!  Thank you so much for the virtual hug.  If you wish to pray for me, pray that God will open doors to places to where I can make real life friendships.  Because currently the only place I got any chance of making real life friendships is work.  At work I am a Janitor for a School.  That creates a problem because the other people are all teachers.  They have their own in group.  Once in a blue moon, a teacher will reach out to me, but it has always been very very very hard to maintain that sort of friendship.  They are busy busy busy busy, and yet they are not too busy for each other.  Just for me!  That makes my occupation a very bad place for me to make friends.

@tryingtosurvive2024 Absolutely friend. I am praying for you to find the support and friendship you need. It's so strange how people act like they must only be friends with certain people based on their job etc. You're on the right track tho. God will bless you. I can feel it. I have a really awesome friend who is a teacher, so don't give up on them just yet :)

It always happens with me too. People changes as time changes. You can't control other's behaviour. Let go of people instead of running behind them. Those who want to stay will stay. And if everyone leave, find happiness in solitude. That's what I do now. I am not useful for anyone in any way. I like to help people but I don't allow people to take advantage of my good behaviour so I am lonely too. I lucky to have good family though.

@plumSugar3000  I have my 2 parents and that is about it.  At work it hurts because just about everyone there is married!  Most are younger than I, now.

Why to compare?

@plumSugar3000  I can't help it.  I compare because it tells me where I am at in life.

Same here. And I am sad too. But I don't blame myself because of my illness. I am just trying to be happy in whatever I have.

@plumSugar3000  I don't think "trying" to be happy works.  Happiness is a feeling and it comes and goes.

Friendships are very hard to keep. In my experience as well. I tend to have a friend for a bit of time and I prefer minimal friendships but very close. But that has failed me so much that I sorta just have like a few not close "friends" and don't really have new ones. I've tried to but usually it requires so much on my part vs what the other person never puts in that I end up "testing" the friendship to see if its something I want by not communicating and it results in them never talking to me again because I'd have to initiate and they never initiate.

I fully get the frustration and maybe some self examining is needed by both yourself and me but I'd keep in mind that likely also they just weren't worth it in the end for you and you deserve better.

Also just really as adults friendships do sorta go whiles without communicating but the friendship is still there. Unless it's not. All you can do is focus on your side.

@SquishyPig  Last night I was talking to a listener, who told me that people only want what benefits them.  He said that now days people pick friends based on who they vibe with.  He might be right, but don't think it is the way things should be.  If all anyone does is pick someone because they vibe with them, then that friendship will be short lived.  Because nobody can vibe perfectly all the time.  I think there must be something much deeper to hold a friendship together.  People want all the glitter and sugar but none of the pain.  Problem is, life is not all glitter and sugar.  There needs to be a balance, and what surprises me is how nobody seems to be focused on what is good character.

I show up to work everyday, and I reliably do my best everyday.  Yet the administrators don't care about that. I am an honest person, and yet the administrators don't care about that.  I try to be kind and caring to everyone that will talk to me.  The administrators never notice until someone gets upset, and then the hammer falls.

Sameeee

Hey man look do not blame yourself it's not your fault. I am also going through same as you are. People leave and there is nothing no one can do about it . And i know the real problem is not that people leave but the question that why they leave or what have i done or is this how it's going to be forever. Look I also don't have the answer of these questions and to be honest there are no answers so don't waste your time looking for answers cause I have done it already. Moving on is hard especially when we are filled with this guilt that was i the reason for the end of this and the answer to that is no. I understand what are you going through. Honestly speaking I see a reflection of me in you and i want to help you so if you want to talk or wanna be a friend I AM HERE. Message me whenever you want to talk and remember one thing my friend IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.

@ghostp2928  I know that it is not intentionally my fault.  What I think is so weird is how a person can do all the right things for a long time, and as soon as the person does one little thing wrong, the other one will act like it was just so terrible that you messed up.  Whatever happened to "human's make mistakes?"

I’m going through the same thing. Last week everything was fine but now she’s ditched me for other people and completely ignores me at school. When I talk to her she doesn’t even look at me. Iv been racking my brains to find out if I did something wrong because I’m all alone at school again but I come up with nothing.

@ivorySquare6577  I remember when I was a student in school, people were flaky that way.

@tryingtosurvive2024

Probably because you're positive. They probably can't take that.