Traumatic Experiences Community Daily Check In - Monday April 10th 2018
Happy Tuesday Everyone,
This morning I would like to focus on Mindfulness. By bringing mindfulness to a situation Im focusing on the here and now. It's a way to put a skilful twist on your negative thoughts.
Ive found that DBT has helped tremendously through my battles with trauma. Im reading a book which covers Mindfulness. I found this passage and thought this is why I meditate. In Mindful Magazine they wrote, Mindfulness helps us put some space between ourselves and our reactions, breaking down our conditioned responses.
While mindfulness is something we all naturally possess, its more readily available to us when we practice on a daily basis.
Whenever you bring awareness to what youre directly experiencing via your senses, or to your state of mind via your thoughts and emotions, youre being mindful. And theres growing research showing that when you train your brain to be mindful, youre actually remodeling the physical structure of your brain.
I love how the book Stronger Than BPD the girls guide to taking control of intense emotions drama & chaos using DBT. I love how the book sticks to the idea that you need to be more mindful and skilful of your actions.You are then able to skillfully choose the best outcome to reach your ultimate goal.
How do you skillfully manage your emotions?
What are ways you have learned to cope with mindfulness?
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@SoftForestHSP77
I have done a lot of DBT in the past and mindfulness was always one of the skills I struggled with most. I always found especially with meditative exercises to help quiet my mind and focus on the moment often created more anxiety because it increased certain awareness of things I was actively trying to avoid thinking about by either multi tasking, keeping non stop busy or using unhealthy coping mechanisms like my eating disorder. Recently I had someone re frame this concept for me in a way I understand much better and has helped me cope much more with my anxiety and fear. It was suggested I try to look at my past as if it was just a bad movie. Also I could try to pretend to have complete amnesia and in doing so ask myself in this moment if there really was anything to be scared of or any real immediate threat or danger. I've found this has taken practice but when I do this I'm finding often it can help ground me and lower the distress I feel when I'm starting to panic.
Thanks for the post. This is a wonderful topic to wake up to and start my day- I will look into ways to incorporate mindfulness as I go about my day. As for me, I am often numb emotionally so finding ways to break through numbness and actually experience the living of life has been a challenge. Small incremental steps and experiences are helping me gain confidence and meaning.
@emotionalMaple9419
I'm glade your able to take baby steps towards feeling better. Thats what its all about.
Just keep trying to learn healthy ways to cope. :)
@SoftForestHSP77
Thanks so much for the encouragement.
I am always open to learning new ways of coping if anyone wants to share
what's working for them, I'd love to hear.
@SoftForestHSP77
Hiii
I havent seen you for a long long time, where have you been?
I practice minfulness when i go to sleep mostly but also when i eat sometimes. I have learnt from the mindfulness community to be aware of the food I eat, the colours the smells the tastes and sometimes it feels so good!
@sensitiveShade5337
I've been around. Trying to cope with life the best way I can. :)
I'm glade your using mindfuleness. Its very helpful. At the moment this book on mindfulness has me intruiged. I just cant put it down. Then I'm going back and re reading it to try and understanmd fully what mindfuleness is really about.
@SoftForestHSP77
yay of trying to cope, i know how hard it can be sometimes..
It took me also long time to understand what mindfulness is about
@sensitiveShade5337
Yeah It can be confusing. There are so many different parts to it. :) But I'm relearning it. Brush ups are always great!
@SoftForestHSP77
What are brush ups? still learning vocabulary over here lol
@sensitiveShade5337
I just mean reading about DBT and CBT. Trying to relearn skills. :)
@SoftForestHSP77
oh i was actually looking t do CBT as i have learnt that it could help but i have no clue where should i do that, like do i talk to my current therapist about it, do i go to my psychiatrist or do i go to the hospital? I just have no clue and I'm not sure if i do need to go through it
@sensitiveShade5337
I'd start by talking to your therapist. I would go to the Libray and pick out a CBT or DBT workbook. and start reading. This will better help you understand what CBT is.
CBT Definition: Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is a type of psychotherapeutic treatment that helps patients understand the thoughts and feelings that influence behaviors. CBT is commonly used to treat a wide range of disorders, including phobias, addictions, depression, and anxiety.
Just start studying it like crazy!!! Learn every thing you can. Ask your therapist if there is a CBT group you can go to .. or DBT....they both help trumendously.
hey <3
i practise mindfulness for grounding when i feel anxious or panicked, or often even if i had a busy day and want to relax :)
wish everyone a great day!
@SoftForestHSP77
How do you skillfully manage your emotions?
Today was fine went with intusion
What are ways you have learned to cope with mindfulness?
hmm
idk I go by flow...
@conscientiousPineapple1782
I like to mindfully distract myself. I've found it to be the most effective way. I write up a list of things I enjoy doing such as writing, watching Therapist Kati Morton on Youtube, or I do something that relaxs me like drinking coffee during therapy helps me cope with the situations we are talking about.
@SoftForestHSP777
I like drawing
lately to tired for enything...
Yesterday, I thought I'd be brave and tell my therapist something I've never told anymore before. Wow. What a mistake. Speaking about it doesn't make me feel better. I feel dirty and I feel like I should die. I'm so sorry I said anything. I'm a really bad person.
I really want to take it all back. I wish I never spoke.
Checking in today.
8:00 Pm 4/10/2018
I often blame my self for the trauma i go through. On a real level i feel that I did cause some of the trauma my self (self inflicted). Some of the experiences that were traumatic were not my fault. On the other hand I can learn from every experience. The traumatic events do not need to define or label me. Today i am grateful for all of the experiences i have had and I now know how to treat my self better.
Some of the events i blame my self for were not my fault. I can make healthy life choices everyday and i can make the decision to walk away from any thing or person i please to. especially when i feel uncomfortable. being able to just say "NO" is a big step in the right dirrection. I can say "NO" to my self too. I can choose to have a good day and fight for my happieness today or i can let the tides of change over whelm me. Regaurdless the tides of change will be a challange. Being able to say "NO' when ever i feel is most oppertune can help and prevent other from hurting me even more. I don't have to put my self in a comprimising situation any more then i have to. why would i continue to hurt my self if i know it is no good for me? I can learn from my past. I can be who ever i want to be.
My experiences do not have to define me, my life, or my friends. Not even my own mother has the right to define me as an addict or some other terrible work or slang term. Today in my two concurrent years of sobriety, Two years after my father passed away, and two years later I can finally do what I think it right. I can finally present my self the way i want to be seen; I can show others how to live right by showing them with my actions. I have my whole life ahead of me i can be who i want to be even if i am fully dissabled. For that I am grateful.
I am grateful because i can lean and think in my own special ways. I can see a diffrent sid or the puzzle of life. I am gratefull because i can help and advocate for the ones who need it most; the ones who can't or dont have the social skills to. i can help other learn how to set boundries and stand up for them selves. Even if they dont feel like it will acomplish anything. I am responcible for anybody who reaches out for help. I am grateful
Thanks,
ESOSynthinikin2124
@ESOSYNTHIK2124 Wow.. you sound like a focused person when you wrote that, I like that you have/want all the experiences of your life to make up you. The bad things are important to making you as the good things. [In my head me saying the next bit is wrong] It would be perhaps better or more helpful not to assign labels like this is bad... or. not sure... I think I am trying to say do not assign vaule judgements because if you not happy one day then you might devalue that day. There is vaule in having a bad day I guess [not sure I am making sense so yep..] Well done on two years *hugs*
@AmalieAnne
I understand what you are say. :) There is value in everyday. :)
@SoftForestHSP77 yes ma'am
@AmalieAnne Thank you so much for your feed back. I was having a rough one today and this helped revive my day just that much more. i really do apreciate that. I havet been here to look at the fourm in a while! it was sooo great to hear such wonderful responces :)
@ESOSYNTHIK2124 I will give you a hug but only if that is ok with you so... ***Huggles***
@AmalieAnne
*hugs* thanks you <3
@ESOSYNTHIK2124
I think thats awsome that your becoming an advocate for Mental Health. I too am doing the same. Helping others with the same issues is a great way to Boost your self Esteem and help those who are struggling to be here. For me thats the whole reason I come on to 7 cups. :) I hope your a Listener. Its very satisfing and can bring closure to issues you didnt even realize you have. :) I'm so glade your here and had the time to write. The more people we can help cope the better!
@SoftForestHSP77 Thank you so much; your words means alot to me. I have found if sombody is not ready for help you can not force it apon them. I have had others force there help apon me, I didnt like it. I think the first step is determining the kind of help they are avalible for. When worst comes to worst. In my experience being a voice of reason has served me well and will alway have great and superior aplications.