Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check in: Tuesday December 18th
Hey everyone! sprry the post is going up later than usual having major internet issues at the moment, I hope everyone is having an amazing Tuesday and if the week is being awful then if your a Christmas person just think to yourself there's only 1 week left to go now until it's Christmas, I personally am looking foward to it as it's my first one celebrating with my own 'new' family. Connecting with others is something that's difficult especially when it comes to people who have gone through trauma and I know it's hard but i also know it's different for everyone like I know I can't speak for everyone because I only know my experiences and I know sometimes an issue with connecting with people can be like a barrier between you them because they don't understand trauma and the reality is no one will ever truly understand it and that's ok it's how they deal with the knowledge and just use patience and try their best to help is what matters.
I know the post is a bit rambly but I felt after two weeks then I sorta need to do a post based off of a topic.
I love all of y'all so much, all of you are so amazing and strong and always remember your never truly alone 
@Avaray @BeeLeigh @KLM3278 @jr50 @Morfo66 @KatieMoon1 @Tamba @Jenna0903 @melliotm @inventiveOrange1 @HearingYourHeart @Lilyflower0817 @exuberantTriangle2562 @Ivorycat5573 @weareall1 @moonchild95 @AMusicalSilence @catsith @energeticPenny8 @Rebekahwriter13 @sensitiveShade5337 @singercrystalspirit @Ocendade @tenacity37 @Raveninthelabrynth @blissedNblessed @AriannaPink @sereneSoul23 @Zombii @Godborned @resourcefulPond1641 @Lilibuth12 @Tir @Halogen @Hoxenos @Christine1980 @Compassionatelistener108 @TheHoneyDoll @purpleWest8143 @silverIceCream21 @Bumblebee16 @archerzvy @Musicheals61 @placidFriend3007 @orchard9786 @Calmlake1999 @emotionalMaple9419 @MoreThanAConqueror18 @Redhawk6547 @Sk1ttles @Shayc1 @stella17 @blinkk @Equalnotabove @Compassion21 @lilblackcat89 @amiableSummer3420 @FangsInsanity @rissadawn @brokenflutterby @g00dwitch @No715 @SpruceRaven @tidyMoon3222 @dynamicHemlock1736 @Hope3729 @hardworkingStrawberries3477 @humorousBeing8966 @NancySV1 @spotthedot @courteousNorth5140 @ArianaMay @affectionateNorth4018 @FloweringBunny @loyalDrum2337 @InvaderStitch@redmark @CaringBrit @Ambrosia @practicalIdeal2007 @incompl @Forgive2Live @Ayla @RockClimber18 @rmickelpclr @ReallyRuth @friendlyLake5949 @hopetoday
Hello.
Its OK if you ramble a little, I do sometimes too. :-) Today, I had some positive things happen. Such as we had sunshine for the third day in a row which is pretty remarkable for this area, this time of year. And I even had a little unexpected time off in the middle of the day so I got to go for a short walk in the sun and sit by the water, even if it was frozen. :-) Also got to see a friends dog and a puppy they are fostering. Nothing like puppy therapy! I would like to have a dog but I do not so it was fun to hang with her dog. That does give one a boost sometimes.
today there is still a sense of sadness that is a bit pervasive or hanging over me a bit. I wish I could express what it was about but I dont seem to be able to. So it just stays inside. I dont know if thats better or worse than the way Ive been talking with things lately. Its hard to say. Anyways, it leaves you with a bit of a sense of loneliness but, its tolerable. At least for now. Which is better than it was in the past. See, now Im rambling too! ;) I do wish for the sadness to go away. Maybe tomorrow will be a little better. One never knows.
@pioneeringBanana1598
I don't think it's a bad thing if you feel like you could use a break from talking about things. Distractions can be a great tool, which it sounds like you've seen today (yay for puppies!!). I think as long as we don't try to push our feelings away forever. That's when things can start to build up and feel more intense. You've been doing a good job reaching out and talking about what's making you sad. So if it feels right to your body, enjoy the time off from thinking, and try not to judge yourself. I'm really glad to hear you had a good day. ❤
@pioneeringBanana1598
Hi there @pioneeringBanana1598!
How nice you went for a walk and enjoyed your friend's pet! Would go for that too myself! Those are nice things that can relly bring moments of joy 
Sorry for the sense of sadness, sometimes these negative emotions are difficult to put in words but they hit our senses and feelings. Glad to hear they are not too invasive and i really wish you today things are better.
Wish you also happy Christmas in case you will celebrate it, stay awesome!
@Softwhispers
Wow, celebrating with your own 'new' family!
Can you tell us a bit about this?
Thanks for acknowledging the difficulty and complexity in understanding others' trauma. This is so true, and this time is horribly difficult.
@emotionalMaple9419 well I got married the start of this year and had a daughter in September, so this year is just something completely new to me it feels like finally for the first time in years I'm settling down with my own family to celebrate
@Softwhispers
Oh how lovely!
You have had a very exciting and busy year being a new mum and partner.
Congratulations on your marriage and baby!
@Softwhispers
hey.
I have been , for a long time now, filling out the form to not be kept on the tag list....to unsubscribe.
It has just not stopped it from happening because I am still being tagged.
Can someone please remove my name from the list?
Thanks.
@blissedNblessed
@Kate @Hoxenos, can you help with this? ^^
@AmityLagniappe
Thanks for pinging me :)
@blissedNblessed
Hi there, I'm really sorry for the confusion! Our tag list on the dashboard is fully updated without your name so some people may not be using the updated one every time, I'm really sorry about this. I'll inform the team again to always check for the updated list. Thanks for sharing this with us!
@Hoxenos
Thank you. :)
Hello I am new to this support group. I have struggled with trauma associated with the loss of my dear mother every year during the my birthday at the end of November and Dec 9th the day she passed in 2002. She had ALS and had a sudden pulmonary embolism that took her within an hour she was gone. I am haunted every year by the last minutes I was with before the sudden incident. I still feel the huge ache in my heart that feels like it will never stop. I feel so helpless when I thinks of her at the end of a long day and I am reduced to tears. I already struggle with depression and anxiety and the trauma and the other two problems seem to feed each other. I was just made aware of EMDR therapy and understand it is the only therapy that has shown to be successful with curing trauma. I feel so alone and broken at 56. I really need some support to get through this terrible trouble I am having. I will be alone again this Christmas and I am in financial crisis and chronic pain due to a spinal pain condition. I feel so helpless and hopelessly alone. It is so hard to not give up and stay in bed every morning I should get up and go out into the freezing morning to take public transportation to my job. I really need help and feel broken from my mental health issues.
@bgdave
Hi dave, I'm really glad you decided to reach out and are here with us. I'm so sorry to hear about the traumatic loss of your mother. It sounds like you have a lot on your plate at the same time right now. I can understand why you would be feeling this way; it sounds completely natural under the circumstances. I hope you will continue to hang out here with us as you work through these complicated emotions. You're not alone in your struggles. ❤
@AmityLagniappe ❤️ Thank you for your kindness and taking the time to put it out there for me.
@bgdave
Welcome!
@SentientiaPoecile ❤️ Thank you for the warm welcome bless you for your kindness.
@bgdave
Hello. Its good to have you here with us. I am so sorry for all the hard times you are going through. I think that I can definitely relate to some of the feelings youre describing. Trauma, anxiety and depression is a terrible combination. I live with that too. Youre doing so good getting through each day. You can do it. Youre not alone here with us. Were glad youre here and we care about you. Sending safe hugs if OK.
@pioneeringBanana1598 ❤️ Thank you for your kindness and understanding. I really appreciate your reaching out to me in my time of need. I feel so lost and broken. I need to find my way back to a more normal life whatever that looks like. I really hope that I can find the strength and find my way back to feeling happy and healthy and accepted and needed. Glad I found the trauma forum I know I am not alone. Bless you with your own personal struggle.
@bgdave
Hi @bgdave, i am really sorry to hear all the sad things you had to face. Sometimes life can be very challenging. You mentioned EMDR as therapy to help trauma, I've heard it is very useful but suppose it requires time and constancy too, although i think any way to help you can be good. I hope you can feel less alone here with the friendly community of 7 cups, we are here for you too!
Wish that you may feel a bit better physically so that you may help the emotional state by doing something nice like a walk or anything you may enjoy. Please take care for yourself
@Softwhispers
Anymore, I'm not sure i even care all that much if others understand my trauma or try to help with it. I'd really just like it if they not add to it. Lol. 😑 Are there really people in the world who actually respect boundaries?
@SentientiaPoecile
Hi @SentientiaPoecile!
I understand that sometimes interaction needs to be a good match in order to be positive, mostly when support is needed.
I hope you will not give up in searching for the right listener for you and that the community can let you feel the care you deserve too!
@BeyondTheInvisible
Thank you. I do feel very supported here. I keep praying that I can eventually find people offline who are anything like the people here. I think people like me are probably also hiding in their own houses avoiding people. :)
Just when I think I'm having a good, no drama or reoccurring trauma. I start having nightmares again. Sighs.
@Rebekahwriter13
Hi @Rebekahwriter13, sorry to read about the nightmares you are having. I understand they impact emotionally but I hope you have a good support system to help you with it, beside the care and support we can offer you here in 7 cups of tea.
Best wishes and take care!
@BeyondTheInvisible
Half of my family helps, but nightmare was about the other half of my family
@Rebekahwriter13
Hi, I hope step by step things can go a bit better with the right support of those who care!
@Rebekahwriter13
These kinds of things happen to me sometimes too, and I wonder if it's the brain's way of trying to peel back another layer of healing (revisiting with fresh eyes). Especially with holidays approaching. Nice of our brains to never let us get any rest, isn't it?! :) Try to be as gentle as you can with yourself. Remember that your feelings about your family are valid, and it's a real and difficult issue. *hugs*
I have been standing up for myself for the last few months and not backing down on something very important to me which involves my self respect. This is really hard for me because of all the trauma of my childhood and past. I've been successful which I can hardly believe so I'm really proud of myself, but it's such a lonely place to be coz I'm totally alone in this, it's taken all my energy and I feel so stressed about it all. I'm exhausted from all the months of fighting , I'm trying to be positive but just feel like crying.
@hopetoday
Hello @hopetoday, I understand it is something difficult to deal with but hey... you can be proud of all your effort and all that you achieved by your own! Keeps on going, you are on the right path to move forward, hugs!
@BeyondTheInvisible Thank you for your support :)
@hopetoday
It can be very difficult to maintain healthy boundaries with others, especially if boundaries are new to the relationship. I'm super proud of you for working at it for so long. Your self-respect is so important, and it sounds like this issue is really worth it for you. I think boundaries can get easier with time, when the same people start to realize that this is a value for you and that they're not going to be able to make you budge on it. You're doing great. Keep doing what is right for you.
@AmityLagniappe Thank you it's so good to feel supported! :)
