Day 2: Setting Positive Intentions: Let's Set Some Together!

I have BPD, so one thing I'm working on trying to let go of or need less of, is constant validation .

@KaliWolfie Thank you for sharing your intention of letting go the need of constant validation, Kali. Wanting validation is very human, and it is nice to reflect on how to meet that need in healthy ways. What feelings come up for you as you work on needing less constant validation? We are all here with you in supporting you practice this intention. 

@ASilentObserver 

I will live my life with awareness of the consequences of my speech and actions in order to avoid hurting anyone.

I will look for and take advantage of opportunities to be of service and to benefit others as I go through my day. 

@soulsings Thank you for sharing your thoughts on living with awareness and looking for opportunities to help others. You are committed to treating people with care through your words and actions. We are blessed to have your presence and support in the community. You inspire us everyday <3

This is such a great thread about setting positive intentions! I like what you have written Obs about it not being about wishful thinking.

I can sometimes set really high expectations of myself that are unrealistic and sometimes I need to let things be and unfold naturally. This is a good reminder to check in with myself and what is no longer positively serving me.

@LisaMeighanMScGMBPsS Thank you Lisa. It is understandable setting high expectations can sometimes be challenging. Unfolding naturally as a good reminder. It may help to be gentle with oneself as one learn. 

@ASilentObserver

Thank you for this helpful post!

If you can let go of a habit or behavior that no longer serves you and your highest good, then what will it be?

I am working on to accept that life is not always fair and accepting how things are gives freedom. 

@amiablePeace77 I agree with you Ami. Accepting what we cannot change can be challenging but also freeing. I appreciate your awareness and motivation to focus on inner growth.  Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

@ASilentObserver

If you can let go of a habit or behavior that no longer serves you and your highest good, then what will it be?

If I can let go of a habit or behaviour that no longer serves me and my highest good, then it will be eating and drinking less mindfully and then take that positive energy that comes from it into everything else I do.

@communicativePond1728 Thank you for sharing your intentions with us Pond. It seems focusing more on mindful eating and drinking would serve you well. You clearly want what is best for your highest good, and small shifts sometimes make the biggest difference. If I can ask, how this positive change could enhance other areas of your life?

@ASilentObserver

I think if I eat and drink more mindfully, I'll recieve many benefits in other areas!

It might improve my health, and patience.

And maybe if I'm mindful in one thing, I'll be more mindful in all the others...because isn't how we do something is how we do anything?

@ASilentObserver

If you can let go of a habit or behavior that no longer serves you and your highest good, then what will it be?

One habit/behaviour I can let go of is excessive worrying & channel that energy into healthier self care & more positive thinking. It doesn't serve me or my higher good to waste energy to excessively worry.

@CaringSub It is understandable excessive worrying has been taking a lot of your energy. It can be really draining. Refocusing that energy into more positive self-care and thinking seems like a good approach and I hope it serve you better. What aspects of positive self-care have you found most helpful so far, even if a bit? 

@ASilentObserver

What self care I have found that helps, when I recognize I am worrying too much is,  breathing exercises & brief meditation. I use it to help interrupt the worrying, try to reset & think more clear/positive. 

@CaringSub Those self care practices of breathing exercises and brief meditation sound helpful for interrupting worries and resetting your mindset. I am glad you have found strategies that work well for your needs.

@ASilentObserver Is there a tag list for this series?

@cloudySummer there is a taglist for the Therapy Community which is offering this serioes. 

You can sign up here   https://www.7cups.com/forum/therapy/AnnouncementsandUpdates_2176/JoinTheTaglistgetalertssoyoudonotmissanythinginTherapySubcom_269989/

Thank you for your interest

soulsings 

Community Mentor Leader Therapy Community

@soulsings Mmh, thanks. I don't want to get all messages for this community, though. I'll check back now and then instead.

@soulsings Thank you Soul for the help <3 and great question, Summer 

If I were to let go of a habit or behavior it would be my increasing cynicism. Being skewed towards negative thinking, immediately thinking others as self-centered instead of genuinely kind when they offer to help you, etc. It's something that's just more of a bother to my well-being instead of being a means of self-protection. It's not something to easily let go of, though. 

@cafedaydreams I hear you. I think most of us have had people promise to help us but they had a selfish intention.  On 7 Cups I find that there is less room for that to happen so I can trust people more on 7 Cups than I may be inclined to in real life. 

@cafedaydreams Thank you for sharing your thoughts, Cafe. I hear you that how it can be challenging to let go of habits that have become ingrained. You are aware that constantly expecting the worst in others is more draining than protective. Maintaining hopes while also protecting yourself takes strength and awareness. I'm glad you recognize the impact on your well-being and are considering what brings you more peace. How does focusing on cynicism tend to make you feel?

@ASilentObserver I am trying to work on being kinder to myself and not talking to myself in a negative way. It's a big challenge for me. I think it will take time and me being patient to work on this.

@Taylorz27 that is a great idea. 

@soulsings Thank you 

@Taylorz27 Thank you for sharing about your goal of being kinder to yourself, Taylor. It can be challenging to change patterns of self-talk, but making an effort to be patient and compassionate is admirable. Small steps towards kindness are still steps forward. We are all here rooting for you as you take these small steps <3

@ASilentObserver Thank you it's very hard but I want to start being more kinder to myself.

@ASilentObserver
If you can let go of a habit or behavior that no longer serves you and your highest good, then what will it be?

Procrastination, most definitely.

@KateDoskocilova I hear you Kate 💜It sounds like procrastination can be distracting. Reflecting on habits can help gain clarity. It is good that you have the self-awareness to identify what's important to change. 

@LemonLilly That is amazing, Lilly. It sounds like focusing on your own mental health and letting go of trying to fix your adult kids' problems when they don't want help could be beneficial. What feelings come up for you around setting that boundary? I am glad you taking steps to caring for yourself in a positive way.

@LemonLilly I hear you and I am sorry that you are in an amazingly difficult position. Self harm is very harming not only to the body but it creates a habit of inflicting pain. Some people I know get on the blame game and start feeling they deserved to be punished. I hope you find ways to cope with that behavior and get your daughter to choose help over habit. 

@ASilentObserver

If you can let go of a habit or behavior that no longer serves you and your highest good, then what will it be?

One habit/behaviour I can let go of is distractions, I am currently struggling with focused working hours and due to that my time management skills are off, that leads to anxiety and work stress 😔😔

@lovingApple5323 Thank you for sharing what you're experiencing. It can be challenging to manage distractions and feel anxious when our time isn't as focused as we'd like. What thoughts come up for you around improving your focus over time? I am glad you are self-aware about how certain habits have been impacting you.

@ASilentObserver

Mostly I feel need to talk to someone, I enter on to this website and connect with listeners, just to realise that I was repeating myself and the problems and playing a victim card.It was helpful for one or two instances but later it wasn't going anywhere as I was not able to detach my worries and move on. 

So handle this I am planning some phone free hours with focused timings to get work done and move away from self pity :)

If you have some suggestions please share 

@lovingApple5323 I agree phone free time is important and also TV and radio and other distractions. The mind is equipped to do one thing at a time. 

@ASilentObserver 

Thanks