Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check-in Sunday, 18 February 2018
Good morning everyone!
What a joy it is to be back and getting into the swing of things. As I was out unexpectedly caring for family members, I found myself acutely aware of a feeling that could be described as loss or simply an emptiness. As I watched the medical teams moving quickly and elegantly around my father earlier this month; and my mother, a few days ago, I realized how beautifully everyone worked together. It was like watching a carefully choreographed community working in tandem to provide individualized, compassionate and experiencial knowledge to offer the patients a chance to heal. Everywhere I looked I saw groups of family, friends and even strangers coming together to provide one another support.
I realized at that moment what a integral part of my life this community has become. The unconditional support, the compassion, the validation and experiencial knowledge courageously shared to benefit another. To let them know that nobody should go through this alone. This is our space and everyone can be pround of their contribution to this wonderful community.
It you would like to share something that you find comfort in please feel free to share. If not, please pop in and say hello. Let us know. how you are feeling today. I would love to hear from you 
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@Compassionatelistener108
Hi comp.. glad to see u back.. Hoping you are well
I found a little peace yesterday being with my residents and getting them to laugh by inadverdantly saying something that was quite ironic, but managed to get them laughing so very hard and gave me a lot of joy..
Today however i have been stuck in difficult flashbacks and body memories as such taking that feeling of peace and safety away. I think i might be apprehensive about new appointment on thursday, and feeling guilty for speaking out more..
Anyway enough negativity on my behalf.. Hope everyone is well.. Sending love to all
@calmLake1999 Hej hon, I'm glad you had a good day yesterday. 
Sorry today wasn't as grand but there's always tomorrow.
@calmLake1999
Hi Calm,
I am very grateful to be back in the community again. I missed everyone here a great deal. I am sorry you are having trouble with flashbacks and staying grounded right now. You never have to apologize for being honest here, Calm. We all have challenges and need a little extra support as we are healing.
Many safe hugs 💛
@Compassionatelistener108
Thank you comp... I think im struggling with them more intensely the last week and a bit, because of apprehension but also with because i have started to be more open then i have ever been, i am breaking the silence and whilst it is scary it is also a needed step..
We are glad to have you back.. You have been much missed
@Compassionatelistener108
Morning!
@sensitiveShade5337
Hi Shade! I am happy to see you zooming about again. I missed you.
@Compassionatelistener108
tryna be less here as much as I can but it's still good to see familiar faces
Yesterday was my birthday, and I didn't do anything. I'VE been a little emotional about it. I get nervous that I'll have a panic attack in public again. Last time I was paralyzed from it. It feels safer at home.
I find comfort with my cat. Always right by my side showing me love.
@Djs3 Sorry anxiety talked you out of your day, it happens to just about alle of us here at some point. Hugs.
It's great you have a cat to help you relax. I have two myself, but they're a mite wild lol.
Keep your chin up hon, let us know if theres anything we can do for you.
Loneliness is crushing, it's being and feeling together makes us strong.
Glad to hear your experience.
Hope your parents are recovering well :)
@MayaCarino Hi Maya, I hope alle is well for you today.
@MayaCarino
Thank you very much for those words of wisdom. I do try to take on too much at times. Especially if it concerns family.
You quote is spot on. I will keep a copy in a very prominent place.
My Dad is doing remarkably well and Mom is trying her best to get the doctors to let her go. She is honestly doing remarkably well under the circumstances. Life has been very kind to my family.
@Compassionatelistener108
hugz
@RumpleSteeleSkin
Rumple! It is so good to see you. I will accept hugs anytime. Looking forward to seeing you Friday during the event.
Hugs to you 💛
@Compassionatelistener108
woohooo for sure Im doing 1 trauma discussion and 3 mindfulness skills and scenerios on bullying
Sooooo, because Im a female, I am currently dealing with a lot of pain that should be gone in a day or so, Im completely exhausted for no good reason, and I just accidentally took a nap in the middle of the day while Ive got plenty of homework I need to get done today. Lucky for me though, I just jumped wide awake with a pounding heart because even asleep I could somehow feel what I guess was interpreted as me being held down. It was me. My left wrist had crossed over my right wrist above my head. I just scared myself awake. I still basically feel like death though so thats fun! 🙃🤦🏼♀️
But its okay! I have brookies to keep me company! 😜🙃
@BeeLeigh Homework always goes better after a nap.
Had ye done it instead of napping half your brain would have been DOOMED!
lol Hugs Bee
@Raveninthelabrynth
OMG I
@BeeLeigh My brain keeps bubbling like that lately too.
@Raveninthelabrynth
I am so over this. I don
@BeeLeigh Hugs Bee.
@Raveninthelabrynth
Thank you, hugs are always appreciated. Of the virtual variety, not always in person 😜. I did get my paper done and submitted before the deadline. I feel like it was pretty rambly but I was just going for full word count at that point so I
@BeeLeigh Well Done!
I feel Doomed with Scoil. Totally bubbled an messed up my Sociology exam, and I have an exam in psyche of sex and gender and abnormal psyche this week. I hate exams.
I'm getting better at whipping out papers ( in all English ;) ) lol I love scoil, I hate exams, I get stressed an bubble.
@Raveninthelabrynth
Nah, you
@BeeLeigh Yer Right!!! I got me some Jelley Beans 
hey everyone. i dont know how to feel.... i saw my abuser again and i am just so frustrated
@dynamicHemlock1736 Sorry to hear this happened Hemlock. I know that situation well. Just breathe and know you got out of there well.
Let us know if there is anything we can help you with.
@Raveninthelabrynth actually there is one thing I could need some help with. I dont know if you can help me with that and If not I can totally understand <3 but I am kind of wondering, how can I love again after I experienced an abusive relationship in the past? I feel like it holds me and that I cant let go. There is someone I found and I trust and I dont want to ruin this because of what happened in my past. I dont know If i am capable of loving ever again.
@dynamicHemlock1736
Oh Hemlock, yes you are capable of love! The fact you
@dynamicHemlock1736 it takes alot of paitnce, honesty, and work between you and your partner, but this just takes work and time. Start with not saying never. When you are ready you will go there. It doesn't always go well (hence needing patience) but in time you will work thigs out fine. Just keep very mindful that the one you are with is not the one whom abused you.
I feel a lone, but I did get some writing done.
@Rebekahwriter13
Hi Rebekah,
Feeling alone is challenging. I am sorry you are having these emotions. I am happy you were able to write as your work is beautiful. I know I have mentioned it to you before as your posts have been amazing.
Do you know why these feelings have been strong lately? I ask as I want to check back with you to see what types of things may feel supportive.
I hope you will be able to write some today as well. In the interim, please know I am thinking of you. I hope these feelings will subside. I know I am not the only person you have inspired with your talent.
Safe hugs 💛🌻
@Compassionatelistener108
I'm thinking I have strong feelings of loneliness because after my ex died all of his friends, which I thoughts were my friends, decided to pretty much ghost me. Im not sure if i remind them of him, or if they were just his friends.
All my friends are online, mostly on this site. I need to socialize and get out. However I feel since I got my depression, anxiety, and ptsd that is been very hard to make and keep friends.
My depression makes my loneliness worst.
I'm planning to make dinner and work on my writing.
@Rebekahwriter13
Firstly, I am very sorry for your loss. I cannot begin to imagine how you must be feeling. I know I can support you in the most compassionate way possible.
As far as your mutual friends, it is painful when people decide to take a step back. It could be a number of things as everyone grieves differently. Sometimes people simply dont know how to help or what to say. It is not fair nor does it feel loving when people disappear. It may very well be their grieving process and I do hope the friendships that were meaningful will return with time.
Please remember that you are doing your very best. Depression is difficult for people to understand unless they have felt it or been very close to someone going through it. It requires small steps and a gentle reminder to yourself that you are doing your best and will continue to work within your ability to spend time with others.
Right now it is time to focus on taking such good care of yourself. The rest will follow 💛