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Building Self-esteem: Uplifting Others

Hope February 13th

Hey everyone! It is time for a new post in our Building Self-esteem series. Can you believe it is already week 6? Continuing our exploration of self-esteem, let's dive into a secret weapon often overlooked: uplifting others. 

Why the positive feedback loop?

Think about it: when you make someone's day with a genuine compliment, a helping hand, or simply a listening ear, it creates a ripple effect. You witness the impact of your actions, reaffirming your own value and capabilities. It's like looking in a mirror reflecting kindness back at you.

But how do I start "uplifting" in real life?

The beauty lies in everyday moments:

  • Compliment a classmate on their unique style or insightful comment. A little validation goes a long way! It needs to be genuine though!
  • Volunteer your time for a cause you care about. Witnessing the positive change you contribute to strengthens your sense of purpose.
  • Offer genuine support to a friend facing a challenge. Being there for someone reinforces your inner strength and empathy. It helps you find purpose
  • Pay attention to small gestures. Holding the door open, offering a helping hand with groceries, or simply leaving a positive note – these micro-actions pack a punch.
  • Remember, it's all about aligning your actions with your core values. What truly matters to you? Helping animals? Advocating for social justice? Protecting the environment? Find opportunities to uplift others in ways that connect to your passions. This authenticity further amplifies the self-esteem boost. 


Building self-esteem on 7 Cups

7 Cups is also a great platform to help uplift others. Some ways you can do this on 7 Cups is:

  • Taking the time to listen to someone’s story in a group setting
  • Going to the needs reply queue and answering posts that resonate with you. 
  • Providing active listening support to a member as a listener
  • Creating a forum post on a cause that matters to you and engaging with the people who comment. 
  • Taking on a leadership role that aligns with your passion and values. 

Volunteering: The ultimate confidence superpower?

Studies show that volunteering significantly increases self-esteem and life satisfaction. Immersing yourself in a cause bigger than yourself cultivates a sense of purpose, belonging, and mastery. Plus, the skills you gain and the connections you make can open doors to future opportunities.

Bonus Tip!

If you are unsure what activity/services suit you best, then the core values exercise we did in the past can be of help. Look through the values you deem as most important and try and find activities that help you practice that value. If you can’t, then move to the important values. 

Task of the week

For the next 7 days (preferably more) every day when you wake up, start your day with the intention that you will intend to do at least one good today. Look for that opportunity throughout the day. It can look like:

  • Baking cookies for your family
  • Donating to a charity of choice
  • Giving a ride home to your friend/co-worker
  • Helping someone with their groceries. 

I am confident that most of us already do good on 7 Cups so that is why you are encouraged to find opportunities offline for this specific activity. 

Do your act of kindness/service for today and share with us how it made you feel. (You can choose to keep the act hidden or share it). 

Please note this is a required activity if you are working towards the braving self badge. You will be asked what activity you did for 7 days that was focused outwards. 

Attention! Next week our post will focus on learning from others' experiences. If you wish to share your own experience and tips on how to build self-esteem in terms of what worked for you, please reach out to me asap so you can be featured in the post. 



This post is part of the Building Self-esteem series! You can find all the posts of the series linked here. 

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Hope OP February 13th

Tagging everyone who signed up to be tagged. 

@Proudme @YourCaringConfidant @SleepyPersonForever @Aputik @Suen00 @exuberantBlackberry9105 @koko263 @LoveMyMoonflowers @theboymoana @gettingbettertoday @KateDoskocilova @mytwistedsoul @Ania @Kristynsmama @tidyHickory3283 @orangish @Zeraphim @pandanfe @Wayward7Good7Intentions @Fuechsin @proudme @Clarisse29 @Rui00 @communicativePond1728 @cautiousVixen @HealingGriz @keeperofhearts @CordialDancer @NaomiF08 @unassumingEyes @SmartCat007@randomperson1010 @Bubbles0909 @bravelion5342 @WeEarth @PrincessAz17 @Maggie032021 @Unknowncloud4321 @fuzzyclamp @communicativePond1728

Zeraphim February 13th

Is it a requirement to do the good things offline? I'm on disability. The people I live with are not safe to interact with beyond surface level interaction to get by. I can't get myself to the grocery despite needing to for like a month. Online is basically all I can do...

1 reply
Kristynsmama February 13th

it doesn’t matter how big your act is or whether it’s offline or online. And it can even be something simple in your home that is surface level. Maybe you offer to do the dishes, or take out the trash. Or maybe you just do it without saying anything that way the people who aren’t safe for deeper conversations can’t really hurt you. The point of doing a random act of kindness is to do something kind for someone else expecting nothing in return. While this challenge is specifically offline, I’m sure that Hope would understand your reasons for doing something kind for someone else online instead of offline.

1 reply
Hope OP February 15th

@Kristynsmama

Absolutely! Anyone who is not able to do it offline can do it online. 

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Zeraphim February 13th

I helped my partner who is stressed today from a deadline by asking what I could do to help and getting them soothing music, giving them comforting words, strategizing how they'll manage their tasks little bits at a time, and validating their struggle and giving feedback when asked about if they've written their message for their assignment clearly.

2 replies
Hope OP February 15th

@Zeraphim

This is a great way of uplifting others by offering what they need. 

Kristynsmama February 15th

@Zeraphim

This is a wonderful way to be of service to someone you care about.  I bet they felt like their load was a lighter because they had your support!

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WeEarth February 13th

@Hope

Today, I took the initiative to support my juniors with their academic doubts.

4 replies
Hope OP February 15th

@WeEarth

I hope that went well

1 reply
WeEarth February 15th

@Hope

goma-cat-nod.gif

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Kristynsmama February 15th

@WeEarth

i bet they really appreciated your support too!

1 reply
WeEarth February 15th

@Kristynsmama

Yes, Kristy they are kind, supportive and compassionate just like you all 💓

yay-love.gif

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Kristynsmama February 13th

@Hope

I like to call random acts of kindness RAK’s. And they have literally been life changing for me. This post is really in alignment with who I already am. I am getting ready to start volunteering at my local children’s hospital with one of my dogs that is a therapy dog. I have just finished the application process and am signed up for a welcome session at the end of the month. Volunteering us something that I have always done because it fills my heart and satisfies my soul.


Today my random act of kindness was at the veterinarians office. I had to take one of my dogs this morning. There was an elderly lady with 3 small dogs and she couldn’t open the door while managing her 3 dogs so I held the door open for her. It made me feel really good because I know she would have really struggled to get in the door. A random act of kindness doesn’t have to be big or cost any money. A kind smile or holding the door open for someone can really make their day better.

2 replies
Hope OP February 15th

@Kristynsmama

Kristy you are already excelling on this part! If you would like to share a little bit about how these RAKs have helped your self-esteem then that would be a good addition to our next week's post where we learn from others. Do reach out in PMs if this interests you


1 reply
Kristynsmama February 15th

@Hope. I would love to do this!  I do believe that doing RAKs on a daily basis really does affect my self esteem in a positive way.  I will pm you later today.  :)

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KatePersephone February 14th

@Hope
Yesterday I helped one of my friends out with some issues they were having at school, and today I held the door open for a classmate of mine. I felt really good about doing them. 

5 replies
Hope OP February 15th

@KateDoskocilova

Great! It seems like opening doors is popular on this thread!

Kristynsmama February 15th

@KateDoskocilova

i love how you were able to support a classmate at school!  And holding doors open for someone is my favorite thing to do.  It doesn’t take more than a few seconds and it doesn’t cost me a penny.  And it usually brings a smile to someone’s face.

KatePersephone February 15th

@KateDoskocilova today i helped my mom carry her groceries when she got home.

KatePersephone February 17th

@KateDoskocilova yesterday i helped my friend solve an exercise at school and today i accompanied a classmate of mine to morning classes.

KatePersephone February 22nd

@KateDoskocilova on Sunday, i helped my mom out with cooking. Monday, i took my dog out in the evening. Tuesday, i helped a friend of mine with shopping. Yesterday, i called a friend and resolved some matters and today I once again held the door open at school for a classmate.

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cautiousVixen February 14th

@Hope

I'm struggling a lot with doing uplifting actions. Almost always, I'm afraid that what I'm doing will be out of place. That's definitely something I have to I have to push through for those seven days.

At the indoor climbing hall today, another climber asked me how I managed to get to a certain point in the route. I've stuck with them and explained what I think they could do to progress until they managed to do so. That really made me feel great about myself, as I felt valued and appreciated. It made me proud of myself that I was able to help somebody.

3 replies
Hope OP February 15th

@cautiousVixen

That is a great example of uplifting others. You did great. What will happen if what you did with the goal of uplifting others does end up being out of place?

1 reply
cautiousVixen February 19th

@Hope

It'll probably be a rather awkward situation. For example, if I give tips to another climber without them wanting to receive any. I'd just come off as arrogant or even rude.

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Kristynsmama February 15th

@cautiousVixen

Hmmmm this is an interesting perspective.  I never thought about feeling like my acts of kindness are out of place.  I guess for me out of place means that people don’t do them and that’s that much more of a reason to do them- to inspire others.

im glad you were able to be of support at indoor climbing!  Woosh, ild never be able to support anyone because I’m not a climber!

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YourCaringConfidant February 14th

2/13 Drove and picked up food for loved ones; purchased someone a gift. 

2/14 Bought the kids' teachers each a planner and a boxed of chocolates.

5 replies
Hope OP February 15th

@YourCaringConfidant

Good food in itself is quite the gift!

Kristynsmama February 15th

@YourCaringConfidant

i think that teachers definitely need to be valued more!  My best friend is a secondary school teacher for all aquatic kids and she is a remarkable teacher.  I usually try to send her special notes of appreciation every few months.  I’m sure that every one appreciates your good food and chocolates!

YourCaringConfidant February 16th

2/15 Wrote a letter for someone. 

2/16 Paid someone's bill.

2 replies
YourCaringConfidant February 19th

2/17 Bought my husband a new grill.

2/18 Wrote another letter to send off. 

2/19 Donated to AFSP online. 

1 reply
Hope OP February 20th

@YourCaringConfidant

You are going strong!! Such important acts

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mytwistedsoul February 15th

My closest neighbors are an older couple. I cleared their lane of snow and cleared their walkways and put salt down to melt any ice. I split wood and stacked it for them

I come here and try to offer words of support and encouragement to whoever I can

It feels nice to be able to do these things but talking about them feels weird because it feels like I'm seeking praise 😬

7 replies
Hope OP February 15th

@mytwistedsoul

That is a great act of kindness. I agree with wanting to not disclose the act of kindness and I too prefer it that way. Even for this post, people can share as much or as little as they like. 

Kristynsmama February 15th

@mytwistedsoul

wow, this is a really big act of kindness.  Making sure your elderly neighbors can get in and out of their driveway safely after snow is a wonderful thing to do and I bet they appreciated it more than you know.

I can understand feeling awkward about talking about the kind acts that you do for others.  I often feel weird about talking about mine too for a very similar reason.  I was taught to do one random act of kindness every single day expecting absolutely nothing in return.  And like you, talking about it feels like I’m expecting to be acknowledged just for being kind.

1 reply
mytwistedsoul February 20th

@Kristynsmama They're in their mid 70's I think? I hate to think of them struggling to move snow. It was a heavy wet snow and I definitely don't want either of them to slip and fall. They're just really nice people and were friends of my grandparents and I guess I look at them as surrogate grandparents now. They invite me to cookouts and stuff and it's nice of them to include me :) 

It's awesome that you were taught to do a random act of kindness each day. I know you do a lot of good things here too :)
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mytwistedsoul February 17th

@mytwistedsoul I guess we're supposed to document here for 7 days? 

Yesterday - held the door for someone

Today - took some fresh eggs over to the neighbors and put more salt on their walkways

3 replies
YourCaringConfidant February 17th

@mytwistedsoul You are such a blessing! Aww, thank you for ensuring they are safe by doing what you do. What a sweet gesture. ♡ I honestly don't know if we are supposed to document here for our 7 days but I'm trying to earn the badge and the note at bottom says we will be asked what we did. Lol. It's just easier for me to post here. Anyway, stay sweet, safe, and warm. ♡ Xoxo. 

1 reply
mytwistedsoul February 20th

@YourCaringConfidant Idk about being a blessing but thank you :) They're just really sweet and they've helped me out a few times with watching the animals that are here when I'd have to go out of town

I'm working towards the badge too lol and you're right it is easier to post here
Aww thank you - I hope you're doing ok. Stay awesome! :)
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mytwistedsoul February 20th

2/18 Did some baking and took some cookies over to the neighbors

2/19 Picked up the insides of a toilet at the hardware store for the neighbors  

2/20 planning on fixing their toilet *it whistles and is working on her nerves* he can't hear it at all lol which irritates her more :)


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Gettingbettertoday February 15th

@Hope

I'm lost on the idea of doing things for others builds self-esteem. I do things for others all the time and have little or no self-esteem.  

1 reply
Hope OP February 20th

@Gettingbettertoday

It is okay, not everything wAorks for everyone. As long as you are trying it counts towards the challenge

Hope OP March 4th

@Gettingbettertoday

Not every method works for everyone. Perhaps this one is not suited to your journey

@Gettingbettertoday

Doing things for others is sometime just people pleasing.

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