Thanksgiving Reminders
Trauma Community Check-in October 3rd
The Thanksgiving season is just about here. This can cause us to feel more stressed. Cooking and preparing food for guests and family. A time that is supposed to bring joy and connections with others a sense of joy. But for some of us, it is just the opposite.
Here are some things we can begin to focus on to help us move easily through the holiday season.
Be aware of your limitations.
Make your surroundings feel relaxing.
Plan ahead
Know that you can say no
Plan how much money you will spend.
Take breaks as you need to. Self-care is essential to your well-being.
Are you making plans for the holidays?
Are you cooking? Or going to eat out?
Thank you for being a part of the Trauma Forum
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@WorkingitThrough2 These are great reminders. I think a lot of times when it comes to holidays we mask and push through. Mean while we're freaking out inside.
@mytwistedsoul your so right. Where are you from? Why wouldn’t restaurants be open? It’s Xmas.
@TreaureSeekers3 Hey :) It's a pretty rural and I guess it's a pretty religious state. Even Walmart closes lol. Alot of stores and restaurants closed on Sundays too
@mytwistedsoul
I agree that all the restaurants will be closed here too. Thanks for your response😊
@mytwistedsoul
You are so right then we feel bad afterward😂
@WorkingitThrough2 I live in the UK, we don't celebrate thanksgiving here😞 but since I come from America, the chefs here at the carehome. Always prepare a special cooked dinner😁 for all the residents, and we give thanks to God for all our blessings😁 people at the care home are so kind to me, I get treated like a princess here ❤ what about you? Do you have plans?
@Tinywhisper11
I am supposed to get a surprise visit from my sister and niece. They plan to cook dinner for me to celebrate my 72nd. It was supposed to be a surprise😂LOL I found out. Not sure they will be able to come with our other loss.
@WorkingitThrough2 awww I'm sorry, I hope they can come and you can all have a good time ❤❤ and that's naughty, it was supposed to be a surprise!! It's ok, just act surprise if they can come ❤❤ when exactly is your big day? Oh wait! That's nosey and personal. Just forget I asked that. Gives you a giant tiny hug ❤❤
@WorkingitThrough2. I’ve been thinking about getting Chinese food on Thanksgiving. If I cook it will just be a drumstick for my partner.
@adventurousBranch3786 chinese food sounds nice😁❤ I've never had Chinese food I don't think.
@Tinywhisper11
Sounds good to me to😊
@Tinywhisper11. It’s yummy. I hope that you will get to try it someday.
@adventurousBranch3786 I love Chinese food! Do you have a favorite dish?
@mytwistedsoul. I like Chinese vegetables a lot. Especially chow me in and chop suey. Do you have a favorite?
@adventurousBranch3786 Lo mein and crab rangoon for sure. But the broccoli is awesome too. I might have too many favorites 😂
@adventurousBranch3786
I hear you. I don't do much cooking any more😊
Holidays or any gatherings are overwhelming. I find comfort in the warmth, smell and taste of mash potatoes, squash. Sweet Pots, stuffing, gravy, pie and coffee. The people part I struggle with and would rather isolate. I often regret the want or attempts to isolate.
I love the crisp air that this time of the year brings. It is like a slate has been wiped clean by the clean air and we start anew.
@straightforwardSkies7721
That sounds so good. and yes the fall weather does have away of refreshing the air.😊
I am so glad that you are here. How are you feeling over all?
I am struggling with some realization of how deep my past childhood trauma has impacted my adult life. Triggered by a traumatic situation that has happened over the last two weeks. I am surrounding myself with support including therapy. Working on meeting my basic human needs and seeing the light from the bottom up. Thank you for checking on me.
@straightforwardSkies7721 sorry to hear that. I understand. Everything you’re saying.
@straightforwardSkies7721
I am so glad that you have a good support system. Please take good care of yourself. Things that remind us of past traumas can really set us back a bit. You seem to have a good sense of what you need to do to get through this hard time, If you need more support please don't hesitate to ask,❤️
How are you doing?
@straightforwardSkies7721
Well tbh U am still awaiting my family to make arrangements for the loss of our sister last week. More frustrated than anything. Thanks for asking❤️
First- I'm so sorry for your loss. I can relate all too well unfortunately. So hard when we have to deal with the loss part on top of the planning and gathering piece. So many moving parts to contend with. I pray you have the strength, patience, guidance and understanding to navigate. Just know you have all of us as listening ears.
@straightforwardSkies7721
Thank you that means a lot❤️
This is the time of year I am grateful that I don't really have family. Family gatherings seem stressful and with a weird sense of obligation that I've never understood. Thanksgiving is also problematic for me because my heart goes out to the indigenous peoples here who are still struggling at the hands of our government. I've also never been allowed to celebrate thanksgiving or holidays.
So now some years, I like to try to reclaim it a little, in spirit for my dad who lives far away and for my Nana, who I'm sure would be happy I'm doing my best. Miss you, Nana. Usually my partner and I will have a big feast to ourselves and any friends who are alone that day. Though some years, it's just another day!
I find a limited tolerance before I need to leave the get together. I always like the ability to leave returning to my safe space if possible. That escape or plan b 😏 . I also like of the deviled eggs!! Yum
@straightforwardSkies7721 - I so relate to "limited tolerance" in gatherings. I'm going to save that phrase for future use hehe
@wontwakewontsleep
I resonate with a lot of the things you said.I am glad that you made your own way to celebrate what you want to remember. You have a good heart. I am glad that you plan ahead to have an escape plan😊
Have a wonderful day❤️
@WorkingitThrough2
Are you making plans for the holidays?....Yes, to be with and gather with my Family~
Are you cooking?.. Or going to eat out?....My mom does the Holiday cooking. And its a great thing because she's an amazing cook!
@PoliteOcean
Can you bring a guest😂LOL?
Well maybe I can come the next time😊. So glad your mom is a good cook.
@WorkingitThrough2
haha…sure thing!
*grants request for Thanksgiving invitation 😁
I will probably be having Thanksgiving dinner at my niece's house. Her husband does all the cooking, and unfortunately, I don't care for his cooking. It's too fancy. He adds weird stuff to everything he makes. The mashed potatoes don't taste like mashed potatoes, for example. I'm very fussy and picky about food, I know.
@WharfRat
I can truly relate to that. Sometimes people go overboard trying to get to fancy😂.I hope you can fix a little something at home in case you can't eat there😊. Enjoy the fellowship❤️
Basic warm yummy food is all I need. Although, sometimes weird combos of food have surprised me with how tasty they are. I think I grew up with a very basic palette and can appreciate your want for basic. Hope the holidays are relaxing and you find something tasty.
@WorkingitThrough2
So true - even though I love holidays they're also super stressful. And my cat passed away recently 💔💔💔, right after Halloween. I think I'm probably going to my partner's parents house for holidays again instead of having to cook myself though so that's good.
@ChaoticListener
I am so sorry to hear that you lost your cat. They are like children in the family. I am glad that you won't have to cook. Do you think you will get another cat later?
@WorkingitThrough2
Thank you! I have another cat already thank goodness but it still feels empty and lonely without the best cat in the world! Zelda would always just lay in your lap and purr and she legit used to comfort people when they were crying haha a little angel cat.
@ChaoticListener
Zelda really sounds like a very special cat. I know no other cat can replace the one you lost but I am glad you have another one❤️. My dog Max is old and I can tell his clock is winding down too and it is so heartbreaking.
In Canada, our Thanksgiving was last month in October. My parents are on vacation, so with just my brother and I, my Uncle and Aunt came over from another city to have lunch with us instead. Many western restaurants are closed on Thanksgiving, but Asian restaurants usually stay open (Chinese, Korean, Japanese).
If my parents were here, my mum might've cooked a family dinner, probably have chicken than turkey though. Or, they might've celebrated with their friends and still leave my brother and I on our own.
@Jaeteuk
I am glad that you had someone to celebrate with and thank you so much for being a part of this forum❤️