Losing my mind
saturdaysweaters
November 6th, 2018
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Im so sick of dealing with this. Every day of my life, I live on edge. Its been two years, and I still cant put it behind me. It just wont leave me alone. After two weeks of doing better, I had a flashback/dissociation episode today. I could barely move, just in a state of shock. They always leave me disoriented and exhausted. I just feel so heavy. A couple weeks ago, I struggled intensely with suicidal thoughts. I dont know if Id ever felt so hopeless besides in the midst of my trauma. I always feel like giving up whenever Im stressed now, its just hardwired inside of me. Ive been fighting for so long. Im so tired, and Im so afraid. I wish this could all be over. Just had to vent a little.